Stepbrother Untouchable

by Masters, Colleen

  “The envelopes. I wanted to double check because you've seemed so distracted lately, and they're quite important.”

  I frown at him. What the hell? “You didn’t ask me to messenger anything today, Pierce.”

  “Brynn,” he sighs in a patronizing way, setting down his champagne glass.

  “You didn't!” I reply, a little more defensively than I mean to. I glance at Nate and see him raising his eyebrows at me.

  “You know that I did. And it's not like this is the first time this has happened,” Pierce counters.

  “Maybe we should—” my mom breaks in.

  “Wait, no,” I say to her, holding up my hand. “I honestly don't know what you're talking about Pierce.”

  “Well, this clearly isn't the time to discuss it, but since you're pressing me, I've heard from some of your immediate superiors that you haven't been very responsible.”

  “What? Like who? When?”

  “Obviously I can't give you exact dates, and I need to protect their anonymity—”

  “Wow. Wow,” I snap, tossing down my napkin. “You are just making all this up, aren't you?”

  “Brynn, calm down,” Nate murmurs from across the table.

  “Calm down? Seriously? He's lying!”

  “He has no reason to—” Nate argues.

  “He damn well does. He called me into his office today and unzipped my dress, and I told him to back off, and now he's pissed.”

  “You know that's because I was worried about those bruises on your neck, Brynn. Don't get hysterical.”

  “You're a liar,” I whisper.

  He slams his hand down on the table, causing me to jump. “I will not be spoken to that way in my own house!”

  I glance back and forth at my mom and Nate, speechless. Are they really just going to sit there staring at me? I stand up so abruptly that my chair almost falls over backward. I can't take being surrounded by this bullshit anymore. I walk quickly around the table and then out the front door, clenching my fists to try to contain my anger until I'm outside.

  As I close the door behind me, I pick up my pace, walking straight down the driveway and out of the gates. The woods rise up quiet and dark around me as tears of frustration and humiliation begin to stream down my face. I don't know where I'm going—I just need to get away from that house.

  “Hey! Wait!” I hear a woman's voice call out behind me, but I keep walking. “You're Brynn, right?”

  I freeze and take a deep breath before turning around. “Look, if you're a reporter or something, I'm really not in the mood.” I can just see her blonde hair reflect the moonlight as she takes a couple steps closer.

  “I'm not a reporter. I'm Nate's mom, Eileen.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  “Are…are you alright?” she asks, taking another step toward me.

  “I'm, I'm just—” I break off as a sob escapes my lips. “I'm sorry.”

  “It's alright. I've got some tissues in my car—why don’t you come sit down for a moment.”

  I nod. In a saner moment, I might have questioned the safety of getting into a strange woman's car, but this is not a sane moment. She wraps her arm around my shoulders and leads me to the passenger side of her blue sedan, parked just down the street from the gates of the house. She sits me down then hurries around to the driver's side and gets in.

  “Here you go,” she says, pulling a box of tissues from the floor of the back seat.

  “Thanks,” I murmur rather incoherently. She flips on the car's overhead light. “Oh!” I exclaim. “You're the woman from the boathouse parking lot.”

  She smiles wryly. “I thought you saw me that day. I'm not a stalker or anything. It's just, sometimes I like to get a glimpse of him, that's all. See what he looks like, how he's doing.”

  “I understand.”

  “But what's happened to you? Is there anything I can do?”

  “It's Pierce,” I murmur as more tears fall from my eyes at the mention of his name.

  “What'd he do now?”

  “He…he made a pass at me at work. I mean, I actually wasn't sure that's what it was right after, but then tonight he got on my case about something I didn't even do, and that's when I knew for sure.”

  “Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry,” she says, rubbing my shoulder. “Pierce has a serious case of entitlement. He thinks that anything with a vagina is fair game, even his stepdaughter, it seems.”

  “I mean, I already knew he was an asshole from the way he treats Nate, but I just hadn't felt it directed at me yet.”

  She stills. “He doesn't treat Nate well?” she asks quietly.

  “Oh, oh, I'm sorry,” I reply, looking at her through bleary eyes. “He's…he's very hard on Nate. He calls him entitled, selfish, when I think those are really things he knows deep down are true about himself.”

  “My little Nate,” she murmurs to herself.

  “But he's really…Nate is a good person, you should know that. Well, to be honest, at first I thought he was more like Pierce, but that's just a cover. Maybe it's that half his genes are yours, or maybe his father raised him to be a better person than he is himself, I don't know. But he's smart, funny, hardworking…”

  “Thank you,” she says, taking my hand. “I'm sorry you have to go through this. Did you tell your mom?”

  “She found out at dinner, but…” I shake my head. “She's completely under Pierce's spell. She gets like that about men, but I've never seen her quite so enamored of one before him. She looks a lot like you, actually,” I realize, studying her beautiful, slightly lined face.

  “Pierce certainly has a type,” she says with a sad smile.

  “There's another thing you should know…about Nate…I found out after you called: he thinks you left because he was too much for you, because he was a bad kid, basically. I tried to talk to him about it, really, but he wouldn't hear it.”

  “Nate was a wonderful child, and even if he'd been the devil incarnate, I still wouldn't have left him.”

  “Yeah, I figured as much. He said that the night before you left, you and Pierce had a big fight over him, because he misbehaved, and that's why you left the next day.”

  “Oh, god,” she murmurs, covering her face in her hands. “He must have felt so alone, so responsible. No…I remember that fight, because it was our last. We'd been to some big gala that night, and we'd seen this woman there who was in our circle at the time. I knew he'd cheated before, but he promised me he'd stopped, and then at this party, I could just tell by the way they looked at each other that they were sleeping together. I confronted him about it at home, and he barely even bothered to deny it. I was yelling at him, asking what kind of example he was setting for his son. I left…I never thought that would be one of the last times I'd see Nate. I never thought that was even a possibility.”

  “I want to help you,” I say suddenly.

  “What? No. You have too much going on already,” Eileen says, shaking her head emphatically.

  “No, I want to. Not just for you, either. For Nate. He needs you in his life. I can tell that you're good, and kind, and he needs people like that to love him. Please let me help you.”

  “I don't want to put you in a position…I don't want to jeopardize anything. You and Nate, you have a special relationship.”

  “Um, sure, yeah, he's a great guy,” I hedge.

  “Brynn…it's OK. I know.”

  I swallow. “Know what?”

  “When I saw you that day at the boathouse, I could just tell. At first I thought you were his girlfriend, and then I realized who you were, and I saw the way you two looked at each other. You're in love,” she whispers. I begin to tug at my hair nervously. Shit. Shit. “You've acted on your feelings?” It's all I can do to nod. “Do your parents know?” I shake my head. “Brynn, you don't have to be embarrassed. Life's messy. People find love wherever they can. Hell, it's not like you're breaking any laws.”

  My tears begin to slip down my face again, renewed. “I can't believe i
t's so obvious.”

  “Maybe I just caught you two in an unguarded moment. But, see, if Nate and you are together, I don't want to come between you.”

  “Honestly, I'd like him to meet you. I think it might do him some good. When Pierce was chewing me out tonight, he didn't say anything.”

  “I'm sorry.”

  “So you'll meet with him?”

  “If you're sure it's OK with you.”

  “I'm not sure how I'll set it up yet, but write down your number for me, and I'll get in touch with you when I know.”

  She nods and tears a slip of paper from a paperback book in the back seat. As she hands it to me and I get out of the car, she leans over into the passenger seat.

  “Brynn, if I could just give you a little advice…I would avoid Pierce for the next few days. He doesn't like it when people stand up to him.”

  I nod and shut the door, walking slowly back to the house as I run my fingers over her phone number. I peer cautiously through the first floor windows, not wanting to walk back in on dinner, but it looks like they’ve finished and the plates have all been cleared. I quietly open the front door and tiptoe up the stairs to my bedroom, locking my door behind me. I put Eileen's phone number on my bureau and am just about to change out of my dress when I hear a soft knock on the door. Usually Nate just comes in now, so he clearly knows that I'm upset with him. I walk over and unlock it, then open it a few inches.

  “You locked it?” he asks, looking hurt.

  “I want to be alone right now,” I murmur, though a knot forms in my throat at the thought of spending the first night in a week without him.

  “I…I can't choose between you,” he whispers. He looks so forlorn, and I see a glimpse of the little boy that he once was, overhearing his parents' arguments.

  “I know.”

  “They're going to some charity lunch tomorrow afternoon…maybe we could spend some time together.”

  “OK,” I nod, my mind already moving in a different direction.

  He pauses, unsure if he should kiss me. “Alright, goodnight,” he says, and walks down the hallway to his bedroom.

  I close and lock the door after him, then grab my cell phone and put in Eileen's number. Tomorrow afternoon, I text her. I'll let you know when my parents are gone, and then you come meet Nate.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  I yawn as I sit by my window, waiting for the sounds of my mom and Pierce leaving. I wasn't able to sleep well at all last night. There were too many worries rattling around in my brain. Mainly, though, it felt strange not to see Nate. I missed his presence in my bed with a physical ache that gnawed away at me.

  Finally I hear some movement in the rest of the house. I walk to my door and crack it open, sticking my head out into the hall. I can just hear my mom murmuring something to Pierce as they make their way to the garage. Soon I hear the car pulling out of the driveway and I glance at the clock. I'll give them ten minutes.

  I wait impatiently, and as soon as it's up, I text Eileen and head down to the foyer. Luckily Nate has been safely ensconced in his room all morning. I don't know if he even got up to train this morning, which is highly unusual for him. I glance out the window next to the door and see Eileen walking up the driveway.

  “Hi,” I murmur quietly as she reaches the steps and I open the door.

  “Hi,” she replies nervously, smoothing her blouse. “Do I look alright?”

  “You look fine,” I assure her. I can't imagine how she must feel, finally seeing her son face-to-face after all these years. She looks around the foyer.

  “God, this place is even bigger than it looks from outside.”

  “I know. It's ridiculous,” I agree, and usher her into the den. “Pierce and my mom are at some charity lunch, so they'll be gone for a while,” I tell her. She bites her lip nervously and takes a seat on the couch. “I'll call Nate down, alright? I haven't told him anything…I wasn't sure he would come otherwise.” She nods, and I head to the stairs. “Hey, Nate?” I yell, and hear his bedroom door open. “You wanna come down to the den?”

  I feel a fissure of guilt as he replies happily, “Sure! Be right there,” and I hear him moving around. I don't like the idea of setting a trap and lying to him, but I rationalize that it's in the service of a greater truth, that of the true nature of his parents' relationship, and his father's character.

  I walk back into the den, and stand nervously next to the couch where Eileen's sitting. She stands as we hear Nate walking down the stairs, and then he turns the corner and sees us. His face is a blank as he surveys the scene before him. He takes a step forward, looks like he's going to say something, and then steps back.

  “Nate, it's me, your mom,” Eileen whispers.

  “I know who you are,” Nate replies quietly. He turns to me. “You did this?”

  “I think you should hear what she has to say. Please, will you just sit for a minute?”

  Nate's face twists into a sneer—an expression I haven't seen in weeks. “You're unbelievable,” he spits at me, and storms out the front door, slamming it behind him. Eileen sits down with a muted cry, and I run after him.

  “Nate!” I call as I shut the door behind me and head down the front steps. He's walking around the side of the house, probably headed for the garage and his car to make an escape. “Would you just listen to me for a second?”

  “Why? So you can try to poison my mind against my dad some more?” he yells, reeling around.

  “I'm trying to tell you the truth about him! Eileen can tell you—”

  “Oh, so this is all about you! You can try to paint it as some benevolent way of getting a mother and son to reunite, but really, this is all about getting me to believe your story,” he turns again and begins to walk away across the grass.

  “No! That's not true!” I protest, pursuing him. “Your mom is a good person—I wanted to help her, and you.”

  “You're pathetic, you know that?” he says, spinning around again. “Stop following me. Whatever mistakes we made together this summer, it's over.”

  “What? Nate, I—” I feel like he just punched me in the gut. How did this all go so wrong?

  “I thought maybe you were different than all the other girls I've fucked, but you're not, OK? From now on, let's just smile at each other politely from across the room at family events, like normal stepsiblings do.”

  “No, no! We are different, we are.”

  “You're just attached because I was your first. Don't worry about it, you'll get over it soon. You were nothing special to me, Brynn,” he says and walks through the garage's side door. I stand in shock as I watch the garage door slide open and his Wrangler come speeding out. I watch him head down the driveway, then disappear around the corner.

  I hear the front door open behind me, and Eileen approach me. “I'm so sorry, Brynn, this is all my fault.”

  “No, it's not,” I reply, biting my lip to keep from sobbing.

  She puts her arm around me. “He's just angry. He'll come to his senses.”

  “No, he's just as stubborn as I am. It's really over.” I collapse against her, burying my head on her shoulder as I begin to cry.

  “First love always hits the hardest,” she murmurs as she rubs my arm. “Come on—your parents won't be back for a while. I'll make you some tea.”

  After Eileen leaves and I've hidden away in my room, I can't help but marvel at her kindness. It's been a long time since my own mother has taken care of me and comforted me the way she did, even though the afternoon might have gone even worse for her than it did for me. She told me that she's learned not to get her hopes up for a reunion over the years, though it does still hurt.

  I keep picturing the anger on Nate's face as he ended our romantic relationship. I could tell he really meant the things he was saying. My body aches at the thought that I won't get to touch him again, and feel him against me. Already I feel like it's been ages since I've seen him.

  I hear my mom and Pierce come home in the late aftern
oon, and I glance at my locked door. I don't want to see them now, or anytime soon, for that matter. I think of how Nate begins to resemble his father when he gets angry, but his mother in his kindness. Even though she was only in his life until he was eight or nine, she must have had some influence on him in those early years, in addition to whatever good traits she passed down to him genetically. I suppose I wanted to tip the scales in her direction, to make sure that Nate keeps listening to the side of himself that his mother has passed on to him. But clearly, I don't have the power to make such a thing happen.

  Mistake. He referred to what happened between us as a mistake. My body curls around myself as though I've just been punched in the gut. I can feel the pain reverberating in my bones. I thought maybe you were different than all the other girls I've fucked, but you're not. You're nothing special to me, Brynn. His words keep echoing around in my head, and I can't make them go away. I don't know if I've ever felt so completely hollow before.

  Eventually, I fall asleep, my body finally giving in to the exhaustion I feel. When I wake up, it's almost ten at night. My mom didn't even try to wake me for dinner, I realize. I feel a surge of anger against her. Mothers are supposed to protect their children, but of course she's taking Pierce's side. She thinks he's some kind of savior, rescuing her and her abandoned daughter from some lonely life. I want to scream. I want her to be stronger, to be there for me like I've been there for her countless times. But I know my anger is useless; I've long ago realized that I can't change her, can't expect her to be any different from the way that she is.

  My stomach grumbles, reminding me that I've skipped a meal or two today. I don't even feel like eating, but I know that I'll never be able to get to sleep again tonight without a little something in my stomach. I sigh and get out of bed and head over to my bureau, pulling a sweatshirt on over my t-shirt. I cautiously open my door and listen. I think I can just hear the sounds of the TV from my mom and Pierce's room. Should be safe, then. I tiptoe down the hallway, pausing at the open door to Nate's dark room. Still out, I guess. Probably drinking somewhere.