by Pamela Ann
“They’re going to milk every publicity exposure they can get. Tacky but smart.”
“Have you been eating the food delivery I’ve scheduled for you?” Before I left, I made sure to have a food delivery send him meals on a daily basis, not wanting him living off of pizza and whatever junk he liked to feed himself with these days. I was a diehard junk food fan, but consuming it daily wouldn’t do any good for anyone’s heart. He needed to be on top of his game.
“Yes … Well, the ones I can. Sometimes the guys eat off, too. We’ve been holed up in the studio just to get everything done in time.” He paused. “Don’t give me that look. I’m grateful for all you’re doing for me, petal. I really am. But sometimes, I like to eat a huge, fatty slab of steak after a long sweaty workout at the gym.”
“I’m here to support you through fatness and in health.” I giggled as I slipped a piece of salmon into my mouth.
“Oh yeah?” He laughed before taking his phone out. “I have a few songs I want you to listen to. Would you mind?” Those dark puppy eyes were on me, waiting expectantly.
“Let’s listen away. I can’t wait.” When it came to music, his music, I’d trade whatever just to hear him sing. It was one of my weaknesses, and proud of it, too.
While I gobbled my dinner down, River busied himself with his new beats. Most of the lyrics referred to our old relationship: the downfall, the one of a kind love, and finding oneself during a storm. I loved his music; it had great depth, had a story that I could readily feel the pain through his lyrics. It spoke from his heart, it spoke the truth, and to me, that was what music was all about—being able to reach into the masses through experiences and struggles that we all bravely faced at one point or the other.
“What’d you think?”
My heart ached and soared with insurmountable pride. “I love it. And that’s not because I love you and all that, but I applaud how you’ve taken your craft, your ability to another level. It a reminiscent of Jeff Buckley and Ed Sheeran put together. I love that old meets new vibe.”
He blew out a breath as if he had been holding it in until he heard my feedback. “Good, I’m just hella nervous. What if they don’t like it? I wouldn’t know what to do. I’ve given everything into making this record. The other day, I read an article about me and how I might be contributing into oversaturated pop market. And that my music might just be mediocre and some shit.”
I took his hand and gave it an encouraging squeeze. “Whether they like it or not, all that matters is you did it your way. You’ve given your all, and at the end of the day, that’s all that matters. Seriously, you’re amazing. Don’t beat yourself up over someone’s delusions and opinions. If every artist listens to all the haters out there, do you think there’d be any artists left? We have to grow thick skin and carry on. Life’s a dance; you gotta cha-cha your way around it.”
“You’re right. I don’t know why, but that stupid article struck me. I shouldn’t be reading garbage like that, not when I’m in the middle of finishing everything.” He placed his hands behind his head before stretching his neck, stressed beyond measure.
“You look like you need a hug,” I murmured before getting up from my chair and circling around so I could sit on his lap.
River was bombarded with your typical nerves and doubts. Similarly, I was overcome with the same stressors when I auditioned.
Circling my arms around his neck, I held him, loving the feel of having of his warmth and his familiar smell.
He perked up. “I need more than a hug. I didn’t fly all the way out here just for a hug.”
“A hug is a good start.” I snickered as I kissed the tip of his nose. “I’ve missed your psycho.” To this very day, staring into his gorgeous face still made my heart constrict as if it was the first time. “Before you leave, can you please leave me this sweater so I can smell you whenever I want?”
“Anything you want, petal.”
“Thanks for coming. I think we both needed this.” Five days away, and we were both dying from the separation.
He caressed my face as he stared into my eyes. “I’m proud of you, Cara.”
Frowning, I awkwardly smiled before asking, “For what?”
He thoughtfully gazed at me. “Coming out here, doing what you love, and just being your crazy stubborn self.”
He was being cute, and I just loved all the extra attention he was showering me.
“Acting’s the other love of my life. I have to follow my heart, or I won’t be able to live with myself.”
“I suppose I’m the other love of your life?” His brow rose, teasing me.
“Absolutely.” I beamed before I breathed him in, moaning as warm satisfaction spread through me. His smell never failed to turn me on. It was just so damn sexy. “How long are you here for?” I asked as I dove in for another dose of his scent. Heaven, this was pure unadulterated heaven.
“I gotta jet out after lunch tomorrow. I’d love to stay longer, but my schedule’s pretty tight, too, petal.”
For him to come out here, knowing his schedule was beyond mental, I was grateful. “I know. You have no idea how much this means to me. Thank you, babe.”
“I do what I can when I can,” River stated as he began to stroke my thighs, his mind already drifting towards his carnal intentions.
“You’re the best.”
“And don’t you forget it.”
He let me finish my meal before we drank the rest of the bottle and spent much of our time catching up on what had been going on his end. I was scheduled to work at eight the following morning, and I had to call in to see if I could move it to the afternoon. Most actors had a lot of requests, and this was the first time I had asked for one, so I hoped I hadn’t caused much ruckus. There was no mistaking how much I loved my job, but I needed to be with River.
We had sex once, and then I was too exhausted to even open my eyes. River, on the other hand, carried on as he wished. I fell asleep with him going for round two. I had no idea how long he took, but knowing his stamina, he probably stopped about three or four. Many people would have been bothered by this, but I wasn’t one of them. Why begrudge him of sex when he desperately needed to release stress and tension? Besides, he was my heart. What’s not to love?
We woke up a little after eight in the morning. It took another hour to roll out of bed before we ordered breakfast. Pancakes, hefty strips of bacon, eggs, waffles, a bowl of mixed berries with a side of crème fraîche, fresh pressed orange juice, and a pot of hot brewed French press.
While I waited for him to come out of the bathroom to freshen up, I took it upon myself to pour him a cup of coffee and half a glass of juice. After last night’s activities, I was beyond famished. One could only imagine what his appetite would be. He was so intense last night, placing me at a brink of release, but wouldn’t let me orgasm. So the sex was a little rough while I fought for my own release. And when I got my way … well, I was ready to sleep like a baby.
River strode into the living room, donning his Calvin’s, a look he sported whenever home, but it seemed he didn’t mind doing the same thing at hotels. I watched him with half-hooded lids, getting aroused at the sight of his glorious abs, sculpted to absolute perfection.
“You’re definitely going to make it hard for me to forget you now, that’s for sure,” I purred like a horny kitty as I slowly sipped my coffee while roving over his exquisite body. “I thought for sure I had enough of you, but I guess this won’t be the first time I’ve got it all wrong.” My eyes dropped to his burgeoning bulge, and my sex tingled, imagining him between my thighs again.
“Eyes up here, woman.” He chuckled, directing me to look up to meet his lips. Our lips locked for a minute or so, giving me a phenomenal kiss, until he mustered enough will to pull away, gazing into my haze-filled eyes before whispering, “While you’re out here, I want you to think of something for me.”
That sounded ominous.
“Okay, go on …”
“You …” He
trailed off with seriousness before he bore those dark eyes on me, keeping me in place, “moving in with me.”
“Which house are we talking about here?” I licked my lips, undecided about his proposal.
He shrugged kissing my forehead. “Both of them. But since I have this this going on, it’ll be the Beverly Hills pad I’ll be using the most,” he casually stated before strolling towards the opposite side of the table and sitting across from me. His eyes beckoned for mine, but I couldn’t meet his gaze just yet. My mind was a whirl, and I wasn’t sure what to say next.
It was a brave move for him, for us, since we never really got the chance to live on our own before. Regardless, this entailed a major leap for me. Was I ready to take that on when we barely got back together? We weren’t even a few months in, for Pete’s sake. Then again, this gesture proved just how much he believed in us. Maybe, just maybe, if I could meet him halfway, somehow this could work out for the both of us.
“I don’t know … You have no idea how difficult it was for me to get my own place. I saved up every penny I had to get it.” He would never understand where I was coming from. The least I could hope was that he wouldn’t take it to heart if I declined.
“Cara, I know how hard this must be for you, but I just thought it’d be nice to come home to you again.” He pulled out a key, carefully placing in my hand. “Just think about it, okay?” Those dark depths trained on me, scrutinizing each expression I made.
“Will do.” I nodded, not sure what else to say.
His brows furrowed, appearing a little hurt from the stiffness of my reply. “Don’t look like I just gave you a death sentence, petal. It’s not supposed to be like that.”
With as much enthusiasm as I could muster, I threw him an encouraging look. “I promise to think about it, babe. We’ll never know, seven weeks is quite a long time. Maybe by then I’ll miss you so damn much that I won’t have a choice but to move in with you ’cause I can’t stand being away from you any longer.”
His eyes glinted, amused at the thought of me obsessed with him again. “I’d love for that to happen. Then you’ll just be as crazy as I am with you.”
“I am crazy for you.”
“You are … but not like before …” He trailed off with sadness in his eyes, recalling the memories of our past. “In those days, I was your endgame.”
He still was, but I wasn’t going to throw everything in one basket when we just started dating again. Surely, he could see that?
“Baby steps, River. I’ll get there, and you’re going to help me.”
“You bet your sweet ass I will. I’ll fucking carry you if I have to.”
Like I expected anything less from him.
We only had a couple of hours left before he was due to jet back to Los Angeles. And like always, we spent it in bed, talking and cuddling. So, when it was time for him to leave, we got stuck at the door, kissing and nipping each other’s neck, not ready to say goodbye.
I’m going to miss his crazy so bad. I heaved before kissing him on the lips once more. It’s time to let him go, or he’ll miss his flight…
“I’ll be seeing you,” I whispered, hating these temporary goodbyes.
He smiled against my lips and whispered, “Be seeing you.”
Chapter Three
After seven, long, rigorous weeks, I boarded a commercial flight home. Dressed in my typical all black gear from top to bottom and my haphazard hair loosely tied in a bun, I let out a satisfying sigh after hearing the sound of the buckle being secured around my hips. Never had I been so ecstatic when thinking of home. I had missed my friends and being surrounded with familiarity. Vancouver was a beautiful city, but there was nothing like LA. Love or hate it, the city had a way of growing in you.
River thought I wouldn’t be back for another two days. However, I took it upon myself to book the next flight out the second we wrapped up. The man had a crazy habit of surprising me all the time, and I wanted to repay the favor. Though there hadn’t been a day we didn’t speak over the phone, it wasn’t the same.
Beyond elated at the thought of seeing my River soon, happiness bubbled out of me the second the plane touched on the tarmac. It felt forever navigating through customs and through the carousel, but the moment I had everything with me, I wheeled myself out and immediately flagged one of the yellow cabs, heading straight to his condo in Beverly Hills.
I wasn’t sure if he was in the studio or at home, but knowing how crazy he had been before his album released, he would most likely be working late. However, since the man had gifted me a key to his pad, I could unwind until he was back.
It took less than half an hour to get to his place from the airport. And with the use of the key he left me, I wheeled myself into his apartment, and upon entering, I was bombarded with a delicious scent of food being cooked, wafting in the air.
My inside turned hot, then cold, as my eyes trained on the person coming down the stairs. A figure I wouldn’t dare forget. Never in a million years. My blood curled at the very sight of her.
Something violent exploded within me, and in a heartbeat, I was ready to settle scores.
“Willa,” I hissed out as I shoved my luggage against the wall before marching to meet her at the end of the steps, prepared to yank her by the hair and drag her out of here. “What the fuck are you doing here?” My heart pounded while my hand clenched. My mind ran each ugly scenario available as to why she was here. This was River’s home, for fuck’s sake!
But before Willa could manage to reach the bottom of the steps, River came out of the kitchen, donning a damn apron and heart-warming smile.
“Baby, you’re back early! I’m making dinner. Are you hungry?” He trudged towards my frozen form before wrapping those steel-banded arms around me and giving me a massive hug, planting a huge kiss on my lips.
What the flipping crock! Color me confused, but why wasn’t anyone explaining anything to me?
I frowned, my lips pursed as I accusingly gazed at the stony-faced Willa before my eyes reverted back to the grinning idiot of a boyfriend. “What the fuck is going on here? Care to fucking explain why this ho is here?”
“Listen, why don’t you sit down? I’ll pour you a glass of wine, then we can talk about it,” he offered softly, hoping alcohol would make my boiling blood lower down a notch.
Well, tough luck. I didn’t come here to play a vapid airhead.
“No, I don’t have the patience to wait that long. If you’re fucking around, you gotta spill now!” Hell hath no patience for a woman previously scorned. He should know better. My temper was about to explode like Mount Vesuvius, so he better rethink his strategy.
River’s dark eagle eyes flickered about my face, unperturbed from the flare of my temper. “You really think I’d do that to you?” he asked, affronted.
Damn him.
“Right now, after looking how domesticated you both are, I don’t fucking know!”
River gaped at me in pure disbelief. Then groaned before scratching the side of his stubble. He then led me towards the end of the foyer for some privacy and away from Willa’s hearing range.
“She called last week, begging for a job, and since I don’t know where to put her on my team, I hired her as my assistant and offered for her to stay here until she saved up enough money to get her own place.”
“You did what?” My insides shrunk, seething. He just didn’t invite Satan’s stepsister to live with us!
His frown deepened as he tried to console me. “I know, I know. I should’ve said something to you, but we both know you’ve had it in for her since the beginning of time, and I can’t turn my back on her. She’s family, too.”
“Are you insane? Have you forgotten the time when she tried to break us apart?” Family, she surely wasn’t! “Willa is a conniving snake. This is one of her ploys to get sympathy from you. You know it! And for her to live here? Fine, go ahead. Whatever I think or feel doesn’t seem important, anyway. So why don’t you guys go play family whi
le I head back to my apartment.” I was livid, my body shuddering from suppressed rage.
I was about to move when River reached out to hold my hands, as if trying to reassure me that everything was going be okay.
“Baby, please … Let’s give her a month, just a month to get her own place,” he implored, hoping to dismantle my resolve.
Willa was bad news. She and I never got on. Never. In all those years we were roommates, she never offered an olive branch. And each time I tried to bridge a friendship with her, she would become a spiteful brat. She loathed me from the beginning, and that hatred had never dithered. To this day, I believed she still harbored the same ill feelings towards me. Deep-rooted hatred like hers never went away.
How could this man not see my plight? Did he deem me unreasonable? Well, it sure seemed that way.
“Do what you have to do, River,” I said, resolute.
River held me down, not ready to yield. “Don’t leave. I want you here.” Lifting my chin to meet his gaze, he pleaded before softly brushing his lips on mine, connecting his forehead with my own, longing for me. “I’ve missed you,” he softly whispered against my lips.
The emotion in his voice slightly shook my resolve. Damn him. I missed him, too, but with Willa around? Fuck, that proved to be difficult. She made my passionate nature take a nosedive.
Torn between hate for that vile woman and the love of my life, I gripped River’s honed arm, loving the hardness of his muscle as I sought those beautiful depths I loved to get lost in. “Why, oh the fuck why, didn’t you say anything?” He knew better than to give me a surprise heart attack.
“I’m sorry, petal, but please don’t leave because you’re pissed. We’ll fix this, okay?” He grimaced, knowing he was at fault. “We’ll talk after dinner, but for now … I’ve made a feast. Let me feed you first.”
Eat? The last thing I wanted was to choke on anything. If at all, I wanted to shove the food in that horrible person’s throat.
“I don’t want to eat,” I petulantly stated. I was sure I sounded like an absolute drama queen, but this was grave. How could he not grasp how dire the situation was?