Just to Hear 'I Love You': An Alternate Tale of Jane Austen's 'Pride & Prejudice'

by Sarah Johnson

Darcy listened to them, curious about what Miss Bennet would say when she found out just how wealthy he was, especially after their conversation on the steps of her uncle’s home the previous week.

  “Is it not the most marvelous house you have ever seen? So grand and exceptional in its stature; it truly is a beauty to behold both inside and out.” The countess added with obvious jealousy in her voice, “The works of art in the gallery and the sculptures around the grounds can be equaled only by a handful of estates in all of England.”

  “Oh my, yes, it is gorgeous, but the house is not what drew my eye immediately. The land surrounding it is well maintained and the gardens are lovely, but to see such a place where nature seems to be brightened by its presence, and yet it is not overwhelming to the beauty of the wood and hills all around. Why, even the sheep grazing off in the distant field do not seem out of place. That is what is so breathtaking.”

  Darcy felt the corners of his lips raise a little with her description. He stepped up to the two ladies, looking at the picture with them. “I feel the same way, Miss Bennet, though few are drawn to what I love most about Pemberley. They usually see only the grandeur of the estate and gardens, not the surrounding countryside and hills, the wood and rivers.”

  “Oh, but they miss so much, sir. The land itself seems to direct your eye to the manor as if born from the nature surrounding it, giving it a picturesque quality,” she replied quietly.

  The countess saw her nephew’s small smile and knew this could not be good. She cleared her throat. “Well, as the others have already left the hall, we must hasten to join them.”

  Darcy put his arm out to Elizabeth and she accepted it without hesitation. As if it was a second thought, he extended his other arm to his aunt, escorting them to the dining room where everyone was waiting.

  When they were all seated, Darcy noticed a distressed look on Mary’s face. Looking to her sister seated across from her, he watched Miss Bennet move her lips without making a sound. Mary closed her eyes for a second and took a deep breath, her features showing a much calmer demeanor when she opened them again. He was intrigued at this exchange and looked to his own sister, noticing her haughty demeanor mirroring that of his aunt and uncle. He sighed silently, wondering if he too carried that same look at times. He would have to ask Fitz later.

  As the meal progressed, Darcy noticed his sister’s countenance growing more jaded and he wondered at his acquiescence to her plea to offer her apologies to Miss Bennet when the ladies separated after the meal. Maybe everything will be well, he told himself, though he could not shake the uneasy feeling of something going terribly wrong this evening.

  When the time came, Lady Danver rose and the ladies departed the dining room, leaving the gentlemen to their brandy and cigars. Edward pulled a package from his jacket pocket, holding it out to his host, “I thought we might enjoy these this evening.”

  Darcy unwrapped the brown paper, impressed with the cigars encased within. He lifted one to his nose to better investigate. “That is an interesting and pleasant combination of spices, Mr Gardiner. I thank you for the offer and would be pleased to smoke these this evening.” He held out the offering to his guests and all three took a cigar and followed Darcy to the library. The men were soon ensconced in the comfortable chairs, each with a glass of brandy and a lit cigar, puffs of the sweet smelling smoke rising into the air.

  “Hmmm, I would have to say these are among the best cigars I have ever had the privilege of smoking, Mr Gardiner,” Fitz replied.

  “Thank you, colonel. They were wrapped especially for this evening,” Gardiner said with a smile.

  “From your own stock I presume?” the earl asked.

  He turned to the older gentleman, “Yes, my lord. I have several businesses, but one of my newest ventures is a cigar shop. This particular blend of spices was suggested to me by my business partner, Mr Stone, who recently returned from India with some new spices and recipes.”

  The earl nodded, complimenting the blend again as he puffed on the cigar. If my nephew must invite people from trade into his home, he thought, at least it is someone with connections to a good cigar. I wonder if he can acquire French brandy. The earl’s thoughts were interrupted by the laughter of the other gentlemen. Obviously he had missed something, so he shifted in his chair, took another puff of the sweet cigar, and began to listen to the younger gentlemen as they talked of London’s current events.

  When a half hour had passed, they returned to the drawing room where the ladies awaited them. All were dismayed at the spectacle before them as they entered. The countess and Miss Darcy were standing toe to toe against Miss Bennet and Mrs Gardiner, with Miss Mary cowering behind her two defensive relations.

  “Explain this,” Darcy demanded.

  The countess turned to her nephew, vehemently crying out, “I cannot think you knew of this... this... falsehood which has been perpetrated upon your household this evening. These people have brought a person who belongs in an asylum into your home, and I have found out my niece was also exposed to her presence while in Ramsgate!”

  “What? Whatever do you mean?” the earl asked his wife as he stepped to her side.

  She pointed her finger angrily at Mary, “She belongs in an asylum I tell you!”

  “THAT IS ENOUGH!” Darcy’s voice was heard over the cries of his aunt. He walked to Mary, slowly and quietly asking her, “Are you well Miss Mary?” She nodded her head and looked down at the floor as Darcy turned back to his guests. “Where she belongs is in the bosom of a loving family, not an asylum, and as far as I have been able to see in every interaction I have had with the Gardiners and the Misses Bennet, that is exactly where she is.”

  “I will not have my niece exposed to such people,” the countess angrily replied.

  The earl saw the look in Darcy’s eye and wisely urged his wife, “Perhaps it is time we leave.”

  “Yes, perhaps it is,” Darcy bowed shortly, trying to keep his rising temper in check.

  “Come by Berkeley Square on the morrow, Darcy,” the earl said, receiving a curt nod from his nephew before he pushed past his son in the doorway, refusing to even look at him, and escorted his wife from the house.

  As soon as the front door closed Darcy turned to his sister, firmly stating, “It is time you retire.” He watched her walk up the stairs with her head down before turning to his guests, “Mrs Gardiner, I do humbly apologize for whatever my relations have said this evening against your niece.” He turned to look at the other guests as well, “I sincerely wish to further our acquaintance, whether my family chooses to accept my decision or not.”

  “Sir,” Gardiner replied, “perhaps it would be best if you have some time to think about the implications of such actions.”

  “No, I know my own heart in this matter,” he said fervently. “I am my own man and not bound to the strictures they wish to place on me.”

  “Are you certain?”

  “Yes sir, I am. I wish to continue our acquaintance and hope to have you and your family here again soon.” He turned back to Mrs Gardiner and Miss Bennet, “Would you please tell me what led to the display we walked in on this evening?”

  Elizabeth took a breath and squared her shoulders, “Miss Darcy felt it necessary to inform your aunt of my sister’s apparent madness, saying she once saw Mary waving her arms around in a wild fashion with a crazed look in her eye, and that she feared for her life when around my sister.”

  “I take it what she truly saw was Miss Mary using her hands to speak with you?”

  “Yes, my sister rarely signs in front of others, but in Ramsgate she did so a few times in front of Miss Darcy,” Elizabeth explained.

  Fitz stepped into the conversation, “I think it is time we have a serious talk with our charge. Thank you Miss Bennet.” He then looked at Mary, walking over to garner her attention. When she finally looked at him, he said, “I am sorry my cousin was so mean spirited towards you this evening. Please know she does not speak for everyone in our f
amily. My father and mother do not have as much control as they wish over our family. I apologize on their behalf, even if they would refuse to do so themselves.”

  Mary gave a nod, a small smile at the corners of her lips until she once again looked to the ground.

  “I think it is time we take our leave as well, Mr Darcy,” Gardiner replied. “Come girls,” he held out his arm to Mary and his wife, Elizabeth following after them to the hall.

  Darcy placed the cape around Miss Bennet’s shoulders and watched as she followed her family out the door, happy to see her turn back to look at him when her uncle helped her into the carriage. He stepped back inside and closed the door, his mind racing with all that had happened this evening.

  “I think I will retire,” Fitz said. “We both need to speak with Georgiana tomorrow morning, and if tonight is any indication of what my father will have to say tomorrow, you will need your rest as well.”

  “Thank you Fitz. You are the closest thing I have to a brother, and I am grateful to have your support in this matter.”

  “Well, you were always nicer to me than Milton ever was,” he joked, then nodded and went up the stairs to the room he had called his own ever since he came to live with his aunt and uncle at only thirteen years of age.

  Darcy stood in the hall staring at the painting of Pemberley, his mind remembering the words Miss Bennet said about the picturesque qualities of the landscape. A smile tugged at his lip as he thought of all she said.

  Darcy walked into the dining room, the dark circles under his eyes telling of his lack of sleep. He nodded a greeting to his cousin, retrieved a cup of tea and a plate from the sideboard, then sat down in his usual seat, dismissing the servants from the room before he asked, “What are we to do with her?”

  Fitz sighed, “I do not know, Darcy. I was up half the night myself trying to find a solution. Her attitude is being perpetuated by my parents, so I think she must be separated from them. Beyond that, I really do not know.”

  “First, she will apologize to Miss Mary and the rest of her family, for her behavior last evening,” Darcy replied. “Only this time I will be in the room for the entirety of it.”

  “I may go with you just to help keep an eye on her,” he offered.

  “Your presence would be greatly appreciated.”

  “When do you want to leave?”

  “If you are free this morning, I think it would be best to go as soon as an appropriate hour arrives.”

  Fitz stood up from the table, “I happen to be free until later, so I will go immediately and make sure Georgiana is dressed in time.” He looked at his watch and snickered, “I think three hours should give her plenty of time to dress for the occasion, do not you?”

  “You know she is not an early riser,” he chuckled.

  “Yes, well, as my new soldiers learn very quickly, I can be quite the motivator to get them out of bed.” He smiled, “Who knows, this may be just what she needs to see how wrong she has been lately.”

  “Well,” Darcy said as he stood, “it cannot hurt to try.”

  Elizabeth and Mary had just returned from their walk in the park, Mary going upstairs to lie down for a few minutes to hopefully rid herself of a sudden headache, when the three visitors were announced to the two remaining ladies in the sitting room. Mrs Gardiner greeted their guests affably, “Mr Darcy, Miss Darcy, Colonel Fitzwilliam, it is good of you to call today. Unfortunately, my husband is not home at this time.”

  “We do not wish to disturb your household madam, but I brought my sister to speak with Miss Mary.”

  Elizabeth spoke up, “She is resting right now. Can I be of service instead, sir?

  “Oh,” the colonel said, “is she not feeling well?”

  “It is only a slight headache.”

  “I am glad to hear it.”

  “I would like to speak with Miss Darcy, if that is acceptable you?” Elizabeth said, looking pointedly at Mr Darcy.

  “Yes, of course.”

  Georgiana looked up at Darcy, hoping he would not force her, but his firmly set jaw told her he would not change his mind. She slowly followed Miss Bennet outside into the garden to a bench amongst the flowers.

  “Please have a seat, Miss Darcy,” Elizabeth said as she, too, sat. “I do not know what happened to the sweet girl my sister and I met when we first arrived in Ramsgate, but your recent actions have made me think you were not forthcoming with your true opinions in the beginning of our friendship.”

  “If anyone has not been forthcoming, it has been you, Miss Bennet,” she said with disgust clear in her quiet voice.

  “Why do you say that? When have I ever been dishonest with you?”

  “You never told me you are from trade,” she looked icily at Elizabeth.

  “You are correct; I did not, because my sister and I are gently born. My uncle however is a very astute and fortunate man of business, but I do not see how that would be of any importance to us meeting daily to collect seashells.”

  Georgiana looked affronted by Elizabeth’s answer, but did not say anything in response.

  “Everything you did in Ramsgate aside, what you said of my sister last evening was wrong. It is incomprehensible to me why you would say such things, but if it is from lack of information I will assure you of the facts today. My sister Mary was a normal child, born without any impairment in speech or hearing. However, when she was eight years old, we were skating and a thin part of the ice gave way. My older sister ran for help while my friend and I pulled Mary from the freezing water. She lost her hearing completely because of the fever that resulted from the accident. When you saw her moving her hands around in Ramsgate she was not mad and her mind was not addled, she was signing. It is her way of communicating.”

  “Oh,” Georgiana said quietly, looking down at her hands. “So she cannot speak?”

  “She can speak, but what comes out is oft times not very clear because she cannot hear her own voice, so she prefers to use signs when talking to others, especially those outside of our family,” Elizabeth explained.

  “I am sorry—I truly thought she was mad,” Georgiana said flatly.

  Something about the girl’s demeanor made Elizabeth believe she was just acting concerned for the sake of her audience. “Miss Darcy, if you believed so, I wonder why you waited this long in our acquaintance to voice your concerns.”

  Georgiana glared at the lady seated beside her. “I am only here because my brother insisted I apologize.”

  “Well it will not be possible today as my sister is above stairs resting. I will let her know you came.” Elizabeth stood, watching the girl as she walked back inside, her head bowed in what appeared to be a humbled posture, but Elizabeth was not fooled. She was about to follow when Mr Darcy stepped outside to talk with her.

  “Thank you for speaking with my sister, Miss Bennet. She seems a little more repentant than before,” he replied, looking back through the open door at Georgiana as she stood beside Fitz.

  Elizabeth sighed, “Unfortunately, I do not think so, Mr Darcy. I think she knows how to look the part very well, but I doubt her heart is touched.”

  Darcy looked back to her, “My cousin and I have been trying to decide what to do with her, but neither of us have the answer. We pulled her from school a few months ago, and it is obvious by her subsequent behavior that what happened in Ramsgate was a continuation of the same problems.” He paused, looking at her for a minute before he tentatively asked, “What would you do, Miss Bennet?”

  She chuckled, “Besides turn her over my knee? I would probably look into hiring another companion; one well investigated and older, whom Miss Darcy cannot manipulate to do her bidding.”

  “Yes, that may be our only option. Thank you; I will speak with my cousin about your suggestion.”

  “My uncle may be able to help you find someone,” she offered.

  “I will speak with him as well then.” He bowed, thanking her once again and saying he would have his sister draft a letter of apolog
y to Miss Mary so as not to upset her any further, then the visitors took their leave.

  Elizabeth sat outside in the garden thinking of how she could help the situation, but until Miss Darcy was ready to change, there was really nothing more she could do other than protect Mary from the girl’s vitriol.

  Saturday, May 4, 1811

  Fitz looked across at Darcy, “Your turn.”

  He took a shot and missed, the cue ball bouncing in a random pattern across the table.

  “Thanks for the set—up.” Fitz lined up his shot and ended the game. “What has you distracted?”

  “Nothing... I am not distracted.”

  “Oh, right! This is the first time in five years I have won a game of billiards against you when you broke, and you say you are not distracted? I do not believe you.” Fitz went to the sideboard and poured them drinks, handing one to his cousin as they both sat down beside the fire. “Come on, you know you will end up telling me anyway.”

  Darcy stared into the small flames, his glass untouched on the table as he twisted his ring back and forth. “Do you think I am haughty like your parents and my sister?”

  “No,” Fitz said quickly.

  “I just wonder... if Georgiana had not run away and if Miss Bennet and Miss Mary had not helped us find her, would I have invited the Gardiner’s to dine at my house?”

  “Well of course not—you would not have met them,” he joked.

  “You know what I mean Fitz.”

  He chuckled, “Just teasing Darce. In my honest opinion, yes you would. After all, your friend Bingley’s money comes from trade, and that has never stopped you from inviting him to dinner or being seen with him around Town.”

  Darcy sat thinking silently for a few minutes before he finally asked, “Would my father?”

  “No, I do not think he would. Uncle George was, in many ways, just like my father. They were raised with the beliefs the generation before them thought were most important—that of perpetuating the culture of our great England and keeping the classes divided,” Fitz said. “Our parents’ generation does not see the changes on the horizon. New manufacturing methods and smarter inventions are ushering in a new time, and it is people like you who will change the future. You have enough stature and wealth to not be held back, and I know you support these new ideals.” He looked intently at his cousin for a minute before he continued. “One day you will give in to Aunt Catherine and marry Anne, or perhaps you will stand up to her and marry some other lady, and then it will be up to you to teach your children what is important to our future.”