Polly Brown

by Tricia Bennett

  “Napoli, help me before this stuff swallows me up!” she screamed.

  Napoli turned, and on seeing Polly trussed up in swathes of cotton candy, he rushed over and began to cut away the thick and sticky pink strands that were engulfing and threatening to entirely consume her. Once Polly had been freed, she hurriedly placed another pebble inside the shoe. She then swung it high above her head before releasing it.

  “Take this you silly, soppy, sentimental, disconnected drainpipe!” she yelled.

  “You forgot to mention ‘double-decker’!” Napoli shouted back in her direction.

  Polly looked quizzed.

  “You meant to say, ‘you seelly, soppy, sentimental, double-decker, disconnected drainpipe!’” yelled Napoli.

  “Oh,” was all the time Polly had to reply to Napoli’s rather pompous correction as she watched her pebble fly through the air in the direction of the terrifying beast.

  “Bingo!” she screamed excitedly as her pebble tore straight through the dragon’s chest on impact.

  “Bingo!” shouted Napoli as the dragon looked down at the gaping hole where its heart normally beat before slumping to the floor.

  As it collapsed it made a most terrifying noise that forced Polly to stick both fingers in her ears. Once on the floor, its flesh began to peel away, leaving nothing but its skeletal frame. Then this too shriveled up. Polly watched in horror as she witnessed its terrifying features return to the face of Soogara before becoming little more than a skull with huge, dark eye sockets and a pile of decrepit bones lying beside it.

  “Well done, mon cherie,” said Napoli, focusing his attention on his severely injured leg, which was now bleeding profusely.

  “Here, Napoli, allow me to help you,” said Polly, as she zealously opened her survival book, frantically searching for the section that dealt with near-fatal injuries.

  “It says here that ‘open wounds are at risk from infection,’ so we must bind that wound immediately,” she instructed in a most assertive and matronly manner. “It also says ‘foreign bodies must immediately be extracted, preferably with sterile tweezers.’ Now do you think you have any foreign bodies in there?” Polly asked as she bent down to take a closer inspection of the wound.

  “Do not insult me, Polly. I have never ’ad anee foreign bodees in my being, and I never weel, for I am 100 percent pure French. Foreign bodees indeed…,” he muttered, feeling very miffed.

  “Whatever,” sniffed Polly, refusing to be offended by what she perceived as reluctance on his part to graciously accept her help. “Now Napoli, it says here that we must clean and irrigate the wound before we bandage it up,” she said sternly. “I don’t suppose you have any alcohol on you, for this will do the trick. So own up, do you have any?”

  “Yes, I do have some French Brandy in my breast pocket, for I like to ’ave thee occasional tipple,” Napoli rather sheepishly admitted.

  “Good, then we’ll use that to stop any infection spreading, and then we will use my sling to bandage your wound. Is that all right with you?” she asked, not waiting to hear his reply.

  Napoli reluctantly submitted himself to Polly’s very basic nursing skills, for having survived fiendish wolves and demonic dragons he felt he could survive anything!

  As soon as Polly had finished bandaging his leg, he stood up from the ground to test whether he could still walk. As he hobbled across the floor he announced, “I theenk you may ’ave bound it too tightly, Polly, and eef that is thee case, then my blood flow will become restricted with verree disastrous consequences.”

  “Oh dear,” said Polly, feeling very alarmed. “You might just be right, so come back and sit down so I can loosen it for you.”

  As Polly fussed over him, Napoli seemed far more concerned about the large gashes to his trousers.

  “My breeches are utterly ruined,” he cried as he attempted to lift himself up from the stone floor only to find Polly pushing him back down.

  “Hang on a minute, young man. I just need you to answer some questions,” she said in a suitably stern voice.

  “Look, Polly, eef I remain on thees cold, stone floor much longer, in no time at all I weel be suffering from the flu as weel as painful piles,” he moaned.

  “Don’t worry, this won’t take too long. Honest,” she said looking him directly in the eye in her attempt to reassure him.

  Napoli’s face showed that he remained unconvinced.

  “Right, question one. Are you suffering from shock?” she asked, still staring at him eyeball to eyeball.

  “No, I don’t theenk so,” replied Napoli.

  “Well, we had still better go through the list just to make sure,” Polly quite rightly insisted. “Are you cold and clammy?”

  Napoli shook his head most resignedly.

  “Are you dizzy or faint?”

  Again he shook his head, but by now he was beginning to get a little irritated. “Polly, I theenk you are being just a leettle pedantic. I’m perfectlee fine, so pleese let me get up from thees floor,” he groaned.

  Still Polly continued to ignore his pretty reasonable request and carried on her thorough examination. “Have you a shallow or rapid pulse?”

  Yet again, he wearily shook his head. “Polly, these ees worse then thee Spaneesh Inquisition!” he bitterly complained.

  “Stay perfectly still. There’s a good boy,” she instructed as she took hold of his wrist and checked for his pulse before moving on. “Are you vomiting or unconscious? No, I think I can safely discount that one,” she said dismissively as she turned the page of her book. “Is your skin pale or has it grayish tones?” she asked, studying his face as she briskly continued on with her interrogation. “Hmm…I think we can discount the grey area around your bristly chin, Napoli, don’t you think? You say you’ve always looked that color. Well then, let’s move on. And finally, have you lost any of the color in your lips?” she asked, studying his mouth as she spoke. “No, I think we can say with much certainty that they are still a very nice deep pink. There, I think we’re done. Napoli; your health check is complete,” Polly declared in a very self-satisfied manner as she rather dramatically slammed her book shut.

  Napoli was very relieved as it meant he could now get up from the floor, assuming that Polly found no extra information in her book that necessitated further interrogation.

  “Thank you very much, Miss Polly Pedanteec,” said Napoli with a wry smile as he struggled to get back on both feet.

  “Pleasure’s all mine,” Polly replied as she helped him to his feet.

  Suddenly they could hear gentle moans coming from the other side of the room. “Quick, Napoli, I think that Dodo is finally coming around,” said Polly excitedly.

  Both of them rushed over to where Dodo lay still tied up and crouched down beside him.

  “Where am I?” Dodo asked, giving a faint smile.

  “Shhh, you are in a castle, Dodo, and we’ve just been rescued,” explained Polly.

  Napoli produced some smelling salts from his breast pocket and waved them under Dodo’s nose. Dodo coughed and spluttered as he inhaled the frightfully offensive smell that the salts produced. The good news was that within minutes he was able to sit up, and Napoli could cut the cords that had bound him. Dodo was very grateful to Napoli, especially when he heard all that had taken place while he had been unconscious.

  “How are you feeling, Dodo?” asked Polly, at the same time laying a comforting arm around his shoulders.

  “Well, I’m better than what I was, but I’m not as good as what I was before I got as bad as what I am now,” said Dodo with a faint smile as he ran his fingers through his crumpled locks.

  “Well, I think it might be a good idea if I run through my book and give you a full and thorough medical health check.”

  “Oh no, Polly!” gasped a very distraught Napoli. “Pleese do not open your book again, otherwise we weell still be ’ere well into the next centuree,” he pleaded, at the same time giving Dodo a quick and very sly nudge in the ribs to ge
t his support.

  “I’m feeling fine, Polly; honest, I’ve never felt better,” Dodo insisted.

  “I theenk you must take hees word for that, Polly,” said Napoli, as he proceeded to cut the ball and chain from around Langdon’s neck before retrieving the missing part of his trunk, as well as fragments of his curly tail and clumps of his faded blue fur. “And you would do weel to put all Langdon’s bodee parts into your schoolbag for safetee,” said Napoli, as he tried to console a very unconsolable Polly. “And then perhaps wee can patch him up at a later date,” he said gently handing Polly the remains of her blue friend. “And now my friends, wee reallee must hurree along and leave here before anything else unforeseeable happens,” said Napoli with the authority of a general in command.

  Polly and Dodo readily agreed.

  “There’s no way I intend to stay around and clear this mess up,” she said loftily as her eyes scanned the bloodstained floor littered with the headless corpses of the dogs, “but I must retrieve my collection of pebbles and my lovely diamond.”

  She then walked around the dungeon picking up the pebbles and popping them back in her bag for safekeeping. As Polly went about the task of gathering up her pebbles, she noted that the pebble that had miraculously transformed itself into a diamond was once more nothing but a smooth pebble. “Oh well, never mind,” was all she thought as she popped it into her bag along with all the others.

  “Come along, Polly. Wee must leeve ’ere immediately,” Napoli urged as he helped Dodo to his feet. Then with an arm around his shoulder, he continued to prop him up as he headed towards the door of the dungeon. Polly nodded and then smiled to herself as the sight of both of them hobbling along like old men seemed to amuse her.

  Once outside the castle, Napoli helped them climb onto the back of his horse before he too climbed up. After placing his feet into the stirrups, they galloped away from the castle as fast as they could.

  Finally, when they believed they were safe and well out of harm’s way, Napoli helped them down from his horse and they all took a much-needed rest under an old oak tree.

  “Napoli, do you have anything we can eat?” Polly rather hopefully asked. “I for one am extremely hungry.”

  Napoli walked over to where his faithful steed stood and produced a tin lunchbox from his saddlebag. “Yes, I do beleeve I ’ave enuff food for the three of us, for my mother always packs much more than I can ever eet,” he said with a big grin. “Right, let’s see, what do wee ’ave here? Ahh yes, I ’ave almost a whole tin of escargots. Would you both like to try some?”

  “How nice, but tell me, Napoli, tell me in English, what exactly they are,” Polly politely asked, recoiling slightly as she peered inside his large tin.

  “Snails, and they are quite delicious.”

  “Snails!” she squealed. “Oh, how grim! No, I don’t think I want any of those, thank you, Napoli,” she said as politely as she was able.

  Dodo declined his kind and generous offer with equal adamance.

  “Weel, I also ’ave some quiche,” said Napoli, opening up another brown paper bag, “although I ’ave to say that it looks pretty shriveled up and very unappetizing,” he said flatly. “However, feel free to try a peece, for eet will still taste veree delicious.”

  “Yes, please, I don’t care what it looks like, for I’m absolutely ravenous,” admitted Polly, licking her lips in anticipation.

  “Bon appetite, my leetle friends,” said Napoli with a smile, handing them both a piece of the sorriest looking quiche. They both gratefully accepted the food and hungrily devoured it in a matter of seconds.

  “Your mum makes great quiche, Napoli,” said Polly with a smile, “but then the French are supposed to be excellent cooks, aren’t they?”

  “Yes, they are considered to be probablee thee best in thee world,” replied Napoli proudly. “But they are also brilliant warriors and strategists, and so weeth thees in mind, I must bid you both farewell and go on my way to catch up weeth Old Welligog. Now Polly, please remember that thee crossroads are just over that hill, so hopefullee you won’t get lost,” he said pointing in a northerly direction as he mounted his faithful and trusted steed.

  “Good-bye, or rather ‘au revoir,’ Napoli, and thank you again for all your help,” she said warmly as she sidled up to where he now sat high upon his horse and raised her hand to shake his. “Oh, and do remember my suggestion of tea and Victoria’s sponge cake. It’s a whole lot cheaper than another long and bloody war. Trust me on this one,” she whispered as she gave him a wink.

  Napoli smiled back, but was prevented from giving any response to her helpful reminder, as before he had time to open his mouth and utter a word Polly had thought of something extra to add.

  “Anyway, I do think it’s about time we English and French buried the hatchet and settled our differences once and for all,” she remarked with the cheekiest of grins.

  Polly then suddenly remembered that there was one more tiny favor she required of him. So she asked him to wait and then, turning on her heels, she rushed over to where her schoolbag still lay propped up against the oak tree. She pulled out her letter and raced back to his side.

  “Please, could you pop this letter into an envelope and then post it for me?” she said breathlessly as she proceeded to stuff the letter into his hand. “The address of where it needs to be sent is written at the top of the letter, so promise me that you will do this for me, Napoli, for I am very worried for my younger brother,” she pleaded with him.

  Napoli agreed to her request and gave his word that like all good Frenchmen he would not forget to honor his promise to her.

  “All you have to do is pop it into one of many bright red boxes that you will see littered all around the countryside; you can’t miss them, Napoli,” said Polly squeezing his hand to show the full extent of her appreciation.

  Napoli placed the letter in his breast pocket and blew Polly a kiss before shouting, “Vivre La France!” as he waved his bayonet high into the air and galloped off at great speed into the sunset.

  Polly watched until he was little more than a dot on the horizon, then casually sauntered over to where Dodo lay resting under the old oak tree. She decided not to disturb him, for he looked so peaceful lying there with his eyes closed.

  Polly placed her schoolbag beside him and lay down and closed her eyes, smiling to herself as she fondly remembered Napoli, the strange Frenchman who helped save her. She hoped his meeting with the Duke of Welligog would turn into a happy event for both parties concerned.

  Chapter 29

  TOBIAS HITS THE JACKPOT

  SOON IT GREW dark as well as very cold, and Polly decided that they should gather up their belongings and set off again to find the crossroads before it became too dark to see which road to take.

  “Come on, Dodo, it’s time to go,” she whispered, giving him a gentle shake. Dodo didn’t respond. “Dodo, wake up; come on. Stop pretending to be asleep, for we urgently need to be on our way,” she pleaded.

  Still Dodo did not reply. Polly then shook him really hard before she suddenly realized that her young friend had slipped back into unconsciousness. Polly felt quite beside herself with fear as she wondered what on earth she should or should not do. After all, they were out in the middle of the countryside with not a house or cottage in sight, and it was now beginning to get cold as well as dark. Pure panic clutched at her heart as the full extent of her new and awful crisis fully dawned on her.

  Poor Polly felt she had little or no choice but to try and carry Dodo on her shoulders until they could find help. It was no easy matter trying to carry Dodo’s heavy, limp body in piggyback fashion. This was made worse by the fact that she also had Langdon and her schoolbag to carry. She knew for certain that the route to find help was going to be a long and painful one, as now she could only go at a snail’s pace because she was so weighed down.

  If the truth be known, she did think of abandoning him, if only for a season, while she went in search of help. After al
l, no one would expect a rather frail girl like Polly to physically carry the weight of a boy any real distance, would they? And she reminded herself that she had already fought dragons in the castle and saved him from being eaten alive by the vilest, gruesome rats! So she had done more than her duty required, hadn’t she?

  “Yes, I don’t believe anyone could point the finger at me, if, at this very difficult time, I decided to abandon him to save my own life,” mumbled a very faint-hearted Polly to herself as the load of her burden in carrying Dodo had tripled, if not quadrupled.

  It took Polly many harrowing hours of trudging and battling through bushes and thorny briars before she made it to the top of the hill, and finally she could head down into the valley. The downhill trip was made much easier because, since no one was around to make disapproving noises, Polly lay Dodo on the ground and then gave him a quick push before standing up straight to watch and hope that he did not go off course as he rolled over and over like a beer barrel until he reached the bottom of the valley.

  As she watched his bumpy descent, she did whisper, “Forgive me,” closing her eyes as she considered the terrible implications of what she had just done. For as far as she knew the poor, sick boy could now be dead! However, Polly reasoned that she had been given no choice in the matter, and doing it this way had at the very least given her the breathing space to temporarily recover from her ordeal. She was, after all, aching all over and covered in gashes from all the heath and bracken she had struggled to get through as she blindly stumbled along. Her feet soon started to swell and bleed, but still she forced herself to keep on moving.

  As darkness fell, the temperature dramatically nosedived to well below zero. And as if that was not enough for her to contend with, the wind too became her latest enemy as it blew up into a gale, howling ferociously as it wickedly mocked her. Soon it became so cold that her ears and nose were burning and her hands and feet felt like frozen ice blocks. Many times she had to resort to literally dragging Dodo along by his feet, otherwise roughly pulling him along from underneath his armpits.