Resuscitate (Annihilate #1)

by S. Morayla

  Leslie looks up from her phone with a smirk. “Okay, bookstagramers.” She continues looking through my profile. “She likes hot dudes and bands. Also, clothes and makeup. She is sensitive with a big heart. Been through a sad time, but is still hopeful.” Leslie taps her phone before flicking her blonde hair over her shoulder.

  “Damn, you got all that from her profile?” Adriana asks, looking over at Leslie while I squirm in my seat. Who knew the few pictures I have there told all of that?

  “Yes, woman. Sheesh, pay attention,” Les replies.

  I avert my eyes over to the muscled guy walking in. His build is athletic and he has short, brown hair, but it’s a tad longer in front, giving it a messy sort of look. His clear, bright, glacier blue eyes roam the room, locking on mine. His long legs stride over toward our table.

  “Fucking hell, can’t I ever go anywhere without them following me around?” My eyes swing from the guy to Leslie. “I’m going to the bathroom. Be right back.” I watch as she walks a bit too fast toward the bathrooms, wondering who this guy is that has her reacting so strangely.

  “Ana, long time no see,” his husky voice drawls. Adriana rolls her eyes at the mystery guy.

  “Not fucking long enough. What do you want, Chris?” Adriana snarls, causing him to step back and put his hands up in defense.

  “I just wanted to say hi.” His eyes never leave my face, making my skin crawl.

  “Are you going to introduce me to your friend?” he asks.

  “Nope. Now, leave, you assshole.” Venom pours from Adriana’s lips.

  I have no idea who this guy is, but he’s obviously not welcome.

  Chris’ lips turn into a smirk. “I love you too, Adriana,” he says before throwing me a wink and walking away.

  A shudder runs through me. “Who was that guy?” I ask.

  “Just some douche who likes to stir the pot,” Adriana answers.

  Fly

  Three weeks into school and I have gotten my wish: homework, tons of homework, but it keeps my mind occupied. My phone dings, stirring me out of my thoughts.

  “Shit,” I mutter, grabbing my backpack before striding out the door. I was supposed to be at the café already. I’m usually there before the other two.

  “I already ordered. What took you so long? You usually beat me here,” Adriana asks as I pull out the chair.

  “Thanks. Sorry, I overslept.” My eyes sweep the café, looking for Leslie, who didn’t come back to the dorms last night, before settling back on Ana. “Where’s Les?” I ask.

  Grabbing her coffee cup, she takes a quick sip. “I was about to ask you that.”

  For the last few weeks, an odd and unexpected routine has occurred. Leslie, Adriana, and I have been coming here on certain days before class to study. Well, I study, they mostly just talk. It’s strange, but I enjoy their banter. I feel comfortable and welcome. My anxiety seems to settle when I’m with them. Last week, when my new therapist asked me about friendships, I didn’t mind the question. Before coming to college, when I was asked that, I would get anxiety. Re-learning is a process, especially when it comes to trust.

  “She didn’t show up last night. I texted her, but she never responded.” I tell her. Adriana shakes her head.

  “Figures,” she mutters. “I swear, that girl has no common courtesy. How did your quiz in English go?”

  “Not too bad. Literary devices in songs are a bit harder to figure out than I thought, but I love learning all that shit.” I laugh at Adriana’s puckered face.

  “I don’t know how the hell you can sit through that. I like to read, but learning more English than required is not for me.” I try not to laugh when she continues, telling me I should write all her essays since I love English.

  Gruff laughter fills the room and I slide my eyes to see three guys walking in. They seem different, their swagger a bit too much for this little café. One turns and looks toward our table before making his way over. A smile spreads across Adriana’s face and she jumps into his arms as he reaches our table.

  “Babe, what are you doing here? Don’t you have class?” Adriana gives him a chaste kiss. His smile and warm brown eyes are as big and bright as the moon. He looks at her like she is the only girl in the room. A pang of jealousy rips through me. A pair of soft green eyes used to look at me that way.

  “My class was cancelled and I missed you,” he coos, his British accent prominent. He drags the back of his finger down the contours of her face before gripping her chin and kissing her. I turn away, trying to give them a bit of privacy. I knew Adriana had a boyfriend from England, but when I hear his voice, I can’t help but smile. I love accents; they just make every word sound so sexy.

  “Oh shit. Sorry, Nat. This is my boyfriend Leif. Leif, this is Natalee.” I turn back to them, noticing Leif’s extended hand.

  “It’s good to finally meet you.” Leif says causing me to raise my eyebrows, shocked he knows who I am. “Ana talks about you,” he clarifies, when I take his hand in my own.

  “Geez, babe, you make it sound like I’m a stalker.” He grins down at her. My attention is taken away by an Irish accent.

  “Ana, how was your mornin’? I mean, after the whole ‘Oh God, Leif. Yes, right there!’” I look over to Adriana, my mouth hanging open. I can’t believe he just said that to her. His clear blue eyes blaze with mischief. They stand out against his blonde hair and fair skin.

  Adriana smirks. “You jealous you can’t go that long, Nick? There is a pill you can take that will keep you hard for more than two minutes, ya know.” Nick throws his head back in laughter.

  “Hey, I wanted to introduce you to Natalee. This is Les’ roommate,” Adriana tells him. All eyes turn back to me and I try not to fidget. I’m not comfortable being the center of attention.

  “This idiot is Nick, and that’s Lennon.” Adriana points to each of them. It’s nice to put a face to the names I’ve heard a lot about in the past few weeks.

  “Hi,” I say, less than confident. If they had met me two years ago, I would have probably asked them a million questions, but now, less is better.

  Lennon and Nick’s order is called and they breeze out just as quickly as they came in. Leif, Adriana, and I sit and wait for Leslie, who never shows nor sends a text. This is a norm for her, but I don’t dwell on it. I know she has parental and relationship issues. Half an hour later, Adriana and I leave, giving up on Leslie showing.

  * * *

  “Are you sure you want to go, Natalee?” Adriana asks me for the fifteenth time tonight. I blow out a breath, slow and calm. My heart is not racing and my anxiety isn’t looming over me like the grim reaper waiting in the wings. The air is still. Both Adriana and Leslie look at me, awaiting my response.

  I nod my head with finality. “Yes.” My voice wedges into the dead air, driving it out.

  Adriana eyes me warily, as if she’s expecting me to change my mind. I get it’s a big deal, but I feel like I’m ready to step out in the social scene. Leslie has asked me several times if I’d like to go with her one of Chance’s frat parties or some function, and I usually refuse. Adriana has asked me to hang out with her at her boyfriend’s house or to watch his band perform, and again, I have refused. Something weird happened this week, though. When we met at the café, they were talking about their weekends and what they did. I felt left out.

  Lonely.

  Restless.

  When I went to class, girls were talking about their adventures over the weekend, and I got jealous. Typically, I’m not the type to react this way, so I decided maybe my next step should be trying to go out.

  “If you need an escape, and trust me, you might, call me. Those parties can get a bit…um, crazy. With Chance and Les, you never know how the night will be. I can almost guarantee they will end up fighting. With her being upset, she’ll want to leave. Leif and I will be at The Corral.”

  “Ugh!” A protest escapes Leslie’s lips. “Shut up, Ana. We don’t always fight.”

  Adriana’s
eyes go wide as she looks at her friend. “Uh, yeah, okay then.” Turning back to me, she smiles and mouths, “All lies.”

  “I saw that. We don’t fight, we...just have loud discussions,” Leslie says, her voice stern.

  While Ana and I look at each other, her facial expression changes, causing us both to laugh.

  It feels gratifying.

  Dare I say, am I finally relaxing?

  College might just be bearable.

  “Who says that? Oh man, I can’t even with you, Leslie.” Adriana walks over to her best friend and gives her a hug, telling her she loves her and will talk to her later. She stops in the doorway, looking over her shoulder at me.

  “Remember, if you need me, just call.”

  I nod and smile.

  Music and cars fill the block. This is the first party I’ve been to since…well, since everything in my life went horrible. Anxiety blossoms, wrapping around my body like a boa constrictor.

  Breathe in, breathe out. You can do this, Natalee. Get a grip. Breathe, just…breathe.

  I close my eyes as the sweet voice fills my head. I cling to the syllables, each one giving me the ability and strength I need to continue walking. Leslie reaches over and takes my hand in hers.

  From the sidewalk, I stare up at house in front of me with Omega Kappa Zeta spelled out in Greek letters across the top. Two colossal staircases ensconced by huge hedges stand astute, the presence overwhelming. I look over to Les, my eyes wide.

  “It’s pretty daunting, isn’t it?” Leslie asks me.

  “Yeah,” I breathe out, thinking these guys could probably just run up and down these stairs to get exercise. Hot, sweaty bodies everywhere make it hard to get up the steps to the front door. The last time I went to a party, it wasn’t quite like this.

  It was only a few kids from school. This is far more spectacular than anything I could have envisioned. After fighting a sea of people, we see the door, which is currently being guarded by two of Chance’s frat brothers.

  They eye me up and down. One of them looks like a surfer: long, blond hair, blue eyes, tan skin. He’s wearing a button down shirt rolled up to the elbows with a pair of jeans. “Who’s this, Leslie?” he looks over to her, humor in his eyes.

  “Hey, Grant. This is Natalee, my new roommate.” She smiles at him.

  Grant nods his head. “Cute. Well, you know your way around, Leslie. Have fun.” A sexy smile appears on his lips. Les rolls her eyes and links her arm through mine.

  “Alright, here’s the plan. We’ll do a quick walk through and I’ll introduce you to the other guys. Are you okay? You look like you are going to be sick.” Her brows furrow as she takes in my appearance.

  “I’m fine. Just been a while since I’ve been to a party,” I breathe out. I unlink my arm from hers so I can shake my hands out and let my mind relax. I can do this. I take a deep breath in. “I’m ready.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yup. This is what college is about, right? Partying, flirting, drinking, getting wild?”

  She smiles at me. “Yeah, but you forgot one thing.”

  “What’s that?”

  With a smile and a wink, she says, “You get to hook up with random guys.” I laugh despite the cold feeling in my chest making me want to run.

  Escape.

  Avoid.

  Bolt.

  Any male companionship.

  Leslie takes my hand and walks us to the kitchen area. I glance around, unable to make sense of the fact that this is a fraternity house. I expected gross couches and broken blinds, not a house straight out of one of those interior design magazines. Les grabs two red plastic cups and fills them with beer from the keg.

  “Don’t lose me, okay? It is really wild tonight. Usually, the parties aren’t this big.” All I can do is nod.

  “Leslie?” I hear before I see a guy come up behind her and swing her around. “Where have you been, girl? And, may I add, damn, you look sexy tonight.” She looks over to me and rolls her eyes before plastering a fake smile on her face. His glacier blue eyes roam over her body. I remember this guy. He was the one she practically ran from when he came into the café.

  “Hi, Chris. Do you know where Chance is?” She raises her voice a few octaves, sounding sickly sweet. She has to lean into him a bit because the music is loud and the bass is rattling, making it a bit hard to hear.

  “He’s up in his room getting ready.” His eyes flick to me. “I’m Chris, and you are?”

  “Natalee,” I say, loudly. He smirks at me and nods, licking his lips. I squirm, uncomfortable under his scrutiny. I step closer to Leslie.

  “How do you know Leslie?”

  “She’s my roommate,” Leslie answers for me.

  “Oh, this is her. Yeah, Chance mentioned her.”

  I look over to my right as a girl “accidentally” bumps into Leslie. Luckily, Leslie steps back before the beer can spill on her dress or shoes.

  “What the fuck?” Leslie’s eyes smolder with anger as she looks at the culprit.

  “Oh, I’m soooo sorry.” The girl snickers. “Maybe you should watch where you’re going, pinche skonka.” She smiles and sashays away. Her friends surround her as they laugh, making comments about Leslie being a dumb bitch in Spanish.

  Being friends with girls, especially pretty ones, one has to remember they have haters. There is no escaping it. Try as we might, not all girls grow up. Some stay petty and pathetic well into adulthood.

  “What is her problem?” I exclaim.

  Chris sighs, closes his eyes, and excuses himself to get a towel or a mop to clean up the spill. My eyes stay glued to the group of girls laughing and glowering in our direction.

  “That dumb bitch is Lexi,” Leslie says with a scowl as her eyes follow the vile witch. “She wants Chance. Hates that he’s with me and at every turn, does shit to piss me off. I...I think he was messing with her, but…” she blows out a breath, “I can’t prove it, ya know? That’s why we fight. I can feel it in my bones that he is unfaithful, but I know he’s my future. Gah, I sound so emo. It’s just complicated.” Her eyes shimmer with unshed tears.

  Drama.

  Scandalous.

  Backstabbing.

  I feel like I’m in the middle of Degrassi. More like 90210 with all the crazy, heinous, rich bitches. Nice to your face, but behind your back, they do shit just because they can. Maybe I took too big of a step. I shouldn’t have come to a frat party. If this is how college is going to be, I’d rather be back at home, curled in my bed.

  Then, I see Dad’s face in my mind—his eyes downcast and somber, his shoulders hunched in defeat. The option of dropping out and going home is not a choice. I just pray to the universe unnecessary drama doesn’t suck me in. All people have problems, I just have to understand we all deal with them differently. Fuck, I hope this doesn’t end with us sitting in a candle lit room letting out our feels.

  “Sorry.” Leslie blows out a deep breath. “I don’t want you to get a bad impression of Chance and I. The situation is just...hard. Anyway, that’s for another time. We are here to have a good time, so let’s go shake it off.” Les extends her hand, taking mine after I nod at her.

  We move toward the backyard where the DJ is. The slider opens up to a stone porch. We walk to the makeshift dance floor, shimmying our way to the center of the sweaty bodies.

  I shut my eyes as my body absorbs the bass.

  My hips sway to the drum’s rhythm.

  Thoughts erase.

  Body loosens.

  Music has always been the one thing that helps me. Music was where I found my solace. A song could tear me down, but another would build me right back up. The words and beats have a way of intertwining with my soul—cracking me open and letting me shed the sadness and grief, if only for a few moments. As we dance around each other, I laugh, beginning to enjoy myself.

  I forget about the secrets plaguing me.

  About her,

  About him,

  About them.

 
These moments are few and far between.

  The energy pulsing and humming through my veins entrances me. Leslie and I have been dancing on and off. Chance and Chris joined in, but I quickly made an excuse to get off the dance floor. I grab a water bottle from an ice chest and put it on the back of my sweaty neck. I sit for a few minutes before rejoining Leslie. I look around, but don’t see Chris or Chance. I don’t concern herself with it and let the thump of the bass sweep me away.

  “I can’t believe you, Chance. I am so done with your shit!” Leslie yelling instantly snaps me out of the musical trance.

  Leslie stomps off toward the house. Walking fast, I try hard to catch up, but her boyfriend beats me to her.

  “Baby, please stop. I wasn’t doing anything. I just took a body shot off her, no big deal,” he pleads, grabbing her arm to get her attention.

  Leslie shrugs out of his hold. “Really, no big deal? Well, then, let me go take a body shot off Harrison and see how you like it.” His face goes rigid.

  “What the fuck, Leslie?” he explodes, continuing through clenched teeth. “Why would you even say that motherfucker’s name?” He steps closer to her. “Do you still talk to him? Is that why he decided to come to college here, because he knew you would take his sorry ass back? Huh? Answer me, Leslie.” His voice steadily rises.

  Fear.

  Unease.

  Concern.

  Looking over, I see Chris.

  Hero?

  Savior?

  Maybe not, but he’s my only hope. With the crowd quickly growing around them, anxiety unfurls.

  “Can you please stop this? It’s out of hand.”

  I turn to him, pleading with my words.

  Smirking, he shrugs. My eyes search his.

  “Please,” I whisper, hoping he’ll have mercy.

  He locks his thick arms over his chest.

  “It’s Saturday night,” he cocks his stupid eyebrow at me, “a typical night for these two.”

  Rage.

  Disgrace.

  Resentment.

  I try again, begging the universe to give this ass some compassion. “Please, Chris, it’s really not funny,” I plead.