Brawl: A Bully Romance (King of Castleton Book 3)

by Ellie Meadows

  Solid ground. No quicksand.

  I liked Drake. And he liked me.

  “Why didn’t you come to the door, goof.” I smiled at him, shoving my hands into my pockets and trying not to run towards him. I had a modicum of self-control left.

  “Just tired. And I didn’t feel like twenty questions with your parents.”

  “They went out to dinner, actually.” I cocked a thumb back at the house. “Lots of empty rooms in there.” I was close enough to him now to reach out and touch. I wrapped hands around his waist and grinned. “We could… you know…” I let my voice trail off, sort of dancing my hips back and forth. “Pick up where we left off at the lake.”

  Drake shuffled his feet and took a step away from me.

  I couldn’t read his expression, but the way he moved far enough away so that my hands on him fell away, that I understood.

  “What’s wrong?” I crossed my arms, hurt flooding through my body.

  “Nothing, nothing.” Drake rushed forward, his arms lifting, hands reaching for me, and then those same fingers flexed and lowered again. “Nothing’s wrong, Tarryn. It old you the dinner at Grandmother’s was hard. I’m just a little off.”

  “But you said it was good too?” I bit my lower lip, watching his face war between emotions.

  “Yeah,” he ran his hands through his hair. A nervous gesture. “My grandmother is a grade A monster, but apparently there’s no one else in our shitshow of a family worthy of inheriting.”

  “She’s… wait.” I stared blankly, thinking. “Are you saying she wants to leave you everything? What about your father and mother?”

  “What about them? Screw ‘em. They’ve never given two shits about me.”

  I uncrossed my arms and moved close enough to grip his forearm. “They’re your parents. Of course they care about you.”

  Drake pushed me away, not hard, but not so gentle either. “What do you know about it, Tarryn? You live here,” he pointed towards my house, “in your perfect little home with your great parents. You don’t know how hard my life is. We have money. Great. Awesome. I’m a fucking basket case, Tarryn.”

  Drake turned away from me, and his tall frame seemed sized-down several inches as he slumped over with his arms crossed.

  “Hey, hey. It’s okay.” I walked around his body so I could face him. Cupping his chin, I tilted his face up. “We’ve all got stuff we hate. About ourselves. About our families. It’s normal, Drake. Totally normal.” I moved closer, coming up on tiptoes so I could press my lips to his.

  I kept that position for a while, my mouth touching his, until I tasted salty wetness.

  Drake was crying.

  I stopped kissing him and pulled his body against mine in a hug. He didn’t need kisses right now. Didn’t need the intimacy of a girlfriend. He just needed a friend.

  I wondered how many times in his life he’d been properly hugged.

  His body shook as I held him.

  “It’s okay, Drake. Everything’s fine.”

  “You don’t understand,” he murmured against my hair, “it’s not fine. No matter how hard I try, it’s not fine.”

  He stood up away from me and swiped a palm across his eyes.

  I smiled up at him, soft and kind.

  “You want to come in just to hang out? We can put on a movie, pop some corn. I’ve even got a couple of year-old candy bars stuffed in a kitchen drawer somewhere. Just in case I get dizzy.” I winked at him.

  And he almost returned my smile.

  Almost.

  “I think I should go, Tarryn. I’m not great right now.”

  “You don’t have to be great, Drake. You can feel like shit. That’s what friends are for—to be there when it’s good and when it’s bad.” I took him by the hand and pulled him towards the house. To my surprise, he let me.

  And we did just what I offered.

  We picked a corny movie. Made movie theater buttered popcorn. Dug through the stash of old candy bars and ate more than we should have. We didn’t make out, kissing and touching and being romantic.

  We were just friends.

  Together.

  And I wondered if Drake healed a little from it. Or if the interaction was so foreign, that he couldn’t come to terms with what I was offering him.

  ##

  “Thanks for tonight.” Drake hovered in the doorway. He looked better, his coloring good, his voice more normal.

  “Anytime,” I pulled a candy bar from my pocket. It was slightly mushy, warm. I held it out to him. “For the road home.”

  “Sweet,” he laughed, taking it from me.

  “I’m glad you’re better. If you need me, I’m here. And not as… a girlfriend. If that’s what I am.”

  “I want you to be.”

  “What?”

  He shrugged, shoving his hands into his pocket and looking sheepish. “I want you to be my girlfriend.”

  I couldn’t stop the grin that spread my lips. I had to look like an idiot. Before I could respond though, he spoke again.

  “But I don’t deserve that.” The sheepishness was gone, replaced by stoicism. “After all the things I’ve done. After what I’ve done, I don’t deserve liking someone like you.”

  “Don’t say that.” I closed the space between us and kissed him again.

  “Hey, thought this was a friendship night.” His lips moved against mine, sending tingles down my spine.

  “Can’t a teensy bit of romance sneak in?”

  It dawned on me then that he didn’t actually kiss me back. It felt like it because his lips moved when he was talking, but he hadn’t responded when I’d first pressed my mouth to his.

  Again, hurt shot through my system, and I pulled away. “You didn’t,” I covered my lips with one hand, “you didn’t kiss me back.”

  “Course I did,” Drake spoke softly, averting his eyes.

  “No, no you didn’t.”

  “It wasn’t on purpose, Tarryn.”

  I frowned at him and shrugged.

  “Fine.” He destroyed the separation between us and gathered me into his arms. When his mouth found mine, it was warm and wet like he’d licked his lips. He kissed me ferociously, with unfailing determination. His tongue pushed into my mouth, between my teeth which I parted happily.

  The kiss ended as fast as it had started.

  And I was breathless. And felt like I should feel satisfied, convinced that Drake was okay, that we were okay. But there was the niggling in my middle, a renewed worry.

  Quicksand.

  “So, no chance of seeing you at school tomorrow then?”

  “Not tomorrow. But Tuesday definitely.”

  “And you won’t tell me why, right?” I nudged at him, not wanting him to leave because I felt like when he did, things would shift. I didn’t know why or how, but they would.

  “A guy has to keep some of his mysteries.” He cocked a half smile, but it was fleeting. “It’s only a day. You’ll live.” He pressed a palm to the side of my face. I tilted my head against the warmth.

  “Okay,” I murmured. “Whatever you need. But you promise you’re okay?”

  “I’m fine.” He kept his hand against my cheek. It felt real. The touch grounded me.

  “And we’re okay too?”

  He hesitated, and that only made the seed of anxiety grow larger in my body.

  “Yeah, we’re okay too,” he finally said, but god his voice sounded empty.

  I watched him walk across the street and get into his car.

  My parents pulled into our driveway as I was waving goodbye to him.

  Steeling myself, I pushed down my feelings and plastered on a pleasant smile. I sounded normal when I greeted them. Laughed at how badly mom had frustrated the waiter by asking for five changes to a menu item. I acted like I was standing on solid ground and nothing could rock me.

  But…

  Quicksand.

  19.

  D R A K E

  &

  T A R R Y N

 
(perspective, alternating first)

  Tarryn-

  I resisted texting Drake after he left.

  I resisted texting him in the morning.

  I tried not to think about him as I talked with Sasha. Even when she lamented Steve’s broken nose and Drake’s involvement, I tried to ignore every time she said his name. And it was hard to ignore that part—especially when Steve showed up looking like he’d been at the bitter end of a boxing match gone bad.

  Somehow, I made it through the day.

  Almost.

  I made it through the school day at least.

  Me: Today go okay? Whatever it was?

  Me: You don’t need to answer.

  Me: I’m being nosey.

  I bit my nails for twenty minutes until he answered.

  Drake: All good. Hope school was okay.

  Me: Same as always.

  I waited for him to reply, but he didn’t.

  So I went on a run. Because that always helped.

  Only this time it didn’t.

  #

  Drake-

  I’d told my dad I was ill.

  He’d didn’t give a fuck enough to question if I was actually sick.

  “Clean up after yourself. I can’t afford to get sick right now.” He’d barely looked at me as he spoke. His son was sick, but all he cared about was getting sick too and missing work.

  More like missing the secretary he liked to fuck.

  “Sure thing, Dad. Thanks for caring. I’ll be sure to bleach every surface I touch, even the custom upholstered sofas.”

  “Don’t be a smart ass.”

  “How about be a parent and worry more that your son is sick versus him making you sick,” I snapped back, opening the fridge and reaching in for the orange juice.

  “Drake,” he began, but then shook his head, “call the doctor if you spike a fever. I’ll see you after work.”

  And he left me to my own devices.

  So I could think, and stew, and wallow.

  The day was a blur. Television shows in the background that I didn’t actually watch.

  I looked at Tarryn’s parting gift several times—the candy bar that had melted a bit and than re-solidified. I both wanted to eat it to be close to her, and didn’t want to eat it because being close to her was something I was avoiding today.

  Around 3, my phone vibrated.

  Tarryn: Today go okay? Whatever it was?

  Tarryn: You don’t need to answer.

  Tarryn: I’m being nosey.

  Three messages. One. Two. Three. Sweet. Nice. Not trying to be invasive.

  I should tell her the truth.

  Instead of avoiding her like a goddamn coward.

  Me: All good. Hope school was okay.

  Tarryn: Same as always.

  I wanted to write another message.

  Coward.

  I didn’t.

  #

  Tarryn-

  He never wrote back.

  And I barely slept all night. And when I did doze off, I was standing in my house in my Homecoming dress, waiting for Aiden to pick me up.

  Only it wasn’t Aiden.

  And it wasn’t Drake.

  It was me… on the other side of the door.

  And when I saw my second self, she started falling apart. Millions of sand particles.

  I dressed carefully for school.

  A pale blue tunic that made me think of Drake’s eyes.

  Jeans, torn at the knee, but still cute and serviceable.

  I pulled my hair up in a bun.

  And then I grabbed my running shoes instead of something that matched better. I didn’t know why. Maybe because I felt I might need to run today.

  #

  Drake-

  I drove to school and parked in my usual spot. An hour early. Not many people arrived yet. I stayed in the car, tilting the seat back and closing my eyes. I wanted to crank the engine and drive away. I didn’t want to be here.

  But I’d hidden for an entire day. Hidden until… what? My grandmother would come back home and tie up the ragged ends of the shit show I’d created?

  I’d called the house and left a message with Nelly. Grandmother was supposed to arrive any time now. She’d call me, I’d tell her what had happened, and before I walked into school for the day, the Castleton cash cow would be setting things in motion.

  I just had to wait, breathe, and survive the next few minutes.

  A knock at my window pulled me from my rhythmic breathing.

  Opening my eyes, I found Tabitha’s face staring in at me.

  The just-below-the-surface anger blossomed. I rolled the window down a few inches.

  “What do you want, Tabs?”

  “You know the answer to that.”

  “That shit’s over.” I glowered, balling my hands into fists. They seemed to stay in that position lately—always ready to strike out at something. My brain always on the lookout for pain.

  “Maybe. For now. But eventually you know that your Miss Perfect is going to find out about us. And then? I might be the only one who’ll have you.” She winked and sauntered away, hips shaking and too-short skirt riding up.

  I couldn’t wait any longer. I picked up my cell and dialed Grandmother’s house again. Nelly answered on the fourth ring.

  “Master Drake, I’m sorry, but your Grandmother hasn’t arrived yet. It really should be any minute.” Nelly’s voice was apologetic.

  “Dammit,” I mumbled, pushing my head into the seat cushion and covering my face with one hand. “Thanks, Nelly. Just figured I’d try.”

  “Are you sure you’re alright?”

  “Sure, sure. I’m fine Nelly. Thanks.”

  #

  Tarryn-

  I saw Drake’s car as soon as my mom pulled up to the curb to drop me off.

  He was here, like he said he’d be.

  Why didn’t that make me happier?

  Telling mom to have a good day, I got out of the car and waved her off. I stood, uncertain whether to walk to the parking lot or to the usual tree I sat next to until the first bell rang. Sasha didn’t seem to be here yet. She’d taken to waiting for me there if she got here first, or finding me there if she got here after my arrival. It was sort of our spot now.

  After a deep breath, I made my decision.

  Each step took a conscious effort.

  “Hey, Tarryn.” A girl voice called to me and I immediately smiled nicely, looking for the speaker so I could greet her.

  My smile froze when I saw it was manic pixie girl. Tabitha.

  I didn’t say anything to her. My throat felt dry. The way she was looking at me…as if she knew something I didn’t. Unkind eyes, smirking face.

  #

  Drake-

  The bell was going to ring in about ten minutes and my grandmother hadn’t called yet. I sighed, getting out of the car and locking it. Tabitha would keep her promise long enough for me to make sure she would. There wasn’t any other way for this to go. Castleton confidence to the rescue. I looked out at the town road beyond the parking lot. I hadn’t been paying attention to drop-offs, and didn’t know if Tarryn was here yet.

  “So, you did come to school. I thought you might skip again.”

  Turning around, I found Tarryn walking towards me, Castleton High looming behind her like a modern giant. Blue looked great on her. Her hair was swept up in a messy bun, strands hanging down artfully around her face.

  “I figured you couldn’t live more than one day without me.” I walked around the car towards her, telling myself to keep it light and breezy. Everything would be right as rain soon.

  “I don’t know. We squares are pretty solid. It’s you circles that need a little help staying grounded.” She held her hand out to me and I took it.

  We’d never held hands at school.

  Hell, I’d never held hands with anyone at school. Not like this.

  People turned to look at us as we walked out of the parking lot and towards, what I’d come to think of as,
Tarryn’s tree.

  I just had to keep it together until I talked to Grandmother.

  No big deal.

  20.

  T H E

  P H O T O S

  Tuesday afternoon at Castleton High

  (perspective, third)

  They were almost to the tree, holding hands and smiling.

  “Wow, everyone really does stare at you. Castleton Charm, huh?” Tarryn teased, poking Drake in the side. In the distance, she saw Tabitha again. She looked away quickly. The girl’s face was contorted, ugly. Tarryn didn’t want to focus on that. She just wanted to hug on Drake and be happy in this moment. He was here, things were fine. They were okay.

  “Maybe they’re staring at you, Square. You’re looking pretty fetch today.”

  “Fetch? Who the heck says that?”

  “Me,” he nuzzled the top of her head and she giggled.

  About five minutes before the bell rang, Sasha and Steve arrived. Steve grumbled a ‘hello’ in Drake’s direction, but then ignored him. Drake couldn’t blame his friend. His face looked like hell. Crooked nose, bruises around the eyes.

  Drake was about to say sorry, when all around them, phones began suddenly pinging. Tarryn and Drake, happily embracing only moments before, pulled away from one another in confusion and looked around.

  “What’s going on?” Tarryn was still half smiling, a hand resting on Drake’s forearm.

  “Don’t know. Probably some sort of viral video. A skateboarding dog was all the rage two years ago. Spread like wildfire.” Sasha shrugged and then touched Steve’s nose.

  “Listen, woman, I already told you. That hurts like fuck.” Steve bopped Sasha on the head. She laughed.

  “And I told you to deal with it. You’re nurse knows what’s best.”

  “You’d kill a patient.” But Steve didn’t sound angry, not a bit, and he rushed in for a quick kiss on Sasha’s cheek.

  Tarryn shook her head, laughter bubbling out of her mouth. “You two are crazy.”

  “Crazy in love,” Steve said with gusto and pulled Sasha into his body.

  More phones pinged. Someone gasped nearby.