Underwater

by Doe, Anna B.

  The mop of hair on his head is growing thinner by the day and is almost completely white, but his dark brown eyes still hold the sharpness of a shark. He was never overly tall, a result of his Hawaiian heritage, and with age he gained a few extra pounds, but he’s still my tutu.

  My grandpa.

  Since I was a little girl we’ve shared a special connection. Some may say it’s because I’m his only granddaughter, but it’s more than that. We’re connected on a deeper level than blood. We share a love of nature and everything marine. Tutu has been working on the boat all his life, and even when he retired, he and Grandma chose this place close to the ocean so he’d never be far from it.

  “How are you holding up, Tutu?” I ask him as he ushers me to sit in one of the rocking chairs.

  He and Grandma bought these when he retired. Grandma always complained that he worked too hard, and she just wanted them to sit there on the front porch of their little cottage house and watch the sun rise and set together. They didn’t get many years of peacefulness because life took her soon after they bought those chairs.

  “Good, good…” He pours us both a glass of lemonade before he sits down in his own chair. I see him frown in discomfort and make a note to tell Mom about it. Maybe he should see a doctor. “I’ve been fishing lately. Also, your grandma’s hibiscus needed some extra attention this week. You know how much she loved that damn flower.”

  His voice is all grumbly, like a sleeping bear, but I see the softness in his dark eyes.

  “Yeah, she did.” I smile gently remembering how Grandma and I would pick hibiscus flowers to braid into haku-lei. Flower crowns for the little princess. “Maybe I’ll go behind the house and pick some before I go home to put them in the vase in my room.”

  Tutu nods his head in agreement. “She’d like that, ke aloha.”

  Comfortable silence stretches between us as we rock in the chairs looking at the ocean. But unanswered questions roaming in my mind, questions that brought me here in the first place, don’t let me rest.

  “Grandpa?” I lean forward in my chair, nervously wetting my suddenly dry lips.

  Dark eyes take me in. He may be old, but he’s not dumb. Tutu knows me better than anybody else. Sitting straighter in the chair, he folds his hands in his lap. “What is it, Marissa?”

  I nibble at my lower lip, but decide to go for it. There is no better person who could help me. Tutu spent most of his life at the ocean. He’s seen it all. The good, the bad and the ugly. If he can’t help me, no one can.

  “Do you remember the stories you told me when I was a little girl?” I tilt my head to the side, carefully looking for his reaction.

  He nods his head, but his expression doesn’t reveal a thing.

  “The stories about the…” I gulp down hard. “About mermaids?”

  If only slightly, his eyes narrow at me. “What about them?”

  “Are they…” Frankly, I don’t know how to put it so I don’t alert his suspicious nature.

  Are they real?

  Are they true?

  Do mermaids really exist?

  And if they do, how did they manage to remain just a tale for so long?

  Thankfully he doesn’t wait for me to finish my question. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he shakes his head in distress.

  I don’t like it one bit.

  “Mermaids are really dangerous creatures, Marissa. You’ve heard the stories, and I’m not talking about the Little Mermaid. Mermaids are predators, just like most of the sea creatures. But unlike them, they have their own agendas. They hunt down the lonely sailors and seaman. They’re extremely beautiful, but they’re also cunning. They only think about one thing―their personal gain, and they’ll do whatever it takes to get what they want.”

  A cold sweat washes over me.

  “What do they want?”

  “To walk this Earth.” His long, hard stare makes the fine hair at the nape of my neck rise to attention. “They want to become human, Marissa.”

  This is actually nothing new to me. I’ve heard all the stories. Tutu was a sailor, and our island is filled with folk tales as old as time. But this time, I see them as something more than just stories.

  The tales I’ve been hearing all my life are real, and I’m afraid to find out how deep the reality goes.

  Are there more of them? Will she come back for me along with her friends? What’s really hidden beneath the azure surface? How many more secrets are there?

  “What if a mermaid… offers somebody help?” I ask tentatively.

  Tutu looks at me for a second before he bursts into laughter. Only there is nothing amusing about it, which makes my stomach sink even further. I’m afraid of his next words, and I should be.

  “Mermaids don’t help. They bargain. The only question is, what is on the line?”

  Marissa

  “Shouldn’t you be helping your mom at the café today?” Noel raises her brow in question.

  She’s the only person I know who can pull it off. If it weren’t for her, I would bet it was something invented in books and movies.

  “I helped her stock and tended the bar while she was preparing some new pastries, but she said it’s okay if I wanted to go and take a swim.”

  When I got home, I texted Noel to see if she wanted to go to the beach. Tutu’s words had shaken me pretty badly, so I needed to go out and try to clear my mind. There was also Ty’s invite. I didn’t tell Noel anything about it, but of course she noticed.

  “Any special reason we’re going?”

  Usually we don’t go to the beach every day. I help my mom run our family café and pastry shop, Azure Pearl, a few days a week. Sometimes, during the summer months, Noel joins us, too. But it’s only March, and the busy season hasn’t started yet.

  I look away, nibbling at my lower lip nervously.

  She notices my nervousness and laughs softly. “What?”

  “I talked to Ty.”

  “Oka-aay…”

  “He asked me to come.”

  This time she throws her head back, her long blond strands falling behind her back and shaking with her laughter. “Girl, you’re smitten.”

  I sigh, but can’t help smiling. Noelani has that kind of effect on people. She’s always cheerful, making jokes and teasing. It’s hard to be serious when you have a goofball like her around. That’s partly the reason why I invited her to join me; I needed some fun and laughter in my life after talking to Tutu.

  “Like I don’t know it.”

  We chuckle the rest of the way to the beach.

  Leaving our towels on the sand, I look at the ocean. The sun is still high in the sky, so I put a hand over my eyes to shield them from the brightness. I really have to buy a new pair of sunglasses asap.

  “There they are.” Noel points her finger to the left.

  And sure enough, a group of four guys are out there in the ocean. They’re lying on their boards looking at the horizon.

  Observing.

  Waiting.

  In the same moment I notice it, one of the guys does, too. They’re too far from land to see their faces clearly, but I see the small figure paddling toward the wave. He catches it, almost effortlessly, and rises in the air.

  The late afternoon sun glisters over him, making his blond head shine brightly.

  Taylor.

  Breath gets stuck in my lungs as I watch him. His posture is perfect, balance impeccable. He doesn’t look like someone who was swallowed by the sea less than twenty-four hours ago. No, he’s the king of the waves like always.

  The wave closes over him, forming a pipeline. It’s big and fierce, moving fast.

  I don’t think I’m able to breathe until he gets out.

  Safe and unharmed.

  His friends gather around him to congratulate him.

  “Come on, Risa.” Noel jabs me in the ribs. “You wanted to come, so let’s go swimming.”

  Noel grabs the hem of her light pink sundress and pulls it over her head, revealing a
white bikini with a flower pattern. She throws her dress and sunglasses on the towel and hurries toward the ocean.

  Taking off my shorts and tank top, I kick my flip-flops off my feet and hurry behind my giggling best friend.

  The day’s pretty hot and I got all sweaty helping Mom in the café, so a swim will do me good.

  Noel runs a few feet through the shallow part before she jumps in completely. I follow her lead, not wanting to stay behind.

  My feet touch the water.

  One foot.

  Two.

  And I dive under.

  The ocean swirls around me, salty water kissing my skin.

  It feels good.

  So good.

  Like coming home after a long day in the office when you were so focused on your work you forgot to eat and drink.

  It’s like my whole body, my whole being, can finally breathe easily.

  My skin enjoys the feeling of ocean touching it, almost like it’s trying to absorb it. Drink it in before it’s taken away. My dark hair starts floating around me, silky strands touching my cheeks and shoulders.

  I breathe in, wanting to feel the smell of the ocean.

  Needing it.

  Craving it.

  My eyes fly open suddenly, realizing what I’ve done.

  Because humans… we don’t breathe underwater.

  “What the hell?!”

  I look around myself. I’m still below the surface, my breathing normal and vision clear. I open my mouth, but instead of water entering my lungs, everything feels normal.

  Lowering my gaze, I check the rest of my body, although I know what I’ll find. I knew it the moment my toes touched the ocean.

  My one-piece black suit with dozens of tiny strips on the hips and a deep V neck is gone, along with my feet. Below my waist is a tail, long and shimmery, covered in blue-green scales that twinkle almost teasingly at me. The top covering my chest is the same color as my tail, and it feels like it’s a part of my skin.

  Why is this happening again? Last night when I wanted to get out of the ocean, my tail wouldn’t switch to my legs and now I’m a mermaid again? Wasn’t the spell, or whatever the ocean nymph used on me, supposed to stop once I completed my mission?

  Mermaids don’t help. They bargain. The only question is, what is on the line?

  Tutu’s words come back to haunt me.

  Anger and frustration wash over me. I want to throw something, scream, but I don’t think that’ll have any effect beneath the water.

  Not knowing what to do, I turn around only to catch a glimpse of white and a pair of long legs.

  Noelani.

  All the anger is gone now, replaced with panic.

  Icy and terrifying.

  She’s looking for me. I’m sure of it. I jumped into the ocean a little after her, so by now I should have swum out.

  How will I explain it? How will I explain why I am so much farther away from her? How will I explain the tail? What will happen if she accidently touches me underneath the water? What if her legs brush against mine and she feels the scales covering my skin?

  Those and many other questions start buzzing through my brain, but I can’t just go without saying a word. That would be even more suspicious.

  Swallowing the lump in my throat, I pull on my big girl panties, reigning in my wreck of emotions and calmly assessing the situation.

  I have to go to her. She knows I jumped in after her, and just disappearing will cause confusion and questions. Then I have to get out of here.

  And fast.

  I can only hope that she won’t notice something is strange. Like the fact that black straps don’t cover my shoulders like they did a minute ago. Or the fact that I’m sporting a tail. That would be really awkward.

  Taking in one deep breath, I try to calm my nerves.

  Everything will be all right.

  I chant that over and over as I speed toward the pair of legs.

  Taking a wider arc so that she doesn’t feel me pass by, I make a turn and come swimming from behind her, as if I just dove in and had been behind her the whole time. I pass by, mindful not to touch her, and slowly get out of the water, making sure that my hair is covering my shoulders. Making sure there is enough distance between us so she can’t see anything, can’t touch anything.

  “There you are!” Noel calls loudly. “I was worried that you drowned or something!”

  “Or something,” I mutter so quietly she doesn’t hear me. “I was just behind you.”

  Taking a deep, calming breath in, I slowly turn around to look at her. “This is a bad idea, Noel.”

  She frowns. “What is a bad idea?”

  I lift my arms in the air. “All of it. That’s why it took me a bit longer. I just stood there, looking at them. Ty is happy with his friends, he doesn’t need me around. He isn’t interested in me like that, we both know it. He was probably just being polite.”

  Even though I’m doing this to conceal the whole mermaid thing, the look of pity that passes through her brown eyes is real. And it hurts. It really hurts.

  I’ve liked Taylor for so long, and he doesn’t even notice me. The worst part is, everybody can see it.

  “Risa…”

  I shake my head, trying to hold in the tears that burn my eyes.

  “I’m right.” When she doesn’t say anything to contradict me, I muster a smile. It’s forced and as fake as they come, but it’s something. “I think I’m going to go for a swim.”

  “I’ll come with you,” Noel offers, but I stop her with a decisive shake of my head. “No, I have to do this on my own.”

  Figure out what is happening to me.

  Figure out how to be normal again.

  And most importantly, figure out how to fall out of love with Taylor Reed before it brings me more heartache than it already has.

  Marissa

  Slowly, I turn around and start swimming. At a human’s pace.

  I want to dive in and use the full power of my amazing new, although totally weird and not wanted, abilities to maneuver as fast as I can. But it’s too risky to do so when I’m in the open, where everybody can see me.

  Noel’s eyes follow me for as long as they can. I can feel them probe at the back of my head, watching over me. When I’m out of her sight, I do what I wanted to do from the beginning.

  I dive under and don’t come back up.

  I swim aimlessly, without a destination in mind.

  Deeper.

  Faster.

  Farther.

  Anything to escape the hollowness in my chest.

  I empty my mind of all the things inside of it and swim.

  The water feels warm on my skin, and different types of fish swim all around me. The bottom of the ocean is filled with different organisms and plants, corals and rocks. I wish I had a camera to capture all this beauty, but at the same time, I’m glad I don’t. Now I can simply explore, look around and enjoy all the beautiful creatures and secrets that the ocean keeps hidden from the human eye.

  The farther I go from the coast, the more vivid life is around me. I even get to see a huge turtle swimming around. Seeing that old, wrinkled creature makes me smile. They are so rare, and it’s hard to spot them nowadays closer to the beaches.

  She swam by me, totally unfazed with seeing a human. Maybe because in this moment, when I’m underwater, I’m not a human. I could almost touch her, but I didn’t want to scare the poor thing away. Or give her a heart attack. Do turtles have heart attacks?

  “I see you’re enjoying your new abilities.” The voice startles me so much, I jump slightly in surprise.

  Pressing my hand over my racing heart, I turn around and come face-to-face with the mermaid responsible for everything that’s happening to me.

  Ocean nymph.

  “You…” I point my finger in her direction, still slightly trembling from the surprise. Getting used to the silence of the ocean is pretty easy. “You shouldn’t sneak up on people like that.”

  She w
aves her hand, dismissing me. “You should be more aware of your surroundings, Marissa.”

  She’s even more beautiful now than she was the last time I saw her.

  Ancient yet youthful.

  Her black hair surrounds her, the current playing with the long strands. Caressing them. Lifting and twirling. It almost feels like magic.

  Eyes the same shade as mine look at me with curiosity and wonder. If you look at them carefully, you can see the knowledge infused in them from years on this planet. Cunning, that’s what Tutu said. Cunning.

  Calculating.

  “What happened to me?” I lift my chin up in defiance. “Why am I still a mermaid?”

  The silence lasts a heartbeat or two, before the nymph lightly chuckles. “You agreed, Marissa.”

  The sound of her giggles makes the fine hair on my arms rise.

  “Agreed to what?” I utter quietly.

  I try to go back in time, review my memory of last night. Has it only been one night? But everything is fuzzy. Dark. I can mostly remember the feelings.

  Confusion.

  Desperation.

  Need.

  Anger.

  Loneliness.

  And more desperation.

  They’re all wrapped tightly together. I only wanted to survive. I only wanted for Ty and me to come home in one piece and breathing.

  I would do anything …

  My own words resound in my brain. Taunting me.

  “What have I agreed to?” I shout loudly, demanding an answer. Panic finally rolling in.

  ‘Anything’ is a heavy word. A word that shouldn’t be uttered because it means so little and so much at the same time. It takes your power and makes you helpless.

  “You agreed for me to help you.” She starts swirling a strand of her long black hair around her finger. Totally untouched by my demanding tone.

  I guess when you’re the ocean nymph, queen of your own world, you don’t get fazed by a mere human demanding answers. But I’m not going home without them. I can’t stay like this. Living on an island, there is no way for me to avoid the ocean, and if every time I touch the water I change into a mermaid…

  “In exchange for what?”