Role of a Lifetime: Out of Hollywood Romance

by Cora Davies

  Risa sat on the back of the couch, photograph in hand. "So he worked with dad and said they stole that diamond? Why? Dad wouldn't do anything like that. He was too..."

  "Perfect? No one is perfect, not even your father." Hailey felt like this was a moment that was supposed to come much later in a child's life. That moment when Risa would discover on her own, just because someone became a parent did not make them a saint. No matter how hard many parents attempted to prove they were without fault, no one was.

  Risa studied her own hands as if she had never seen them before. As if the lines, creases, and bends were all new. Just gifted to her last night. Risa looked older than her seventeen years as she tipped her head back and looked at Hailey with tears shimmering over her blue irises. But Hailey refused to cry, and for the first time, it was not in order to stuff her feelings inside of a box and prevent the darkness from leaving. But she did it to be strong for Risa. She let Risa cry on her shoulder, and she let the darkness fall from her daughter's face to stain Hailey's sleeve. She was the mother. The love. The home, then the changer of diapers, then the kisser of booboos, then the chauffeur, then the curfew enforcer. She would be the one to take care of it all until Risa no longer needed her. Hailey was strong without her emotions, and now she would be stronger still with them.

  "Jason's an asshole!" Risa cried into Hailey's sleeve.

  "An absolute asshole."

  "Poor Grandma!"

  "I know, I haven't figured out how to tell her." Hailey's heart sunk every time she thought about her mother, about what she would say when she found out what happened. But she did not want her daughter to worry about it. "Tell me, what you were going to tell me before Risa. About Turner. How do you know what happened?"

  "Oh," Risa said as she wiped the tears from her face. Still sad about the deception from the man she had started to think of as a grandfather, but Hailey could tell she was excited to share whatever news she was holding onto. "The police came for him last night at the party."

  "He was at the party?" Hailey asked, her heart thumping harder. She knew boys would be there, but she had not considered Turner might be there. Of course, any boy could be like Turner. The only difference was Turner had been caught.

  "Yeah, but everyone was. It wasn't supposed to be that big, but the twins know, like, everyone..." Risa walked back around the couch and sat down on the couch, and Hailey followed her.

  "So anyways," Risa said sarcastically, probably hoping Hailey would not interrupt again. "They came and got him, and today we found out it was because an envelope was delivered to the police station full of photographs of him doing the same thing... raping... another girl. They went to her family first, and they decided to press charges."

  "Did that really happen? Or was it just a rumor?" Hailey knew rumors spread like wildfire in this tiny town like this, especially amongst teenagers.

  "No, it really happened!" Risa said and Hailey hoped she was right, and not just emotionally involved and too hopeful. The two sat side by side on the couch in the silence, looking at the dust dancing in the air like tiny sea creatures in the ocean. Eric reappeared and leaned against the kitchen doorframe, beer bottle in his hand.

  Hailey drummed her fingers on her thigh and looked at Eric, searching his expression for the truth. Ever so slightly, and if she blinked she would have missed it, but Eric shrugged. It was a quick jerky movement, but Hailey read the world in that one movement. He had told the PI about Turner, and he had run a check on him.

  "Just this one time," she muttered, but she smiled at him, terrified, as the world seemed to melt away from the room. It was only the three of them.

  "Did you do it?" Risa asked.

  "I don't know what you're talking about." Eric took a drink from his beer and made a slight face. Hailey choked back a laugh. Eric apparently was not used to a case for twelve dollars type of beer. It was actually Jason's, but she was not going to say anything.

  Risa took a step toward Eric, placed her hands on her hips, and jutted her chin out as she looked up at him. She looked like a small child next to him, and Hailey felt something inside her call for Paul. It was not for Hailey, she did not need him. At least, at this moment, she did not need him, but Risa did. She would always need her father, and because he had made the ultimate sacrifice for Risa's life, she would not have him. He had given up his innocence the day he decided he would choose Risa's life over someone else's. Hailey would have to make the decision to not give up Risa's innocence for the same fight. A fight that had been over for years.

  "If you turn into a fucking psychopath and hurt my mom, I'll find someone to get evidence on you, and I'll mess your world up."

  Hailey bit the side of her cheeks as Eric looked, gaze ambling from Risa to Hailey and back again. He cleared his throat, opened his mouth to speak, then as if thinking better of whatever he planned on saying, he slammed his mouth shut. Eric smiled, weakly, but winked at Hailey as Risa looked back at her mother for a split second. When Risa turned back to him, he nodded with large eyes. "Miss Risa, I promise to always protect your mother, and not once will I turn into a fucking psychopath."

  Risa nodded at him, but looked suspicious. Hailey could not blame her, after all, she had inherited her suspicions for others from Hailey. Her darkness came from both her and Paul, though. Risa hugged her mother, grabbed her backpack, and sprinted up the stairs to her bedroom. When the door slammed and her music blasted through the walls, Eric reached out for Hailey's hand and pulled her into the kitchen behind him.

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  "Do you want to call your mom?"

  She shook her head. "No, I need to wait and tell her when she gets back. I can't tell her this kind of stuff over the phone."

  Eric absently nodded and pulled Hailey into him. Her face pressed against his hard chest, and he bent his head down to meet hers. His tongue pierced her mouth, and Hailey felt like she could never have enough. Eric's hand was already straying up her thigh over her jeans, and she felt herself dampen at his touch. How long would this last? How long would he want her this badly? How long before his touch no longer shot electricity through her body like a rough current? He broke away from her mouth, and found her earlobe.

  "I don't understand how you do this to me," he said against her ear.

  "Do what?" she moaned.

  "This." Eric grabbed her hand and brought it to the hard line that had formed in his pants. "There are just certain looks you give me, and here I am. Full attention, ready to go. How the hell do you do that?"

  "Maybe I bring out the irresponsible man in you." She placed her hands on his chest, his arms wrapped around her waist, bringing her in closer. "The one that just wants to have fun all day?"

  "No, I've always been the one who wants to have fun all day," he muttered. "You're just a fucking magnet."

  "I've never been called that before." She grabbed a fistful of his shirt and pulled him out the kitchen door, down the steps, and into the new rubber storage shed, grateful the junk transfer from the old shed had not happened yet. The only objects in the room were a new workbench and a rubber storage box. Her hands found the button of his pants and worked at them while his mouth traveled to her neck.

  "Are you sure we should leave Risa alone inside?" he asked pulling back for a moment.

  "The alarm is set, and she won't remember we're alive for at least an hour," Hailey said. "Besides, if you're going to be staying around for a little bit, we're going to have to find time and space when and where we can get it. It's what parents all over the world have to do."

  Eric seemed to need no more encouragement, and she smiled when she heard his pants hit the floor. His hands were back on her, undressing her and within seconds, his hardness landed heavily against her stomach. Her body began to tingle at the anticipation. He picked her up and set her on the workbench, the steel cold underneath her body.

  His hand was on her mound, and his body was hovering over her. "You're already wet. Dirty girl." He nipped at her mouth, her n
eck, and traced a trail of kisses down to her breast. His hand was on her warmth, stroking softly at the outside without parting her. Without penetrating her. The promise made her want to cry out, but she knew she had to remain quiet.

  "Please, touch me," she whispered as he pulled her nipple between his front teeth, gently biting while he sucked the rough skin.

  He broke away for a moment to ask, "Where? Here?"

  He separated her with his fingers and allowed her to be fully exposed. He did not make any further movement. Her body yearned for the connection, now that she had come to terms with her feelings. Now that she knew she wanted this to last. She wanted to feel as if they were one. "Oh my god, please. I want you inside me. Your fingers, your cock, I don't care which. I just need you inside me."

  His hands gathered hers and pulled them above her head, pressing them against the cork wall behind the workbench. "I've noticed you're used to being the one in control, aren't you? You're never afraid to say what's on your mind, or tell others what to do."

  Hailey felt the pressure of his shaft against her and grew excited at its length as he slid against her wetness, stroking her peak. She shifted her hips and attempted to push his cock into her waiting hole as her body cried out for the connection. But he shifted again. She pulled her hands to release herself from his grip, but he did not let go. "I don't have to be in control."

  Eric laughed as she squirmed her hips again, feeling the pressure of his mushroom tip against her sensitive peak. She was ready for him, so ready.

  "You're never afraid to say what's on your mind, until you are afraid. Until it will open you up too much." Eric's mouth was against her ear, his breath hot as he spoke. "Open up, Hailey. Tell me."

  "Tell you what?" Hailey felt her nipples tight and tingling as he traveled to them again with his mouth.

  "Tell me what I want to hear. What you're holding back," he whispered hotly against her nipple.

  "I love you," she whispered. He did not move from her breasts, he acted like he had not heard her. She said louder this time. "I love you."

  He bit her nipple, tugging the taut skin between his teeth and flicking the tip with his tongue, before letting go. He rested his forehead against hers. "I had my suspicions. I love you, too Hailey."

  His mouth was rough against hers with a possessive kiss she had only ever felt from him. His grip on her hands tightened as if he wanted to remind her he was not going anywhere. He broke their mouth's connection.

  "Sometimes, you're going to just have to relax and let me take the lead. Not all the time, I don't have the energy for all the time. But I need you to trust me, to believe me, and to let me," Eric whispered into Hailey's ear as he finally thrust his swollen head into her body. She held back the cry and instead panted heavily. She felt her nipples drag against Eric's chest as he moved steadily against her. "You'll have to let me take the lead and make the decisions every once in a while."

  She felt so good as his full length penetrated her body, Eric moving slowly, inch-by-inch until she thought she could take no more. She tried to talk to him, but a strangled sound came out of her mouth instead.

  "We're both led around so much by the people who think they know best for us," Eric whispered around a groan as he found their natural rhythm, and finally released Hailey's wrists. "We have to go into this having each other's backs. Us against the world. But that means sometimes, you're going to have to let me be the one to tell you what to do."

  He pulled Hailey to her feet and flipped her around so she leaned over the workbench. Hailey panted as Eric spread her legs, and thrust himself back inside of her. The angle allowed him to force his cock deeper into her canal than ever before. He grabbed her breasts, and Hailey pushed slightly off the workbench. He massaged her and twisted her beaded nipples between his fingers. She felt her body twitch as she neared climax, and held back a scream of pleasure that surfaced as he began to violently drive into her. She felt as though her world was being split in two, but that the man behind her would catch her and put her back together when they came out on the other side.

  Climax almost seemed to come simultaneously, their bodies jerked against each other, Eric's hands became like vices against her breasts. She felt his grip loosen as his body slowed down. The only parts of them still moving were their chests as they struggled to find their natural breaths. "If that is one of the things you want to be in control of Eric, it's all yours. You're like the, sexpert."

  "That is a terrible joke," he said into her neck. He was still inside of her, still huge, still pulsing. Hailey felt his body hard against her back as she simply waited for him to let go, and almost prayed that he did not.

  ***

  It was late that night, but Hailey and Eric were still awake. Lying in bed talking about everything and anything under the sun. Eric had told her stories about growing up rich but unloved and ignored by his family. Hailey told him stories about how it was to grow up in a lower working class family where meals were never expected, but a story at bedtime was expected. Eric told her where he sent his mind during different scenes he was acting out, and she told him where the inspiration for each of her books had come from.

  She told him about her climb to publication, which was a lot tougher than his climb to his first role. She told him about Gretel, and how passionate the agent was about Hailey's novels, how she would always have her back. Eric told Hailey how he had ended up with Luca as an agent, and no matter how slimy the asshole was, he was with him for life.

  They talked about their dreams and nightmares. Their disappointments in the world and with themselves. And finally, when they were so tired their eyes were tiny slits and their voices were only a murmur, Eric asked about Paul.

  "Tell me about Paul," Eric said trailing his finger down Hailey's collarbone as she turned to face him.

  "What do you want to know? I feel like you should know everything after reading the book. After reading the file." Though Hailey had decided she would forgive and forget about the file, the word still brought a nasty taste to her mouth.

  "I don't know, just tell me some things. Tell me what love with him felt like." Eric looked deep into Hailey's eyes, and she was once again stunned by the flecks of amber hiding in them.

  "Love with him was like something I've never experienced, before or after. For a long time, I didn't even think I could fall in love again. I thought I had used it all up with him." Hailey blinked and a single tear rolled down the side of her face. "With him, it was like the world was unconnected to us. It was just us on an island. And then Chrissy came along and it was even more magnificent. He should have lived forever; he was a good man, so much better than he should have been with the way he was raised. With a father like that."

  It was a line Hailey had said a thousand times. She did not know if she completely believed it anymore. Not with the new information she had found out about Paul from his final deployment.

  "Now I know, he wasn't as perfect as I thought he was. I don't know if that is going to taint everything I feel, every memory," Hailey squeezed her eyes shut tight. She did not want to cry anymore today.

  "Nobody's perfect, I still have problems, some issues I have to fix," Eric said quietly. She was sure he was talking about his drug abuse; something they had not dove into deeply during their talks. Something they had to address, if they were serious about making this work.

  "But I'm coming into this relationship knowing you, knowing the truth. That makes a difference." Hailey touched her hand to Eric's chin and lifted his face. She looked into his eyes, trying to give the same penetrating stare Eric did. Trying to show him she was as capable of believing in him, as he had shown her. "I can help you. I stand by you and help you change."

  Eric cleared his throat and looked away. They would have to talk about it soon. Tomorrow.

  "So you believe you can love again? But it's different?" Eric sounded sad, and Hailey wanted to comfort him. But she had only the truth.

  "We were together for twelve years. He
was the father of my child." Hailey touched the empty spot on her finger that used to hold her wedding ring. "I don't know what's in store for us in the future. But right now, I can tell you that I love you, Eric."

  Eric rolled over and kissed Hailey on the tip of her nose. "I love you, too."

  "Eric," Hailey said, suddenly sitting up on her elbows. "What was the boombox for?"

  "It seems so silly now," Eric said tossing a pillow over his face. Hailey immediately tore it off and hopped on top of him, pinning his legs down to either side.

  "Eric."

  "Okay, well, I thought... it's really dumb, but I thought..." Eric took a deep breath. "Did you know you have kind of this weird obsession of music-for someone who doesn't play any instruments or isn't a teenager or roadie?"

  "No I don't," Hailey said, but somewhere in the back of her head, she realized it might be a little true.

  "You do. But that's okay, because I have an obsession with 80s movies." Eric smiled sheepishly. Hailey had a thought.

  "Say Anything? The boombox scene?" She smiled.

  "Yeah, I even had a few mixed CDs put together with Green Day, Nirvana, Hole, Smashing Pumpkins, Stone Temple Pilots. You know..." Eric rolled his eyes. "All the romantic girly music you listen to."

  "That is highly romantic," Hailey whispered, and she meant it. It felt like the most romantic thing anyone had ever done for her. Even, if Eric never got to actually carry it out. "Can we listen to the music?"

  Eric rolled off the bed and headed to the corner of Hailey's room where he had piled all the stuff he had brought with him. He brought out the boombox, raised it over his head as high as he could without hitting the ceiling and pressed play. Hailey felt tears well up as Green Day poured through the speakers. A little loud at first, but Eric turned it down, then returned the boombox above his head.