All She Wanted (Letting Go)

by Deese, Nicole

  “Money? Is that what this is about? You think you can control me because you still pay for some of my bills while I’m in school?”

  My arms waived wildly in the air as if they were no longer attached to my body. The explosion of rage going off inside me was unlike anything I had ever felt. I was losing it. The slow tick of a bomb that had been set months ago had finally found its mark.

  I could do nothing to stop it.

  “Charlie, please calm down. We understand that you’ve had a difficult season with the break-up and all, but we can’t sit back and watch you self-destruct any longer,” my mother said, adding to the conversation for the first time.

  “Don’t bring him into this, Mother!”

  “Why not? He’s at the crux of this whole charade, isn’t he? Your mother and I told you our thoughts on Alex the first time we met him, and yet you still chose to say yes to his proposal—against me, against our blessing!”

  I could hear the hurt in his voice, but I couldn’t bring myself to let it soak in. I carried too much hurt of my own to let anyone else’s in.

  “I know what you think of him, Daddy! But can’t you just for one, tiny minute, think about me? Think about what it was like for me to wake up to a note that left me without a fiancé, without the future I had planned with him? I loved him!” My hands shook as they covered my face. I felt a sob jolt through my entire body as I said the words again. “I loved him…and he broke my heart.”

  It was my mother’s arms that encircled me as I cried. The grief that washed over me felt as fresh as it had the day I found his note. The rejection was just as overwhelming. I heard my dad stand, and an instant later I felt his heavy hand on my shoulder.

  “We leave the day after tomorrow, Charlie. Briggs will stay above the garage, and you will follow the rules I have laid out for you while I’m gone.”

  He didn’t need to add anything else to his last statement. He was done with this conversation, and there was nothing I could possibly say to change his mind. He had no compassion when it came to Alex. He despised him, for reasons I did not understand. If anyone had the right to hate Alex…it should have been me.

  But it wasn’t.

  The night was long as I cried myself to sleep for the millionth time, my thoughts on the wedding that would have happened in just twenty-five days.

  Briggs

  Duffle bag in hand, I climbed the steps to the garage apartment. I still couldn’t believe I was actually going to be babysitting a twenty-one year-old. Who does that? I wasn’t a pushover, but saying no to Chief Max was like saying no to God…if I didn’t end up in the belly of a whale, it would be equally as consequential for me. I unlocked the door with the key Mrs. Julie had given me and opened it. The inside smelled like a mixture of lemon and pine. I looked around the large space and smiled in approval.

  Maybe this isn’t going to be as bad as I thought.

  The flat screen TV called my name, as did the couch and leather recliner. The kitchen was stocked with food, both in the pantry and the fridge, and the bedroom was larger than the current room I occupied at my shared apartment with the guys. There was a walk-in shower, double sinks and a closet that could have been called a spare room. I was all over this.

  Now to go and make nice with Chief’s daughter.

  I was sure we could reach a mutual understanding. As long as she agreed to follow the rules Chief had outlined, I would stay out of her way, and she could stay out of mine. It was simple.

  After putting my clothes away and flipping through a couple of sports channels (I needed to make sure everything was in proper working order), I headed down the stairs toward the house. I had seen a copy of the rules on the breakfast bar in my new apartment, but after glancing through them briefly, I figured this girl was old enough to sort them out on her own.

  I wasn’t some crazy dictator after all.

  I knocked on the house door several times. When no one came, I turned the knob. I assumed Charlie was home since I’d just come from the station. Chief Max had reminded me again before he left that if she was not doing office work at the station, she was to be at home or with me. Case closed.

  I walked inside, trying to make as much noise as possible.

  “Hello?” I called through the house several times. I tried to ignore the fact that I hadn’t been invited in.

  This is my job. I’m just doing my job.

  “Anybody home?”

  Okay…so she’s M.I.A on my first day.

  Awesome.

  I heard something then—coming from the back of the house. I made my way there slowly, still feeling more like a trespasser than an employed boarder. I reached a hallway that seemed to lead to the source of the sound. I stopped for a moment, listening.

  It was music: muffled notes of a piano, I was pretty sure.

  I walked down the hall until I saw a set of French glass doors that led into a room I’d never seen before when I had visited Chief Max’s home. A baby grand sat inside, on the middle of the hardwood floor. My eyes swept over the piano until I saw her, or at least a part of her.

  Charlie.

  Her hair was the color of strawberries and cream—the wavy locks falling just below her shoulders. As I made a move to knock on the glass, she jumped in her seat, startled by my presence. I took two steps back, though there was still a closed door between us. I didn’t want to scare her. She stared at me through the glass, as if calculating something, then slowly sauntered over and pulled it open.

  “So, you‘re the manny, huh?”

  Her face was…wow.

  Her face was wow.

  “I uh…the what, now?” I asked, my brain seemingly stuck on that one word: Wow.

  “The manny…the man-nanny?” She said again—slower, as if she was dealing with someone who’s elevator didn’t make it all the way up to the top floor. “You’re here to watch over me while my parents are off gallivanting in Greece, right?”

  Okay, so she’s funny.

  “Yes, I guess that would be me,” I said flashing a smile at her.

  “Great…well let’s get something straight, shall we? I don’t need a babysitter. I won’t cause you any trouble and you won’t cause me any either, that sound good to you?” she asked, batting her eyelashes.

  I was lost again momentarily in a sea of turquoise.

  Was that even a real eye-color? Turquoise?

  “Hello?” She waved her hand in front of my face, breaking the spell.

  “Uh, yeah. That sounds good and dandy to me. Your dad left a copy of the rules in my apartment,” I laughed casually, “So as long as you’re good on those…I don’t think there will be any issues.”

  “Perf,” she said.

  “Perf?”

  “Perfect…see ya around, Manny,” she said closing the doors and strolling back toward the piano.

  I stood there, dumbfounded.

  Well, that was easy.

  I walked back down the hall and out the front door, locking it behind me on my way out.

  Guess Chief Max is more paranoid than I thought. She seems reasonable enough.

  Back at my new headquarters I made a frozen pizza and watched the highlights on ESPN. With no one to wrestle me for the remote, and a kitchen stocked with my favorite foods, I decided I would relish every minute of living in this lone bachelor pad.

  I smiled to myself as I pulled the lever on the recliner.

  This could quite possibly be the best four weeks of my life.

  Chapter Two

  Charlie

  Well, that was easy.

  After finishing up some work on my latest compositions, I made my way upstairs. Careful to turn off all the lights in the house, with the exception of the interior hall bath, so it would appear the house was asleep.

  The house might be, but I’m sure not.

  I smiled at myself in the mirror. My black mini skirt and heels complimented the purple sequin tank I had on nicely. Though the weather was still fairly cool, the club would be humid fro
m all the packed-in bodies. I had texted Jackie earlier. Naturally, she was more than willing to assist me with my plan of escape. She was two years older than me, so technically this was our first time going out together since I had turned twenty-one. I hadn’t thought ahead enough to park my car away from the garage where the manny was staying, so she had agreed to pick me up at the end of the street.

  It was ten o’ clock; the night was young.

  Sasha had taken me to my first club—which was post-breakup. Though I’d always loved to dance, the idea of being around so many guys looking for a hook-up had kept me away from those scenes in the past. She assured me though, that as long as I was smart, I would be fine. So far that logic had proven true. I never accepted a drink from anyone, I never sat a drink down and returned to it later, and I only danced with the friends I arrived with.

  She had also taught me a few good lines to get a Pervy Pete to move on.

  I leaned into the mirror, painting on my lip-gloss before throwing my hair up into a twist. If I didn’t put it up now, it would be stuck to the back of my neck all night. I grabbed my purse and slowly crept down the stairs—realizing a minute later the absurdity of my stealth-like movements when no one was home. I exited through the side door, doing my best to stay in the shadows and avoid the moonlit areas of the driveway. I didn’t need Manny catching me on the first night of this hellish month to come.

  I made a beeline toward Jackie’s car, throwing my head back against the seat the second I was inside. My heart was racing. It was stupid to be this worked up—I was twenty-one for cryin’ out loud! I shouldn’t have to sneak-out anywhere. I forced my heart rate down, as Jackie laughed at me unabashed.

  “What’s got your panties in a bunch?”

  “Nothing. I just needed to get out of there. I’ve been stuck inside that house since I got here three days ago. Dancing sounds like heaven right about now.”

  “So who do they have playing the role of guardian over you while they’re away?”

  “Oh…just some guy from the station,” I muttered under my breath while she drove.

  “What? You’re hiding a hot fireman inside your house and you want to go out dancing?” She looked at me like I had just sprouted a third arm right before her eyes.

  “It’s not like that—he’s old and creepy.”

  Okay, so maybe that was a little far-fetched—or a lot.

  If I were being honest, he would fall on the opposite side of ugly when it came to the Hottie Spectrum, but I wasn’t going to be honest. I couldn’t be honest with Jackie, not with that type of information. She can think he looks like a warthog for all I care. If Jackie started coming around the house, I’d never have peace again. I’d witnessed her games with men many times, and I wasn’t interested in watching that for the next four weeks in my own home. No thanks.

  No man could resist the temptation that was Jackie. With her long, blonde hair and her model height, she was a Siren, calling to men without even having to open her mouth. Where Jackie went, men followed, and I didn’t need Mr. Manny what’s-his-name to be hanging around. In fact, I didn’t need him at all.

  “Bummer,” she sighed as she flipped her hair to the side.

  With the club in sight, I felt my body relax.

  This is just what I need: to lose myself in the beat of the music.

  Briggs

  It was nearly two in the morning when I awoke from my dead slumber.

  At first, I wasn’t sure why, but then I noticed the beacon of light streaming in through the bedroom window. I shielded my eyes against it, which was like trying to block the sun with a leaf. Stumbling out of bed, I made my way over to the glass and peered out into the darkness, beyond the spotlight. It had obviously been triggered by movement.

  I felt a cold chill cut through me as I rubbed at my eyes—taking in the sight with new interest.

  There, tip-toeing through the driveway in bare feet, heels in hand, was little Miss Strawberry Shortcake herself. I could practically see her cursing at herself as she tried to avoid the motion detector, but there was simply no place for her to hide. When she glanced my way, I ducked back into the shadows.

  “So daddy was right about you after all…well, two can play at this game, Shortcake,” I said to the empty room.

  Okay, now I’m talking to myself. That’s not crazy at all, Briggs.

  I went back to bed with my mind fully engaged. I should’ve known better than to trust a woman—especially one as strikingly beautiful as Charlie Lexington. She would most likely hate me by the end of this four-week stint, but that didn’t matter. Chief Max was counting on me. That was all that mattered.

  He’d given me a chance when he had hired me—taken a risk on me—one that frankly I hadn’t deserved. I was not about to let him down now.

  I was a lot of things, but a failure wasn’t one of them.

  Charlie

  The manny offered me a ride to the station in the morning, but I had politely refused. Gathering up the supplies I would need, I shoved each of them into my satchel before slipping my heels on. My black capris would make for comfortable work attire for the day, but I wasn’t about to dress-down my feet. Heels were about the only thing that made me feel older than a fourteen year-old. At barely five-foot, a girl had to do what she could.

  I layered a cardigan over my light-blue tank and made my way to the front door a second later. I smiled as I walked to my Chevy convertible. Though it wasn’t quite warm enough yet to have the top down, that day would be here soon. I loved to drive. It was one of my favorite things to do. Driving to my parent’s lake house with the top down, wind in my hair, was the very best way to spend a sunny afternoon.

  I sighed as the cool wind nipped at my exposed ankles. I cut my daydream short and hurried to my car, gearing myself up for one long, boring day.

  The station was just as I remembered it.

  I realized on the way over that I hadn’t been back since I was in high school. Even still, it hadn’t changed at all. The smell of rubber and disinfectant filled the air—a strangely comforting scent. I strolled in, ignoring the gawks and head-turns that followed me. Firemen weren’t my thing.

  I knew all about the life of a fireman: their priorities, their schedule, their sacrifice.

  No thanks.

  I made my way to my daddy’s office and unlocked the door. He had left a key for me next to one of the many “rule lists” back at the house. After putting the key in my pocket, I had trashed each copy of said list.

  I flicked on the light and looked in horror at the stack of files and paperwork he had taken out for me to organize and log into the computer.

  “You have got to be kidding me,” I grumbled.

  There seemed to be random stacks of paper covering every square inch of desk space—although with daddy, nothing was ever random. Next to each pile was a sticky-note detailing what he expected me to do with each type of file. I couldn’t help but wonder why, if he had taken the time to write each of these bright and annoying notes, couldn’t he have just logged the files himself?

  I put my satchel down and shut the door behind me. I would deal with the piles in time, but first, I would do a proper cleanup—my way.

  This, after all, would be my work environment for the next month. I might as well make it cozy.

  For the next two hours I cleaned—and by cleaned, I do not mean I broke out the Windex and dust rag. I simply mean I picked up trash, which he had obviously left for me—as per a bright pink post-it-note. I also moved several filing boxes, stacking them so as to open up the floor space even more.

  When I went to search his desk for a pen, I accidently pulled the top drawer out with too much force. Everything fell out—including a pile of his personal receipts, which I’m sure were in some kind of order prior to their current demise. When I stepped back to assess the new mess I’d just created for myself, I had to laugh.

  It looked like the aftermath of someone who had just come in and “made it rain”—that was one o
f Sasha’s favorite phrases.

  Too bad it’s receipts and not cash.

  I scrunched my nose up as I looked around. Something smells rank in here. Tomorrow I would bring candles—the air could really use some fresh and fruity.

  Toward the end of the day, I finally found the fowl-smelling contributor. As I looked behind one of the large metal file-cabinets, an old coffee mug lay on its side—a science project growing inside it.

  I trashed it—there was no way I was going to wash that nasty thing.

  Heaving a large, black hefty bag over my shoulder like Santa Claus in one of those freaky Tim Burton movies, I made my way through the station, heading for the dumpster.

  Briggs

  “I’m telling ya Kai…this girl’s a con artist,” I lowered my voice as I told him my latest conspiracy theory—only this one was completely factual.

  Kai smiled wide, “What? Are you afraid you may have lost your edge—nervous you can’t stay one step ahead of her?”

  I punched him in the chest. He laughed.

  “Of course I haven’t lost my edge! I am edge! She’s just-”

  I stopped mid-sentence, as every head around the lunch table seemed to turn at once, focused on something in the parking lot. My eyes followed suit.

  There she was, carrying a garbage bag that was wider than she was tall. Before Kai could comment, I was on my feet, trailing after her.

  “Can I help you out with that?” I called as I jogged over to her. I took the bag from her before she could protest and threw it into the dumpster—the dumpster which towered over her by at least two feet. Mathematically speaking, there was no plausible way she could have made that shot—unless of course, she possessed some secret Olympic high-jumping skill I wasn’t aware of.

  She flashed a quick smile, but before I could fully register it, it was gone.

  She took several strides in the direction of the station before throwing me a “thanks”, over her shoulder.

  “I was thinking we could order Chinese tonight? What do you say?” I called after her.