My Heart Will Find Yours

by Linda LaRoque

  “Over it, you’ll wear this black wool cape as the weather will be cold. Your train is delayed, so you won’t arrive until after sunset.”

  Texanna asked many questions, but all Garth and Lucia could tell her was what she’d be wearing, approximately what time her train would arrive, and the date, December 18, 1880.

  “Trust your instincts, child. All will be well.”

  That was easy for her to say. She wasn’t the one traveling back in time. But Texanna knew worry wouldn’t change a thing.

  Texanna twisted the gold band on her finger. She wondered if Royce had picked his ring up at the jewelers. Would he like the inscription she’d had engraved inside? For the ninety-ninth time, she wondered what it would be like when they were reunited. Heaven, it would be like heaven. Unexpectedly, anxiety made her gasp, and she had difficulty breathing. What if he’d found someone else while she was gone? She shook herself trying to ward off her fear. He had the locket. Had he lost hope, or did he believe she would somehow locate it and return to him? Was he waiting for her? It had been almost four months. Oh, God. Please help me to have faith.

  At the station, Texanna hugged Garth and Lucia goodbye.

  Lucia, with tears in her eyes, laid Pearl’s locket in Texanna’s hand. She held it tightly in her fist.

  “Take care, child. Live and love hard. The locket will come back to us, and we’ll see the next generation takes care of it.”

  “Thank you, Lucia. I love you.”

  The older woman’s eyes twinkled with mischief as she winked. “I love you, too, Grammy.”

  ****

  Texanna’s heart beat a mile a minute. She was finally going home—back to Royce and Garrett. Dressed in her 1880’s finery she felt like a fool, but she’d have boarded the train buck naked if necessary to get back to Royce. The dress fit her like a glove but wasn’t too confining, and she didn’t have on a corset. Black high-top shoes peeped out from under her dress. She’d used a buttonhook to fasten them so they were tight. They pinched a little but weren’t bad. At least they were warm.

  Her carpetbag sat on the seat beside her. Inside were the sheets she’d been wrapped in when Royce brought her forward to the present. Royce had also added her jeans, tank top, and her tennis shoes. Her underwear was glaringly absent. The thought of Royce purposely keeping the pink bra and panties pleased her. She reached up to make sure the locket was securely in place around her neck. Royce had finally admitted he loved her skimpy ‘unmentionables’ as he called them. As a surprise, she’d bought and was wearing a pale blue set. If he thought the pink set was sexy, she couldn’t wait to see what he thought about her thong.

  Grinning like a Cheshire cat, she closed her eyes and concentrated on her mission. Her nerves were stretched taut. She was so tired of waiting that she was ready to get out and start pushing the train down the tracks. Let’s get a move on, folks. Please, Lord. Let this work. Take me home.

  The speakers shrieked. “Sorry for the delay, folks. We’re ready to leave San Antonio. Shouldn’t be more than two hours late arriving in Waco.” Texanna felt the train give as it started moving and they slowly picked up speed. Two hours late. But Lucia told her to expect the delay. Her heart beat faster and she gulped in air. She was on her way.

  ****

  Royce smoothed the vest of his dark suit down his abdomen—the suit he’d worn when he and Texanna married. It fit looser today than it had then. Like Strawberry, he’d been off his feed, and it showed in the fit of his clothes. Actually, the gunshot wound had left him weak as a kitten. He’d lost weight, and regaining it and his strength was taking time. Time was something he had aplenty.

  He looked at his reflection in the full-length mirror in the corner. The suit didn’t look bad. In a month, it’d probably fit just right again. His appetite had returned to normal. Everyday he felt stronger, using his shoulder was less painful.

  His heart wasn’t beating ninety to nothing this evening, as it had been on his wedding day in July. But today was an entirely different situation. He’d put on a smile and pretend he was having the time of his life. He was happy for Jason and Sally.

  He opened the drawer of the chifforobe and fingered Texanna’s pink unmentionables. They were so sheer his hand was visible through them. He lifted them to his face. They were soft against his cheek and carried the scent of the lavender sachet she’d sprinkled in the drawer. He sighed and put them back. No need to torture himself. She was gone, and he had no reassurance she’d find her way back.

  The locket lay on a lacy handkerchief. Sunlight winked off the polished gold. With his thumb, he rubbed the turquoise stone until it warmed. He’d wanted to leave it with Texanna, but needed it to return to Garrett. It had entered his mind to take Garrett with him and live with Texanna in the future. But the picture she’d painted of the future stopped him. It didn’t sound like a place he’d want to raise a child. No, they belonged here.

  Though Texanna told him how the locket supposedly worked, he couldn’t bear putting her on the train alone or without seeing her to her final destination. That fateful day, he feared she’d disappear without him, so he’d held her close and wrapped the locket around each of their wrists. Evidently it worked. He’d propped his booted feet on the wall of the train car so when the light burst and the train lurched, Texanna had been jostled as little as possible. The sights he’d seen, he’d never forget, nor the agony of watching Texanna being ushered away in an odd conveyance with flashing lights.

  Garrett’s boots sounded in the hall outside his door. “Pa, I’m ready. Let’s hurry. I want to see the twins.”

  “Coming, Son.” Royce dropped the locket back onto the lacy cloth and closed the drawer, unaware how the turquoise grew even hotter making the gold glow warmly. He slipped into his jacket. At the front door, he retrieved his dress hat, and they started for the buckboard out front.

  Garrett was finally beginning to move past his grief. Texanna had only been with them a little over a month, but she’d forged a place in their hearts. School had started and that helped. He was busier, and his young, pretty teacher spent extra time with him and a few of the other kids. He brought books home in the evening, and he and Royce sat at the table and worked on his letters. The boy had a good mind, and learning came easy for him. Royce was proud.

  Royce and Garrett arrived at the church in plenty of time. Royce half listened to the chatter on the lawn as he unhitched Josie and hobbled her so she could enjoy the grass and stay in the shade. He’d leave her here and walk to the town hall for the dance. It wasn’t far, so there was no need to hitch Josie to the wagon again. He leaned against the wagon and tried to relax while he waited. No need to enter the church any sooner than necessary. Garrett ran ahead to visit the babies.

  Royce had to admit, they were a treat to see. Both were happy and loving. Doc had been worried Nathan might not be normal due to his lack of oxygen at birth. But the boy kept up with his sister and was ahead in some areas. He was even-tempered while Pearl was impatient with a terrible temper. She could shout the house down. Matthew’s happiness and contentment pleased Royce. But sometimes, it was all too much to bear, and he had to distance himself from the happy family. Molly was quick to understand and helped him find an escape route if he needed one.

  The church was full. It was time for the ceremony to start, so Royce joined his brothers at the altar. Garrett sat with Molly to help keep the twins quiet. The boy would love to have brothers and sisters, and Royce hoped someday he’d have them. He just wished their mother would be Texanna. But it wasn’t meant to be, so he might as well put the notion from his mind and get on with life.

  The organist started the wedding march, and the bride started down the aisle on her father’s arm. She was beautiful with her gold blond hair and blue eyes. Her happy smile beneath the veil both warmed and twisted his heart. Her father placed her hand in the groom’s, and they turned to face the preacher.

  Brother Riley beamed down at them and cleared his throat several times. “D
early beloved, we are gathered here today in the sight of God and these witnesses to join this young couple in the vows of holy matrimony.”

  The vows of commitment fell heavy on Royce’s heart. Why God had given him so much and then taken it away leaving him empty and broken, Royce didn’t know.

  “Do you take this woman…for better, for worse…in sickness and in health…for as long as you both shall live?”

  Royce felt a roaring in his head making him slightly dizzy. He closed his eyes and let his mind wander back to another day—a day in July. On that day, his heart had been whole and near bursting with happiness. Royce shoved the image aside. Today was Jason’s day. Royce’s had been several yesterdays ago.

  When the ceremony ended, Jason kissed Sally. The crowd stood and rushed forward to congratulate the couple. Royce stepped up. “Move over, Jason. It’s my turn.” Royce grinned at Jason’s rigid jaw as he took Sally in his arms. He pretended to aim for Sally’s mouth, deflected at the last minute, and kissed her cheek. With a chuckle, Royce whispered in Sally’s ear. “I don’t have to tell you to keep Jason on his toes. I know you will. Texanna said you were the perfect wife for him.”

  Sally’s blue eyes turned tender, and she hugged him. “She was some lady. I miss her.”

  Royce nodded and stepped back.

  Jason, big grin on his face, grabbed Royce around the neck. “Get away from my wife, old man.”

  Royce hugged his younger brother. “I’m happy for you, runt.” Matthew stepped up and took Royce’s place.

  Royce needed to get outside. He made his way to the church lawn and sucked in deep gulps of air. Put it behind you, Royce. Move forward, not back.

  Royce started as a hand touched his arm. Sally’s widowed sister from Austin looked up at him. He wasn’t sure but thought her name was Ruby.

  “It’s lovely out tonight.” As she spoke, she looked up at the sky.

  He cleared his throat. “Yes, it is. I’m surprised it’s not colder.” Her arms were bare, and her skin had a pearly glow. If he touched her, she’d be smooth as silk. Her gown dipped low in the front exposing a good portion of her breasts. They were lovely, but he preferred women to be a little more modest when it came to showing their charms.

  “Don’t you need a wrap?” Royce knew she wouldn’t be shocked if he touched her. Over the past month she’d been in Waco, he’d seen her at church and at Sally’s folks, and she’d made it clear she would welcome his advances.

  “I have one in Papa’s buggy. Will you walk me there to fetch it?” Royce took her arm, and they strolled toward the buggies.

  He reached into the back seat and picked up a blue velvet cape. “Is this yours?”

  “Yes, it is.” She turned her back to him and dropped her head forward exposing the skin of her neck and back where her gown dipped low. The exposed skin was tempting. He wanted to lean forward and place a kiss on her nape. The thought chilled him, and he quickly covered her with her cape.

  She turned back around. “Thank you.”

  He extended an arm. “May I walk you to City Hall for the dance?”

  “I’d like that.” She placed her hand on his arm.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Texanna almost shouted with joy when the light burst behind her closed eyes. It had happened. She’d traveled back. She wanted to open her eyes and see the train’s changed interior, but fear kept them tightly closed. Gingerly, she touched the seat and sighed with relief to find it hard and uncomfortable. Her rear-end told her it was, but she’d had to double check. She opened one eye and saw the lit kerosene lamps on each side of the door that led to the next car and breathed, “Thank you, God.”

  Her hand went to her breast to clasp the locket. It was gone. Panicked, she searched her clothes hoping to find it in the folds. When that failed, she stood and searched the seat, and then the floor. No! Oh God, please don’t do this to me. She sat back down, closed her eyes, and took deep breaths to calm herself. She had to be in the right time, please God. Tears dropped from beneath her eyelids, and she gulped back her despair. Have faith, Texanna. Just compose yourself and have faith.

  The noise of the train speeding along the tracks kept time with the gallop of her heart. Her mind wouldn’t stop jumping from one thought to another. Forget the locket. Think about something else—Royce. How would he react when he saw her? It’d been over four months. What had he told folks when she’d disappeared again? Was her reappearance going to be a problem? That was too bad if it was. They’d come up with something to tell them.

  When the train stopped, she stepped off the coach and stared at her surroundings. It looked the same as when she’d left. Heart pounding with anticipation, she breathed in the cool fresh air. Yes, there was the smell of manure and coal from the train, but the scent was comforting.

  It was dusk, and few people were out on the streets. Dim lights flickered from a couple of businesses. Laughter and the tinkle of the piano from the saloon across the street echoed on the air. The streetlights didn’t give off much illumination, especially compared to the bright ones of the twenty-first century. She picked up her carpetbag and started toward the community center. It was getting too late to be on the streets alone, and she had to know if she’d arrived on time. Without the locket, she wasn’t sure.

  The lights in City Hall were dimly lit. She’d never been inside but knew the building was used for community functions such as weddings, receptions, and dances. Her shoe heels echoed on the wood plank floor as she entered. But for the beautiful table set with a tall cake, punch bowl, and other snacks, the room was empty. Atop the cake stood the delicate figure formed of confectioner’s sugar of a bride and groom. Napkins lined the one end of the table. She sighed with relief at the banner reading ‘Congratulations Sally and Jason’ tacked on the back wall.

  Texanna was nervous and didn’t know how she should go about presenting herself. She’d considered standing outside to wait for Royce but discarded that idea. Maybe she could stay incognito for a while until an opportunity arose. She hung her cape on the cloak rack and found a chair in the far corner of the room. It was so dark, and, with the deep blue of her dress, she’d be hard to spot.

  As guests arrived, Texanna watched with pleasure as they filled the room with happy chatter. When Royce entered, she stopped breathing and gaped. She stifled the moan that bubbled in her throat with her fist. Her husband, her love…he’d lost weight, and his face looked gaunt. Had he been ill, worse yet, wounded? Fear rushed through her veins like ice water. Oh Royce, my love… She stood to move toward him and then noticed the handsome woman on his arm. Stunned, she plopped back down into the chair.

  The woman’s blond hair was piled high on her head, and pearl earrings hung from her ears. When Royce took her cloak and hung it on the rack, Texanna could see her low-cut dress showed the skin of her back and a fair amount of breast above the neckline. The woman clung to Royce and squeezed close to whisper in his ear. Her action brought her breasts in contact with Royce’s arm and gave him a good view of her cleavage. His eyes dropped to the abundance of flesh. Jealousy clawed at Texanna, and it took all her strength to keep herself seated.

  Jason and Sally entered on a flurry of laughter and chit-chat. Sally, lovely in Pearl’s wedding gown, was flushed with happiness. Texanna’s heart sang for the joy she saw in both Jason and Sally’s faces. She tried to concentrate on the happy couple, but her attention kept returning to Royce and the blonde together in the receiving line. Texanna noticed his face was drawn, but when he smiled down at the woman, the lines vanished.

  Matthew moved to the middle of the room. “Folks, raise your punch cups. I’d like to make a toast to my baby brother and his beautiful bride.” The young couple moved to his side, their faces aglow. “Sally, Jason. Live and love as if every moment is your last. Don’t let the sun go down on your anger, and love each other enough to forgive. We hope your lives will be blessed with many special moments and lots of healthy children.”

  Royce raised his cup. �
��Here, here!” Through the tears in her eyes, Texanna could see the sheen in Royce’s. A look passed between the three brothers, and they moved together to slap around on each other in a manly hug. Texanna had to bite her fist to keep from sobbing.

  A cord sounded as one of the violinist drew his bow across the strings. It broke the tension. At the end of the room, a musical group was set up ready to play. The bride and groom moved onto the floor as the band started playing a waltz. Like Royce, Jason was a good dancer, and he twirled Sally around the room. They had eyes only for each other and didn’t notice when their guests joined them on the floor.

  Royce hadn’t once glanced her way. Why should he? He had the blonde’s breasts to keep his eyes occupied. Texanna’s face heated with anger. She wanted to walk toward the pair, grab the woman’s exaggerated neckline, and yank it up to her eyeballs. But that would serve no purpose and only make her appearance more shocking.

  Texanna’s heart turned over when she saw Garrett push his way through the guests to get a piece of cake. She choked back a sob. He’d grown taller in the past few months. He looked up to make sure he wasn’t watched, and when he did, his eyes locked with hers. He froze, looked around, and then back at her. Mouth open, he drew in air to yell, but she covered her lips with a finger and shook her head. His mouth snapped shut, but he still hadn’t moved. She held out her hand and, like a sleepwalker, he started toward her.

  Thanks goodness the dance floor was crowded. Due to swirling guests, she could no longer see Garrett but within a short moment he stood before her.

  Tears choked him. “Ma?”

  Texanna nodded and opened her arms. He flew into them, and her soft sobs joined his. “Shhh now, don’t cry. We’ve got to be quiet. Sit beside me so we can talk.”

  “But you’re dead. We buried you.”

  “Garrett, I don’t know the whole story, but I think your pa used the locket to take me back home. He didn’t want me to die and knew I could be healed in my own time. Since he had the locket, he never expected me to get back and thought it best for everyone to think I was dead.” She clutched his hand. “That’s all I really know. Can you trust us to tell you everything later? I don’t have a clue how to let your pa know I’m here.”