Underwater

by Doe, Anna B.

  “I’ll be here.”

  I hurry to the girls’ bathroom, almost tripping over my own feet in the process. Damn high heels. If I didn’t get the dress so last-minute, I’d have had the length adjusted so I could wear flat sandals or Chucks with it.

  A few girls are waiting for their turn, but all in all, it’s not as bad as I suspected it would be. The room is filled with different scents of perfume. Some girls are chatting while reapplying their make-up and rearranging their hair.

  When it’s finally my turn, I do my business quickly, ready to return to Taylor and get this over with. Break the curse. Get the boy I love. Live my happily ever after.

  Easy peasy.

  Since my last run-in with the nymph, I tried to stay away from the ocean as much as possible. Even when my skin was aching unbearably, I tried to resist the pull. The longest I managed to stay away was two days. Two whole days full of a torturous burning feeling running through my veins until I wanted to scream in agony. Only then did I jump into the ocean, but just for a little while and never moving far from land.

  Technically, I knew the nymph could get out of the ocean anywhere on the island, but I was hoping this way I could keep her away from taking on a human form.

  I wash my hands, completely ignoring my appearance, and get out of the bathroom. But I slow down when I bump into something.

  Someone.

  Caleb.

  Marissa

  I don’t have to look up to know it’s him. I can feel it.

  I know his body heat. I know how my body molds to his whenever we’re together. His specific scent. A mix of a clean male, just a tad of cologne and the smell of the ocean.

  So perfect.

  So him.

  His hands dart forward to catch me from falling, and I grip his forearms to regain my balance.

  Our eyes connect, and it feels like I’m falling all over again.

  My heart aches in my chest with longing, and I can feel it slowly speed up. It’s as if the whole time we were apart it was in a deep slumber, only coming awake now that he’s near me.

  He looks so handsome. His face is clean-shaven, making his cheekbones stand out and his dark hair is a disheveled mess. It looks like he’s been running his fingers through it, or maybe he just got out of bed and decided he was too lazy to do anything about it. Either way, it looks good on him.

  I let my eyes run down his body, taking him in.

  Most of the guys decided on a suit, but not Caleb. He’s wearing dark gray pants with a white dress shirt. The first few buttons are undone, giving everybody a peek at the tanned skin hiding beneath it. His sleeves are rolled to his elbows, revealing bare, muscled forearms. He doesn’t have a tie or a suit jacket, but then again, it doesn’t fit his bad-boy persona, so I’m not surprised.

  “Mar…” The nickname falls from his lips like a plea. It’s a soft whisper I can feel deep in my bones.

  His eyes roam my body, and I can feel them everywhere. His heated stare burns my skin, and it’s like he can see everything that’s hiding underneath.

  “You look…” The words hang in the air as he looks at me. And the longer he stays quiet, the more nervous I become. “Stunning.”

  His hands cup my cheeks, fingers getting lost in the curls framing my face. He lowers his head until our noses touch.

  “Caleb…”

  One word…

  How can so much be conveyed in one simple word?

  It feels like I placed my whole heart and soul into that one word.

  And he understands it; I know he does. I can see it. His jaw tightens, eyes narrowing if only slightly. I can see the desperation creep into them.

  “Don’t do it,” Caleb murmurs quickly, his hands gripping my face tighter. “Don’t go to him. There has to be another way, please…”

  I’m not sure when the tears appeared, but when I blink, they fall down. One by one, they fall steadily as my heart breaks at his words.

  “I can’t…” I start shaking my head, pulling away from his touch. Away from him.

  “There has to be another way.”

  “There isn’t, Caleb.” My hands cover his on my cheeks, and for a second, I let myself feel his warmth. “I wish there was, but there isn’t.”

  Slowly, oh so slowly, I untangle his hands from my face. Through the blurriness of my eyes, I can see tears fill his and it breaks me.

  It freaking breaks me. Watching this proud, talented, cocky boy fight tears in his eyes breaks me.

  Biting my lower lip to stop the sob from emerging, I take a step back.

  Caleb’s hands hang in the air, as if they want to hold on to me, but I shake my head, so he lets them drop. It somehow feels final, and that alone causes more tears to fall.

  One second longer. That’s how much time I give myself to look at his beautiful face. One second longer. Then I spin on the heels of my feet and run away through the crowd with my head bowed down so they can’t see my sadness.

  On my way out, I stumble into Ty. The air gets stuck in my lungs, and the force of the impact makes me wobble on my legs.

  Taylor’s hands ground me. “Hey, where are you…” He lifts my chin so he can look at me. “Risa, are you okay? Why are you crying?”

  His usually calm, cheerful face darkens, looking at me. I can see his eyes take me in, probably searching for the cause of my tears, but he doesn’t find it. Of course he doesn’t find it. No physical pain will ever feel this way.

  “What happened?” Ty asks. His voice cold, almost icy. If he wasn’t still holding my face, making me look at him, I wouldn’t believe this voice belonged to him.

  “I-it’s n-nothing,” I hiccup. “Let’s get out of here.”

  Ty’s jaw is set in a tight line, but he doesn’t resist when I take his hand in mine and pull him toward the exit.

  In silence we get out of the building and onto the beach. Some people are already outside, so I walk farther away, some place where we can be alone.

  “What is going on, Marissa?” Taylor finally demands, pulling at my hand to stop me from walking.

  I turn around, the silky material of my dress swaying around my legs with the motion, realizing we’ve come farther than I originally thought.

  “Why are you crying?”

  The tears have mostly dried by now, but I can still feel them. Burning in my eyes.

  “I…” The breath gets stuck in my lungs, but I force it out slowly.

  The almost-full moon shining brightly over Ty’s shoulder draws my attention. My time is almost up. I can feel it pass. Slip like sand through my fingers.

  My lower lip wobbles.

  “Hey…” Ty comes closer to me, so close we’re standing toe to toe.

  Softly, he brushes his fingers over my cheeks.

  Gentle.

  Always so gentle.

  My eyes fall to the ground, and I can feel my heart beat faster. This is it; I can feel it.

  His fingers come under my chin, lifting my face up to look at him. This thumb brushes over my cheek, wiping away the tears.

  His head is closer, so close I can feel his warm breath touch my skin. My eyes fall shut, and I feel my lips part a little.

  He’ll kiss me. After all this time, Taylor will finally kiss me.

  My lips tremble at the thought as another tear rolls down.

  His forehead touches mine.

  “I can’t…” Ty murmurs, brushing away the hair from my face.

  His lips press hard against my forehead.

  “I’m sorry, I can’t.”

  I blink my eyes open and focus on him. “What?” I ask, confused.

  What is going on? He was supposed to kiss me. He wanted to kiss me. I know he did.

  Why do you feel relieved he didn’t kiss you then?

  “I can’t,” Ty breathes, a nervous chuckle parting his lips. His forehead still pressed against mine.

  “What do you mean you can’t?”

  Icy dread enters my body. No. This can’t be happening. Not now. He h
as to do it. He has to kiss me and tell me he’s been a fool all these years, not realizing we belong together. Not realizing he’s in love with me. If he doesn’t… then it’s all over.

  “You were about to kiss me. You can’t back out now!” I yell, panic consuming me.

  It can’t end like this. I can’t go back to the ocean forever. I can’t let the nymph get my legs and come to land. I can’t…

  If I do, she’ll come back for Caleb. She’ll take him away.

  “I loved you!” I yell at him, hoping he’ll realize. “For years, I’ve been in love with you.”

  Ty’s arms curl around me, pulling me into a hug.

  Soft.

  Gentle.

  Secure.

  Friendly.

  No, I’m not doing this. Forcefully, I start resisting him, trying to pull out of his arms.

  “That’s the problem, Risa!” Ty shouts at me, his hands holding me still.

  “What’s the problem?” I lift my chin in the air, my eyes meeting his. I don’t even care that he can see me cry. “That I loved you?”

  “No, you said it yourself. You loved me. Loved.” His hands grip my cheeks tighter. “Past tense, Risa. You don’t love me anymore.”

  “That’s not possible.” I shake my head, hoping to reason with him. “I’ve been in love with you since forever. It doesn’t just go away like that. I would know; I’ve been trying it for years.”

  His blue eyes soften when he looks at me. “That is where you’re wrong.”

  “No.” I shake my head.

  No, no, no, no.

  It’s not possible.

  “It is. You’ve been in love with somebody else. Think about it.”

  I close my eyes. Tears are falling down so hard, I can’t see anything anymore. Not even the shape of Ty’s face that’s right in front of my eyes. My breathing elevates to the point that it’s hard to breathe. My ears start ringing, and black and white spots play before my eyes, fighting with the blurriness of the tears still falling. When will they stop?

  “Risa?”

  My name… somebody is calling my name. I stumble as my hand reaches forward. The ringing is still present in my ears, but I can feel something else. Breathing… somebody’s struggling to breathe.

  Why is it suddenly so hot in here?

  “Are you okay?”

  The question confuses me for a while. It’s like I’m in a tunnel, his voice everywhere and nowhere at the same time. What is he talking about? I’m fine. Of course I’m…

  I groan in pain as it becomes hotter. Why is it so hot in here? I’m not even talking extreme heat in the middle of a summer day; I’m talking about burning. It feels like I’m burning.

  My skin itches so hard.

  Mermaid.

  I’m becoming a mermaid.

  He can’t see me like this.

  “I-I…” My voice is so low and raspy, I almost don’t recognize it as my own. “I have to go.”

  And then I run.

  Caleb

  “Marrisa!” I run down the beach, my eyes scanning through the darkness looking for her. Looking for a flash of green in the blackness of the night.

  I shouldn’t have let her go. I never should have let her out of my sight. Worry like I’ve never felt before is running though my veins. Fear.

  Where are they?

  “Dammit!” I curse, ready to turn the other way, when I see one lone figure walking through the night.

  The almost-full moon makes his hair shine in the dark.

  Taylor.

  I sprint toward him, going as fast as I can. “Where is she?”

  “Caleb.” Ty lifts his eyes to me. I can see worry fill them, and my blood runs cold.

  “Where is she?” I demand through gritted teeth. “Where is Marissa?”

  “I don’t know, man.” Ty runs his hand through his hair, pulling at its ends. “One moment everything was okay, and then she just… flipped. She started crying, and then she became pale. Her breathing was hard, and I thought she was going to faint. She was scratching her hands, like something was crawling over her skin, and then she up and ran away.”

  “And you let her go alone?!” I roar, my hands gripping his shirt and lifting him in the air.

  Ty raises both hands in surrender, but I don’t fucking care. He let her go alone. In the dark, when she wasn’t feeling well. Jackass.

  “It all happened so fast, I don’t even know what got into her. It’s like she was possessed or something. I guess I hoped if I gave her a little time alone…”

  “You left her fucking alone, at night, on the beach.” My teeth are gritting so hard I’m surprised my molars don’t break already. The grip I have on his shirt is strong, my knuckles turning white.

  “I…”

  Suddenly, I can’t take it anymore. The sight of his face makes me so angry.

  He left her alone.

  Crying and vulnerable.

  On the night of the full moon.

  I growl loudly. Unclenching my grip on his shirt, I let him drop, but not for long. I pull my hand back, and while he’s trying to get his footing, I swing and connect my fist with his face.

  My hand burns from the impact, but it’s nothing compared to what she has to be feeling right now.

  “She trusted you!” I yell at his sorry, beaten ass on the sand.

  Livid.

  I want to punch him again and again until I make him hurt as much as he hurt Marissa, but I don’t. I take a step back, making myself inhale deeply.

  She needs me.

  Marissa needs me.

  And she’ll always come first.

  Spitting on the ground next to him, I rein in the beast that wants to get out and have its revenge, and without a word, start jogging in the direction he came from.

  MARISSA

  The voice, it’s calling me, but I can’t think straight from all this burning. Why does it hurt so much? Am I in hell? Is this my punishment?

  I run as fast as I can.

  Water.

  I need water.

  Somewhere along the way, I stumble, falling forward. My ankle hurts, but it’s minor in relation to the burning feeling assaulting all my senses. It’s like the fire is coming from within me.

  I take off my heels, scrambling back to my wobbly feet, and then I run again. I can’t see where I’m going between the darkness of the night, the tears in my eyes and the brilliant shine of the full moon, I’m blinded.

  The only thing on my mind is to get to the ocean.

  Get to it and drown the burning sensation in my body.

  I’m so preoccupied with all the emotions and feelings, I don’t see the edge of the cliff until I’m falling.

  The air scrapes at my skin as I fall down, down, down.

  For a second, I feel fear.

  Terrifying.

  All-consuming.

  But then I remember the pain.

  Anything is better than pain.

  Even the eternal darkness.

  I get ready for it. The impact and then nothingness, but it never comes.

  My body falls with a loud splash, the ocean enveloping my body like a mother hugging her child to her chest. Cool and inviting, bubbles and foam wrap around me in a protective bubble as if they’re inviting me home.

  CALEB

  I run down the beach, calling her name. My legs burn with the effort and my voice is getting raspy from all the shouting, but I don’t stop. I’m not stopping until I find her.

  Frantically, my eyes scan the beach and the ocean. She has to be somewhere.

  She has to.

  It’s the last full moon. The voice in my head reminds me.

  “She isn’t lost to me,” I mutter stubbornly. “I won’t accept that.”

  Then I see it, the flash of green at the top of the cliff. She’s running.

  Running toward the edge.

  “MARISSA!”

  I let it unleash, every emotion, every thought, every bit of strength down to the tiniest atom in my body
. I unleash it all and I run.

  I run so hard and so fast, like I’ve never run before, but it’s not enough.

  Never fast enough.

  “MARISSA!” I scream her name, in hope she’ll hear me. In hope she’ll turn my way and grace me with her sweet smile, but she doesn’t.

  She runs, runs, runs.

  Never stopping.

  Never looking back.

  For a second, it’s like she’s frozen, her body floating in the air. For a second, I dare to hope I’ll reach her in time, but I don’t. She starts falling, and all I can do is watch.

  Watch her as her name leaves my mouth.

  A shattered growl.

  A plea for help.

  I’m not sure.

  But even that doesn’t slow me down. If she has to fall, she’s not falling alone.

  I run after her, not even the edge of the cliff making me stop as I jump off.

  Because for Marissa?

  I’d do anything. Risk anything, even my own life.

  Marissa

  It’s dark and quiet.

  Why is it so dark and quiet suddenly?

  Blinking, my eyes flutter open.

  Where am I?

  The events of the night slowly come back.

  Getting ready for prom with Noel. Taking pictures with my family. Rob and Ty picking us up… Ty… dancing… Caleb…

  My heart squeezes painfully.

  The beach… Ty… he’s trying to…

  I let my eyes close.

  He never kissed me.

  Never said he loved me.

  You loved me. Loved. Past tense, Risa. You don’t love me anymore.

  The words play on repeat in my mind.

  Loved.

  Not love.

  Loved.

  “So much for you showing me who’s boss, Marissa.”

  I turn around when I hear her voice whisper in my ear.

  We’re in her protective bubble again, the one that she put me in three months ago. Only this time she’s the human, and I’m the mermaid.