How to Kennel a Killer

by Cat Clayton

  Apparently, he’d paid her a visit.

  I dug my cell phone out of the pocket of my olive green blazer.

  I stood, swiped my phone open, and called 911. I gave the details of what I’d found to the female dispatcher. She told me to stay on the line until help arrived.

  “Tell me what you see,” she said.

  I did as instructed.

  I gaped at poor Petunia and took in the surrounding scene. She wore a cherry red long-sleeved shirt under her denim overalls. Her blonde, crazy-curled hair was tied back in an adorable messy bun. One of her mud boots was still on, the other lay on its side a few feet from her body. Whimsical flying books adorned hot pink boots. The broken spigot poured water, the turn handle missing. An oversized denim shirt rested on one of the wooden handles of an old beat up wheelbarrow. I mentioned the scattered strawberries. A plastic coffee mug with a breast cancer awareness pink bow sat perched on a large mound of mulch.

  I relayed everything I saw.

  “I can’t believe this is happening. Do you think maybe she had a heart attack or something?” I asked.

  My knees buckled.

  Chiquita, maybe you ought to sit down again.

  I kneeled on the wet ground, ignoring the mud.

  “Steely, I don’t know. The first squad car is almost there,” the dispatcher said. “Hold tight, darlin’.”

  “Okay.” I reached into my handbag and located my inhaler, shook it, and took a preventative puff. No need for my lungs to spaz out now.

  Cuff sniffed cautiously around the scene. I do not know, Chiquita, but it is sad. She was a well-loved woman around this town.

  So true, I thought.

  Sirens approached. Car doors slammed. I heard footfalls behind me.

  “Ms. Lamarr, it’s Officer Wyatt Danbury. I’m coming around the side of you. Stay right where you are, okay?”

  I nodded. “They’re here,” I said to the dispatcher.

  “We can hang up now. Everything will be okay, Steely,” she said.

  I disconnected the call. Nothing is okay about finding your friend dead, I thought.

  Nothing.

  Chapter 2

  The cavalry had arrived. Officer Danbury helped me to my feet. Movement swarmed around the scene. Voices came from everywhere, yet nowhere in particular.

  Cuff barked twice, breaking me out of my stupor.

  Chiquita, you okay?

  “I think so,” I said. My arms and legs felt leaden and my head spun. I took a step back.

  “Don’t go anywhere, Ms. Lamarr,” one officer said curtly. “We’ll need to ask you a few questions soon.”

  “I’m not leaving. But I’d like to sit down if that’s okay with you. I’m feeling dizzy,” I said, glancing around the area. I pointed to a wooden bench near the vegetable patch. “Can I wait over there?”

  The officer nodded. “Someone will be with you shortly.”

  I made my way to the bench. Cuff followed, rambling inside my head.

  I hope they do not think you had anything to do with Petunia dying.

  We will have to come up with a plan if so.

  Why does this always happen to you?

  I melted onto the bench. “What do you mean this always happens to me?”

  To find dead bodies.

  “I’ve only found two,” I said, watching the swarm of officers working.

  That is more than most people find in their entire lifetime.

  He made a valid point.

  Jackson, Officer Tripp, and their lieutenant strode through the mucky yard. Lieutenant Nick Campbell was my ex-boyfriend who’d cheated and kicked me out of his house back in July. I had no use for the jerk.

  Jackson and I made eye contact, his expression unreadable. A rush of emotions stirred. Am I in trouble? Is he angry I’m here and somehow involved? Is he worried?

  You are making all kinds of assumptions, Chiquita.

  I know, I thought. I couldn’t help myself.

  Jackson spoke briefly with Officer Danbury and headed in my direction. My heart thudded inside my chest and my toes tingled inside my boots. His dark eyes never left mine as he approached the bench.

  “Hi,” I said.

  Hello, my friend.

  But he couldn’t hear Cuff’s thoughts. He stopped a few feet from the bench, all his attention honed in on me.

  “You all right?”

  I wanted to jump up and throw myself into his arms, but I knew better. He was in uniform and on the job, and I’m certain the other officers wouldn’t appreciate my public display of affection. I didn’t care what they thought, but I respected Jackson and his duties as a police officer.

  “I’m fine,” I said. “Well, not fine exactly. But as well as I can be for discovering Petunia dead.”

  He stared down at me. His rugged, chiseled face remained stone cold, but his eyes spoke sympathy. He shoved his hands in the front pockets of his trousers.

  “Danbury says you found her,” he said.

  I nodded.

  “Can I ask why you were here,” he said in a calm, cool voice.

  Surely Officer Danbury didn’t think I had anything to do with this?

  “Is he accusing me of something?” I asked. Sometimes my mouth worked speedier than my brain.

  “Whoa. Nobody is accusing you of anything. But Danbury says you were near Ms. Jinks when he arrived. Since you were the only one here with her, we need an official statement. Now, calm down.”

  I sighed and ran a hand through my red tufts of hair. Tears threatened to fall. “Sorry. I’m kinda freaking out.”

  Do what the good officer says, Chiquita. Relax. Breathe.

  I took a few deep breaths. Thankfully, my asthma behaved.

  He took a step closer, peering down at me. “I understand, Steely. It’s to be expected.”

  And just like that, my nerves settled some. Jackson’s ability to understand me was one thing I adored about him.

  “Will it be you who takes my statement?”

  He shook his head. “No. Not me.” He glanced back toward the group of officers.

  The Justice of the Peace, Judge Pieper, arrived on the scene. Since Wallerton County didn’t have a medical examiner, he’d be the one to pronounce Petunia dead so they could take her body for examination. They would transport her body to Austin for an autopsy if no obvious signs of death were visible.

  “Why can’t you question me?”

  Jackson turned back to face me, his expression pained. “Do you really have to ask?”

  “No,” I said, blushing. “I wanted to hear you say it.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “Look woman, I’m trying like hell to keep myself held together in a professional manner. All I really want to do right now is pick you up and carry you out of here, get you home, make you dinner, and kiss those pouting lips until they’re smiling.”

  Be still my beating heart. If I’d been standing, my legs would’ve given out. I would’ve melted into a puddle right here on the spot.

  Oh, Chiquita. I think I am blushing and I am not sure that is possible.

  Jackson’s face twitched, and I saw the hint of a smile.

  “Um... wwwhat?” I stuttered.

  The cat has your tongue.

  Or something like that, I thought.

  “Was I not clear, Steely? You seem somewhat bewildered,” Jackson said, fighting a full-out grin.

  I bit my lower lip. “No, uh, I understand completely,” I said. “Home. Dinner. And...”

  He nodded. “And kissing. Lots of kissing,” he added in a low, throaty whisper.

  My breath hitched in my chest and these little sparkly things dotted my peripheral vision. “Well, okay then. I’ll wait right here for someone to take my statement,” I said.

  He winked. “Hang in there. You’re doing great.”

  He turned to go back toward the other officers. I watched as he sauntered off. I wondered if I’d ever tire of seeing how well he filled out his uniform.

  I know what you mean, Chi
quita. When I look at Taffy, I see stars. Cuff curled up on the bench beside me. I am taking a snooze while we wait.

  “You go right ahead,” I told him and patted his tiny head.

  I pulled out my cell phone and sent Daniel a quick text, telling him and Gertie I’d had a delay and I’d explain when I returned. I couldn’t tell them the horrible news over a text message. He replied with a thumbs up emoji. As I tucked my phone in my coat pocket, a shrieking voice came from around the side of the library.

  “Where is she?”

  I didn’t believe this day could get any worse. I was wrong.

  Vivienne Peacock. Town socialite and busy-body. Mrs. Peacock, at the library, with a book, barreled around the corner, her purse swinging. Judge and jury in a flowy black dress. The woman didn’t keep her dislike for me a secret. After I’d verbally attacked her niece for sleeping with my ex-boyfriend a few months ago, and then cat-slapped said ex-boyfriend, the woman had made it her mission to try to ruin me and my dog grooming business.

  I recalled Petunia’s phone call earlier about Vivienne and how she came over here and raised a stink about Petunia and Patches entering the costume contest.

  “Tell me it’s not true!” She strode across the yard, wearing an explosive expression.

  Uh oh, Chiquita. Look out. Here comes lady loco. Cuff sat up on his haunches.

  She stopped and stared over at Petunia’s body, her palm fluttered to her chest. “My heavens. Poor Petunia.”

  I pinched my lips shut. Poor Petunia, my butt. Daniel told me last week he’d overheard Vivienne hounding a couple of city officials about getting rid of Petunia and giving her the librarian position.

  “Aunt Vivi. You shouldn’t be back here,” Nick said, approaching us.

  Aunt Vivi?

  Macho idiot alert. Cuff’s thought touched my funny bone. I stifled a giggle.

  Vivienne jumped sideways, dropping a sheet of paper to the ground.

  I stooped and picked it up. The petition to keep Petunia and Patches out of the contest. What nerve!

  “Oh, Nick dear! You startled me,” she cooed at him. “Well, I came to return a book when I saw all the commotion. I heard Steely Lamarr was back here.” She turned to me. “This has your name written all over it!” Her lips stretched into a thin line. Then, she whirled around and gave Nick an innocent smile. “You know, Nick darling, what a bad temper Steely has. I want to make an official statement!”

  “Oh, for Pete’s sake, lady!” I shoved the petition in her face. “You’re the one who was trying to get Petunia kicked out of the contest. If anyone has their name all over this, I’d say it’s you.”

  “All right, you two,” Nick intervened. “Aunt Vivienne. Let someone take your statement. I need to question Ms. Lamarr,” he said, motioning to Brandon Tripp. “Officer Tripp, will you please take Mrs. Peacock’s statement.”

  Brandon nodded at me before he replied. “Yes, Lieutenant.”

  “Watch out for her, Nick dear. Remember, she’s struck you before,” Mrs. Peacock said as she walked away, arm in arm with Brandon.

  “You deserved it,” I said. I didn’t deny I could lose control when pushed too far. Nick’s left cheek attested to it.

  Cuff growled and curled up on my lap. I will protect you.

  Nick scowled. “Anyway.” He flipped open his black memo pad. “Your story. Please.”

  “You cheated. Dumped me. The end.” I couldn’t resist.

  The look. Narrowed eyes, disapproving frown, and ticking jaw. I despised the look.

  “Can I have that, please?” He pointed to the petition I held. I handed it to him. After a moment of scanning the paper, he cleared his throat. “Why are you here?”

  “Why do you think I’m here?”

  If you answer his questions, Chiquita, he will leave you alone.

  “You’re so smart,” I told Cuff.

  Chiquita, you said that out loud. Shh...

  Oops.

  “I’m so smart? Steely, you’re not making this any easier. There’s a huge crowd in front of the library. I have three men out there holding them back. Apparently, one of the folks who had been waiting for the library to open followed you back here. She saw you leaning over Petunia. They’re looking for someone to blame.”

  “I didn’t kill her.”

  “I never said you killed her. But I need some information from you since you were the first one on the scene. Can you work with me for a few minutes, please?” Nick asked.

  I saw Officer Blonde Bimbo, I mean Stacia Peacock, trying to calm her aunt down while Brandon took Vivienne’s statement.

  “Fine. I came to the library to check on Petunia, to see if she was okay. Also, several of our customers have expressed concern because Petunia won the past several years. They were refusing to sign up if Petunia entered Patches. I thought if I could convince her to judge the competition, it’d make everyone happy.” My butt started falling asleep, so I shifted on the bench.

  “Wait, slow down. Competition? Do you mean Scrubadub’s costume contest?”

  “Yes.” My pulse ticked up.

  “Okay. Go back to the part about checking on her. What made you think something was wrong?”

  “She’d called me earlier and didn’t sound well. Her breathing was labored, and I became worried. I tried calling her back, but she didn’t answer. I ran over and look in on her.”

  He jotted a few notes in his book. “What did you see when you arrived?” His voice was clear and concise.

  “Well, for starters, I found the front of the library flooded. The front doors were locked, lights were off inside, and a few people were waiting out front. Being in a hurry to get back to the shop, I walked around back to find Petunia. I found her crumpled up on the ground, and the... the water pipe broken.”

  I glanced over at the broken water valve. Someone had shut off the water. My eyes drifted over to a team of people working near Petunia’s body.

  Guilt hit me. I should’ve run over here as soon as I didn’t get an answer on the phone. How much time had I wasted chatting with clients before leaving? Thirty minutes? A wave of nausea crashed against my ribcage. I wrapped an arm around my stomach, took a deep breath, and steadied myself before I lost it.

  The card, Chiquita. The one in your purse. Remember?

  “Oh, here,” I said, digging the card out. “I found this next to Petunia.” I handed it to Nick. “Maybe she called Buzz to come fix the pipe. And those strawberries on the ground are from Donny Thomas's bike garden. I know because I bought some this morning. Maybe he—”

  “Do me a favor and leave the detective work to us, Steely. Did you see anything or anyone else?” he asked, tucking the business card inside his notebook.

  He’d always been good at cutting me off and making me feel as insignificant as a flea.

  I thought back to when I’d first arrived and shook my head. “No, except for the broken water pipe and Petunia, I’d say those were the only two things I noticed out of the ordinary.” I thought back to her strange phone call. “Wait, something else. Petunia called and told me Vivienne had paid her a visit and thrown a fit about her and Patches always winning the contest. Vivienne tried to get Petunia to back out of entering. Even had that stupid petition signed.”

  “I will inform Officer Tripp,” Nick said.

  I studied Vivienne Peacock, her arms flailing about, her mouth running ninety miles an hour. I nodded my head in her direction.

  “And you might also want to question dear Aunt Vivi about gunning for the librarian position.” I had heard nothing about Petunia leaving, but now with her out of the way, I’m guessing the job was free for the taking.

  “You’re jumping to conclusions.” His dark eyebrows furrowed. “I appreciate the tips. Please try to be accessible if we have any further questions. You’re free to leave.” He turned to go.

  “I know, I know. Don’t leave town,” I said under my breath.

  His head turned in my direction and his left eye twitched. As he strode
away, he said, “Not funny.”

  I am laughing on the inside, Chiquita.

  At this point, sarcasm trumped sadness.

  I considered our options on how to walk back to the shop. I could either face the mob out front, who’d have a ton of questions, or I could cut to the right of the potting shed and head around the back lot which led to Main Street. Choosing the latter, I tried skirting around the huddled group of people crouching over Petunia’s body.

  Lizzie Madden, Petunia’s good friend and jogging buddy, stood off to the side of the library alone. Her shoulders sagged as she quietly cried to herself. I waved, but she remained motionless, only blinking. Tears falling. Lost in her own grief.

  Jackson, kneeling alongside Chief Becker, nodded at me. I offered him a weary smile. You’ve got this, I told myself. Keep walking.

  As I ambled past the mulch-loaded wheelbarrow, I again noticed Petunia’s coffee mug sitting on top of the pile. The woman had loved coffee like I loved pie. I glanced back at Petunia. Poor thing. Pleasant Hills would miss her caffeinated spirit.

  “SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!” Daniel said, throwing his hands in the air. Soap bubbles floated to the floor. I explained what happened back at the library. “You’re kidding, right?”

  I shook my head.

  She is not joking, my friend. Cuff sat perched in a basket of dirty towels. His tiny head bounced back and forth between us.

  I plopped down on a stack of unpacked supply boxes. “I know. It’s awful.” I still couldn’t believe it myself.

  Gertie folded towels in the corner of the groom room. “How on earth did she die?”

  Still in a state of shock, I shrugged. “I don’t know. When I found her, all I could do was dial 911. Except for her one mud boot tossed to the side a few feet away, it looked as if she’d curled up and passed away. I didn’t see blood or anything. It appeared she’d been attempting to fix a broken water pipe when she...” my voice trailed off. My throat tightened and my eyes pricked with tears. I gripped the cardboard box beneath me, hoping to steady myself.