Undercurrents

by Traci Hunter Abramson

  Suddenly, getting to class on time was the last thing on his mind. The main display area in the atrium of the modern building had been changed over the weekend. Now, framed in black lacquer, the eight sketches of Shaye Kendall were prominently displayed inside the main entrance.

  Matt had dreamed of having his work displayed here, the prized location on campus. Never had he expected to have such mixed feelings when it finally happened. He studied the exhibit for a moment longer. The drawings were hung on a large display board. In the center was the first drawing he had ever made of Shaye.

  Even though he had created these images of her, he found himself staring at them once again. Brandon had been right. She looked like she was hiding something, a secret she had so far been unwilling to share with him. Or had she? Matt wondered if the hurt he sometimes saw glimmering in Shaye’s eyes was from the loss of her father. Or could she truly be the missing swimmer Pete spoke of? But why would she hide such a thing from him?

  Something had kept him from challenging Shaye when he caught her in a lie. Somehow, he knew that this girl who insisted on paying the honest price for her coat had lied about her swimming capabilities. Though he was hardly an expert on the sport, even he knew that she was hiding her true talent by not swimming breaststroke. He had barely recognized her in the water when he had seen her exploding with such power, gliding to the wall. Only after she had switched to freestyle had he remembered about Chelsey and the reason he was at the pool.

  The secret was there. Matt could see it in the shadows of her eyes, even in the way he had re-created them on paper. He could only hope that someday she would trust him enough to share that secret with him—and when she did, he hoped that secret wouldn’t tear them apart.

  As the last few students hurried through the atrium, Matt tore himself away from his artwork and went to class. He hardly heard the teacher’s lecture. Instead, he kept trying to visualize how Shaye would react when he told her about the drawings. He had wanted to tell her about them over the weekend, but the opening just never presented itself. If he were really honest with himself, he would admit that he was too worried about her reaction to tell her about them when she had initially discovered his artistic abilities.

  When all of his classes were finally over for the day, Matt went to his art professor’s office. He found him inside grading papers.

  “I guess you’ve seen the new display downstairs.” Professor Hartley smiled at Matt.

  Matt nodded. “When was it put up?”

  “Wednesday afternoon.” The professor motioned for Matt to sit down. “I was very impressed with the series. A number of people have stopped by to compliment your work.”

  “That’s very kind of you to say,” Matt began, wondering if he could bring himself to ask the professor to take down the display.

  “Not at all. Your sketches seem to evoke an emotional response. Since the display went up, I’ve seen several people admiring it.”

  “Really?” The artist in Matt was ecstatic that his work was being so well received, yet the practical side of him wished he had known about the display so he could have spoken to Shaye about it first.

  Professor Hartley nodded. “It’s a job well-done. I’m looking forward to seeing how your work progresses next semester.”

  “Thank you, Professor.” Matt stood up and left the office, realizing he had no choice. He was going to have to tell Shaye about the drawings.

  * * *

  Shaye located the newspaper article after a brief, ten-minute search. The computerized library system allowed her to access the periodicals on the computer screen in front of her. Her picture on the front page of the Arizona Republic’s sport section stared back at her. Shaye glanced at the date. August 12.

  The article outlined the surprise in the swimming community when Christal Jones failed to compete in the Arizona Senior State meet. The article went on to talk about Christal’s disappearance from Phoenix and the sources who suspected she was not going to attend Stanford after she had failed to show up for her campus visit.

  Hearing footsteps behind her, Shaye quickly logged off of the computer terminal and gathered her things. She took the long way to her first class, ensuring that she wouldn’t see Matt on her way. She had been relieved that he hadn’t shown up after practice to have breakfast with her.

  She tried to concentrate on what her professors were saying during the class, but she hardly heard a word. The anticipation of seeing Matt was tying her stomach in knots. The thought of seeing him around campus and in church after she broke up with him was even worse. Had it not been for swimming, she would have welcomed the chance to relocate again. At least then she wouldn’t have to tell Matt she couldn’t see him again. She would have just disappeared.

  After classes, Shaye grabbed a sandwich at the deli across from campus. She then went and found a quiet spot in the girls’ locker room. With a couple of hours until practice, Shaye started on her homework. Though she would have been more comfortable in her dorm room, she no longer felt safe here at Royal. Until she knew that the surveillance team was in place, Shaye was afraid to follow her usual routine. Besides, if she wasn’t in her dorm room, she didn’t have to worry about Matt calling.

  When her cellular phone started ringing, the locker room was empty. She let it ring twice as she made sure she was really alone, then flipped it open with a tentative “Hello?”

  “This is Doug Valdez,” a male voice said, not waiting for acknowledgment. “Meet me at the ice-cream parlor next to campus at six o’clock tonight.”

  “Six?” Shaye repeated.

  “Yes. I’ll be wearing a Denver Broncos sweatshirt, and I’ll be sitting at the table in the back.”

  “Okay.” Shaye nodded to the empty locker room. “I’ll see you then.”

  She turned back to her reading assignments, but she wasn’t able to focus. She was glad when she could finally get into the pool and find her rhythm. Her mind churned as she stroked through the water. What was she going to tell Matt when he wanted to know why she was breaking up with him?

  Practice went by much too quickly, and to Shaye’s dismay, Matt was sitting in the bleachers above her when she got out of the pool. She took her time showering, and she even spent a full ten minutes blow drying her hair. Finally, she mustered up all of her courage and stepped out of the locker room.

  “Shaye!” Matt motioned to her from down the hall.

  Shaye froze for a moment. She wanted desperately to just run the other way. Matt continued to wait for her, and Shaye forced her feet to move.

  “Can you have dinner with me tonight?” Matt asked, nervously raking a hand through his hair. “I need to talk to you.”

  “I’m sorry. I already have plans.” Shaye fingered the strap to her bag and avoided looking at his face.

  “Oh.” Matt thought for a moment. “How about breakfast in the morning?” Mustering up all of her willpower, she shook her head.

  “I can’t.”

  “Why not?” Matt reached out and took her hand, forcing her to look at him.

  “I can’t see you anymore.” Shaye pulled back to break contact with him. Suddenly she was so cold. She saw the hurt in his eyes, but forced herself to deal the final blow. “Good-bye, Matt.”

  He stared at her, stunned, allowing Shaye to push the door open and run past him. Tears stung her eyes as the cold penetrated through to her bones. As she hurried to her dorm, she glanced behind her, grateful he didn’t follow. Explaining to him her real reasons for breaking up would be impossible, and inventing reasons were beyond Shaye’s capability at the moment.

  The phone was ringing when Shaye opened the door to her room. Ignoring it, she dropped her swim bag on the floor and then rushed back out the door. Though the ice-cream parlor was within walking distance, Shaye pulled her keys out of her purse and unlocked the door to her car. She rarely drove it since everything she needed was on campus, but Pratt had insisted that a car was a necessity, particularly if they ever had to pull her out f
ast.

  Wiping her eyes, Shaye tried to compose herself before pulling out of the parking lot. Her whole body ached, and her head was beginning to throb. She managed to find the ice-cream parlor, and scanned the parking lot, unable to spot a rental car. Battling back her fear, she parked and quickly walked inside.

  She soon spotted the dark-haired man in the back wearing the Denver Broncos sweatshirt. Approaching his table, Shaye was surprised at how young he was. Wearing faded jeans and his sweatshirt, he could have easily passed for another student. He smiled cordially as she approached and then stood up and pulled out her chair for her.

  “What do you want?” he asked.

  “Uh, chocolate frozen yogurt,” Shaye told him, taken aback by his question.

  The man she assumed was Doug nodded and went to the counter to order. He returned a few minutes later with two cups of frozen yogurt.

  “Have you talked to Matt?” he asked casually.

  Shaye nodded. “He was waiting for me after practice.”

  “And?” Doug waited, his dark brown eyes staring intensely.

  “And I told him I couldn’t see him anymore.” Shaye averted her eyes down to her frozen yogurt. She swirled her spoon in the dessert, finally taking a bite.

  “Did you give him a reason?” Doug prodded.

  Shaye shook her head, swallowing the tears that threatened.

  “Great,” Doug muttered. “If he’s as hung up on you as Pratt thinks he is, he will try to see you again.”

  “And what do you want me to do?” Shaye asked, momentarily letting anger overcome her pain. “I can’t believe how much you guys complicate my life.”

  “It’s for your own good,” Doug spoke quietly. He glanced around, apparently making sure no one was within hearing distance. “We’ll be here for two weeks. Just do everything you normally would so we can evaluate the situation.”

  “Except see Matt.”

  “Right.” Agent Valdez stood up. “Come on. I’ll walk you out.”

  Shaye picked up her frozen yogurt and followed him outside. As they approached Shaye’s car, she asked, “Do you have a number where I can reach you if I run into trouble?”

  Doug handed her a slip of paper. “That’s for my cell phone. If for some reason you can’t get in touch with me, call Pratt.”

  Shaye nodded and got into her car.

  “I’ll be seeing you around campus.” Doug closed her door and then went to his car, a blue Mustang that was indistinguishable from a dozen others just like it on campus.

  As Shaye drove back to her dorm, she noticed Doug following her. He parked a few spaces down from her, watching her move safely into her building. She then climbed the stairs to her room, wondering if she would ever lead a normal life again.

  Chapter Fourteen

  For the first time since swimming season began, Shaye struggled to get up the next morning. Sleep had evaded her through most of the night as she slipped from one restless dream to another. Her upcoming finals held little concern compared to what the surveillance team might find, or, more specifically, what they might miss.

  As she walked to the aquatics center, she kept replaying her last meeting with Matt. The look on his face haunted her. If only she could confide in him and explain the real reasons she couldn’t see him anymore. As much as she hated it, she was sworn to secrecy. No one could know about her past or her life would be in danger. And anyone who knew her true identity would be in jeopardy as well. It was as simple as that. She trusted Matt implicitly, but she knew she had to honor Pratt’s instructions.

  Once at practice, Shaye put all of her nervous energy into her swimming. Her pounding headache from the night before had been reduced to a dull ache, and each lap helped her leave some of the stress behind.

  As she worked with her relay team to prepare for their upcoming meet, Shaye was too emotionally numb to notice the resentment a few team members had toward her. Her thoughts were caught up in her own situation and the bleak loneliness she faced.

  Looking up into the bleachers never even occurred to Shaye as she left the pool that morning. Wearing jeans and a hooded sweatshirt, she emerged from the locker room unprepared to come face-to-face with Matt.

  “We need to talk,” he insisted, his muscular frame suddenly more intimidating.

  “We don’t have anything to talk about,” Shaye said, her voice barely more than a whisper.

  Doug’s sudden presence beside her came as a complete surprise, and Shaye hoped she hid it well. “Come on, Shaye.”

  The surprise in Matt’s eyes quickly turned to anger. His features hardened, and Shaye felt the strength she had rebuilt during practice drain with the color from her cheeks. She wanted to reach out to him, to comfort him with the truth, but Doug steered her away.

  As soon as they were out of Matt’s sight, Shaye shook off Doug’s arm and stepped away. Anger and hurt filled her voice. “What was that all about?”

  “Now Matt knows the reason you broke up with him.” Doug turned to face her.

  “I could have come up with something a little less harsh.” Shaye’s voice broke. “I can’t believe you did that!”

  “Look, my job is to know how people will react and turn the situation in my favor. That’s what I did.” Doug continued walking down the sidewalk, apparently expecting Shaye to fall into step. “I told you yesterday that Matt would try to see you again. After this morning, he’s much less likely to try.”

  “Well, thank you so much for your help,” Shaye said sarcastically.

  “You’re welcome.” Doug smiled, ignoring her sarcasm.

  “Are you always this annoying?” Shaye asked, wondering how she could stand dealing with him for two weeks.

  “Always,” Doug replied immediately. “I have to check in. I’ll see you later.”

  “Not if I can help it,” Shaye muttered, bracing herself against the cold.

  * * *

  Matt pulled his keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door to the church. The building was quiet as the sun began to set, and he hoped a few hours in the clerk’s office would help him erase the image of Shaye with somebody else.

  Not telling her about the sketches had been a mistake, but he had never imagined she would go running into someone else’s arms as soon as she saw them. In fact, he had rather hoped her reaction would have been exactly the opposite.

  Even though his prayers were filled with questions about her, answers evaded him. He had felt strongly impressed to confront her and explain about the display, but he had never expected to see another reason for their breakup standing in front of him. He had come up with hundreds of explanations about the man with Shaye that morning. An old boyfriend had come back into her life. She had been dating both of them at the same time and just never told him. He had even tried to convince himself that the guy was her older brother, but he knew she didn’t have one.

  He hadn’t thought she was capable of this. The kind, vulnerable girl he had fallen in love with had suddenly become distant and callous. Yet, even when she broke up with him, he could feel her holding something back. He didn’t understand how he could have been so wrong about someone, or how the woman he loved could change into someone else overnight.

  Still, the nagging memory of her lie to Judge Rush haunted him. Her actions had always proven her to be honest, yet she had lied without hesitation to him about her ability to swim breaststroke. But then, Matt had also been convinced that Shaye had returned his love, and her actions had shown he had been wrong about that too.

  Matt flipped on the computer in the clerk’s office and pulled a stack of papers from his inbox. Methodically, he began logging in the new membership records received from Salt Lake. An hour later, he stared at the last paper in the stack.

  Membership record not found: Shaye Kendall.

  Matt picked up the phone and dialed a number to Salt Lake. The man on the other end was helpful and thorough, and after several minutes of searching, he and Matt reached the same conclusion. Shaye Kendall
was not a baptized member of the Church.

  * * *

  “If she’s so great, why isn’t she swimming at a Division I school like UVA or Tech?” Denise demanded.

  Shaye stopped right inside the locker room door, her stomach sinking. She had little experience being talked about behind her back, but Denise’s tone left little doubt Shaye was the topic of conversation.

  “Maybe she thought we were Division I,” Vicky replied. “The football and baseball teams here both are. She might have just assumed that the swim team was too.”

  “Even she can’t be that stupid,” Denise snorted, obviously pleased by the few chuckles her comment elicited.

  The conversation stopped immediately when someone noticed Shaye by the doorway. Vicky looked up at her, then quickly looked away, as did several other members of the team. Only Denise seemed unconcerned that their conversation may have been overheard.

  Shaye pushed past the group of girls without a word, refusing to let the hurt show. She had already known that Denise was on a rampage about Shaye swimming anchor on the A relay team in their upcoming meet. Now it seemed Denise had sought to garner support over the past week leading up to today’s meet. Even Vicky had continued to distance herself from Shaye as Shaye’s status on the team grew to that of a social leper.

  As much as Shaye’s dilemma with Matt weighed on her, it was now overshadowed by this whole new set of problems on her team. Lack of sleep was already affecting her, and her emotions were dangerously close to the surface as Denise was clearly complaining about her to anyone who would listen.

  Gone were the days when Shaye had enjoyed her own mini fan club, friends who cheered for her and stood by her no matter what. Even during high school meets when she competed against some of her teammates from her year-round team, Shaye and her friends routinely cheered for each other. The day she had made her first national cut for the 100 breaststroke, everyone had celebrated her accomplishment. Not one of her teammates had harbored any resentment toward her for her success.