The Balkanization of America

by Ira Tabankin

  “Excellent news. I knew the drug lords wouldn’t turn down a chance to convert their money. They thought we wouldn’t lie to them. President Obsma might have honored his word; these people are all criminals, taking them down protects US citizens.”

  “Sir, we’ve put a huge dent into the drug trade, I think this is a good time for you to announce your new drug policy.”

  “How many drug lords remain?”

  “Sir, we think there are three major chiefs left.”

  “Do we know where they’re located?”

  “Yes, we have a good lock on them.”

  “Tell the Admiral to attack them, take all three of them down today.”

  The media talking heads announce the President’s new drug program; they’ve just been handed the short overview, reading it, and all are surprised, shocked is a better word to describe their feelings. They break into their normal broadcast programs, “Ladies and gentlemen, today the Brownstone administration has announced a new drug policy. First the Brownstone administration has announced they have captured or killed most of the existing drug lords. The administration has issued a statement saying they classify the war on drugs as unwinnable. Billions of dollars have been spent and wasted in a losing war. The administration announced a few minutes ago they are legalizing most drugs. These drugs will be sold through pharmacies. Major drug companies are going to take over the production of the drugs to ensure they aren’t cut with any poison. The drugs will be available with a doctor’s prescription; insurance coverage won’t pay for the drugs, and the government is taxing them. Steve Forbas said today he expects the federal Treasury will collect billions in new taxes while also saving billions. Having them sold through pharmacies will ensure they are clean and safe. The administration says they expect street crime will decrease. President Brownstone asks the states to follow the Federal Government and also pass DUI laws that cover driving under the influence of drugs. The President said if liquor can be purchased and taxed, why not drugs? He said no matter what the government does; there will always be a demand for drugs why shouldn’t the country profit from the sale of them while at the same time ensuring the users are protected from mistakenly taking poison. As a side note, the change of the country’s drug laws only applies to those over the age of 21, all drugs are still illegal for those under 21.

  The media is shocked at this change; the administration caught the media and the country by surprise.

  The “talking heads” don’t know how to respond, most are at a loss of words being asked how to respond. Most try to find something negative to say, however, the positives outweigh the negatives. The networks don’t know what to do, they also don’t know if they should accept advertising for legal drugs. The major networks chair people call each other to discuss the question of accepting advertising; none wants to be the first if the others don’t accept the ads.

  Complete surprise takes many in the country on both political sides, most don’t know how to respond, over time both sides agree that the President’s decision is a good one for the country.

  @@@@@

  In the Presidential conference room President Brownstone, four-star Admiral Zander Chairman of the Joint Staffs, Rash Linebacker, Press Secretary, Randy Paul the Secretary of State and John Sessions the Secretary of Defense discusses options. John is addressing the group, “Russia now has firm control of Poland and is massing on Germany’s border. China has absorbed Vietnam and Thailand. They have moved three million people into Korea providing what they call humanitarian aid. I’d guess by the end of the month they will have total control of both Koreas. Japan and China are in discussions to work together; our best guess is Japan will become a sort of vassal to China.

  President Brownstone looks around the table; he’s studying the map, which displays the locations of the American and Russian and Chinese forces. He says, “We’re in a hard spot we have no forces in a good position to slow down their next steps.”

  Randy says, “The Premier of Germany is screaming we have to support her.”

  The President responds, “Just how are we going to do that without starting a full-scale third world war? A year ago she demanded we remove our troops and now she wants them back? If we do nothing, Russia will end up taking over Europe, in order to remove them we’ll be in a third world war which will cost us trillions of dollars and most likely hundreds of thousands of wounded or killed. We’ve saved Europe twice before. After each world war, we were asked to bring our troops home. I’m not sure we can get there quick enough with enough equipment to make a difference. I refuse to use our people as a speed bump. Comments?”

  Chapter 23

  The Secretary-General of the United Nations takes the podium to open the new Security Council session, “Ladies and Gentlemen, I hereby call this session of the Security Council meeting to order. We have received a request from a very well know national leader and friend of the world to address the council this morning. Given this person’s background, given how hard he’s worked for world peace his entire life I could not refuse his request. Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s my pleasure to turn the podium over to someone who really doesn’t need any introduction, President Obsma.”

  President Obsma is greeted by polite applause; most of the Security Council members sit in stunned silence not believing the impeached US President would be standing in front of the world’s body. Many wanted to leave, on the other hand, all are curious what he has to say.

  “Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for allowing me to address you this morning. I’ve come before you to make an important announcement and to request your support. I put in six very stressful years trying to lead the United States to become a true member of a peaceful world community. In my six years as the legally elected United States President, I learned that the United States has outlived the country’s founder’s goals. Today’s world is much different from the future the founders of America envisioned. America grew very rapidity; I can honestly say the United States grew by walking on the backs of the poor workers who were exploited by the racist rich business owners and bankers who held the real reins of power behind the scenes. Before I was elected as the 44th President, the real ruling class in America were the Jewish bankers who almost destroyed the world’s economy in 2007~8. These bankers didn’t just ruin America’s economy; they brought the world to its knees. The upper-class business owners who compose the world’s 1% are also responsible for the pain felt around the world. We have reached the point in the history of the world when a small number of people can and more importantly do control the world’s economy. While this great organization works every day to ensure World Wars are a thing of history, and this body works to improve the lives of each and every one of the six billion people living on the world. No matter what this great council agrees to, if the ruling 1% don’t agree with what this wise body agrees, they’ll ignore the United Nations, in reality the world’s single voice. I stand here today to officially announce the formation of a new nation, a nation that is based on the core principals that founded this great body. In man’s history, many nations have come and gone. Very few of the nations represented here have the same borders as they did when they were founded. Many countries have grown; many realized that groups of their citizens didn’t relate to the views of the other citizens. There comes a time when people of a like mind and heart decide to come together and form a nation. History is full of hundreds of examples where these new nations grow and overtake the economic strength of their original national parents. I worked harder than any previous American President. I launched more progress to reduce income inequality than any other Presiden. I provided every person in America with health care, and improved America’s education system with a common core that ensured every student learned the same regardless of where they lived in America or what their family’s income was. The children of the poorest and the children of the top 1% learned the same lessons at the same time. I made more progress to equalize the way every religion was treated; I
made sure all religions were treated the same, all religions had their holidays and customs honored. I alone defended the planet Earth by outlawing fracking that we all know damages the world’s fresh water supply. I alone did more than anyone else did to improve our citizen’s health by outlawing trans-fats, by outlawing the use of salt; my wife improved the school meal program for every school age child in America.

  We outlawed fast food and high sugar snacks in our schools. We tirelessly worked to improve peace in the world. I alone cut the world’s largest military by over 50%. I started the total nuclear disarmament of the world’s largest inventory of these horrible weapons. As the only country to have used these horrible weapons, it had to be America to be the first to say NO to these weapons. I was the first American President, who understood how horrible these weapons are. I alone disarmed the American citizens who owned 300 million weapons, 300 million dangerous firearms have been removed from the world. I tore down the fences that blocked the people’s free access across the imaginary lines drawn on a map that determined borders. I always stood for people having the right to decide where they want to live and raise their children. I always stood for making the world a safer place to raise children. The children of today are the teachers and presidents of tomorrow. Today’s children will one day be sitting in our seats within this hallowed halls working to ensure a peaceful world.

  I’m here today asking for the United Nations to recognize the new nation of the Liberal States of America. We want to become a full member of the United Nations. We want to take our rightful place on the world’s stage. The people of the LSA deserve to have their voices and desires heard by the other member nations of the world.

  Thank you for your time this morning. The people of the LSA are waiting to join you working for world peace.”

  President for life Obsma of the LSA receives a standing ovation from the members of the Security Council. He turns and shakes the Secretary General’s hand; they hug on the stage, bringing forth an additional round of applause.

  President Brownstone and Rash Linebacker sat in the Oval Office watching the speech live. Rash turns smiling, addressing the President, “Did I really hear him say what he did?”

  President Brownstone smiling turns to Rash laughing, “There goes the only man in 2000 years who knows how to walk on water. He steps on the tears and sweat of those lives he’s destroyed. In his mind, he’s the new Messiah.”

  President Brownstone laughs before replying, “Rash, I expect the UN to vote for the LSA full member status, I was thinking of using our veto vote to stop them, and decided against using it. I think he should be a member; he should pay his fair share of their dues. He’ll have to because I’m issuing orders that we’re going to reduce the amount we spend at the UN by 90%, let the American hating countries find someone else to line their pockets. We can’t afford it. Where was the UN when the world turned against the US dollar?”

  Rash looks thoughtful, he pauses, “General, since we’ve adopted the gold standard, our currency is in demand across the world again, and in fact, the value of the US dollar has risen higher than it was under President Obsma. Frankly I think most of our people would be happy if we withdrew from the UN.”

  “Since the UN is located in New York City, which is now a part of the LSA, we’ll sit back and watch how Obsma handles their request for money and special favors. By the way, Rash please issue a press release that any UN diplomat who wishes to leave New York City and visit or travel into USA territory will be required to register with the FBI and purchase a visa. Anyone caught in the USA without a valid visa will be kicked out and barred from entering our country again, that includes the LSA Representatives.”

  “Sir, how much will the visas cost?”

  “Let Steve figure that out, tell him to use his best judgment.”

  Laughing so hard, he’s spilling his coffee, Rash says, “Knowing Steve we’ll pay off our national debt in six months based on the fee structure he’ll put in place.”

  “Sounds like a plan to me. By the way, I’m sorry I haven’t had a chance to see the recording of your first press briefing, how did it go?”

  Rash breaks out laughing again, trying to speak and belly laugh at the same time. “Sir, you should have seen their faces when I walked to the podium, and then, when Glen, Mike, and Sean took seats in the front row, I thought a few of the White House reporters were going to have a heart attack. One gasped out loud enough that most people in the room turned to look at him. When I gave Shawn the first question, the room erupted. I’ve been nicknamed the ‘minister of propaganda’ I guess I should hold today’s briefing wearing a brown uniform shirt with a cigar in my mouth.”

  “Oh, please don’t do that, I’m not sure I could hold back laughing. Is the press giving you a harder time than normal?”

  “You forget whom you’re talking to, I gave them back worse than they gave me. I’m not a Press Secretary they can push around. I also told them any bullshit reporting or making up things I said will get them expelled from the White House press pool.”

  “I see you’ll be making life long friends with our friends in the media.”

  “Sir this is something we need to change, we need to go on the offensive with the press; we need to go directly to the American people. I’m suggesting I hold a nightly news update for the American people, say every evening for 30 minutes that will give us a chance to talk directly to the people.”

  “Rash, I like it, go get em!”

  @@@@@

  President for life of the LSA, Obsma announces that Christmas day 2015 will be the official birth and legal formation of the LSA. The LSA now comprises the area of, California above San Diego and to the west of the Central Valley, all of Oregon and Washington, Minnesota, the northern half of Illinois, Hawaii, Wisconsin, Michigan, New Jersey, New York City, Connecticut, Delaware, Rhode Island, Massachusetts. Many were surprised when Maine, New Hampshire, and Vermont voted to remain in the United States. Ohio, Indiana, and Pennsylvania are split; the urban areas voted to join the LSA while the rural areas voted to remain in the United States. These two states will become battle lines in the civil war between those supporting the LSA and those supporting the USA. The ceremony is planned for noon EST on Christmas day where Presidents Obsma and Brownstone will jointly sign the documents of separation formalizing the breakup of the United States of America into two countries. Las Vegas bookies place the odds at 20 to one against the LSA surviving more than five years before it implodes. After the documents are countersigned, the two national flags are flown next to each other to officially recognize the split. President Obsma asks to speak to President Brownstone in private.

  When the two men are seated in a secure conference room, President Obsma addresses President Brownstone, “Mr. President, I’d like to thank you for not using the military to block our separation. I think the split is for the best for all of our people. I would like to inquire about the vast amounts of materials your military and construction people took out of the LSA states.”

  “President Obsma, the people of the United States, paid for that equipment since the LSA is no longer part of the USA, it makes no sense to leave such expensive equipment behind. That is unless you’d like to purchase some of the equipment.”

  “You’d be willing to sell us the equipment?”

  “Of course, however, remember all deals are paid in precious metals, no credit, no cash. We accept gold, silver, platinum, and of course diamonds.”

  “Surely we can come to some sort of deal, the LSA is a new nation we don’t have those kinds of assets yet.”

  “Nor do I ever think you will ever have them.”

  “There is the issue of destroying the bridges and your building of walls between our two countries, sir, really; we don’t need walls and fences between us. We’re a common people.”

  “Mr. President, we are no longer a common people; you saw to that, you are very proud of your open border policy, I’m very proud of my closed border policy. We b
lew the bridges because they were ours, not yours. Mr. President may I remind you, you once said, “You didn’t build that.” Well, we as a nation did build those bridges, since the LSA refused to share the financial support of them, there was no reason you should get a free ride on what you did not build.”

  “Honestly, this entire visa and permit thing for people to cross the border, isn’t that a bit much?”

  “No, I was thinking of a total ban, but that would harm many of the people on both sides of the border who have family members on the other side.”

  “I really think you need to rescind your rules, even I as the President for life of the LSA needs to have a visa to cross into the USA.”

  “I put the rules in place just for you.”

  “Since you’ve taken all of our military assets leaving us without any sort of protection, may we sign a mutual defense agreement?”

  “Not very mutual since you don’t have a military. To tell you the truth Mr., President, the United States of America isn’t interested in signing treaties with the LSA. We’re not going to shed a drop of blood for you, we’re not going to spend a penny on you. You wanted to form your perfect nation; you have your chance. I wish you luck and good bye. My Secret Service agent will escort you to your airplane; I’ve tasked the US Air Force to escort you back to Los Angles, which I understand is your new Capital.”