Ryder
I am lost as to what to do next, I haven't heard from Dina so I am not sure if I should call her or not. I head to the gym for my daily early workout and I see that flash of yellow in the parking lot. Oh dear Fate, thank you for this opportunity, I will try not to waste it.
I don't see her to begin with so I assumed she was in a class, I think they have zumba or yoga, all those girl classes early in the morning. I hit the weights hard, it’s been way too long since I have been laid, but all this sexual frustration has helped me hit the gym even harder. I head over to the treadmills and climbers and there she is. I step in behind where she will come down to and wait.
She is too busy wiping the sweat off her face and bumps right into me. My chest tightens and just seeing her all sweating in tight capris and a tank top with her breasts pushed together in a sports bra make my nether regions begin to harden and grow. I am so glad my shorts are oversized so she can't see the tent that is beginning to start up. I see her admiring my body and my tattoos which makes me wonder if she has any ink hidden under those clothes. Who am I kidding, I don't care if there is ink or not, I just want her under me, while I take my time enjoying every inch of her body and slowly enter her and then bring her to complete ecstasy. As she stands so close I realize her body was made to mold with mine, my ears were made just to hear her scream my name as I bring her through orgasm after orgasm. Down boy, down boy, I have to stop this line of thinking or I am liable to take her right here in the middle of the gym in front of everyone.
I give her a quick good morning and start to make my escape before she can see the bulge in my shorts that I can no longer hide. But she grabs me and invites me to dinner. Oh today, is a great day, I quickly tell her I will be there at seven and to wear jeans so we can take the bike. With that, I exit so I can take an ice cold shower.
The day passes quietly as I try to keep my teenage boy like hormones under control. I get home, shower and dress to hit the road. When I arrive at Dina's she seems in shock over the bike, maybe this was a bad idea, maybe she’s not ready to ride again. She suddenly pulls me inside as she disappears. When she comes back she is braiding her hair and I inwardly smile knowing she’s is ready to enjoy my motorcycle.
Dinner is good, I love watching her and listening to her. I just wish everyone else would leave us the hell alone. I manage politeness but my clients just don't get when to leave me alone. The girls were the worst between the waitress and two previous hookups I am kicking my own ass for the lifestyle I used to lead. When we finish and get outside, I have to apologize to Dina. With all the distraction, I wonder if she wants to just go home, or go out for a drink. When I ask her what she wants to do I can't hide my happiness that she just wants to ride.
We got outside and I couldn't help myself and gave her a small kiss. I quickly stopped myself from making it anything more than a brush because I want to have this time with her, this ride, and much more I wouldn't be able to stop myself from taking her wherever we happen to be. We start on the ride and her arms being around my waist make me so thankful that I don't have a sissy bar on the back for passengers. I have never taken anyone out on my bike before and I know that no one will ever feel as right or as good as she does. I reach my free hand around and rest it on her leg. This is home, this is right, this is good, and this is everything I ever could want.
I walk her to her door, intending to just give her a quick kiss. I linger a little too long and she pulls me into her. At first I couldn't believe she did it, she is so shy and reserved, but she put her arms around my neck pulled me down and went in for it. I easily open to receive her tongue and did my own giving. I can feel the pleading and wanting coming off her body in waves, but it’s too soon. I want her for the long term not just the night. It takes everything in me to pull away, but I want to make slow love to her entire body not just a heated, quick, hit it, get it and go. Dina deserves better than that and I am not sure what all I can give her right now.
Chapter Six
Dina
Saturday morning arrives and I head in to the office to organize a few things for tonight’s MMA fighting event. Maggie walks in an hour behind me and immediately wants details, hello, that’s what best friends do. I give her a brief run down leaving out the front porch kiss. My insecurities have me wondering if Ryder only kissed me back not to hurt my feelings. This is the man who has seen firsthand my poor relationship decisions. As the day carries on with no word from Ryder I began to question everything even more. Did he even really want to go to dinner with me? How fragile does he think I am? He kissed me back, but he didn't put his arms around me, I am the one that pushed the kiss further, did he want to kiss me? Does he feel the passion and fire I feel just at his presence? What if he just went along to fix the broken me? Enough, I tell myself, I cannot spend my time questioning everything. I will just have to put my big girl panties on, step into my pair of I am strong boots and walk right into taking chances again. I can do this and I will do this.
Maggie and I head over to the complex hosting the cage fight to make sure things are lining up right. Brayden walks right up and without saying so much as hello, he takes her into an all-consuming kiss that makes even me think, get a room people. When Maggie broke away, something seems off in Braydens eyes tonight, he just seemed in a daze.
My heart begins to flutter sensing Ryder nearby. He strides up in a Tapout shirt, jeans, and the red head attached to him like an extra appendage. My smile immediately disappears as I realize, yep, dinner was all just pity. He peels his addition off his side and pulls me into a hug. I inhale his scent of Perry Ellis and Ryder as he leans down to whisper, "Dina, this is not what it looks like I promise you that." He kisses my forehead with his hands now on my hips. As I fight back tears, I boldly look him in the eye to say, "It’s none of my business. Enjoy the fights tonight. Please excuse me as I need to go check the merchandise table. I will see you around, ok." And with that I took off before anyone could try to stop me.
I manage to work the entire event without seeing Ryder or Brayden. Maggie seems a little off as the night wore on but I was just ready to go home. Before leaving, I send a text to Maggie that I was tired and planned to ignore my phone Sunday, but would see her for girl’s day Monday. I don't want or need her sending over a certain babysitter who obviously had plans tonight.
So here I sit, on Sunday, in my oldest, most comfortable pajamas, a bag of chocolate, a bowl of popcorn, and a marathon of Lifetime movies. I take this day alone to get my head on straight.
Ok, so Ryder's just not that into me, well it is what it is. I do still need to be out more. The way things are going, Maggie and Brayden will be getting engaged soon, then comes marriage, and that whole baby carriage business. I am happy for her. I just wish I had that companionship, love, support, encouragement, and partnership. Although, I must admit I don't understand their situation lately or Braydens behavior last night. He's not usually one for over the top PDAs or driving her little Audi A4 for that matter, he likes muscle cars not imports. At the end of the day, my bestie is over the moon in love and happy so I too am overjoyed for her.
Ryder
I desperately want to call Dina, but I don't want to crowd her. Brayden called and asked me to give him a ride to tonight’s cage fight at the complex since Maggie is working he will ride home with her. I decide to go since that means Dina will be there. I can't get the kiss out of my mind and who knows maybe when she is done working tonight I can manage to get another one and really show her how I feel about her.
I arrive at Brayden's to find he has company, in the form of Valerie. Why is she here I wonder to myself? Brayden looks like he is in a daze, but he just shrugs and climbs in the car. I know Valerie and Brayden are just friends and he wouldn't risk anything with Maggie, what I don't know is why she is getting in my car too. I look in the backseat and ask her, "Val, what’s the deal, why are you here and why the hell are you getting in my car?" She smiles what I think is her attempt at seduction, howe
ver, failing miserably. "Oh I ran into Brayden this morning and asked if I could tag along to the fight tonight, he said sure. I will be on my best behavior Ryder, don't worry." I just start the car and pull away.
What have I gotten myself into? Valerie and I don't have a good history. I did her wrong. We met at a party where Brayden and I were; I gave her all the lines and used every bit of charm and charisma to get her in my bed. I didn't know until we were in the midst of things that she was a virgin. I wish I could say that stopped me, but it didn't. I took what she freely gave, and walked away.
That night after pounding Michaels face in for Dina, I realized although I don't beat on women I use them and hurt them. I called Valerie to apologize for being a complete douche bag. Now I can't seem to get away from her, she is everywhere. She is a well-played reminder from karma of just how bad I used to be to women.
We arrive and immediately find Dina and Maggie. Of course, Valerie decides she can't keep her hands off me. I can see the hurt in Dina's eyes, but this is not the time or the place for me to try to explain to her just how damaged I left Valerie. I try to speak to her, but she is busy working and soon she is gone. I take Valerie home, thankful to be away from her finally. I have a tension headache building and I don't think any amount of Tylenol will make me feel any better.
Chapter 7
Dina
Three weeks have passed since my date with Ryder. He has called and text quite a bit actually, but has been out of town handling some personal business. I am at the office working on a new restaurant grand opening event when a flower delivery person arrived. The arrangement is absolutely gorgeous full of bright California gerbera daisies, tulips, tiger lilies, and one red rose. It is so big and full in a huge basket. I automatically assumed they were for Mags, so I sign for them and place them on her desk. I realize then that she is a lot later than I expected her to be after she called this morning to say she needed a little extra time and would miss our meeting with a new client to help promote their new brew line.
She arrives looking exhausted and not as put together as she normally is. Before I have a chance to ask her what was wrong, she began crying, "Brayden didn't come home until 6am this morning. He wouldn't tell me where he was other than to say he slept in the car. Dina, I just don't understand, we weren't fighting or anything major, we had a minor disagreement over money but nothing to send him out all night." How do I even comfort my friend from that? I gently hug her and reply, "Whoever knows what men really think or why they do what they do? Maybe he just needed space for a bit. You know he adores you and he didn't set out to spend the night away." She appears a little better and the crying has stopped as she nodded and gave a weak smile.
She entered her office, saw the flowers, and laughed, "Dina, did you even look at the card?" "What card?" I ask as I enter her office door, "Oh the flowers, no, why would I? No one has any reason to send me flowers." As I say this she is handing me the card with my name on the outer envelope. Flowers for me, this is a first since Michael, who sent me apology flowers after leaving behind his own colorful marks somewhere on my body. With nervous and shaky hands, I open the card.
Sunshine, just thinking of you. I miss you and hope to be home to see you soon. Love, Ryder.
Oh my goodness, Ryder misses me. Maggie laughs at my shock. She hugs me, and reminds me, "Go call and thank him silly." I only get his voicemail, so I just leave a quick message, "Thank you for the beautiful flowers and card, Ryder, it really made my day."
Ryder
I have dealt with the many ups and downs that are Valerie over the almost three years or so since my apology. The call I received Sunday after the cage fight topped them all. Her sister Vanessa called to say, Val attempted suicide and Vanessa couldn't have her around her kids or deal with her anymore. I went over and talked to them both. Turns out Valerie had a drug addiction to oxycodone and she was at rock bottom from my rejection. Guilty conscience kicks in and so now I am in Colorado with her at a rehab facility. I am trying to be supportive and help her, but my mind and heart are with Dina.
We have been texting and calling, she hasn't said anything about Saturday night. She asked where I was and I just said personal business. I don't know how to face her and say I screwed up a girl so bad she needed rehab. Three weeks into the treatment, I felt the urge to do something to show Dina just how much I missed her. What’s every man’s answer? Flowers of course, yes this will bring a smile to her face and surprise her.
Chapter Eight
Dina
By the next day, Maggie seemed much better. After work I was relaxing in a bubble bath with my Jacuzzi tub jets running when my phone rang. It was Ryder.
"Hey, misterman." I answer. "Hello, beautiful, it’s good to hear you voice after we have been playing phone tag since yesterday. What are you doing this evening?"
Well, we are on the phone and I am feeling brave so I answer in almost a whisper, "I am in the bath tub, covered in nothing but bubbles, relaxing, thinking of how I wish it were you covering me instead of the bubbles." He was quiet for a moment; I think I heard a groan from him. With his voice deeper than I have ever heard him before, "Damn, Dina you are killing me over here. Oh how I wish I was there. I would be happy to wash your back for you." I smile and add, "Just my back, huh, what about my front?" I hear him groan, "Oh baby, you don't want to start something, you can't finish." I stay quiet for just a brief moment, "Ryder, I will be glad to start and finish anything with you, anytime, anywhere. The question is am I what you really want?" There I said it, now am I really ready for an answer?
He then shocks me to my core with his admission, "Dina, it’s been you and only you I have wanted since the first night I met you at the restaurant. Since the night we found you at the bottom of the stairs, I beat the shit out of that bastard, I haven't been with anyone. I have been waiting for you to get over that situation and feel comfortable and safe again." He pauses and sighs, but continues, "Dina, you are one of a kind special. I am far from a perfect man, I am not even a good man, but for you and because of you I want to be. I have treated women wrong in the past, I have used them, lead them on, dumped them in some harsh ways. I have never laid a hand on a female, but I have left some completely broken unintentionally, and for that I am sorry. For you, I don't want to lead you on or treat you wrong. I want to be your safe place, Dina; I never want to see you sad, or hurt. I want to hold you close and call you mine in all ways. Baby, I have messed up big time in my past and I am paying for it even now. I don't deserve someone as strong and beautiful as you. I have tried to stay away from you, but you just draw me in. When you look at me, I feel that you see the potential in me and all the good that is inside this messed up man I am. One kiss is enough to make me weak in the knees. Dina, I want to see what we can make of the electricity between us. I wish I was there, I didn't want to do this by phone."
I take a moment because I don't know what to say. Finally, I stammer through, "Ryder, you mean so much to me. You saved me when I was at my lowest. I want to see what we can make of us. I won't lie, I am scared, but I trust you with my insecurities. I trust you with every part of me. My body craves your touch, Ryder, my mind craves your conversation, and my heart craves your safety. I trust you, Ryder, to help restore me." I hear a voice in the background, then Ryder says, "Oh baby you have just made the whole situation here so much better. I would love nothing more than to tell you exactly how I would wash every inch of your body, but I have to go, I am needed. I will call you tomorrow. I will see you as soon as I can get back home and we will make this work, Goodnight, my sunshine." Before I can respond, he is gone.
I don't know what to think. I am filled with sexual frustration where I just want this man to take me and have his way with me. I am filled with an undeniable happiness that I mean something to him and that he wants to see where this can lead. I just wish he were here I would show him in ways I can't put into words just how much I want to be with him in all ways. He left me so abruptly I feel the ache deep in my
core that even my battery operated boyfriend can't relieve the tension inside.
Ryder
I just finished joining Valerie for her counseling session at rehab. Apparently, she had a lot of insecurities and issues before I came along, but she still wants me. She understands I never wanted her in the first place and she is learning to deal with rejection in a positive manner. That is why they asked me to join her today so she could face the rejection head on without the drugs to help her forget the feeling.
I am in my hotel room with plans to spend the evening chatting with Dina. It’s so good to hear her voice and not just on a voice mail message. When I ask her what she was doing, I heard the tubs jets in the background but I never expected her to tell me she was in the bath thinking of me. I can imagine her skin glistening from the water, when I offer to wash her back I can picture myself sliding in the tub behind her and pulling her close to me. Just the mention of her front had me imagining running my hands over her full breasts spending time and attention on her rose bud nipples. Kneading and massaging her large, luscious breasts, then giving a gentle tug at her nipple. In my head I can feel her against me and hear her moan in pleasure from that simple touch. Oh the things I want to do with her. Somehow, as I am having this fantasy I end up revealing a lot of my feelings to her unintentionally. I should have just stuck with sex talk because not only do I have a serious erection but the ache is so deep in my balls I am going to have to find relief soon by myself in the shower, instead of hearing her voice as I get off.
Restore My Heart (Daddy's Girls) Page 3