Before I can redirect the conversation, Vanessa knocks on my door telling me Valerie’s counselor wants to see all of us. Well, the sooner I get done with my part in this mess, the sooner I can get home and have that bath with Dina. I quickly shower and handle some man’s business while I am in there so I can head over to the rehab facility.
Chapter 9
Dina
It’s been three days since I have actually talked with Ryder. We have text back and forth but can never seem to get our timing right to chat. As each day passes, my curiosity eats at me. I know he’s away and in a different time zone, what I don’t know is where or why.
Maggie asks me to come to Ryder’s garage to finish up a seating chart for an upcoming charity event we have been hired to plan. I arrive and see why she needs to be here. With Ryder away, Brayden can’t keep up with the phones, finding parts and doing mechanics.
I head straight for Ryder’s desk, telling Mags, “We will just have to do the seating chart later, your boy needs help. I will order the parts on this list; you answer the phones as best you can. Later today, you can go pick up the parts and stop by my house and pick up some different clothes for me so I can get under a hood and help Bray.” She hugged me and said, “Thanks so much Dina, I am so glad you know what he needs, I am in over my head in here. I am also glad my bestie likes my boyfriend.”
I walk into Ryder’s office which has enough old Chilton Car Repair Manuals fill two huge book shelves on the back wall, papers, and small parts litter the desk, and his laptop sits in his chair closed. I sit down and turn on the computer. As it loads I find that he has a picture of me and Maggie as his screen saver. I decide that I really miss Ryder, but also this is his business, does he know how much Brayden really needs his help right now? With that, I send him a quick text.
Hope all is well where ever you are, misterman. Mags and I are spending the day at your shop to help out B. We all miss you.
I can’t help the bitter feeling rising up that I don’t know where he is or what he is doing. I throw myself into work so I can distract my negative thoughts as to why Ryder isn’t here.
As we are closing the shop, Brayden hugs me, “Thanks for all the help, D. I don’t know how much longer Valerie needs Ryder where they are so I am not sure how long I am on my own here.” I am so shocked to hear that Ryder is off with Valerie while I am here alone. I guess the hurt and anger were evident on my face because Mags quickly added, “It’s not what it sounds like Dina. Ryder is a good guy and he really cares about you. Valerie just needed help.”
With that I just head home. Everyone seems to know what Ryder is doing but me. I am the one alone and yes I am now angry and bitter. Whatever his deal is with Valerie, fine so be it, but he didn’t have to drag me into it. I have already really fallen for the idea of me and Ryder as a couple, but I alas, I guess all along it was just that an idea. He has too much tied up with Valerie for me to fit in anywhere. This is all just his pity for poor abused Dina, who couldn’t get herself out of a bad situation. He probably just likes the idea of fixing broken Dina and not really being in a committed relationship with me. I can’t help but let the tears fall. I wish my dad were here to help me understand the male brain. My phone rings, its Ryder. I pause, do I answer it, don’t I answer it? Do I really want to talk to him while I am hurting? Do I really want him to know what I am thinking or feeling right this minute? I just don’t know if I am ready to talk to him knowing he is off with Valerie.
Ryder
Texting is not enough; I need to hear her voice. The phone rings five times, then voicemail. Screw it; I call again, three rings and she answers. Finally, I don’t care if she does think I am crazy, I need to talk to her, I need to tell her everything that is going on.
She answers in an unfamiliar distant tone, “Hello, Ryder.” She sounds hurt almost, or disappointed, I don’t know which. She has never sounded this way with me. “Hey, sunshine, I miss you. Thanks for helping Brayden at the shop.” I have so much tension and nervous energy running through me. Will she understand? I need to just get it out and tell her why I am away. In a voice cold as ice, “Ryder, I am happy to help any friend who needs me.”
Friend, friend, oh no sweetheart, we are more than friends. I will make sure you know that as soon as I get my ass back home. I plan to have to writhing under my body begging me for your release and screaming out my name. No sweetheart, we are not friends we are soon to be lovers. She must know better than that, she has to be referring to Brayden, yes that’s it.
“Look, Dina, if you have some time to talk I would like to explain what’s going on.” Before I could continue she interrupted, “Oh so now you decide to tell me. What did Brayden tell you he slipped up and I know you are off with Valerie?” Shit, I knew I should have told her already.
“No, Dina I haven’t spoken with Brayden in two days. I just need to get this off my chest and tell you why I am away.” She sighs but it’s a relaxing sound, like she needs to hear this as much as I need to tell her.
So I begin, “So much of me changed since meeting you. I have a past, one that I am not proud of and Valerie is part of that past. Right now, I am in Colorado with Vanessa, who is Valerie’s twin sister, to help Val get through drug rehab.
You know that Brayden and I met and became friends in college. Brayden and Valerie were friends even before him and me, which is how I met her. I used to be a real ass of a guy and only cared about getting laid. I wanted a different girl every day. Brayden and I were at a party a few years back when Valerie approached me. I turned on the charm, told her all the things she wanted to hear. I even boldly lied saying I wanted to have a serious relationship, settle down, anything to get in her panties. She told me she was a virgin, but even that didn’t stop me. We hooked up and I planned to never talk to her again. I even told her so afterward, when I got up and left her lying naked in her own bed, the evidence of her lost virginity on the sheets. The next week, she tried to call me, even came to my house, I just blew her off. At that time, my mentality was, on to the next. She kept coming around though, so on and off I would hook up with her just because it was an easy guaranteed piece of ass.
Dina, I never dated her and other then that first night, I never again led her on about a future. I thought she had come to terms with it. I thought she knew we were just an easy hook up. Then that night with you and Michael, seeing the hurt in your eyes, seeing the pain deep inside you, it just made something in me snap. I didn’t want to ever see that look from any woman. Valerie was with me that night when we arrived to find you on the ground and Michael kicking you. She didn’t even care what he did to you she just wanted me and I just wanted to kill Mike with my bare hands for hurting you. She left while I beat the shit out of that bastard. I called her the next morning and told her I couldn’t do this anymore. I made sure to apologize for disrespecting her and her body by using her. I told her there was no future between her and I and that I wished her happiness and love. Since then I have not hooked up with her. I have only seen her when she randomly happens to be somewhere I am. I have tried to be a friend, giving her a ride home when she was too drunk or whatever. Apparently though she didn’t handle my rejection well, and has been doing drugs heavily since that day almost three years ago.”
I take a moment to breath before continuing, “She tried to commit suicide after the night of the cage fight because of me. I told her there was no room for her in my life. I made the mistake of telling her my feelings for you. I told her that I was waiting for you no matter how long it took. She went home to her sister’s house and cut her wrists in front of Vanessa’s two young children. Vanessa called me because all Val would say is this is for Ryder to be happy.”
I can hear Dina crying softly on the other end of the phone. I wonder what she thinks of me now, but I decide to continue on. “We got Valerie to the hospital where they found drugs in her system. Vanessa asked me to help by getting Val into rehab. I agreed to help, however, Valerie only agreed to go if I would stay
in a hotel nearby and be at her counseling sessions when permitted. I am only here to hopefully help heal the wounds I created.”
I paused trying to gauge her reaction, but I got nothing but the sounds of her softly crying still. “I am sorry, Dina, that I didn’t tell you sooner. I just didn’t want you to know that side of me.” I sighed for a moment, before I could start back, she replied, “I just don’t know what to think Ryder.”
She took a minute to compose her thoughts, “No one is perfect, and we all make mistakes. From the moment I met you, Ryder, you have taken my breath away. There has always been this strong connection to you that I cannot deny. I have never felt so drawn to someone so instantly. I can understand how Valerie finds it hard to walk away because I too can’t resist you. My heart hurts for her inner pain, but really, attempted suicide and drugs are a big cry for help. She has issues, Ryder, bigger ones that go far beyond the heart break of losing her innocence to a player.”
I breathe for a moment, thinking ok, this is going to be ok. Then she begins, “My issue Ryder is your lack of trust in me to communicate what is going on. We can’t have anything worth having if we don’t have trust and communication.”
She is so right, I manage to stammer, “I know, Dina, and I am sorry. I have waited so long for you to even say more than hello to me. I was afraid of what you would think and then never speak to me again at all.”
She sighs deeply, “Ryder, I can’t get enough of you, but I do need some time to digest all of this. You also need some time to handle things there without the distraction of me. Do what you need to do in order to help Valerie, we will talk about things when you get home, ok.” I answer with a simple, “ok.” With that she hung up before I could say anything more.
Chapter 10
Dina
Two days after the long talk with Ryder I still don’t know how I feel about any of it. What I do know is I trust Ryder not to hurt me, I also know he has serious feelings for me and I have impacted him just as he saved me. And as hard as it is to admit, I am head over heels in love with Ryder Cole Davenport. I love him like I have never loved or trusted anyone else. He is the half that makes me feel whole. He is where I feel safe, where I feel at home, and where I feel I am meant to be.
I arrive at the office to an extremely frazzled Maggie. When I ask her what is wrong, she proceeds to tell me that she has searched everywhere but she can’t find her company credit card. She needed to order linens and place cards for the charity event today but she can’t find the card. I know Maggie and I know how she feels about disorganization, everything has a place with her and she puts everything back where she gets it from. So I know that is why she is so upset. I have lost cards before so I don’t think much of it and hand her another card to use. I decide I will wait to cancel the card to see if she finds it, this is Maggie; she has never lost one before so it will turn up.
Maggie got what she needed to order done. When she came into my office, I thought it was because she had work needs. I was surprised when she began to cry, “Dina, I think Brayden is cheating on me. I don’t know what to do.” I don’t know what to say. Brayden and Maggie have been together four years and he still can’t get enough of her. They rarely argue. He looks at her with eyes that are full of love and passion; there is no way he was cheating. I just couldn’t believe that. “Maggie, what makes you think he is cheating?” She sobs, “Well, he stayed gone all night last night saying he had to work. I went by the shop around nine and he wasn’t there. I called and he wouldn’t answer. He hasn’t been interested in time with me in months and sex almost seems like a chore for him. I just don’t know where it all went wrong.” I am left stunned in silence.
Then I realize, “Maggie, he worked all day nonstop, he was probably gone for coffee and dinner when you went by. As for the last few months Ryder’s business has stayed nonstop busy, the man is probably tired by the time he gets in. Maggie, I think you are just feeling disconnected because he has been so tired. Once Ryder gets back I know for sure things will get better.”
She instantly smiles, “I am such a mess sometimes, and you are right D. He’s given me no reason not to trust him. I am just being needy. Thanks bestie for making me feel better.”
Chapter 11
Ryder
Valerie seems to be handling things much better. Her last counseling session the doctor told me this wasn’t my fault to be at ease. Valerie even agreed her problems were bigger than me. She even told me to leave and that she was sorry for not letting me go sooner. I am so ready to get back home to Dina.
There is so much left unsaid between the two of us I am nervous as I board the plane to head back. She offered to pick me up at the airport so that is a good sign, I hope. My flight arrives at 11:22pm North Carolina time. I am hoping there are no delays because I don’t want to spend one more day away from her. Dina and I need to talk before taking me home. I need to express just how I feel for her.
Dina
After having been apart these last few weeks, I can’t wait to see Ryder tonight. I told him I would pick him up because I didn’t want to wait another day to see him.
The past is just that the past, he is my future, and I am ready for it.
I dress for tonight with specific thoughts in mind. I know Ryder loves blacks and grays. So tonight I dress in my favorite all lace charcoal gray panties and matching strapless bra. My dress is a spaghetti strap number with a dip in the breasts, enhancing my already noticeable cleavage. Maggie helped me pick it out and its form fitting with a line of trim in gray just under the bust accenting my breasts even more. I wear my hair down, no jewelry, and my favorite gray heels. Oh yes, I was dressed for seduction tonight.
Chapter 12
Dina
I was going to take one of the older cars, but decided the mustang would be best since the window tint is darker. I arrive at the airport a little early so I find where he will come out and anxiously await.
I sense him before I actually see him. He is wearing his usual t-shirt and jeans, his hair is a little longer and I just imagine running my fingers through it. He is carrying his duffel bag, so no need for baggage claim after all.
Just looking at him my stomach tightens and I feel the liquid pooling in my panties. As he approaches I can sense that he is nervous. I decide now is the time for my inner diva to be in control. I walk right up and wrap my arms around his neck pulling him in to me. I kiss him with everything I have, refusing to hold anything back. He takes a minute before just dropping his bag and wrapping his arms around me. As I pull him tighter to me he begins slowly moving his hands over my back, my sides, my hips, then he gently cups my ass causing me to moan in pleasure. I am more than ready to take him here and now. I don’t even care who is around and watches I just need this man. Suddenly, he pulls away, leaving me whimpering in want. “Dina, baby, whoa, lets breathe for a minute. I want you so bad, but not here, not like this. You are my future, you are my everything. We have all the time in the world baby. Let’s get out of here so we can talk.” I realize that he is right, no I don’t want this here and well we are supposed to talk, but I hope we don’t do that until later, way later.
We get to my car and head off to his house. He keeps his hand on my thigh gently massaging my leg the entire ride. We arrive at Ryder’s house, I unbuckle my seat belt. Before I can open my door, however, he stops me. “Can we talk out here, D? I am afraid if I have you inside my house, as irresistible as you are right now that I won’t be able to talk to you.”
I smile a seductive grin, “sure thing Ryder, but just so long as you know I will end up inside your house with you.” I wanted to add with you inside me, but I didn’t.
He starts to talk, but I climb over the gear shift in my car and on to his lap. I already had the passenger seat slid all the way back because I knew he would need the leg room just riding in my car. I straddle him, sliding my dress up so I wouldn’t be restricted; this allowed my panties to peek out just a bit. Before Ryder has a chance to react to an
ything, I put my finger across his mouth, “Shhhhh, Ryder, I plan to be a distraction no matter where we are. The past is the past, the future is right here in front of us. I want to be with you and right now I don’t want to talk I just want to be lost with you.”
With that I come down hard on his mouth, kissing him with all the passion inside of me. His hands immediately come up on to me. He starts rubbing my sides and hips, as I move my hands through his hair. He moves his hands sliding my dress up leaving my ass and panties out on display. He cups my ass sliding me forward up against him. I could feel his erection through his jeans. I rocked my hips and just that friction alone was enough to make me thoroughly wet and aching with need.
I reach my hands down pulling off his t-shirt. As the shirt came over his head, I use the break in kissing to move down to his neck. I take my time gently kissing, sucking, licking, and nipping at his neck and shoulders. He moves the straps of my dress down and moaned when he got a glimpse of my lacy bra. I began to take in all his tattoos, licking my way over the dragon that covered his shoulder, half his chest and side of his neck. I gently kissed at the tattoo up on his rib that was written in script there is nothing to fear but fear itself, conquer it all.
He unhooked my bra, releasing my breasts. He massages one breast in his hand and brought his mouth down hard and fast on the other nipple. He is licking and sucking one while massaging and tugging the other. When he switches to give each breast equal attention, I cry out in pleasure.
I lean over to recline his seat back as I did he brought his hand down to my panties. As I began to kiss his stomach and chest, he slid my panties off, his hands finding my most sensitive mound. As his fingers explore my slick folds, he began a slow tease with his tongue on my neck. I thought I would combust right there. He inserted one finger inside me; I began to tremble in the pleasure and passion between us. Ryder gasped, “Oh baby you are so wet and tight, aaahhhhh.” As he added a second finger stretching me, I became lost in my own sensations. I knew I was close to climax, when he took my nipple in his mouth, it pushed me over the edge. My whole body is shaking from the intensity of it all.
Restore My Heart (Daddy's Girls) Page 4