by Kris Pearson
All through the forestry meeting his attention had been split between the business at hand and the business he’d like to be attending to. He itched to get very personal with Ellie again. He’d made no plans yet...was being dragged along in a mindless daze by his eager body. Just the sight of her still turned him on. When she was as close as this, and he could smell her and so nearly touch her, he felt like a randy kid again. Deliciously desperate. Acutely alive after the long guilt-ridden months of watching Julia get weaker and weaker, and knowing his girls weren’t getting the education they needed.
He tightened his grip on the steering wheel and directed his attention back to the road.
“Okay, here we go,” he said a few minutes later, swinging the SUV between two spiky Nikau palms and onto a sloping track. They bounced over the potholed surface, and then levelled out on the river flat. “I’ll drop you here for a while and head off to Bob’s. The best place for fossils is over there.” He waved across to a stony bank. “Don’t dig in so far that you collapse the ground on top of you.”
“With two garden trowels and hired labour this size?”
“I’m serious Ellie—the land can be unstable around here. Go carefully, and have fun.”
He pulled the handbrake on and strode around to the back of the vehicle, lifted the hamper and a chilly-bin out, and set them against the trunk of a willow. “It should stay shady enough there until lunchtime. You’ll need to watch the dog around the food. See you back here sometime before noon.” He kissed each daughter’s cheek, and laughed as they made a beeline for the hamper.
While the girls’ attention was diverted, he caught Ellie’s hand, wishing he could draw her close enough to press his body against hers and feel the softness of her breasts, the cradle of her hips. “Don’t tire yourself out,” he said, with half a smile and a raised eyebrow. To his pleasure she closed her eyes, and he watched a definite blush steal up her neck and over her face. She wasn’t entirely immune then. Good to know.
He bumped away up the track, leaving a cloud of dust floating in the still air. Slowly it settled. And just as slowly his heart ceased its exhilarated thumping.
CHAPTER SIX
The girls showed no interest in fossil-hunting. Instead, they insisted on wriggling into the swimsuits Ginny had packed, and paddling about in the river shallows with Tasha, the old spaniel.
Ellie planted her feet in a patch of shingle and stood watching them. How easy it would be to fall in with Tony’s plans. To resume their long-ago affair as though the intervening years had never happened. Plainly he was keen. And her own body clamoured for his attentions even if her cautious mind warned her to tread with care.
But if she had to deny herself the intoxicating pleasure Tony could provide, it also meant she’d avoid the pain of their eventual parting. A night spent tossing and turning, and remembering how good they’d been together, had scared her silly. She’d loved him eleven years ago with all the passion and joy of her youthful heart. She didn’t want to fall in love like that again. Couldn’t jeopardise all her careful planning. Her years of scrimping and saving to take the best possible care of Cal. And she knew she was perilously close to risking it.
She dragged her mind back to his daughters—the reason he’d employed her. “We could make a waterfall,” she said, pushing off her sandals and stepping a little way into the water. She heaved a couple of hefty stones across to start a miniature dam in one of the channels, wondering if a lecture on hydro-electricity might be in order and then abandoning the idea.
The cool water caressed her ankles and calves. It was bliss to paddle about, scooping up stones, placing them so ‘their’ small piece of the river was diverted. But she soon realised the folly of wearing her olive green T-shirt. The sun soaked into the dense colour and her back became burning hot. She stood and flapped some air up under it every now and then.
“Put your swimsuit on, Ellie,” Antonia suggested.
She didn’t have a swimsuit...hadn’t expected to be splashing about in the water. But her underwear was decent enough, and it was wonderfully private in this secluded place. There was not a single sign of human habitation. No houses, no visible road, no power lines, not even any farm fences because of the lush vegetation on the opposite side of the river. The willows and poplars were in early summer leaf, bushy and dense. What would it matter? She didn’t expect Tony to return any time soon.
“Back in a minute. You two be very careful,” she called, picking her way across to where he’d placed the hamper in the shade. She stripped off her dark T-shirt and shorts to reveal white bikini panties and a pretty enough white bra. Ginny had packed a big bottle of sunscreen lotion. Ellie smoothed some over her arms and shoulders and legs, and took it down to the water’s edge.
“Come out for a moment and I’ll put some of this on for you.”
“We already did that.”
Had they? She doubted it. “Well it’s time for more,” she insisted. “You’ll burn up fast in this sun.”
After token resistance Antonia sidled across and let Ellie smother her in the lotion. Caro followed with more reluctance, gazing at the river, kicking at the stones and feigning great impatience.
“Are you going to do me too?”
She froze. Tony stood not far behind her. He’d returned much sooner than she’d expected. Or perhaps the time had simply slipped by very fast? She had no way of telling—her watch was by the hamper. The gurgling river noise must have masked the sound of his engine, unless he’d coasted quietly down the track, hoping to take her unawares?
“Daddy’s in his underpants,” Caro shrieked. Ants also collapsed with giggles, as though this was the biggest joke of the year.
Ellie cast a cautious glance over her shoulder. They were stretchy burgundy boxers, but they fitted him like a second skin, clinging to his lean hips and taut buttocks—and she had no intention of checking the rest in any detail.
“You’re a grown-up—you can do your own,” she muttered.
“I can’t do my back, Ellie. And you haven’t done yours too well, if it comes to that. Hold still.”
He took the bottle from her unresisting fingers and drizzled the liquid over her shoulders, massaging it into her hot skin with a firm hand.
“Bend over a little.” The cold lotion hit just above her bra-strap, and she flinched. “Do you want to undo that, or shall I work up to the edges?” he murmured. His fingers moved lower, paying special attention to each knob of her spine, circling around the bones with suggestive little caresses.
Her nipples had contracted to hard throbbing peaks the instant he touched her. She crossed her arms over her breasts to hide the damning evidence. Even resting against her own arms, their sensitivity was extreme. “Just slap it on,” she mumbled. “It’ll go in the wash after today.”
Another squirt of the cold lotion hit the centre of her back. His hand covered it warmly and continued smoothing over the area between her bra and panties.
“White for a virgin,” he murmured, and Ellie’s heart contracted. He’d said the same thing in Sydney eleven years ago, as they swam in the hotel pool before their second night together—although her white bikini had been a good deal briefer than today’s less-than-provocative bra and panties.
She glanced over her shoulder, and of course he’d been waiting for her to look at him. His dark eyes danced with suggestive amusement, and the sun struck golden flashes in their depths. As her eyes meshed with his, he pursed his lips and sent her a tiny kiss his daughters would never register.
Ellie buzzed with sensation, and the warmth concentrated itself further and further inside until she could absolutely feel the lick of soft flames deep in her pelvis. Damn the man! He could still demolish her after all this time.
She shook her head, smiling despite herself. “Your turn then,” she said, stepping around behind him, determined to remember it was only one friend rubbing sun protection on another.
His back was as beautiful as she’d remembered—long, lean
, and smoothly muscled. She squeezed a big dollop of lotion onto her palm and set the bottle down on the river bank, then rubbed her hands together and reached up to his shoulders, sliding in toward his neck, running her thumbs up to his hairline and down again.
It was like returning to a much-loved landscape—a place where only good memories resided. Every slope and hollow seemed achingly familiar. She worked in silence, hearing his breathing but registering little else through the sheer bliss of touching him again. Even the noise of the girls faded away as she concentrated on covering his whole back. She squeezed out more sunscreen and spread it along the deep groove of his spine...out over the hard curve of his ribcage... down to his trim waist.
“Do you want to push those down, or will I just work up to the edge?” she couldn’t resist asking.
He chuckled and pushed his briefs down a few inches. Ellie stood close behind him, massaging the slippery lotion out over his hipbones, in to his spine again, and lower than was probably wise. She pressed a little harder, rubbing just above his tailbone, knowing how much he used to enjoy being touched there. He tensed...breathing faster...alive beneath her hands. She feathered her fingers upward to his shoulders and began to smooth the sunscreen over his arms.
He let out a long frustrated sigh and she smiled, unseen, behind him.
“Ellie...” he said. It was a moan, a plea, an acknowledgement of need. She’d taken him on at his own game and beaten him. He swivelled to face her.
And to hide the state of his body from his daughters?
“Will you do my front, too?” he asked.
For a few moments she stood quite still. And then, tempted beyond breaking point, she squeezed out more sunscreen into one palm, hooked a finger into the waistband of his boxers, slid her slippery hand inside and grasped him.
He groaned as she drew her slick fingers back along his impressive length once, twice, then deserted him and whirled away.
“You seem to have done it beautifully yourself,” she called back over her shoulder as she escaped into the river. “A nice cold dip is good for that sort of inflammation.”
He pursued her into the water, catching her around the waist and pulling her back against him. They collapsed together in a splashing heaving heap, steam practically boiling off their superheated skin.
“Daddy—mind our waterfall!” Ants exclaimed.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Ellie knew it would be almost impossible to regain her ground now. Why on earth had she given in and done that?
He’d been deliberately winding her up. So? Some of the older children at school were experts—and she could cut them down to size with a cool stare and a few stern words.
But she was out of control with Tony. Grabbing him was inexcusable. It was such an obvious invitation when she’d sworn to keep her distance. And so close to the girls! Could she ever backtrack from here? “More chicken?” she asked, avoiding his eyes.
He passed his plate across and she forked the food onto it as they reclined in the dappled shade of the big willow tree. Tony had spread out a picnic rug and the two beach towels Ginny had packed. The girls had eaten, and wandered a short distance away to pick wildflowers.
Unspoken questions sizzled back and forth in the languid air. Tony put down his plate.
“Shall we look for the fossils now?” Ellie asked, too fast.
“No.” He smiled faintly. “We’ll make the most of our relative privacy and decide how we’re going to handle this situation.”
“There’s no ‘situation’ to handle.”
“That’s not how it feels to me, Ellie. As far as I’m concerned, we’re back in Sydney. We had a fantastic thing going there. I’m lusting for you again to an unbelievable degree.”
Lusting. Yes, that about sums it up.
She chastised herself yet again for responding to him on the balcony the previous evening...absolutely cursing at her stupidity with the sunscreen, even if the satin-and-steel sensation of him under her fingers had been magic.
Lusting was something animals did. She was prepared to admit she lusted after Tony. Would even concede, in her most secret heart of hearts, that it might be more than lust as far as she was concerned. But she couldn’t possibly let him know that.
She bit down on her wayward tongue and searched for words to somehow deflect his intensity. “Tell me about Julia,” she demanded.
“Julia,” he sighed. “You’re not playing fair, Ellie.”
“I’m not playing at all.”
He collapsed back onto the rug and clamped his hands over his face. Ellie watched as he rubbed at his temples with his fingertips.
“Julia,” he repeated, despairingly. “I’m never going to forgive myself for wrecking Julia’s life.”
“I hardly think you did that.”
“She hated it here. She wasn’t a country girl. I should have seen it would be impossible.”
“Where did you meet her?”
“At a summer camp in the States. She’d gone there as a gym instructor. Darren and I were on the homeward leg of the trip by then. The American summer camps often have overseas helpers.”
He ran his fingers back across his closely-cropped scalp. He’d closed his eyes. Against the light, or unwanted memories? Ellie had no idea.
“So that was a while after you met me?”
“Ages. A couple of years. She was a pretty thing. Blonde like the girls.” He opened his eyes again and reached up to touch Ellie’s dark hair.
“Good thing I’m not a blonde then.”
He gave a mirthless laugh at that, then asked a few seconds later, “Were you sure of what you wanted ten years ago, Ellie? I know you’d enrolled to be a teacher—you told me that in Sydney. But with your life? Did you have plans beyond teaching?”
She shook her head, careful to give nothing away. Any plans she might have had were well and truly rearranged by becoming pregnant with his child.
“Julia was ambitious. She was absolutely sure of what she wanted—and the moment we met again at Matt’s wedding, it was me. I’ve never known a girl so single-minded. She was quite something.”
“And hard to resist?”
“Damned hard. She was a dynamo. She tended to get what she wanted.”
“Not that you objected, obviously?”
“Not hard enough, anyway. She was pretty, affectionate, from a well-to-do family. I thought she’d make a good wife. But she was a real schemer—tough as nails—although she kept that well hidden to start with. Both her brothers are competitive as hell. I suppose she took her cue from them—or from her dad, David, while he was still alive. Ginny’s a honey by comparison.”
He reached across and linked his fingers through hers so she couldn’t pull free. He’d been a hand-holder in Sydney; she’d loved being out in public with him, branded as his by a casual warm clasp.
“I’m not interested,” she growled, gazing down at their joined hands.
“You were into my pants before lunch. That felt pretty damned interested.”
“A moment’s aberration,” she declared, knowing she was on very shaky ground.
Tony let loose a whoop of laughter. “That’s a new name for it.”
“It won’t happen again.”
“We’ll see.” He let go of her hand, and she pulled it back well out of his reach.
“And then she announced she was pregnant.” The humour had fled from his voice.
Ellie’s world stood still.
“So that was me, ready-trussed for roasting. She really put the acid on after that. Marriage was a foregone conclusion as far as she was concerned.”
Ellie breathed out very slowly with the pain, and lowered herself to lean back on her elbows. She stared ahead, trembling, seeing nothing, as her emotions seethed and boiled almost out of control.
“Condom must have failed,” Tony continued. “Or maybe she sabotaged it? That nasty little possibility did occur to me. I was always careful with my ladies. You were already on the pill, and I was care
ful with you, wasn’t I?”
“After the first night,” she agreed in a small voice.
The unfairness of the situation was horrendous. Worse than she’d ever imagined possible.
Julia had become pregnant and gained everything—the man Ellie had wanted, his children, a luxurious lifestyle.
Ellie had become pregnant, and lost, and lost, and lost.
Lost her mother’s esteem for long months. Lost the opportunity of training as a teacher until the following year. Lost the company of her son while she was away achieving her diploma. Lost any chance of Callum knowing his father.
And lost her heart forever, she acknowledged. Tony had spoiled her for any future man.
“So there we were,” he continued. “City girl and country guy, stuck miles out in the back-blocks, her as sick as a dog most mornings. I wrecked her life, all right. She never really recovered.”
“You seriously think she got herself pregnant on purpose?”
“I was careful. Always used condoms with her before we married. Always. But who knows?” He plucked at a blade of grass and spoke towards the river. “I hoped I might track you down when I came back, but Julia’s pregnancy put paid to that.”
“No,” Ellie breathed, shaking her head in disbelief. The ache in her heart intensified. He’d remembered her? Still wanted her? And been stolen away by history repeating itself? It was tragic beyond anything she could imagine.
Tony waved at the horse-fly threatening to land on his belly, then shot her an anguished glance. “You were special to me, Ellie. Out of the question all those years ago in Sydney, but special.” He reached across and ran a finger down the side of her face.
Ellie’s breath hitched, and instinctively she turned her head and sank her teeth into his hand to stop its unnerving progress.
“Stop,” she mumbled around his fingers. How she longed to lick his flesh, taste his skin, slide her tongue over him!