The Highlander's Hope - A Contemporary Highland Romance

by MacKay, Cali

  “The bars are just beyond the clay wall and look rusted in places.” Cat reached in and gave them a shake. “They’re still holding though. Give me a flashlight?”

  “Here ye are, lass.” Angus handed her his.

  She shone it into the hole, her pulse tripping over itself. A dozen or so large wooden boxes lay piled one on top of the other, filling the small space. “Well, I’ll be damned.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  “Unless ye know how to pick a lock, we’ll have to come back tomorrow with some bolt cutters. It’s too late to do it tonight.” Iain saw the disappointment in Cat’s eyes, but there was nothing for it. “We’ll come back first thing, since we’d not make it to the house and back before dark.”

  “What about the other branch of the tunnel?” There’d been yet another fork. “I’d still like to see where it leads.”

  “Tomorrow, love. We’ll not manage the difficult terrain once the sun sets.”

  Angus came to his aid. “He’s right, lass. A hike in the dark would only result in sprained or broken limbs, and despite my Tardis-like rucksack, I have no camping equipment with me.”

  Cat let out a weary sigh and managed a smile. “I know. It’s just that we’re so close, even if this ends up being nothing more than provisions or someone’s secret stash of chocolate-covered Hobnobs.”

  “Given my sister’s predilection for the chocolate treats, ye may very well be right.” Iain ran a hand down her arm. “We’ll be back at sun-up. We got a lot accomplished, and we’re one step closer, love.”

  She nodded, and with a final glance over her shoulder at what could be the find of a lifetime, they headed home.

  ***

  With Angus offering to host dinner for the night, Iain drove over with Cat nestled in the seat beside him. “It’s just up ahead. I think ye’ll like his place. He’s been renovating it for the last few years now.”

  As they turned down a long drive, the house came into view, the lights left on for them. “It was once a hunting lodge that had fallen into disrepair, and before that, a small manor. Angus has had a wee bit of help, but surprisingly enough, has done a fair amount of the work himself.”

  “It’s gorgeous, Iain. I adore the stone walls and the way the wooden beams jut out from under the roofline.” She gave his hand a squeeze. “So many windows too. Must be nice on a sunny day.”

  “Aye, it is. And ye can’t tell since it’s dark, but the sea lies just beyond. The view’s incredible.” He parked the car before shifting in his seat to face her.

  Brushing the hair from her face, he let his touch linger. What the hell had happened to him? Why was it he couldn’t bear to let her go? It got him thinking. Perhaps that was exactly what he needed to do. Maybe if she realized it would soon be over, she’d think twice about actually going. “I just wanted to tell ye that I’ve enjoyed our time together. I know ye’ve got to get back once we find the Hope, but I do hope ye’ll not sever all ties.”

  “No… of course not.” She looked away, unease and worry tainting her voice.

  Though Iain wanted to reassure her, he couldn’t. It was her decision to make, but if she was going to walk away, then he wasn’t going to make it easy for her. He’d just have to make her realize what it would be like if they weren’t in each other’s lives.

  “I’m glad to hear it then. Maybe if ye have time off from yer research next summer we could get together. Catch up on what ye been doing. Grab some dinner.”

  “Summer? That’s seven months away.” Another sigh as she looked away. “I suppose you’ll be busy catching up on business and sorting out your brother’s problems once I’m gone.”

  “Aye. Grant’s been hounding me with emails, and though he’s capable of dealing with things, there are still matters I need to tend to. With that said, I wouldn’t give up the time we’ve had together for anything.” He brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. “I’m going to miss ye, Cat.”

  “And I’ll miss you.”

  When she leaned in and kissed him, his heart thundered away at the possibilities—or what could be lost. With their heads bowed together, their cheeks touching, Iain took a moment to hold onto what time they had together before forcing himself to let her go. “We should go in. Angus will be cooking up a storm.”

  He started to go, but she put a hand on his arm. “Wait, Iain.”

  Turning back towards her, he tried not to sound too hopeful. “What is it, love?”

  “Maybe… I don’t know.” She shrugged and looked like she was mulling things over in that pretty head of hers. “Maybe you could come down to Cambridge during spring break and we could spend the week together.”

  “A week? Cat, what’s the point in prolonging the inevitable? Ye don’t want to pursue anything serious, and I like ye too much to keep this casual.” He let out a weary sigh. Why couldn’t she just tell him she’d stay? “I’ve yet to earn back enough of yer trust for ye to consider staying, and it’s only a matter of time before we find the Hope and ye leave.”

  The silence drew out between them, as he waited for her response. Finally, she shook her head. “It wasn’t supposed to happen like this, Iain. None of it.”

  “Well it did. Now what are ye going to do about it?” Frustration had his muscles in knots. “The decision is yers to make, Cat. But I’ll not be waiting around forever. Life goes on, and I know better than to let it pass me by. Ye can’t let the past keep ye from living in the present.”

  “I know that, Iain.”

  “Do ye? ‘Cause I’m not so sure.” Annoyed, he didn’t want to say something he’d regret. “Come on. Angus is waiting.”

  “I don’t know what you want me from, Iain.”

  “I want ye to stop ignoring how ye feel. What’s between us is more than just sex, Cat, and ye’d be lying if ye said otherwise.” He wanted to shake her until her teeth rattled and she saw sense.

  “How I feel about you makes no difference. It doesn’t change that you lied to me, or that I have to head back Cambridge—and it certainly doesn’t change the fact that our lives are incompatible.”

  “Are they now? And when did ye decide this, pray tell?” He scoffed. “I’d think having a wealthy benefactor to fund yer research would suit ye just fine. Just think of the expeditions ye could launch.”

  “And in exchange? What? I sleep with you?” Despite the lack of light, Cat was clearly angry. “Are you implying I should prostitute myself for my research?”

  “Of course not. Ye’re putting words in my mouth.” How did this get so out of control? All he wanted was to make her see sense. “I’m just trying to point out that our lives aren’t so incompatible.”

  “What I meant is that your relationships haven’t lasted longer than a month. I’m only going by your own track record, Iain. I’m sorry, but I can’t remain detached when it comes to you, and I’d rather not have my heart broken.”

  “Is it because ye’re in love with me?” He cursed himself for asking, and yet he waited without taking a breath, his heart all but stopping. “Why can’t ye just admit it?”

  “Why should I? It’s not like you have.”

  He burst out laughing, the weight on his chest lifting just a little. She hadn’t denied it. And that was all he needed for now. “I do love ye, Cat. Gods help me, but I do. Don’t even know how it happened. But it did. And before ye go saying anything, don’t. I know ye’re not ready, and when ye do tell me ye love me, I want it to be because ye mean it and it’s something ye’re comfortable with.”

  It looked like she was still mulling over his words—mulling over the fact that he’d declared his love her. When she spoke, she sounded short of breath, her next words nothing more than a pawn moved in the game they were playing. “You’re awfully sure of yourself, MacCraigh.”

  He had to smile. “Aye. Of some things, I am. Now let’s get us some dinner. I’m famished.”

  Without another word, he got out of the car and jogged over to get her door before she had a chance to exit. She too
k his offered hand but only after she glared at him. Yet despite her best attempts, there was no heat or anger behind it, and it only widened his smile.

  “This does not mean I’m in love with you, Iain.”

  “Of course not.” Unable to help himself, his smile stretched ear to ear.

  Angus answered the door, wiping his hands on a kitchen towel. “Took the two of ye long enough to get here. The food’s going cold.”

  “Ye’re like an old biddy when it comes to getting yer food on the table.” He clapped his friend on the back and followed him into the kitchen. “What’s for dinner?”

  “Steak and tatties, caramelized onions and garlic, with a side of sprouts that I pan-fried with bacon.” Angus always managed to whip together elaborate meals with ease.

  “Ye know, ye make me look bad when all I typically manage are fried eggs.”

  “Not my fault, is it?” Angus’s eyes danced with mischief as they fell into their comfortable routine of teasing each other. “Has the man not been feeding ye, Cat?”

  “As a matter of fact, he’s kept me well fed.” She looked around the kitchen, and Iain could tell she was impressed. Though Angus’s home wasn’t as large as his own, it certainly had ample room and Angus had done a great job of keeping the old details of the home while updating it with modern touches. “Angus, I won’t delay dinner any further, but when we’re done eating, you’re going to have to give me a tour of this place. It’s amazing.”

  “I’d be glad to.”

  With a bottle of wine opened and the food served, they sat down to an incredible meal. Conversation was kept light, and Iain was happy to see Cat enjoying herself. And yet… every time her gaze strayed in his direction, he saw a certain unease come over her, making him wonder if he’d pushed her too far, too soon.

  Angus pulled him from his thoughts. “Did I tell ye about Rowan? She’s a family friend, though I’ve ne’er met her—she’s from the States too. Anyway, she’ll be moving here in the next month or two. We’ve been emailing a lot, since I’m helping her get situated. Going to stay over at the Campbell cottage by the stones. Belongs to her Ma, though she’s not been back in decades and Rowan’s ne’er come to visit.”

  “Ah.” Iain had heard the stories of Iona Campbell. She’d moved away, pregnant and unwed. Seemed the daughter was now coming back to her roots. But there was more. If Iain had to guess, Angus was smitten with the lass. “So it’s Rowan, is it? And will ye be showing her around?”

  Cat thwacked him. “Leave the poor man alone. I think it’s sweet.”

  Iain linked his hand with hers and brought it to his lips. “That’s because ye’re a hopeless romantic, my dear.”

  She glanced in Angus’s direction before turning back to face him, suddenly looking like a fox being chased down by hounds. “No. I’m not. I’m practical, Iain.”

  Iain thought that if they hadn’t been in the middle of a dinner that took Angus so long to prepare, Cat would have bolted then and there. He was losing her again. He did his best to be honest about wanting to use the necklace as collateral and she’d understood, yet she was still skittish about him, and her past hurts were still clouding her judgment. Well, if she thought he’d be fool enough to let her go over her unsubstantiated fears, then she best think again.

  They loved each other—of that he had no doubt. He just had to make her see the truth of it.

  With his patience thin as spring ice over a lake, he rushed them through the rest of the evening, desperate to get her home so they could sort out the matter once and for all. He ignored Angus’s looks of suspicion and Cat’s looks of annoyance.

  He’d never had so little control over a situation. Not even with his brother’s mess. It was driving him to the edge—and Cat was the one responsible for their little rollercoaster ride.

  “What about dessert?” Angus immediately started to protest when Iain got to his feet and declared he and Cat would be calling it a night and heading home. “I made a trifle.”

  “Ye can bring it with ye tomorrow. Ye’ll be coming with us back to the tunnel?”

  “Aye. I’ll see ye first thing in the morning then.”

  ***

  “Cat… would ye hold up?” Iain knew she’d be angry with him for rudely dragging her away in the middle of dinner so they could sort out their problems, but he’d miscalculated her temper just a wee bit. Her silence during the car ride was only the calm before the storm.

  “What the hell was that about?” She stormed through the door, the moment he had it opened. Duncan, oblivious to the tension between them, wagged his tail and went after her.

  Well, Iain had a temper too, and he’d be damned if he wasn’t going to get this sorted out once and for all. “I thought ye’d be wanting to come home and pack. After all, ye’ll be high-tailing it out of here as soon as we find the necklace.”

  She spun on him, fury in her eyes. “You’re a jerk. You know that?”

  “Och, love. How could I forget it when ye remind me every chance ye get?” Iain scoffed at her with a shake of his head.

  Her cheeks flushed red. “I do not. And if the shoe fits…”

  “Ye know, ye contradict yerself at every turn. Ye say ye don’t call me a jerk, but they’re the next words out of yer gob. Ye kiss me and then say it ne’er happened. Ye get angry with me and want to leave, but then take me to yer bed. Well, I’ve had it, Cat. No more.”

  “Well, pardon me for making that mistake. And here I thought we were having fun.” She shrugged her shoulder with a tilt of her head, as if dismissing him.

  “Is that what ye call it? Fun?” The girl left him dizzy. “Listen to me, love. Ye have it so I don’t know which end is up anymore.”

  “How is that my fault, when I’m just falling in line with the life you’ve led?” She shook her head, her arms crossed in front of her chest, closing her off and putting even more distance between them.

  “I’m telling ye that’s no longer the case, Cat. Yet ye won’t let it go.”

  The tension in her body seemed to ease a little. “Our lives are too different, Iain, and we’re each going in different directions. We want different things.”

  “Do we? Well, I don’t think so, Cat.”

  “I need a real relationship—and let’s face it, you’re not the real relationship type. I just don’t think you can change, even if there’s nothing I want more.”

  “Is that what ye think? Well, let me prove ye wrong then. Marry me, Cat.” His heart was pounding in his ears and it felt like he couldn’t breathe, yet at the same time, it felt so perfectly right. He took her hands in his, ignoring the confusion written all over her face. “Cat, I love ye with all my heart and I know ye feel the same about me. Marry me, love.”

  She pulled her hands free and took a step away from him, anger creasing her brow. “Go away, Iain. You’re insane.”

  “Then be insane with me. Say yes.”

  Cat shook her head and sent a scathing glare in his direction. “I’m not even going to acknowledge your question with an answer. And you should be ashamed of yourself to be asking something so important with such casualness and disregard, just so you can prove your point.”

  Iain stepped to her side and wrapped an arm around her waist, ready to devour her with his eyes, his soul. “Trust me when I tell ye, love, I’d not ask ye to marry me if I didn’t mean it.”

  With a hand on his chest she slipped, wiggled and pushed her way out of his arms, as his smile widened, recognizing this as a game they’d played before. “You’re insane, Iain.”

  “Och, I’ll not deny this seems a bit mad, but I love ye, Cat.” He couldn’t help but smile, for he truly did love her, and all her quirky ways. He could already see her defenses melting, for he had no doubt they were meant to be together. “Say yes, love. I promise ye’ll not regret it.”

  As if shaking herself out of a trance, she stepped away from him. “I have to go.”

  “Go where?” Gone was his smile, now replaced by worry.

  �
��To the inn. I can’t do this right now. Most of my things are still packed, but I’ll pick up the rest tomorrow.”

  “It’s not safe, Cat, and ye know it. Have ye forgotten about the attack? And ye’re not going anywhere until we sort out what’s between us.” He ran a rough hand through his hair, surely making him look crazed.

  She sighed, and shook her head. “I can’t marry you, Iain. And trust me—you’ll thank me in the long run. You’re only going down this road because you see me as a challenge. I haven’t acted like the dozens of other women you’ve dated, so you jump to the conclusion that it must be love. Well, it’s not.”

  “Is that what ye really think?” Didn’t she see that she’d changed his entire world—had changed what he wanted from life?

  “I need to go. This is going nowhere, and doing neither of us any good. We can’t keep having this conversation.”

  “Only because ye ne’er sit down so we can sort it out. Ye’re constantly running scared, lass, and I’m trying to tell ye, ye have nothing to fear—not from me anyway.”

  “Oh, trust me. I have plenty to fear from you. You’re the only one making my life screwy, Iain. I was supposed to come here, find the Hope, write my paper to academic acclaim, and move on to my next project. Falling in love and getting married? Not part of the plan.”

  She turned to go, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her to him, his lips on hers, taking with wanton abandon, her protests melting in the heat of passion. “Marry me, Cat. I’m going to keep asking ye until ye say yes.”

  Their lips locked again, as he consumed her with his very soul, no longer needing breath as long as he had her.

  Between kisses she managed to get her response out. “I’m ignoring you, Iain MacCraigh. You asking that question? Never happened.”

  He let out a chuckle against her lips, lifting her off her feet as she wrapped her legs around his waist. “If ye say so, love.”

  By the time they made it to his room, he could barely string together a coherent thought—except that she had yet to push him away and was returning his passions. With every fiber of his being, he wanted her. With every breath. With every beat of his heart.