by Shawn Wall
"Interesting, I didn't know I was that easy to read."
He had aroused her curiosity. Suzanne was shocked he could know this about her. She couldn't tell him the deep dark secrets. She didn't know if she would ever be able to reveal them. No one could ever see the empty, black hole inside her. She thought she hid the depths of her despair pretty well. Tray was a very intuitive person. Her secrets would scare him to be sure, and she didn't think he would understand. No one could truly understand.
"It's getting late. Do you want me to take you back?”
She sighed wearily, and clutched her hands together in her lap. “Please not yet?” When the numbness began to subside, she knew the numerous drinks were beginning to wear off. She didn’t want to be alone. Alone she could think, and she didn’t want to think.
He cupped her face in his hands. “Just tell me what you need.”
“Another drink, and then to stay here with your arms around me as long as we can.”
A single tear fell across her cheek as she looked into his eyes. Then, he cradled her in his arms and rocked her gently. They didn’t speak. They only stared into the dying fire for hours before he drove her back.
Chapter Three
Maybe he’s just decided to stand me up. She checked her messages. His text was clear.
MEET AT 2:00 pm, HARROD HALL PARKING AREA.
He had even reminded her after Comp. She’d only wait another five minutes. She wouldn’t be his fool. Suddenly, a loud roaring sound came from a black motorcycle pulling up beside her.
“I thought you changed your mind.”
“Sorry to keep you waiting, your majesty.” Seth smirked.
She stomped toward her car. “Let’s get this over with.”
“You want to take my bike?” He motioned toward the black hog.
“We can just follow each other.” She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of having her arms wrapped around him after that comment.
“That doesn’t make any sense. We should just take one vehicle.”
“We can take my car, I guess.”
Walker Creek was out of Magnolia in a rural community about twenty-five minutes away but still in Columbia County per Professor Jones specifications.
“I like your Mustang. How long have you had it?” He was attempting polite conversation. It must be killing him.
“Almost three years. It was my sixteenth birthday present from my grandmother.”
“You’re lucky. This is a sixty-six, right?”
“That’s right.”
“I just mean this is collector’s item. A lot of people have to work for their first car.” He smiled and rested his left arm across the back of her seat.
“I know I’m lucky. My mom and grandmother help me a little, but essentially I’m on my own now. I don’t know what I would do if I had a car payment.” She clicked on the stereo. Her iPod was still set on the Steve Miller Band’s greatest hits.
He stretched his long legs into the floorboard and tilted his head toward her. “You really are into classic rock.”
“Do you mind? We can listen to something else.”
“It’s fine. I really like ‘The Joker.’”
They neared the creeks’ public area, and she parked by an embankment. She was glad they had driven her car after all. During the drive over, clouds had filled the sky, and it looked like it might rain.
“Do you have the specimen cup? I’ll go down to the water’s edge since it’s so steep and muddy.”
She watched him carefully ease down to the water. He filled the cup and began to walk back. The wind suddenly began to whip her hair and sprinkles began to fall on her cheeks. Loud thunder rolled, and lightning struck in the nearby woods behind them.
He rushed back up the embankment. “Suzanne, we need to get out of here.”
“I think you’re right. Let’s head back to school before this hits.”
“There’s no time. We need to find shelter now.”
“We’re in the country. There’s nothing around here.”
“I remember us passing a cinderblock building a mile back. It looked like an old county well-house.”
“Let’s just go back to campus. If we hurry, we’ll have time.”
“Please listen to me.” His eyes were intense as he ran around to the driver’s side of her car. “Just get in.”
Something in his voice startled her. She quickly obeyed and sat in the passenger seat. Immediately, Seth cranked her car and headed back down the farm road. He was right. A small, cinderblock shed was a mile up the road on the right. She hadn’t noticed it on the drive up. Now, the wind was stronger with the rain shifting sideways, as Seth clutched the steering wheel, trying to keep the car on the road. He parked as close to the shed as possible.
“Let’s hope the door isn’t locked.” Seth jumped out of the car and ran to check the shed door.
He had it opened quickly and motioned for her to come. She shook her head. She didn’t know why they couldn’t drive back toward campus. She certainly didn’t want to go in that dirty building. Seth ran back, got in the car, and took her face between both of his hands.
“Listen to me. I know we don’t know one another very well, but I need you to trust me. It’s not safe. We have to take shelter. We won’t make it back to school. This is our only option.” His eyes widened, and his lips pressed firmly together.
She froze then spoke with a quivering gulp. “Okay.”
They ran to the tiny building, only eight-by-eight-feet, with the only light emanating from a tiny window on the far wall. The floor was concrete, with two large pipes in the center running into the ground. It was dusty with cobwebs in every corner but completely dry. The ten foot run from the car had left her soaked, and she wrung her hair out, wishing she hadn’t left her jacket in her room.
“You need to take off that wet top. You’re soaking wet.”
She shook her head and swallowed hard. “What? I’m not going to take off my sweater.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. You can wear my shirt. My leather jacket kept me dry.” His eyebrows shot high as he rolled his eyes.
“I don’t want to take yours. What will you wear?”
“I’ll be fine. It’s dry in here, and I have the jacket. Don’t be so stubborn. You’ll catch a cold.” He smirked.
She began to shiver, and she knew he was right. With one glance, he began unbuttoning his shirt, and she hesitantly pulled her sweater over her head, wishing she had worn a camisole or undershirt. Her white, underwire bra was silk and lace. It was soaked through just like her sweater and left nothing to the imagination. In response, he stared without blinking, swallowing hard while she buttoned his shirt, unhooked her bra, and slipped it off through one of the sleeves. In turn, her eyes never left his tan, chiseled chest as they sat quietly listening to the storm.
When the thunder and lightning stopped, the loud winds calmed. They could faintly hear a siren calling from a distance. It was the nearest town’s tornado warning. Suzanne could feel her heart beating in her throat, and terror must have crossed her face. Seth must have sensed her feelings, and he scooted over, pulling her into his lap. She was a rag doll and submitted completely. He leaned her head against his bare chest and covered them both with his jacket. She didn’t say a word as she nestled against him, basking in his warmth. Then, he tucked her closer and wrapped both his arms around her.
“We’re going to be fine here in this tiny matchbox. We are perfectly safe.” His voice was soothing and compassionate. She believed every word.
They sat in silence, listening to the storm ravage the terrain as the sirens continued roaring outside the shed. Then, the heavy rain came again, which was deafening on the tin roof. Closing her eyes, she listened to the rhythm of his heartbeat, and in spite of the storm she could hear nothing else. As she breathed deeply, a distinct scent intoxicated her senses. It was a delicious scent that was all male and only Seth. And they didn’t move for what seemed a couple of hours until the storm had completely p
assed.
“I think it’s safe to go back now. Are you all right?” He still hadn’t released her.
“I’m fine just glad we were together. You saved us. How did you know?”
“It just looked like a bad storm.” He glanced away.
“I guess I should change back into my sweater.”
“No, you wear my shirt. Just bring it to class one day.”
She was glad to see her car still intact. Tree limbs and pine needles had covered the roads, and a few trees were in ditches. An awkward silence surrounded them as he drove them back toward campus. She stared out the window, forcing herself to turn away from him. He’d shown so little reaction to holding her in his arms. She’d thought perhaps he had harbored some feelings for her, but after today her assumptions were wrong. Choking back a tear, she glanced his way. His jaw was fixed as he focused on the road. Somehow, I’ll put today behind me and focus on Tray.
* * * *
Thursday, she arrived at work early. Waiting to clock in, she couldn’t stop smiling. Tray did boost her confidence and make her feel good about herself. She wished she could be totally honest with him, but that just wasn’t possible. He knew she had a secret and just accepted it, never asking any questions. He seemed satisfied just to go out with her. She began her shift as usual, first filling all the pitchers in each patient’s room with fresh ice and water. The nurses usually had several errands for her, and today was no different. She delivered a urine specimen to the lab and picked up some charts from medical records.
“Why are you smiling today?” Betty asked.
“I can’t be happy and enjoy my work?”
“Not without telling me why. It’s a guy, isn’t it?” she asked.
Suzanne grinned widely. She just couldn’t help it.
Betty let out a high pitched squeal. “Okay, we’re taking our lunch break early. I want to know all the details. I’ll meet you in the break room in ten.” Suzanne didn’t have the extra money to eat out, so there was no choice but to bring her lunch most nights. Tonight’s dinner was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and free milk from the nurse’s station. It wasn’t filet mignon, but it was cheap. Betty burst through the door, smiling wider than ever. She was divorced and had never had any children. She had taken Suzanne under her wing and seemed to enjoy the most boring stories she would tell her.
“You know you should get out more.” Suzanne laughed.
“Find me a rich sugar daddy that will let me quit my job, and I will.”
“You find me one, and I won’t have to eat anymore peanut butter sandwiches.”
They laughed together.
“Okay, I want the scoop, Suzanne. Who is he?”
“He’s in my Comp class.”
“The Greek god?” She remembered Suzanne’s analogy of Seth.
“No, the Greek god doesn’t even know I exist. It’s another boy. He’s a football player and very cute and sweet.” Suzanne couldn’t stop grinning.
“Has he kissed you?” Betty was sitting on the edge of her seat.
“Yes.” How many details did she really want?
“Does he have strong lips?” Her eyes were wide.
“Well, yes.” Suzanne couldn’t help but laugh. “Now I know you need to get out more.”
“Your stories are the only enchantment I have.”
Suzanne shook her head and bit her bottom lip. “I do have a problem, though. I’m still thinking about the Greek god.”
“Is this more than just a crush? For the Greek god I mean.”
“His name is Seth. Maybe, yes probably. But he’s not interested, and this thing with Tray could turn into a real relationship. I’m sure of it. Tray already adores me.”
“I can’t tell you what to do. You will have to search your heart to find the answer. To be with Tray, you're going to have to get over this other guy, or the relationship won’t have a chance.”
“That’s what I was afraid of.”
“Well, Miss Candy Striper, what are you going to do?”
Suzanne could only shrug. She had no clue. There was no sense in thinking about Seth. That was a dead end. Even during that tornado, she was in the most vulnerable position possible. It would have been a perfect opportunity for him to make a move. She must have been the only one fantasizing that afternoon. Things were different with Tray. She could have something real with him. After all, they were two consenting adults knowing exactly what they are getting into. It wasn’t the same as with Dwight.
The following Saturday was an out-of-state game that took Tray away for the entire weekend. She saw him again on Monday, and he asked if they could go to a party after the Homecoming game. She had gladly accepted, and the whole week they were together every day, hanging in the courtyard and eating lunch. Like usual, they were supposed to go out on Friday too, but Tray got a call from his father. He needed him to stay with his mom for the night. Honestly, she was glad he didn't ask her to go. She wasn’t ready to meet his parents. After all it was far too early for her to know if this was going to turn into anything truly lasting. Finally, Homecoming had arrived, and she sat at the game with a few girls she had met at the last party. The Muleriders won again but only by three points.
Suzanne was sure the Homecoming celebration would be a bigger party than the last. Tray had asked her to meet him by his car this time. Of course, she knew after the past week and the time they had spent together, tonight would be pivotal for their relationship, the determining factor whether they would be a couple or not. Certainly Tray had not been subtle about his feelings. It would be Suzanne who would make the final decision, and at this point, she still didn’t know the answer. As she crossed the parking lot, she saw him leaning against his car.
"Hey."
"You look really nice tonight.” His chocolate brown eyes had a twinkle and energy she’d never noticed before.
Then, she felt an ache for what was between them to move faster. When she was with him, she forgot about the past and sometimes didn’t even need to get wasted to accomplish it. He stood straight and retrieved his keys from his pocket. She approached him and pushed him back against the window, took his hands, and wrapped them around her waist. She opened his legs with her foot and pressed herself against his chest as firm as she could. Then, she ran her hands from his shoulders to his neck and through his hair, tiptoed up, and kissed him passionately. His eyes widened in shock having never seen her be quite so aggressive. He quickly responded to her kiss, and they didn't change positions for several minutes.
"Hmm,” he said then he pressed his lips together.
She tossed her hair and leaned to whisper in his ear. "I thought I’d make my intentions known.”
"Message received, crystal clear.” He grinned.
He walked her to the passenger door, opening it for her as always.
"So where are we going?"
"The party is at the quarterback’s parents’ house.”
"Is it in town?"
"Out in the country a ways but…" He hesitated. "I think it could be a little rough. I want you to stay close to me."
"I don't have a problem with that."
He drove about ten minutes on Highway 82 East and pulled down a long driveway. There were twice as many cars at this party at a house on a hill that looked like a mansion. It was well-lighted outside, and every window glowed. As Tray took her hand, they could hear music blaring and people laughing and yelling. Of course, the house was grander on the inside with a winding staircase and marble floors. In fact, Suzanne thought it was insane for someone to actually allow crazy, drunk college kids free rein of a house like this, if even for a night. These people must have more money than they knew what to do with.
When they walked through the first sitting room, they saw a couple, obviously drunk, dancing in their underwear. This party had already gotten a little wild, and she could sense it made Tray uneasy. He quickly put his arm around her and pulled her to his side. Walking from room to room, each more beautiful than the l
ast, they finally found the kitchen. Blenders lined the counters filled with every mixed drink imaginable, while a group of kids pretended to be bartenders. Tray took a beer, but Suzanne opted for a strawberry daiquiri. Then, he led her through a pair of French doors to a patio. Several of his friends were seated around a table, and there was only one open chair. Tray sat down, and she immediately sat in his lap.
She definitely felt too comfortable with him as she melted in his arms. When someone brought a pitcher to the table, serving screwdrivers, she couldn't resist. At this moment, it felt more than nice sitting with Tray, leaning her head on his shoulder. They barely spoke to one another as he and his friends dissected the night’s game. Reclining back, he shifted her hips and brought her closer to him. Whatever this was between them was easy. She felt free and a small bit of happiness, even in these short weeks. For these few hours, she only thought of Tray. Eventually, the party came to an end, and people were beginning to leave or taking rooms upstairs.
"Maybe we should go.”
"We can leave, but I really don't feel like going back to the dorms," she said shyly.
"Well." He bit his lip. "My house is about twenty minutes farther up the highway. My parents went out of town for the night."
"Okay."
She had not stood since the last two screwdrivers, and she felt light-headed.
"I don't know if I can walk.”
"I'll carry you if I need to." He grinned.
When she stood, she stumbled, so Tray held her close to him as they slowly walked to his car. As expected, he had to lift her into the passenger seat, and they drove no more than twenty minutes away just as he said. His house was on the outskirts of town, alone on a hill, with a long driveway leading from the highway. It was a one level brick and the yard and house were very dark. By now, she could almost walk on her own and only needed him to steady her as they made their way inside. In spite of outer appearances the rooms were big, and very homey. Surprisingly, a sense of intimacy came over her, knowing this had been his home since he was just a young boy.
"Do you want something to drink,” he asked in a nervous tone.