WEAKENED: The Manhattan Bound Series Book One

by Juliet Braddock

  “I won’t dismiss your issues, Drew,” she said. “Please don’t think I’ve forgotten them in light of my own…”

  Her voice, pleading so delicately and sweetly, resonated against the worries that sat upon his shoulders throughout the entire afternoon. She’s too good for you, Mack. She’s just too fucking empathetic. Don’t let this deter you…take a step back…let her be herself…and let you be…be…?

  “One thing at a time, little one,” he soothed and dashed his lips over her knuckles. Fuck, he hoped he wasn't in way over his head. To God, Drew prayed that Maxine upheld the strength he could see in her. He hoped they could only find the courage within each other.

  As they strolled arm-in-arm through the lobby of the hospital, Maxine covered her nose and mouth with her hand, fearing already that she might throw up. It was that odor—of illness and medicine and disinfectants that pervaded any medical facility—that always throttled her back to the last weeks of her mother’s life. As she endeavored to explain her sudden misery to Drew, he hustled her quickly toward the sliding front doors.

  “Come back to my place?” he asked. “We can just order take-out or something…but I don’t want to leave you alone.”

  “That…that would be nice, Drew…”

  “And I also want to hear more about your thoughts on today,” he added. “I know this was so much to take in.”

  Too worn to fight his suggestions, even though she just wanted to head back to her own place and fall into bed, she acquiesced and followed his lead to his always waiting car.

  Lou asked no questions, and maybe Drew would confide in him later, but he couldn’t fight the pang of sympathy for that young woman as the two crawled into the backseat and snuggled up. She’d been crying. She obviously had some serious medical problems to attend since they’d spent the day hurrying from one doctor to the next. He could only hope that Mack wasn’t biting off more than he could chew with this one.

  The rain hadn't stopped falling all afternoon. When they'd finally pulled up to the curb beside his building after hustling through some rough rush hour traffic, Drew got out and held an umbrella over Maxine’s head, caring not if he got drenched himself. Yeah, Lou was his driver, but there was no point in asking him to get out and do something so frivolous. Even Drew could admit that his wealthy counterparts in society could be so damn pretentious.

  There they were again, slugging through the puddles on the sidewalk together. However, Maxine found some comfort in the downpour. She’d always loved a good storm, be it rain or snow. Now the weather paralleled her life, and she decided to do what she always did—simply embrace it all.

  Shaking out his wet umbrella, Drew left it near the door in the lobby just so that he could hold her close. His actions weren’t born of Domination and submission, and he hoped that she realized his motives stemmed from his absolute concern.

  “Tired?” he asked once he’d nestled her against him in the elevator en route to the penthouse.

  “A little…” she said and propped her chin against his chest to mind his worried gaze. “But this is all for the good of myself.”

  “And you’re worth it, little one,” he reminded her. “You’re worth every second of your precious life. Don’t forget that…”

  Maxine kicked her shoes off just inside the foyer and made a straight line for the couch while Drew allowed his words to sink in. Recognizing the best in others was his strength, but he far too often ignored his own potential. On the surface, he was a confident man—brimming with talent and a career that headed clearly on the upswing. He'd been fortunate enough to share in his family's wealth to allot him the lifestyle he lived, but he'd also worked hard with plenty of failures along the way. It wasn't the achievements he remembered, however.

  Still, he couldn't shake his nightmares of the pounding and screaming and filth. He could smell the stench and feel the pain—always emotional but frequently physical. And the crying never ceased until everyone seemed to be asleep in that house of horrors. While he fought gallantly to burn those images and sweep them away into a pile of ash, he knew that he never would forget.

  So thankful for the distance between them, Drew shook his head furiously to rid his mind of those disturbing days and struggled to focus on Maxine. Now wasn’t the time for him to drift backward. He’d dealt with that in his own way. Sometimes it was easier to brush those memories aside than others, but ever since he’d met Maxine, his remembrances began to flourish.

  Usually, his happiness made it so easy for Drew to ignore his past. However, with Maxine, everything was different. She'd whirled into his life, and with her, she brought honesty and kindness—so much that he considered that maybe it was time to submit to someone else's generosity rather than masking his troubles with altruism. Perhaps Maxine's presence was some trip of Karma, forcing him to seek peace with his agony…even if she decided not to stay for long.

  Ordering himself to gain his complete composure, he took a few long strides toward Maxine, sat down on the couch next to her and lifted her into his lap. With a kiss to her forehead, he asked, “How about Ramen tonight?”

  “Ramen noodles?” she giggled. “You mean the cheap, heat and eat stuff in a Styrofoam cup that you live on in college because you can’t afford anything else?”

  “No, silly,” he said, his eyes narrowing. “The gourmet kind. Thick, wheat noodles in broth. Shall I pull up a menu?”

  “That sounds wonderful,” she said, scooting slightly in his embrace to allow him access to his phone in his pocket.

  Delight filtered through his sad smile. He adored that she was allowing herself to be adventuresome in her food choices that evening, exploring a cuisine that she never knew existed. Getting her to keep it all down was another matter completely, Drew knew. But after today, he hoped they were on the right track.

  “Let me order,” he said, searching for his Seamless restaurant delivery app on his phone. Food anywhere at any time. Oh, the wonders of modern technology in a city like Manhattan. “And then we’ll talk…”

  Within a couple of swipes, dinner was on its way. Drew placed his phone on the table, within reach, just in case the noodle shop had any questions, and then returned his full attention to Maxine.

  “Tell me about today, little one,” he persuaded her and gave a squeeze to her shoulders.

  “Well, in some ways…” she began, “I’m sort of used to all of it by now. I’ve been to so many doctors at this point that it’s…it’s an annoyance that’s become second nature to me.”

  “You do, though, understand that I just want you to be well again,” he insisted. “You’re far too young and too intelligent to ruin your life like this.”

  “And consciously, I know that,” she admitted. “But I also know that I can’t do this on my own—without medical attention.”

  Settling back, he attempted to relax, or at least to offer Maxine the illusion that he wasn’t feeling so very uncomfortable. “Do you think you’ll be fine with out-patient help? I know you spent some time in rehabilitation. Do you think this is enough?”

  “Well, considering I can’t just put off starting my job, Drew,” she said, “I’ll make this work for me. I have to keep reminding myself that even though my dad is far away…I’m…”

  “You’re not alone…” he finished her sentence for her.

  I hope you can stick this out with me, she thought with absolute desperation as she took his hands in hers and squeezed with all her might.

  “And you can do this, Maxine,” he said. “I have every bit of confidence in you. You’ve already survived. You have the strength. You just need to pull it out, cling to it and remember that.”

  Now when are you going to tell me about your hurt, Drew?

  That something dark, hiding in his true blue eyes, always veiled his stare. Maxine noticed that he had a tendency, if only for mere seconds, to slip away to another world where dread entrenched him. Bleakness lingered in the folds of the man whom she was growing to adore quite fondly.


  “In time, I hope you’ll talk to me, Drew,” she whispered. “You’ve been so caring of me. And I’m trying so hard to be there for you, too…”

  His chest heaved with a sigh. She understood without even knowing the full story. However, he couldn't dare to reveal the complete truth.

  Although he didn’t answer her, Maxine assured him, “I’ll wait, Drew, until you’re ready.”

  Jaw tightening until his teeth hurt in their clench, he gripped her tighter. How he wanted nothing more than to just claim her as his own. However, one thing he couldn't force her to do was stay.

  When at last their dinner arrived, Drew reluctantly released her so that he could deactivate the alarm system while the delivery guy made his way up in the elevator. He took great lengths to protect his home. This was the one place in the world where he needed to maintain his safety.

  “Where would the little one like to eat this evening?” Drew asked, his arms filled with bags of clearly too much food. “Dining room, kitchen…or…we could eat on the floor and I’ll light a fire?”

  A somewhat sleepy smile brightened her face. “That last option would be lovely, but doesn’t that take some effort?”

  After setting the food down on the coffee table, Drew picked up the remote. “Instant fire. Gas fireplace.” Then he reached for her hands to help her to stand. “Simple. Now we just need some cushions.”

  Essentially, he’d build a makeshift lounge around the fire with a cluttering of throw pillows he’d collected throughout the room. Flicking on the stereo with another remote and filling the room with Duran Duran's last album, Drew squatted to sit beside her. The stone hearth was tall enough to serve as a table, but Drew stopped her short of picking up the plastic fork that she'd found in the delivery bag.

  “What the hell are you doing?”

  “I'm…” She looked at her fork, and then realization flooded her face as she took note of the chopsticks in his hand. “You know…they say that women look for their fathers when they seek out relationships with men, but clearly I've found my mother in you!”

  “You do not use a fork when you eat Japanese food!”

  “Said Judy Kirk!” Maxine shot back playfully. “I drop everything with chopsticks.”

  “Patience….have it with her, Mack. She’s had a rough day…”

  “Huh?”

  “Talking to my alter-ego,” he said and patted his thighs as he opened his legs. “Come here.”

  “Stand up. Sit down. Eat…” she bellyached as she scooted her ass along the floor and flopped into his lap once again. “And that is the whole point of this exercise, correct? To engage in a meal together and to make sure that I’ve had some nutrition that you deem proper…?”

  Without further protest or explanation, he took her right hand and properly positioned the chopsticks, simultaneously hooking a tight arm around her waist to hold her always squiggling little body still. “You’re in my Kingdom now, little one, and I have a rather tight grip on you,” he said, unable to resist a little nip of her earlobe, catching her tiny emerald stud earring against his teeth. “And I’ll make sure that you’re not freed from our own little private prison until you’ve satisfied my desire for you to eat…and with chopsticks.”

  “Judy tried relentlessly,” she warned him. “And failed miserably.”

  “I am not Judy,” he said. “And I am going to prove to you this afternoon that you can indeed use chopsticks.”

  Placing his hand over hers, Drew manipulated her fingers with the utensils and managed to get her to twirl a noodle with those encompassing thin wooden sticks. Delicately, but obviously not careful enough, he splashed her a bit with the broth as he lifted the chopsticks to her lips. Giggling while she chewed, she knew she’d never be able to do this without the guidance of his hand.

  “Now what about the broth?” she questioned.

  “Spoon, Maxine…”

  “Oh, it’s permissible—just for the broth?”

  “Were you this incorrigible with your mother?” he wondered out loud.

  “Sometimes…”

  “Oh, for fuck’s sake…” he said as he took his hand from hers. “Now you try it yourself. I need to eat, too…”

  “You sound just like her—right down to the fuck,” she teased. “Judy had a mouth on her.”

  “I do think Judy and I would have gotten along quite nicely,” he said.

  In an effort to show him that she, too, could use chopsticks, Maxine worked fastidiously to grip and twirl another noodle, and then with the precision of a calligraphy artist, she brought the food to her mouth. “Mmmm…” she murmured as she reached for the spoon to sample some of the broth. “Not the college stuff I was used to.”

  “Told you so…” While Drew loved being right, he also reveled in the fact that she managed to lift her spirits a bit and have some fun with her foibles that afternoon.

  “So what are we listening to, Drew?” she asked.

  “Duet with Duran Duran and Ana Matronic from the Scissor Sisters,” he said before feeding himself, then stabbing at the remote to start the song again from the beginning. “It’s called ‘Safe (In the Heat of the Moment).’ Listen to the words…”

  “This isn’t Duran Duran. It’s disco!”

  “They were heavily influenced by Chic, little one.”

  “Ben says that only gay men love Duran Duran, you know…” she countered.

  “Maxine, there are some straight men who have grown up enough to admit that Duran has some pretty fucking amazing music,” he said. “I suggest—no, I insist—you give this song a listen. Reminds me of a couple of people I know…”

  Another tidbit that Judy always impressed upon her daughter: Pay attention to the lyrics. Don’t just groove to the beat of the song. Figure out what it’s saying and let it speak to you. So Maxine gave an honest listen.

  “He’s strong and somewhat cocky—but slightly weathered to his own lifestyle,” Maxine said. “But he offers her solace—in spite of his fears.”

  “Yup,” Drew agreed as he stood up and made a quick exit, but only to return with an uncorked bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon and two glasses.

  “Before you get your prescriptions filled, little one,” he said. “One last drink…”

  “You know…she’s tempting him in this song,” she noted and touched her glass to his.

  “Again, I played this little disco ditty for a reason,” he said. “To you, little one, on getting well again.”

  “I’ll drink to that,” she agreed, “but Drew, I am no seductress…”

  “So says you…” His sigh, teeming with exasperation, hissed against her ear. “Eat, Maxine…”

  “More orders and commands…”

  “Get used to it!” he said, stealing a quick kiss from her lips. “Just so long as you eat that with chopsticks…”

  “Drew…?”

  “Yes, little one?”

  Heart growing heavy again with his overwhelming generosity, she whispered, “I do appreciate what you've done for me today. And I know I might seem dismissive, but I truly am going to make an effort here. I have to take control of my life again. I had that at one time…but now…”

  “Maxine, darling, we all have our low points,” he assured her. “But you can’t neglect your own potential. And it is about control. If you can’t do it, then I’m happy to step in and do it for you—so long as it’s to your benefit.”

  Friday, I fucking hate you! she thought. Don’t leave me, Drew…please, don’t dismiss me. We both need each other too much…

  So again, she wrapped her fingers around those two damn chopsticks and picked up a slice of beef. With ease, she managed to move it to her mouth without incident. She and her mother shared many like traits, but impatience was their collective greatest downfall—in themselves and with each other. For Judy's sake, she continued to practice with those damn things, picking and pecking away until she was legitimately full from this practice round.

  Maybe…just maybe…Judy ha
d a hand in this whole thing with Drew. It was just a thought she wanted to keep to herself for now, but one that Maxine held closely to her heart.

  At last, she’d stretched out and yawned, shoving her plastic bowl toward Drew. For once, he didn’t fight with her to eat more.

  Nails scratching over her tummy to tickle, he asked, “Belly full?”

  Stretching her arms back behind her, she rested upon her palms. “Yes, Kindest of Sirs…”

  “So now what?” he asked.

  “A kiss—and a nap—would be lovely…” she hoped…begged…pleaded in the gentlest of fashions.

  “Oh, little one…” his lips met hers like two swatches of silk brushing together, “…that…I can oblige…”

  With the heat of the fire warming them, Drew plundered her lips in one single exploration, offering her the comfort of the kisses that she craved.

  “Ahhh…” she cooed.

  His lips never left hers as Drew leaned backward, taking Maxine with him, and collapsed upon the pillows he’d tossed about earlier. Without a trace of sexual provocation, she met his mouth with the same sweet affection that he dolled upon her. Sometimes, Maxine reasoned, kisses were just enough.

  Within minutes, she’d rested her head on his chest, and allowed the moment to calm her into slumber. Those rock hard muscles were so much more comfortable than the most expensive down pillow. And in his arms he coddled her until, right before that roaring fire, they both fell fast asleep, arms locked around each other…with two lonely hearts pounding against each other in their search for courage.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  As Maxine raked a brush through her thick and voluminous strands, fighting against the clock to get ready for Drew’s arrival, she had to physically stop herself for just one moment to take a good look in the mirror. Not so long ago, she remembered when she’d brush her hair, only to find a clump of hair had fallen into the sink. Right in front, the patch could be easily covered by her bangs and a few spritzes of hair spray. Over the last year, she’d perfected the art of masking her physical symptoms with smoke and mirrors. She had convinced herself that she could fix and hide any traces of her illness.