A Foolish Plan

by Casper Graham

  “Whatever. Back to my problem. How should I pop the question to Isaac?”

  You two are already as good as married, man.”

  Dexter glared at Jared. “It’s different. I want Isaac and me to be legally wedded to each other. I hope we can adopt two kids together someday. Maybe three.”

  “Whoa! You’re serious!”

  Dexter frowned at Jared. “Duh! Have you been listening to me for the past ten minutes or so? Fuck, man. I know I’m not Steve, but I’m still your best friend. Pay a little attention to me when I speak.”

  Jared detected the frustration in Dexter’s voice, and he felt bad for his best friend. He wished he could be serious for an extended period of time, but that simply wasn’t him. Being solemn and earnest was weird to him. He liked to poke fun at things, and he enjoyed lighthearted conversations. He could be austere and businesslike when he had to be, especially when it came to any professional circumstances, but when he was with his friends and family, he naturally reverted to being mischievous and carefree.

  “Okay. Fine. I insist Isaac will love my proposal method, though.”

  Dexter seemed to be on the verge of scowling, but the expression was quickly replaced by a thoughtful one. “Are you positive?”

  Jared grinned. “Yes! Isaac is quiet in comparison to you, Steve, and me. He has this serene, peaceful disposition most of the time, and he probably won’t care much how you do it as long as you put a ring on his finger.”

  “But?”

  “But everybody goes insane over a public declaration of love and devotion. Isaac won’t be any different from anyone else.”

  Dexter’s expression showed he still had some hesitation and reservation about Jared’s scheme. “I don’t know, man.”

  “Come on, Dex. Just imagine it inside your head. The two of you are outside somewhere. It’s night time. There are many, many people around you. Suddenly, the gentle, sweet music starts playing, and a group of hired dancers begins to twirl around slowly. You drag Isaac toward the dancers. You hold him close to you as you both move in sync to the rhythm of the music. Then the music ends, and you get down on one knee. You say some sappy and disgusting shit to him before you ask him to marry you, and he cries buckets and buckets and buckets of tears before he agrees to marry your sorry ass because he knows no one in this whole wide world will be stupid enough to get hitched to your ugly face—”

  “Fuck you, jerk!”

  “Shut up, Dex. I’m not done. Where was I?”

  Dexter rolled his eyes in a way that was reminiscent of the way Isaac would do it, and Jared shuddered at that. Dexter and Isaac were rubbing off on each other in more ways than one.

  “Isaac agrees to marry me because—”

  “Oh, yes. Isaac is the only one who’s kind enough to marry your ugly face because he pities you. As you slide the white gold ring with a fifty-carat diamond on his ring finger—”

  “Fifty?”

  “That’s because you’re a cheap asshole. You could have afforded a one-thousand-carat diamond ring.”

  Dexter snorted. “I don’t think there’s such a thing as a one-thousand-carat diamond ring. Besides, Isaac isn’t the materialistic type. He insists on working at the diner even though I’ve been telling him he doesn’t need to. I have more than enough money to—”

  “Shut up, Dex. I’m not done with my fantasy yet.”

  Dexter chortled. “Okay. Go on.”

  Jared narrowed his eyes at Dexter. “Are you making fun of me inside your head?”

  “Nope.”

  Jared didn’t believe it. Dexter looked too amused at the moment. However, Jared was more excited by his vision of Dexter’s proposal to Isaac.

  “Anyway, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, you will present Isaac with a ring. The moment it’s on his ring finger, the dark evening sky will light up with hundreds and thousands of roman candles and fireworks.”

  “Won’t that be excessive and dangerous?”

  Jared scoffed at Dexter. “Of course not! It’s romantic.”

  Dexter snickered. “Okay.”

  Jared huffed. “Think about it, man. It will be perfect. Isaac will bawl his eyes out. He will sob against your broad, muscular chest. Then the two of you will go home and celebrate with a night of sweet lovemaking until the morning hours. Isn’t that awesome?”

  Dexter let out a loud guffaw. “You have lost your fucking mind. Steve needs to have you committed into the mental asylum pronto.”

  Jared got up on his feet. “Whatever. I’m going now.”

  Dexter was still chuckling as he stood, as well. “Come on, buddy. Don’t be angry at me. I was teasing you.”

  “Fuck you, Dex.”

  “That’s Steve’s job now.”

  Jared, who was walking halfway toward the office door, turned around to face Dexter and winked. “And he does it really well, too. This morning alone, he fucked me so—”

  “Shut up, Jared. Get out of my office, you son of a bitch. I don’t want to hear the details of my two best friends having sex with each other. You two are dating now. That’s too much for me.”

  Jared laughed as he ran toward the door. “Later, Dex.”

  “Fuck off!” Dexter shouted while shaking his head.

  Jared was certain Dexter was still cursing at him as he rushed off toward the elevator, but he couldn’t be bothered to stay and listen. He knew Dexter. They had known each other for decades now. He had no doubt Dexter would carry through with the plan. Dexter might complain about it, but Jared could tell that his best friend actually loved the idea. As he stepped into the elevator, he typed out a long message to Stephen. He was sure that Stephen would love to hear about the latest development between Dexter and Isaac.

  * * * *

  Stephen had no clue why he was still looking at houses and apartments all over New York. He already had a favorite, and he knew Jared loved it, too. Moreover, he and Jared could have easily moved into either one of each other’s current houses and called it a day. However, they both wanted a new place. It had to be something fresh for both of them. Unfortunately, they hadn’t been able to locate a place that they were both equally thrilled by, except for one particular house. It was a six-story structure that was forty feet wide. There were six opulent bedrooms, seven luxurious bathrooms, two living rooms, a beautiful dining room, a kitchen with state-of-the-art appliances, a saltwater pool, a double-height library, heated onyx floors, a three-thousand-square-foot roof terrace, and a movie theater. Most importantly, there was a basement that could be converted into a private gym for both of them. There was even enough space in the garage for all of their cars. It was perfect. Stephen didn’t know why he hadn’t simply purchased it the last time he and Jared were there together.

  “Babe, are you okay?”

  Jared’s voice startled Stephen out of his reverie. He smiled at Jared and nodded.

  “Yeah. Just thinking about something.”

  Jared smirked. “Were you still hung up on that house with the saltwater pool and heated onyx floor?”

  Stephen was taken aback, but he shouldn’t be. Jared might not be the most observant person in the whole wide world, but it didn’t mean he was obtuse about everything, and Stephen knew that about his boyfriend better than anyone else, except for Dexter.

  “Yeah. Do you think it’s still on the market?”

  Jared shrugged. “Beats me. Do you want me to give the agent a call? I’m sure she won’t mind meeting us there. It’s only three minutes past eight o’clock now. We will finish our dinner in about fifteen minutes. We can reach the house by nine o’clock at the latest. It’s not that far from this restaurant. That house isn’t cheap. The world may be full of wealthy people, but not many of them can afford a house that costs almost half a billion dollars at the drop of a hat.”

  “True. Let’s do it then.”

  Jared complied to the request, and Stephen was invigorated now. He truly loved that house. There was something about it he simply couldn’t
get out of his mind. He couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was. He just desired it. Period. He was so thrilled about it, he ignored Jared for the next few minutes. Besides, Jared was busy with his smartphone. He was probably handling some last-minute thing related to the restaurants. The moment their dinner date was over, Stephen dragged Jared toward the car. Unlike any of their previous dates, he was the one driving this time around. He sped toward the house as quickly as he could. However, his heart sank a little when he and Jared eventually arrived at their destination. The agent had an apologetic look on her face, and Stephen had a terrible feeling about it.

  “Mr. Howard, Mr. Masters, I’m really so sorry, but I’m afraid you may have come here for nothing. I just received the news that another interested buyer had given the owner quite a high offer to buy the property less than thirty minutes ago. The final sale and payment are pending upon the owner’s acceptance of the offer. Then the lawyers will check up on all of the pertinent documents related to the property. If everything is good, the house will be taken off the market.”

  “Can we make a counter offer?”

  The agent nodded at Stephen. “You may try.”

  “Let’s do that,” Stephen said before coming up with a figure. “In the meantime, may we take a look inside? We won’t be long. I promise.”

  “Certainly,” the agent responded with before leading the way into the house. “Why don’t you have a look around while I talk to the owner?”

  “Great.”

  After that, Stephen tugged on Jared’s hand as they toured all over the house for the second time. It was as amazing as he remembered it. Jared was strangely quiet, and Stephen couldn’t understand the reason for that. Most of the time, Jared would have some cheeky comments for anything and everything. Stephen didn’t analyze Jared’s behavior any further, though. He was too preoccupied with the incredible house. His joy and delight mounted with every passing second, but his mood came crashing down when he and Jared returned to the agent, who was waiting for them by the front door of the house.

  “Mr. Howard—”

  “Let me guess. The owner had already approved the first offer, and the initial deposit had been made mere minutes before my counter offer was submitted.”

  The agent smiled at Stephen. “That’s right. We were late by about three minutes.”

  Stephen was highly disappointed, but it wasn’t the agent’s fault. “It’s all right then. Thank you for trying.”

  “You’re welcome. If there’s a similar house on the market in the foreseeable future, I’ll definitely inform you about it.”

  “That will be wonderful. Thank you. Jared and I will be leaving then. We really appreciate you meeting us here this late in the evening.”

  “It’s my pleasure. Have a good evening.”

  “You, too.”

  Stephen and Jared got inside the car and drove away from the property. However, Jared was so quiet, Stephen was a little intrigued by his boyfriend’s behavior. He removed one hand from the steering wheel to tap on Jared’s thigh. Jared arched his left eyebrow at Stephen in response.

  “What?”

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah. Sure. What about you?”

  “A little sad about the house, but I’ll be fine.”

  Jared beamed at Stephen. “We will get something better.”

  “Maybe.”

  After that, Stephen changed the topic. He didn’t want to think about the house anymore. Something better might come along in the near future. He just had to remain patient. Besides, there was another topic that was more exciting, and that was Dexter and Isaac’s impending engagement. Stephen agreed with Jared that it was a done deal. They both knew how crazy in love Dexter and Isaac were with each other. There was no way Isaac would reject Dexter’s proposal. That wonderful news was almost enough to help him forget about his dream house. Almost.

  Chapter 14

  “Can you stop fiddling around and touching everything?” Dexter shouted at Jared and pointed at the park from inside the car. “I’m the one who should be nervous. In a matter of a few minutes right at sunset, I’ll be out there with the damn dancers, trying not to puke as I dance with Isaac and ignoring billions of New Yorkers who will be staring at me while I propose to my boyfriend.”

  Jared rolled his eyes. “Dex, come on. Don’t be dramatic. There may be a maximum of a hundred or maybe a hundred and fifty people at Pelham Bay Park to witness you making a fool of yourself, but it will be worth it. You and Isaac will be that much closer to becoming husbands.”

  Dexter sighed. “You’re right. Oh, by the way, you and Steve owe me nearly five hundred million dollars for the purchase of that damn house you both like so much.”

  “I know, man. Thanks for that. I started panicking last week when Steve made that counter offer for the house. It’s supposed to be my surprise gift for him.”

  Dexter chuckled. “Lucky for you, I managed to get to your agent’s husband first and secure the deal. Otherwise, Steve and I would have ended up bidding against each other, and that would be foolish, considering the fact that I’m actually buying the house for him on your behalf.”

  Jared chortled. “I know, right?”

  “Have you told him about it?”

  Jared shook his head. “Not yet. I’ll do it right after this.”

  “Are you going to propose to him, as well?”

  Jared snorted. “Too soon, man.”

  “Not really. Think about it. The three of us have been best friends for decades now. We know one another really well. You and Steve will be two best friends getting married with each other.”

  “True, but I still feel that it’s best to wait for a little bit longer.”

  “Up to you, buddy.”

  Jared nodded before glancing at the time on his smartphone. Then he directed his gaze toward the agreed-upon meeting spot. He noticed Stephen and Isaac walking and laughing with each other. It was Stephen’s duty to fetch Isaac from his community college and to make sure the younger man got there at the right moment. Jared slapped Dexter’s thigh. Hard.

  “They’re here, man. Come on. It’s showtime.”

  Dexter visibly gulped. “Okay. I can do this.”

  “Absolutely. You will just look very stupid slow-dancing with Isaac out there in the park along with all the professional dancers, but your man will appreciate the effort.”

  Dexter glared at Jared. “If that’s your way of encouraging me—”

  “Yes, it is.”

  “You fucking suck.”

  “And I’m damn good at it, too.”

  Dexter scowled at Jared, but he didn’t utter a single word. As they got out from the car, Jared noticed several violinists had already gathered together and started playing their instruments. Isaac had such a flabbergasted expression on his face, Jared frankly thought it was comical. However, it was nothing compared to Dexter’s current terrified and determined expression. Jared shoved Dexter in Isaac’s direction. Then he held his amusement back when he heard Dexter stuttering at Isaac. Apparently, Isaac understood what Dexter was talking about because the younger man simply nodded. Jared snickered softly when Dexter and Isaac began to waltz around next to all the professional dancers. Needless to say, the professional dancers were amazing. Dexter and Isaac weren’t horrible, but they were definitely not in the same league as the professional dancers. Nevertheless, Isaac seemed positively elated, and Dexter stared at Isaac as if he was the most gorgeous human to ever grace this earth. It was almost enough to make Jared shed a tear or two. Almost.

  “They’re both so happy and in love, I think I may end up vomiting rainbows and unicorns.”

  Jared turned toward Stephen, who was now standing next to him. He slung one arm over Stephen’s shoulders and pulled his boyfriend closer toward him.

  “Hey, babe. I know what you mean, but our joy will be greater than theirs someday when I propose to you.”

  Stephen snorted. “I may change my mind. I may not want to marry you at all
.”

  Jared was taken aback upon hearing that, but then he noticed the pleased expression on Stephen’s face. “Are you sure about that?”

  “Yeah.”

  Jared was a little annoyed now. “I’m quite the catch, you know?”

  “So?”

  “I’m handsome, rich, and I have a really huge—”

  “Ego?” Stephen cut Jared off midsentence while the two of them continued to watch Dexter and Isaac twirling around slowly and gently in each other’s arms.

  “No! You know what I’m talking about.”

  “Not at all.”

  Jared narrowed his eyes at Stephen for a brief moment before he folded his arms over his chest and pouted. “I don’t care. You’re mine, and I’m yours. You’re stuck with me. You’ll have to marry me. You don’t have a choice.”

  Stephen burst out laughing while he leaned his head against Jared’s. Then he raised his left hand slightly higher.

  “Maybe you need to put a ring on my finger.”

  Jared abruptly smirked at Stephen. “What about a cock ring on—”

  “Do that, and I’ll kick your ass. That’s so not romantic.”

  Jared chortled as he tightened his arm around Stephen. “I’m just teasing you, babe. I’ll get you a beautiful ring someday. Then again, I may not be able to find a ring that’s pretty enough.”

  Stephen glanced sideways at Jared. “Why not?”

  “Because there’s no ring, or anything and anyone in this world for that matter, who can look half as good as you are.”

  Stephen blushed redder than a tomato. “You’re a lying flirt.”

  “It’s the truth,” Jared whispered into Stephen’s ear.

  “Whatever. Stop it already. I’m feeling so shy now.”

  Jared let out a loud guffaw, but he complied anyway. Then his focus shifted onto Isaac and Dexter when the music came to an end. It was really quiet at the park now. There were many people in the audience, and everyone was taking photographs or video clips. He heard some people gasping when Dexter got down on one knee in front of Isaac. He also checked to make sure that the professional cameraman Dexter had hired specifically for this event was doing his job and recording everything. After that, he returned his attention onto Dexter and Isaac.