The Marriage Intervention

by Hilary Dartt

They both giggled.

  As they passed through the bathroom door and into the hallway of the third floor, Susie paused and put a hand on Josie’s arm. “Seriously, though. If it really is ancient history, talking about it can only help.”

  Is it really ancient history?

  Josie sighed. “I guess so. Thanks, Susie.”

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  Will I, or won’t I?

  Josie had asked herself the question countless times since Happy Hour on Thursday. She asked it when she walked past Scott Smith’s office Friday. She asked it during yoga class Saturday morning as she groaned her way into downward dog. She asked it Sunday afternoon when Paul watched the Suns game and she graded papers on the couch.

  Somehow the two of them managed to avoid any real conversations during the days that passed between her late arrival for their romantic evening and Monday morning when she left for work.

  Which meant the next time they’d talk would be at their appointment with Dr. Strasser that afternoon.

  When the bell rang to signal the end of the school day, Josie packed up her bag and left immediately, jogging down the stairs and breezing out, breathing a sigh of relief when she saw Scott on the phone in his office.

  She arrived in Dr. Strasser’s parking lot thirty minutes before their appointment, and worked on the rest of the week’s lesson plans until five minutes ’til four. Of course, Paul was already in the reception area, playing some game on his phone.

  “Hey,” she said.

  He didn’t look up. “Hey.”

  Josie sat down in the chair next to his. Still, he didn’t look up. Which was good and bad, she thought, because it gave her more time to consider whether she should talk about Scott during today’s session. She got out her own phone, opened FriendZoo, and feigned an interest in the lives of her acquaintances.

  If she did talk about Scott, the big elephant in the corner would finally stroll out of the room, leaving her marriage in peace. But Paul would be upset. She wouldn’t live it down for the rest of the school year and Paul would undoubtedly point out, daily, that she saw Scott daily and it made him uncomfortable.

  If she didn’t talk about Scott, she’d probably continue to think about him, to daydream about him and put him on some kind of sick pedestal where her romantic, er, impractical side believed his manipulation was a sign of his undying love for her. Forever. But Paul would never know, and would therefore never be able to hold it against her.

  Dr. Strasser opened the door to his office. He stood there for a moment, and Josie pretended not to notice him. She assumed he was assessing the way she and Paul sat there, without touching, speaking or acknowledging each other’s presence. She wondered what he’d make of that.

  She didn’t have to wonder long. Dr. Strasser cleared his throat, and Paul jumped. Dr. Strasser motioned for them to come into his office, and they both stood up. Paul stepped back to let her walk in front of him, and she took that as a positive sign.

  When they were settled, Dr. Strasser spoke.

  “I noticed the two of you weren’t speaking out there. Your body language suggests some tension.”

  Josie sighed, loudly, before she realized she was doing it. She glanced at Paul, and found him staring at her. Yep, he’d noticed.

  “It’s my fault,” she said.

  Might as well plunge in.

  “The other night, we were supposed to have a romantic evening in, and I was late getting home. Hypocritical, I know. Paul was pissed, went back to work and we haven’t spoken since. I mean, we’ve exchanged pleasantries, but that’s about it.”

  In the moment that followed her plunge, Josie could hear Dr. Strasser’s air conditioner running. She could hear the clock ticking. She could hear Paul breathing next to her.

  Dr. Strasser put his elbows on his desk and steepled his fingers, resting his chin on them. He looked at Josie for a span of time that felt longer than the final five minutes of the last school day of the year. His gaze flicked to her husband.

  “Paul? Give me your version of events.”

  “Same as she said. She was late. And hypocrisy really gets to me. I came home early, left my team out on a search warrant one man short. And she’s off having drinks with her boss. Talking about extracurriculars.”

  A spoon would have stood up in the word “extracurriculars.” Possibly even a shovel. Why did everyone make such a big deal of that?

  Again, Dr. Strasser let the silence breathe between them, the tension like oxygen to a flame. A dangerous one.

  You’re about to burn this shit up, Dr. Strasser.

  This would be a good time to mention her relationship with Scott. Talk about how she obliged him for drinks that evening because he said she broke his heart when she married Paul.

  Wait. That’s way too much information. Don’t say all that.

  She obliged him for drinks as a last hurrah. She obliged him for drinks because she didn’t know how to say no to his charms? Because he’d always been able to manipulate her?

  Hmmm… None of those options will come out quite right.

  “Why did you go for drinks with this … uh …”

  “Scott Smith,” Paul supplied.

  “Right. Scott Smith. Josie, why did you go for drinks with Scott Smith when you knew Paul was waiting for you?”

  Josie sighed again, then realized she sounded like a petulant teenager.

  “He asked me to join him so we could discuss some of my duties for next year, when I take over as principal. I didn’t expect it to take as long as it did.”

  “Why couldn’t you meet at the office? At school?” Paul wanted to know.

  They waited for her answer.

  “I— I don’t know,” she said, shrugging.

  Because Scott has always had a hold over me and I couldn’t say no.

  “Was this truly a mistake, Josie, or did you want to be late for your evening with Paul? Can you think of a reason you would have wanted to be late? Perhaps to get back at him for being late so many times in the past? Give him a taste of his own medicine?”

  He’s needling me! Is this what marriage counselors do? How the hell can Summer love this guy so much?

  “No, not at all,” she said. “Geez, I feel like one of my students when I’ve caught him with his hand in the treat jar behind my back.”

  “Did you have your hand in the treat jar, Josie?” Paul asked.

  Shit.

  “No!” Too insistent. Tone it down. “No. Bad analogy. I just meant that I feel kind of, you know, on the spot. It was just drinks with a colleague, that’s all. More time passed than I realized. Truly an oversight.”

  Then Paul said something that surprised her.

  “That Scott Smith has always held a flame for you, Josie. You know it as well as I do. A smart woman like you? If you didn’t notice, you’re playing dumb.”

  Josie didn’t answer.

  “Paul, you believing this Scott Smith fellow has feelings for Josie explains your anger over her being late after having drinks with him. Have you seen evidence of his feelings for her?”

  “I’m a cop. Observer of human behavior.”

  “Give us some concrete examples,” Dr. Strasser said.

  “You should see the way that man looks at her during staff parties. Like he wants to lick her like an ice cream cone.”

  Dr. Strasser raised his eyebrows.

  “I didn’t mean it to sound sexual,” Paul hurried to say. “I just meant he wants to eat her up.”

  He does. This would be a good time to ’fess up.

  “Josie? What’s your take on this?”

  She could practically feel Summer and Delaney, twin angels sitting on one shoulder, whispering, “Tell him, tell him!”

  “I—uh, I’m not sure.”

  “See?” Paul pointed at her and raised his eyebrows at Dr. Strasser. “She knows. She probably likes it.”

  “If I do, it’s only because he actually pays attention to me. He actually asks me for drinks. He actually talks to
me, Paul. He—”

  “He what, Josie?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Josie, I’m sensing you feel like you’re not getting the attention you want to from Paul.”

  Wow. Did you use your Mega Doctor Senses to make that observation?

  “That’s true,” she said.

  She glanced up at the clock. Only five minutes until the session ended. She could still slip in a confession. What was she confessing, exactly? That she’d had a relationship before she met Paul? Big deal.

  Only … it was a big deal. Because she saw Scott every single day and she’d never revealed it to her husband. And of course, the secret had just grown.

  “What could Paul do to show you the attention you want?” Dr. Strasser said.

  “Something,” Josie said. “Anything.”

  “Be specific.”

  “He could ask how my day was,” she said.

  “I do ask how her day was!” Paul said, pointing at her. “Every time I walk in the door.”

  “While looking at your phone. He doesn’t even make eye contact with me! He doesn’t even care how my day was. He just asks by rote.”

  “Now we’re getting somewhere,” Dr. Strasser said. “Do you see the breakdown here, you guys? Paul believes he is meeting your needs by asking how your day was. However, Josie doesn’t feel like you’re genuinely interested because you aren’t looking at her. Sound about right?”

  Josie nodded. Out the corner of her eye, she could see Paul nodding, too.

  Four more minutes.

  Dr. Strasser forced them to go through an exercise. They had to turn their chairs toward each other, look into each other’s eyes, and tell each other what they needed more of.

  Paul went first. Apparently, he needed Josie to be more understanding and supportive. He needed her to hug him more (Josie almost scoffed at this, since it was on Summer and Delaney’s list of The Rules for The Marriage Intervention). He needed to hear her say she appreciated him working so hard for them.

  Three more minutes. She could blurt it out now, before telling Paul what she needed more of.

  “I need attention. I need to feel like I take priority over your work. That’s it.”

  Dr. Strasser nodded.

  “Now I’d like each of you to explain precisely what the other could do to give you what you need.”

  “Look, before we finish this exercise, there’s something I have to say.”

  ***

  She hadn’t told them right away. She finally worked up the courage to spill her guts and Dr. Strasser stopped her. He made them finish the exercise first.

  By the time they were done, the session was over.

  But she wasn’t off the hook. Paul’s detective skills never rested unless he was looking for the ketchup in the fridge. His ears perked up when she tried to interrupt that final exercise. She could see it in his expression, in the way his lips pressed together and his eyes narrowed.

  He wouldn’t forget about it, and he wouldn’t just let it go.

  So when they walked out to the parking lot together, after she explained how she wished he could stay home when he got a call-out and he explained how he wished she wouldn’t ask him to stay home when he got a call-out (and how do you rectify that? she wondered), he stopped her before she could get into her car.

  “What were you going to say, before?” he asked.

  “Before what?”

  “You know. Before we finished our session with two completely contradictory requests.”

  He smiled at her and for a moment, she felt an uptick in her heart rate, just as she had when they first met, every time they made eye contact.

  Maybe that’s why I miss the eye contact so much. I miss feeling like this. Shit. Maybe Dr. Strasser’s onto something.

  She grinned back.

  “It’s nothing,” she said. “We can talk about it at our session next week.”

  “No,” he said. “We can’t. What was it? I could tell you were nervous. It must be important.”

  It’s now or never.

  “It’s about something that happened before we got together.” She cleared her throat.

  She always could read him, too, and she saw the knowledge roll into his eyes exactly the way a monsoon storm rolled into town on a summer day. Ominous, threatening, and eventually exploding.

  ***

  “You had a thing with Scott Smith.”

  Paul was a good cop. So good, in fact, that his supervisors had already begun grooming him for a sergeant detective position. Just a few weeks ago, he completed a training on interview and interrogation. He loved it. Came home raving about it. He may be a good cop, but Josie saw him mentally slip into the bad cop interrogator role the instant he announced his revelation.

  When Josie didn’t answer, Paul leaned against the driver’s door of her car and crossed his arms. She wasn’t going anywhere. Neither was he.

  “So. Tell me about it.”

  Josie felt the blood whirring through her body, whooshing in her ears.

  Why am I so nervous? It’s over.

  She licked her lips, shifted her weight from her right foot to her left.

  “There’s not too much to tell, really,” she said. “We met several weeks before school started that year, and ended things on the first day of school.”

  Never mind the fact that I broke down and cried at recess and after school every day for a week.

  “Why did you end things?”

  “He was my supervisor.”

  “So?” He didn’t give her time to answer. “Why are you so nervous?”

  “What? I’m not.”

  “You keep licking your lips.”

  Josie pressed her lips together.

  “See? It’s a nervous habit,” he said. “So why are you nervous? You still have a thing for this guy, or what?”

  “Fine,” she said. “I am nervous! I’m nervous, Paul, because you’re interrogating me. I’ve known all along that if you knew Scott and I had a fling, you’d hate that I was seeing him every day. You’d ask me about it all the time, you’d want to know why I wore a certain skirt or certain shoes.”

  He seemed to consider that for a moment, and then he nodded.

  “Probably. You’re right. I would do those things. But what am I supposed to think now, after you spent an afternoon having drinks with the asshole, discussing extracurriculars? It all seems very suspicious. Especially when it was your idea to work on our marriage. Or whatever. You know what? I’m calling bullshit. You’re probably using this marriage counseling thing as a decoy so you can keep rubbing elbows, or whichever body parts, with Scott.”

  “Absolutely not!” Josie said. “I just went to have drinks with Scott because he asked me to. Excuse me if I’m susceptible to actual attention from a man, since I get absolutely none from you.”

  “Oh, don’t you dare turn this around on me. This is so completely your fault.”

  “My fault? My fault? Now we’re placing blame? What is my fault, exactly, Paul?”

  “It’s your fault this marriage is where it is right now. You’ve obviously got one foot in the grave, here, and one foot in Scott Smith’s office. And you have since we got together. We were doomed from the start.”

  “That’s not true!”

  Josie heard her voice approaching the shrill wail of a siren, and took a deep breath to calm herself.

  “That’s not true,” she said again. “It was over with me and Scott before I even met you.”

  “If it was, you wouldn’t have been so nervous to talk to me about it. You wouldn’t have hidden it all this time.”

  She had nothing to say to that.

  “You have nothing to say to that, do you?” Paul said.

  “Ugh.” She rubbed a hand over her forehead.

  Paul stepped aside so she could get into her car.

  “I guess we’re done here,” he said. “And you’re on your own with Dr. Strasser from now on. I don’t want to waste my time.”

  CHA
PTER FIFTEEN

  Josie felt as if the wind had been taken out of her sails. She blamed life, her husband and Scott.

  Once Paul moved away from her car, he got into his own and drove away. He probably planned to get in some target practice while she was at the gym with Summer and Delaney. They were supposed to meet at home for dinner in a couple of hours, but now she had no idea whether he’d show up.

  With country music blasting, Josie pulled out of Dr. Strasser’s parking lot and drove toward the gym, even though it was the absolute last place she wanted to go.

  Everything Paul said was true. Since that first time she met Scott, he had a hold over her. There was just something about him. There was always that question in the back of her mind: “Is he my soul mate?”

  It was foolish of her to deny it.

  She hit a red light and pounded her fist on the steering wheel, then turned up the music.

  Despite the fact that she’d always had Scott in the back of her mind, she chose Paul. Didn’t that mean something?

  Or did it mean nothing, since Scott had been the one to end their relationship? Would she have continued dating him if he hadn’t ended it?

  At the intersection of Highway Twenty-Three and Pinecone Road, where Delaney had met Jake, Josie should have turned right to meet the girls. She turned left instead. She knew she’d pay for it later, when Summer and Delaney held her accountable, or whatever they were calling it these days, but for now she relished the thinking time. She needed it.

  ***

  Old Copper Mine Highway wound up into the mountains that stood guard around Juniper, twisting and curving, forcing Josie to drive like she imagined a race car driver would.

  She pulled off at a lookout point, from which she could see the velvety green of the pine trees unrolling below her.

  Nothing but quiet out here.

  Yes, Josie would love a little more attention from Paul. She would love a little more eye contact. She would love to feel like a priority. She wanted him to choose her over his work for once, to act like it was a possibility rather than just slipping into that default position.

  “Ugh,” Josie said when she realized she was actually crying.