Snow Covered Moon

by L M Adams

  Jack’s speech goes almost archaic when he’s upset; good to know.

  “I should apologize as well. We are all adjusting to a lot of changes; you should know I’ve never been good at the emotional stuff… or very supportive.”

  Add supernatural powers to a melting pot of relationship garbage, say hello to nuclear war.

  He leans down and kisses my forehead and moves so his mouth is close to my ear, whispering low, “I know, Jae. I understand and I accept that about you as well. Is it completely fucked up that when you threaten to make me watch you fuck another I hope you chain me in silver while you do it? I pray you will leave me begging and crying in need of you. And still in my heart that would not be nearly enough to make up for the asshole I’ve been. Today I do not feel like a good man.”

  He straightens to his full height. “And now I will apologize to the beast, for my actions today were without honor.” He turns fluidly and makes his way to Lucien.

  What the fuck is happening to my life!? I swear I want to scream it. Instead I watch as Jack hands Lucien a beer; you wouldn’t think they tried to kill each other last night, or this morning. They aren’t behaving like friends, but neither are they behaving like enemies. I guess it’s a start.

  I crack my own beer open. Ice cold, goddess that tastes good, like manna from heaven. My stomach growls soon after my first sip of the cold brew. I sit in the sun and sip on my beer thinking… yup no, fuck thinking; it’s not really my thing. Self-reflection? Shove it up your ass, please and thank you.

  I let Lucien and Jack have another moment or two and get up from the table. I walk over to them both. Standing together and yet apart from one another. Lucien actually looks contrite. Perhaps he is learning from Jack, I just hope Jack doesn’t pick up any of Lucien’s bad habits.

  “If everyone is done with all the emotional bullshit for the day, can we get to business?” I turn and walk back to the table and sit down. Denial, yup I can do denial very well. Tabari joins us after the men of my fucked up little triad sit down.

  “Did you talk to Big Mike about the missing wolf carriers?” Tabari asks.

  “No, my conversation got interrupted,” I say cutting my eyes in Lucien’s direction.

  “We need to speak to him about it before we go. And we need to inform him of your elevated position in the Kindred. We’ll need to do the same with Madame Valentine.”

  Oh god, Madame Valentine. I hang my head in my hands.

  “She claimed first blood last night. Peter got shot and … and I couldn’t hold my temper in check. I offered her two days of service a month to keep her from reporting me to the Kindred.”

  “Making ties with werewolves and vampires all in one night? Really, Jae, how can one person get tangled up in so much within a twenty-four-hour period? Now you are supposed to be the Authority of the Kindred, but you’re serving Madame Valentine and running like a wolf with Big Mike.” Tabari pinches the bridge of his nose like he’s praying for divine intervention or patience. He looks to Lucien, but he’s silent for once.

  “I didn’t mean for this to happen!” Losing my own patience, every time I calm myself everyone keeps driving me back to the edge. My emotions are everywhere right now.

  “It’s not a necessarily bad thing. It’s good for you to have ties with the supernaturals you govern; usually it’s done with money, favors, and debts. But this works even if it’s just a little unorthodox how you’ve gotten those ties. We can work out something with Madame Valentine, I’m sure. I’ve never met a vampire that doesn’t like to haggle.”

  Tabari stands up and starts pacing. He’s dressed down, for him, not wearing the expected suit and tie. Magi usually wear flowing robes of spun silk. In the human world, they always wear silk suits. All magi except Tabari at least.

  Today Tabari has on pressed jeans, brown hiker boots, and a white button-down shirt. It’s a good look on him, with his shoulder-length blond hair falling freely, framing the green wolf eyes. You’d think he was a full blood elf if it wasn’t for those eyes with specks of green, blue, and yellow in them, and that jaw. He hides the pointed ears with glamour, much like I do with my ebony corkscrew horns.

  “She has a sense of fair play and the old ones do love their plots and schemes. She’ll easily give up something now if she feels she can gain something more valuable in the future. As a Blood Mistress, she treats her vampires well.” Jack speaks up.

  “How can you say that after...?” I trail off, not wanting to speak of exactly how I acquired Jack, nor of what I’d seen of her cruelty in her posh orgy made office area.

  “You have and I have much to bargain with. Valentine has wanted you as her own since you first appeared in Baltimore, and last night you wandered in and kissed me on the neck. She will accept you as a slave, but she will value you more, and give you more, if you go willingly. Vampires still want to be wanted for themselves.” He gets up taking my now empty beer can and his own. I watch as he makes his way to the line for food. I think to tell him to get me something but I already know he will.

  “So, we just need to find a way to balance the playing field between you two. Since you’ll already be hers for two nights a month, we can’t offer that. And offering more time or the same thing makes you seem cheap.”

  Tabari is pacing again back and forth. He levitates three stones and begins spinning them in a circle around his head as he paces. I don’t even think he realizes what he’s doing or that the wolves are starting to look at us with interest.

  “She expects you to be submissive. Don’t.” Lucien finally speaks up. “You have to spend two nights with her a month, yes. But as what? There’s nothing written that says you have to be the submissive. Still it will be tricky. You’ll have to be ruthless. A power shift this big won’t be easy to pull off.”

  “She wiped the floor with me last night.” That won’t work. I don’t have nearly that amount of mojo it would take to bring that bitch to her knees. “She swatted my magic off her like it was a fly and pushed it into one of her vampires.”

  “Why do you rely on your powers? You act like you’re a slave to them when you are the one in control. You are a beautiful, gutsy bitch of a woman. You don’t need succubus powers to bring men and women to their knees,” Lucien says.

  I can’t keep the smile of pleasure off my face. ‘A beautiful, gutsy bitch of a woman.’ Is this how he sees me? Maybe there’s more to him, maybe he really does see me as something more than a broodmare, something to own and possess.

  “It would definitely be a novelty for her,” Jack says, making me jump. I didn’t notice he’d come back.

  He puts a plate with a pit beef sandwich and a handful of chips in front of me.

  I start to ask how he would know what we were discussing then I remember, he’s a vampire. He can hear a frog piss in the wind. And we’re having this conversation in a den of wolves? Everyone has heard the conversation. I won’t be embarrassed. I won’t be embarrassed. Yeah if I say it enough maybe it’ll come true. It worked for Dorothy, damn it I don’t have ruby slippers.

  “Ok we’ll talk about this more, later.” I say, picking at the beef in the open face sandwich. The tangy barbeque brings my taste buds to life and I dive in. I turn to ask Jack to get me another beer but he holds one out with the top already off. The man really is like a personal assistant on crack.

  I wash the beef down with the ice-cold beer and dig in for another bite. Lucien and Tabari get up, going for their own plates, I assume. Do I have what it takes to be the Madame’s mistress? I’ve been trained by the best on how to transfer power. But is it enough? It’ll have to be. I have nothing else to offer her. I can’t be seen as an authority figure and be beholden to her. No one would respect me or my position. Supernaturals respect the strong, the dominant.

  I see Big Mike and Peter walking from the forest just then. Big Mike moves like a predator, for all his muscle and bulk he has a smooth gait. He is sure of himself, a confidence most will never have; the master of his domain. Pete
r walks beside him but still about a half step behind. I don’t think Peter even realizes what he’s doing, deferring to Big Mike, giving him the dominant position.

  Peter sees me, smiles and waves. He seems relaxed. I’m still worried, I am eating for two as Big Mike so delicately put it, I’ll need more power and a lot of it. I wave back and get up from the table making my way over to them both.

  “Feeling good?” I ask. Peter’s eyes are their usual shade of soft brown but I can still see slight flecks of green and yellow in them, the wolf lurking just under the surface.

  He answers with a warm smile, “Yeah, much better, hungry.”

  “The more you eat the less power you will need from, Jaevia, remember what I’ve told you boy.”

  “Go get something to eat.” I shift my eyes to Big Mike.

  “We should talk.”

  Peter nods his head towards Big Mike and walks towards the food. I should see if I can take a sandwich home.

  “Ok girl, listen. I couldn’t hide what you’d done last night when I got the message from the Elders. I love you but I can’t put you above the welfare of my wolves. Your brother promised me he wasn’t taking you away, but he needed to speak with you, it’s the only reason I didn’t warn you.” Big Mike crosses his arms over his chest.

  “I know… I do. It did sting, but you had no choice. I realize that. And I guess it didn’t turn out too bad, they made me a Grigori. I’m just stuck with those two for a time,” I say, nodding towards Lucien and Tabari.

  Lucien looks ill at ease around the children. Tabari is doing magic tricks for the children by conjuring butterflies and sending them to fly. The children are having great fun in trying to catch them. As soon as they do the butterflies explode into sparkles of color; which sends the children into a frenzy.

  “I wonder if he does birthday parties,” Big Mike says in his gruff voice. I scoff but smile at the thought. Tabari is going to be a great dad one day.

  “There have been reports of Bâtardi going missing. Most of them are wolf carriers.” I look to Big Mike to gauge his reaction. There isn’t one. He already knew. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “It was none of your business. What would you have done, girl? You were hiding out from your own kind. I asked around. No one knows anything. I’ve gotten reports of a few adult people going missing, not wolves, humans. I made reports to CNAE and the Kindred. There isn’t much else I can do; they are not wolves.” Big Mike looks down at me with an expression that tells me he wishes he could have done more. But his authority ends with his pack, Bâtardi fall through that loophole, no one is responsible for them.

  I sigh, trying to figure out what I should do next. Maybe talk with the people that know the missing Bâtardi?

  “Could you arrange for me to speak with the families of the people that have gone missing? I’ve gotten a list of ten people going missing, although eight of them were third or fourth generations away from wolf. I have two cougar Bâtardi on the list as well.”

  Big Mike grunts. “Probably why I’m just hearing about those then. We usually stop keeping track of them after their second generation removed. That branch of the family is usually fully immersed into the human world by then and know nothing of us. I’ll do what I can to help you.”

  “What is Peter to you?” I realize the easy acceptance Peter has always had at Big Mike’s has more to do than him being a nice guy to be around.

  “My great nephew. My brother had children outside of his marriage to Rachel, his wolf mate. One of those children was Peter’s dad.” I knew Big Mike was old, just how old is the old dog?

  “What happened to your brother? Can Peter meet his granddad?” I ask in a rush of excitement. That would be so cool.

  “I killed my brother some seventy-five years ago. Pack business. Come, let’s introduce you to the pack as the new Grigori,” Big Mike walks away, leaving me standing there with the ‘oh shit’ look on my face. I slowly follow him over to the group of picnic tables.

  He starts talking to the pack, telling them of my new position. The man is of few words. Before long, there’s a pause and I realize the wolves are standing there, waiting for me to say something.

  “I’ve been welcome here since I arrived in Baltimore. I hope you all feel comfortable in coming to me with any problems or complaints- that of course aren’t covered by the jurisdiction of the Amarok. My intention is not to meddle in the business of the wolves but to be your friend, like I always have been.”

  I stop talking, Tabari stands up and starts read the banns the Elders have given to him. He finishes up and there’s scattered applause.

  Ok awkward, I’ve never been good at public speaking, is anyone really good a public speaking? I don’t think imagining people naked would work for me, I’ll probably just get horny.

  I turn and head towards Jack, still sitting where I’d left him. I sit down beside him. He hands me a napkin. “You have a little sauce, here,” he points to the corner of his mouth. I feel a wash of embarrassment, wishing the earth would open up and swallow me whole.

  I’ve just been introduced as the Grigori, to the wolf pack, with barbeque sauce on my mouth? Classy Jae, oh so classy. My life is shit.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Stinking of guilt

  It’s midday with the sun high in the sky when Big Mike walks over to the table we’d claimed for ourselves. He has his grandson, Jesse, in tow. I’d met Jesse some time ago.

  He has his grandfather’s coloring and height. Not so much of his bulk. He is another man of few words, much like his granddad. Thank god he has better fashion sense. He has on a pair of well-worn jeans and hiking boots, but he pairs it with a plain blue shirt instead of flannel, thank goddess.

  “My boy will take you over to the families of the Bâtardi that have gone missing.” He clasps Jesse on the shoulder in a fatherly show of affection.

  I know Big Mike wants Jesse to become the Amarok of the clan when he passes on. But I just don’t see it. The succession isn’t decided by birth. The strong lead and if Jesse doesn’t have the mojo to hold the pack together, the ability to feed the wolves power, then there will be fighting and death, unless he steps aside peacefully for someone stronger. Something tells me he won’t; he’s the kind of man that has become too accustomed to power.

  “Hi Jesse, good to see you again,” I stand, holding out my hand to him. It’s a good handshake. I smile.

  “Good to see you again, Jae, and congratulations on your appointment,” His eyes wander around looking at the guys.

  “Thanks, I’d like you to meet Tabari, Lucien, Jack, and I think you know Peter.” Each man nods their head as I speak their name. Peter and Jesse shake hands.

  “I expect you and Peter here the night of the full moon at sunset to run. It will be the first time Peter will change,” Big Mike says.

  “Why do I need to come?” I ask, sounding insensitive but not trying to. I’m not a wolf, I don’t belong.

  Big Mike shrugs his shoulder. “The Wolf Mother says so.” He goes to turn on his heel.

  “Amarok,” Tabari stops him, “would you perhaps allow me to run with you under the moon? It’s been a long time since I’ve run with a pack.”

  Big Mike turns and looks at Tabari giving me a short nod. Lucien has to be the only person on earth with worse people skills than Big Mike.

  I look to Jesse. “Can we go now?”

  “Sure, just give me about twenty minutes to wrap up a few things here and you guys can just follow me over. The Williams family doesn’t live too far from here. I don’t know what you’ll find. I looked into it already. I can’t find anything more than a few humans that left, or have been killed; at most it’s a coincidence.” Jesse responds.

  “Perhaps, but it’s the logical place to start.” I smile, Jesse nods his head and turns, heading back to the Big Bad Wolf.

  I take the time to go around and say hi to the wolves I know at the impromptu barbeque; Peter comes with me doing the same. A lot of the wolves hug him
or pound him on the back. I try not to feel left out. I’m not wolf, I never will be. None go running and screaming away from me. Which is something, I guess? Even a few of them congratulate me. I make sure to seek out the Amaroks’ Lupa, his wife, Annette.

  “You sing so beautifully, Annette,” I smile in greeting.

  “Thank you, Jaevia.” She brings me into an embrace and my heart warms. She reminds me of my mom, Annette does. All grace and beauty, she’s like a river of unending patience and understanding. I think many of the wolves here accepted me because she has accepted me. I’m grateful for her friendship.

  I pull from the hug and look at her. You’d think she was twenty-something if not for the small crinkles around her eyes and smile lines around her mouth. She’s slender but doesn’t seem frail. She has honey blonde hair and warm green eyes. You can tell she was a beauty in her prime and still is. Where Big Mike is all gruff and rough edges, Annette is smooth and easy smiles.

  “It seems you have a harem of men with you now.” She laughs.

  “Yeah, I can’t seem to get rid of them,” I answer.

  “Maybe because you’re not supposed to, Jaevia. The blood drinker dotes on you. The Reaper hunts you with his eyes. The Magic man gives you happiness and our baby wolf gives you hope.” She says, all cryptic like. I look at her with a confused look on my face. I’m about to ask her what she means when Big Mike walks over putting an arm around her and yanking her to his side.

  “Annette has been thinking about playing matchmaker, then you show up with three new men in tow. Fast moving, if I say so myself.”

  I roll my eyes at Big Mike. “Really, why is everyone so concerned about my love life?!”

  “Jaevia, you’re a succubus who wasn’t having sex. It was making everyone miserable.”

  “Michael, stop it.” Annette laughs up to him.

  I turn around horrified; I cannot believe this was I really that bad?

  When’s the last time you thought about killing something, or had vodka?

  Oh, well then, I guess I was that bad. I haven’t even gone for the vodka even though I’ve had a pretty bad discussion with Lucien. Some kind of way I’d cooled my anger, without alcohol, without Jack. Kick-ass Jae at your service. I smile for no reason.