by S. Cook
His tone held deep warmth and I felt even guiltier for some reason. I couldn’t help the underlying feeling of relief I felt when the call ended. I stretched and as I smiled with enthusiasm for the new day, I knew it had nothing to do with Theo’s wakeup call.
I thought of the great time I’d had yesterday with Brian and of course Brandi too.
I got ready quickly while thinking about what options might lie open for more adventures. Just as I was putting finishing touches to my makeup, Brandi came knocking.
She looked around the room with obvious admiration, saying it was much different from hers though she liked her own room too. “I’m really glad I went for this resort; it lives up to its name. These small boutique locations always seem a lot more rewarding than those ‘all-inclusive’ spots. I’ll be truly sorry to leave. What’s on the agenda for today?”
I shrugged. “I’m thinking of finally trying out one of those boat excursions that leave from the marina. If I’m feeling more daring I could maybe rent a kayak, go paddling and just get the best out of that beautiful water. Or, I might feel like simply picking out one of those nice loungers on the beach and catch up on the latest bestseller.”
“Forget the book, Lydia,” said Brandi with a snort. “All that excursion stuff and kayaking sounds great, but shouldn’t we call Brian and ask him where he might think of showing us today? After all he obviously knows what’s available more than we could.”
I sighed, placing down my tube of mascara. “And what if he has work to do? He’s not here on a pleasure trip like we are. Brian has already gone above and beyond to make us enjoy our time here. I don’t think we should expect him to be at our beck and call.”
Brandi paused thoughtfully. “You’re right. But after breakfast, there’ll be no harm in keeping an eye out for him just in case, at least before we make up our minds about today.”
I still thought Brandi was being impractical with her insistence to seek Brian out. Yes, I would love to see him again and spend time around him but that wasn’t my privilege. Besides hadn’t I promised myself to work on getting things right in my head about everything that was happening in my life in terms of my relationship and future? I couldn’t stay focused if I kept letting Brian into the picture. He was confusing me enough as it was.
So why did I feel somewhat put out when we ended up catching no sign of him? We had breakfast and then tried his number, but it was unavailable. We even checked with the reception desk which was manned by other employees I didn’t recognize. They couldn’t say where Brian had gone, only that he wasn’t available. I would have been happy even to see Jem but she was absent as well.
“I’m sure he’s off on something to do with the resort. I told you he would be busy,” I said as we headed outside to join the trolleybus that would take us around the intended stops which included the shops and then the beach.
Brandi sighed with disappointment. “Well. I guess it’s just you and me.” She linked arms with me and we had a slightly dejected air that seemed to follow us for the rest of the day of sightseeing and marine activities. But at least we had each other, as Brandi had pointed out.
By night time we found our way back up to our rooms to rest. Neither felt like going down for dinner so much later we ended up in Brandi’s room, ordering up a huge midnight feast while watching movie after movie. I was reluctant to crawl back to my room so I crashed with Brandi who was only too glad for the company.
The next two days went by with more resort activities or just simply relaxing. I made inroads into some of the books I had saved on my e-reader device that had been left unread in my library for months.
The day for Brandi’s departure was drawing close and both off us chose to enjoy dinner in one of the resort’s outdoor eateries overlooking the moonlit beach.
“Admit it, you miss Brian,” Brandi said suddenly, breaking into my faraway thoughts.
I hadn’t even realized I’d drifted away as we’d eaten in silence.
Now I looked up, startled. “What?”
“We haven’t seen him these past few days. And he has your number yet he doesn’t call,” Brandi went on. “Either he’s on some critical assignment, or he’s forgotten all about us.”
Brandi’s words pricked more than I would have believed. I shoved my food around in my plate with my fork.
“I told you, Brandi. Brian was never part of the package. He was just being nice. Taking us round and spending time with us. As a staff of the resort he wouldn’t think twice about giving us that bit of attention.”
“Perhaps,” Brandi agreed. “But I thought you guys were friends at least. He shouldn’t have vanished like that. Do you think he’s in some kind of fix?”
“I really don’t care,” I said, taking a hasty gulp of water. The food felt like cardboard in my throat all of a sudden. “Look, he’s just someone I ran into here. Big deal.”
“You keep saying that like you want to believe it. To convince yourself he means nothing to you.” Brandi compelled me to meet her probing gaze. “I think he’s fantastic, Lydia. Not just because he’s good looking. But I can tell he’s a genuine person. But he hasn’t got eyes for me – it’s you he’s interested in. You need to stop acting like you don’t feel even a little something where he’s concerned.”
I finally lost my cool, my eyes flashing angrily at Brandi’s constant teasing. ‘What do you want me to say, Brandi? That I’ve gone and fallen for some near-stranger I’ve only known a few days? And while I’m supposedly engaged to someone else? If that’s what you want to hear, then it’s true. I’m feeling...things I’m not meant to feel. But they refuse to go away and it’s like I’m dying inside because I can’t understand what the hell’s happening to me.” On the last few words my voice caught in a sob and I covered my mouth suddenly with my hand.
Brandi stared at me for a moment before pulling my wrist down and gripping my fingers. “The first step is admitting it. At least now I know you’re flesh and bone.” She smiled gently. “And it’s okay to feel that way about him. If I thought I stood a chance I’d be all up on that myself, as you well know. But it’s with you he has that undeniable harmony; I felt it vibrating around you both all through the times we spent together. It had such energy and you can’t simply wish it away. Much as I long to find what you both have, I’m glad to be leaving tomorrow knowing I haven’t lost all my girlish weaknesses. I still get crushes, thank goodness. There’s still hope for my humanity.” She made a comic face and I couldn’t help choking out a laugh.
Then I sighed. “Maybe I’ll leave too. I’ve still got barely a week of vacation to spend but it wouldn’t be the same. Not without you and certainly not with Brian’s baffling absence.” I chewed on my bottom lip musingly. “I didn’t think it would be so easy for me to fall so hard. I didn’t even see it coming till it’s become like a taste in my mouth, coloring my senses. You were right; I can’t expect it to simply be wished away.”
“What about your engagement to Theo?” Brandi asked gently.
I hesitated, wondering how much I could confide in her without seeming like I’d been leaving too much to circumstances all this while. But then my gaze met Brandi’s and my mind told me that somehow, my friend would understand.
“You know the score, Brandi. Two influential families pushing their son and daughter together, bent on a marriage of convenience for all concerned. I’m ashamed to say I went with it so easily. I felt too satisfied with keeping the status quo. What was the point in rocking the boat, right? My life, all mapped out for me. But I know better now. Theo’s a great guy but he’s not for me. Now that I’ve discovered my capacity to feel something more, I’m going to give it life and find where it’ll take me. And that is far from getting stuck in an arrangement that’ll suit everyone else but me.”
Brandi applauded lightly, a pleased smile on her face. “Now that’s the Lydia I want to see come out,” was her warm response, and then her eyes misted over more than a little as she squeezed on my fingers. “I�
�ll miss you when I get back to London. I really will. Let’s not lose touch like before, okay?”
I nodded immediately, feeling teary myself. Then we burst out laughing happily, the sound carrying across over the moonlight-swept beach.
***
With Brandi gone I was tempted every moment to simply throw my things together and leave on the next available flight home. But something always held me back. When I received my customary call from Theo a day after Brandi’s departure, I was tempted to break the news about my decision. I finally decided I owed it to him to tell him face to face.
I was returning to the hotel after a stroll round the scenic walking path through the resort, and went to get my key from the desk, the pretty receptionist’s words made me pause.
“Ms. Thorpe? You have a note here from Brian.”
My heart instantly lurched and my smile brightened. I managed to compose myself as I took the folded note and thanked the friendly brunette.
“He was in today?” I couldn’t help asking.
“Yes, just briefly. I told him you asked for him,” was her helpful reply.
“Thank you,” I said, smiling with a grateful nod.
I moved sedately to the elevator but once she was out of sight I peeled open the sheet of paper. I recognized Brian’s well-formed writing and for no reason my core melted. I read eagerly.
“I’m sorry I disappeared like that. A family emergency came up,” Brian wrote. “I’ll check on you this evening by eight. Can’t wait to see you. Brian.”
Brief as the note was it did impossible things to my mood. It felt like I floated around my room, my lips pressing to the note more than once, making me blush at my silliness.
Was this what falling in love felt like?
Feeling foolish and yet crazy happy at the same time? It was a good feeling. I liked it. I read the words over and over and each time I felt a coil tighten more and more in my belly. I fell back against my pillows and didn’t bother wondering at my besotted attitude. If only Brandi could see me now I thought with a sudden burst of mirth.
The hours seemed to stretch forever until eight o’clock. At last, there came a knock on my door and I forgot all about how long I’d waited. I dived to answer it and felt immeasurably happy to find Brian standing there. I noticed in a flash that he seemed drawn and somewhat paler than normal. But none of that diminished from his boyish, gorgeous smile when I practically jumped into his arms, almost toppling us both.
“Whoa!” he chuckled as he steadied me, his hands resting warmly on my waist. “Glad to see you must have missed me.”
“Come in, come in!” I said and pulled him back inside with me, closing the door. I turned to him with worried eyes. “Obviously I got the note, Brian. You said something about a family emergency?”
He sighed. “Yeah, my Dad. He had a heart attack. But he’s okay now,” he added hurriedly when I gasped in dismay. “He knows he needs to take things easy from now on.”
I sat heavily on the bed, my hand tugging him to sit next to me as if I couldn’t bear to be apart from him.
“Thank God he’s alright,” I breathed. “When I saw your message, I wasn’t sure what to think.”
Brian cupped my face gently and turned it to his. My breathing hitched and I was struck by the overwhelming sense of moisture suddenly seeping between my thighs. He smiled, which launched an intense throbbing in my secret place. I had to blink rapidly and force oxygen into my lungs just so I wouldn’t miss his next words.
“There’s so much I wanted to say in that note,” he said huskily, “But I decided it could wait until I was looking in your beautiful eyes. The last few days have been insane, Lydia but the one thing that kept me on track was the thought of you.”
I lowered my lashes shyly beneath the searing heat of his gaze. “I...I thought about you too.”
“Couldn’t be as much as the way I thought about you,” he said grinning, before lifting my palm to his lips and turning his face into the scented skin, inhaling deeply.
The mere sensuousness of his light caress made me shiver deep inside.
“I couldn’t get any rest, with you on my mind until late. I was worried you’d be gone before I got back and had the chance to talk.”
I let out a soft laugh. “I almost did leave. But I just couldn’t,” I confessed. “I don’t know how you did what you did to me. I almost feel like I must have been bewitched. There’s this hold you have on everything I do. I used to think I knew exactly what I wanted from life. Now all I want is for us to get carried away. Let’s not even think about it first. All that matters is that it feels real.”
“Yes. So real,” Brian said on a half groan as his head lowered and he kissed along my neckline, making me gasp. His body pressed up against mine and I was caught off guard, falling back in bed as his welcome weight pushed on me. I instinctively wrapped my arms around his neck, unable to hide the melting seduction from my gaze as I looked up at him.
“Just being this close to you,” Brian began, then shook his head as if to ward off pain. “I can’t wait for you to find out everything about me, Lydia. And I want to learn everything about you. What makes you happy.”
“Right now, it’s simply to have this, with you. Your body on mine, your strong arms surrounding me,” I whispered. “You want me, don’t you Brian?”
I bit hard on my bottom lip, my last trace of fear quickly dissipating when Brian seized my mouth in a kiss and let his lips do the talking.
He placed his hand on my stomach, the touch gentle yet firm against my shirt, keeping me in place when I would have straightened up. I felt suddenly nervous with Brian looking at me like that, with an almost feral heat. My nipples hardened against the pads of my bra at the sensation of his fingertips brushing my skin as he began to slowly unbutton my shirt.
He leaned closer, kissed the swell of my cleavage. I was submerged in his deep blue eyes that had always seemed so filled with calm, yet now had grown dark, fierce. He wanted me strongly and I could feel his desire like a beating drum in my chest. I could smell the stimulating aroma of his unique scent blended in with his aftershave and it made me feel even more overpowered by him.
It felt like he knew exactly how to touch me. I held his gaze pleadingly, not sure what I was even begging for.
Brian paused and looked deep in my eyes. “You want me to stop?”
Christ, no. It should have been strange having another man touch me after so many months dating Theo, but it didn’t. My only concern was how every little thing about him affected me so much, even just the feathering of his breath along my earlobe.
“Don’t stop. Please,” I finally answered, and his eyes blazed almost tempestuously black.
In contrast, his touch was light as he stroked up the side of my breasts, skimming over the patterned lace. He cupped me and squeezed gently, bringing every nerve cell I had to life. I gasped out loud, back arching. His unbearably soft fondling had more impact than any rough, ravenous passion could have done.
Whatever storm raged in the air around us, Brian seemed to want me to know that he was in full control, that I could trust him to take utmost care with me.
Brian’s mouth came hot on mine, a melting kiss.
My breath quickened up again just as I felt Brian open up my folds, exposing my clit. His fingertips brushed the eager bud and I almost jumped. Oh God. Rushes of pleasure coursed through my whole pelvis, jarring my hips forward.
“You want more?”
“Yes,” I said, not really knowing what more lay in store. All I felt certain of was I’d love anything he’d do to her.
That was when I saw him slide down between my legs. Barely able to breathe I closed my eyes, which only enhanced the sensation of the warm tip of Brian’s tongue gliding into my entrance.
That first gentle lap almost had my mind shutting down from ecstasy. A few more gentle strokes of his tongue, all around, and I cried out his name. A deep groan sounded from the back of his throat in response, and it was enough to
send my hips convulsing. His hands clamped down on them firmly, holding them apart.
Exposed and desperately aroused, I couldn’t hold back a sob. I heard his rumbling voice telling me how intoxicating I tasted, just as sweet as he’d imagined. I shuddered, my eyes peeling open and looking down. Brian’s eyes were fixed on my face which brought the heat up my neck to my temple, while his lips on my sex made the heat swell in my lower regions.
His large hands reached up to play with my breasts and I covered my hands over his, my hips thrusting urgently beneath his eating mouth.
“Oooooh.” A long moan tumbled from my lips. “Oh my God!”
I trembled beneath him, my legs opening wider. His tongue was so powerful, so warm as it pushed in and out of me. I was bathed in juices and he made me stream with even more speed and magnitude. When he suddenly shifted upwards to suck on my jutting clit, I unraveled in a mass of tremulous shrieks.
“Brian.”
As he toyed with my clit, his hands firmly stroked my breasts, pulling and twisting my nipples. Shards of sensation slashed me right to my tissues. My nipples hardened and began to ache with pleasure from his relentless manipulations. I fought the feeling that I was losing control but it was a futile battle.
Brian rolled my nipples around between his thumb and index finger, rubbing on them while watching my face intently for every swath of expression that crossed my features. Knowing he seemed to love watching me go wild from his devastating touch made me feel more wanton, more frantic with passion.
He played his tongue back and forth, back and forth over my clit and the bundle of nerves that comprised my pussy. One hand left my breasts, to join his teasing tongue at my core. His fingers stroked the damp, exposed slit, then played with the swollen outer lips.
I let a guttural moan escape my panting lips, the pleasure much too intense. My head was thrown back and a scream of bliss escaped me when Brian pushed one finger inside me.