Playing With Fire (Guarded Hearts)

by Noelle, Alexis

  I jumped up from the bed. He'd taken this shit too far. I was going to find him and make sure he never even thought about her again, much less came near her. I felt her grab my arm and turned around to meet her eyes. She looked so scared that it only fueled my anger more. I shook her off and headed for the door.

  "Carter, wait, please!"

  I turned around, but I didn't answer her. I didn't trust my voice right now. I was too angry and I needed to go find him.

  "Carter, please don't leave. Please just stay with me. I know you're mad and I'm sorry."

  Wait, what? She thought I was mad at her? I needed to calm myself down. "What are you talking about, baby?"

  "You're mad because Chris was here. It's my fault he even came. I never meant to bring all of this drama to you, and I know I'm putting you in danger by just being here."

  Is she crazy? She really has no idea how much I love her. She is so used to the dysfunctional relationship she had with Chris. It makes sense that she thinks I'm mad at her. He always blamed her for everything.

  I had to fix this. I pulled her into me and held her until we both calmed down. I led her to the couch and sat her next to me. Before she even got all the way down, she was climbing into my lap. She wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face in my chest. I couldn't leave her like this. She needed me here, but that didn't mean this was over.

  Madison

  If I held him long enough, maybe he'd forgive me. I hate that I brought Chris and all of my problems into Carter's life. He deserved better than me, but I wasn't sure I could live without him. He turned his head toward me and gave me a kiss on the lips.

  "I'm not mad at you, baby." What? How is he not mad at me? This whole situation is my fault. "I'm mad because that asshole came in my house and had the nerve to put his hands on you. It kills me that I wasn't here. I'm mad at myself for that. I never should have left you here."

  Until right now, I completely forgot that he'd ever left. "Where did you go?"

  "I woke up because I was hungry and when I went to the kitchen, I barely had any food. So I took a ride to Raw Bar to surprise you. I'm so sorry, baby. I should have just stayed here with you."

  He went to get me sushi? He is so thoughtful and now he feels guilty about it. Just then, my stomach sounded and let Carter know he made the right decision. "That was so nice of you to do that. I'm not mad at you, and neither is my stomach." He chuckled. God I loved hearing that sound.

  "I'd do anything for you. Come on, let's eat."

  Carter

  After lunch, we lay on the couch and watched TV, talked and laughed. It was a perfect afternoon, but we were ignoring the elephant in the room. I had to get it out. We needed to talk about this. She needed to know I wasn't just going to let this go. I sat up and she followed. She looked at me with confusion written all over her face. "We need to talk about everything."

  "Okay." I could tell that her mind was preparing for the worst.

  "I don't want you going anywhere on your own. If I can't be with you, Shawn or Jason will. I already talked to them about it. You need to let me know if he tries to contact you. The only class you have with him next semester, I'm in too. I'll take care of him soon enough."

  I'd texted Jason about what happened earlier and he decided to pay Chris a visit. When he got there, he found out that Chris went back home till the start of next semester. I didn't care, though. I didn't trust that he wouldn't make a special trip down here just to get to her.

  "What are you going to do?" She had fear etched all over her face, and I hated it.

  "I don't know yet but I'm not going to let him get away with it."

  She looked at me and I could see the tears that wanted to escape, but she was trying to hold them back. "I'm scared, Carter. I'd never forgive myself if something happened to you because of me. Chris has serious anger problems. You don't even know everything."

  "Then tell me." I wanted to know but, at the same time, I didn't want to hear all of the things he used to do to her. It made me sick to my stomach just thinking about it.

  "Most of the time, he'd just hit or kick me, really. He did it in places you normally didn't see like my legs, stomach or back. Toward the end, though, he used to make me give him hand jobs and blow jobs."

  I couldn't believe this. I wanted to throw up. How could he do this to her? Why didn't she tell anyone?

  "He'd remind me on a daily basis that if I ever told anyone, he'd make sure I'd regret it. Before I came here the other night, he threatened to kill you and me. He knew that first day I met you that there was something between us, and it got worse after that. I just needed you to know this. I hate that I'm putting you in danger by just being with you."

  "Listen to me, I'll keep you safe. I'm not going to let him hurt you, and the guys are completely on board with this too. For once in your life, Maddy, you have people that care about you. Just let us."

  "I really don't know what I'd do without you, Carter."

  "So, is it safe to assume you're spending your winter break with me?" The smile on her face was breathtaking, and I loved that I could put it there.

  "I'm not sure yet. What did you plan on doing?" She gave me a little smile to show that she knew exactly what she was asking. Why tell her when I could show her?

  I grabbed her and kissed her, then gently eased her down so she was lying on the couch. I settled myself on top of her and enjoyed having her finally be mine. I ran my hands up and down her sides, then I started kissing her neck, collarbone, and gently bit her earlobe. The sounds that she was making should be illegal.

  She ran her fingernails down my back and I let out a low groan. She was incredible. All she'd been through and she still had the capacity to love. She ground her hips against mine and I reached my limit. I jumped up and started walking toward the bedroom. I knew she wasn't ready for this.

  "Where are you going?" She was clearly confused about my abrupt departure.

  "To take an ice cold shower or two." Her giggle was the last thing I heard before I closed the door.

  Madison

  Being here with Carter today had been the best day of my life. I never thought I could be so happy in a relationship. While he was showering, I worked on cleaning up. I hated that he jumped off of me earlier.

  I knew that he was just being considerate after what Chris had done, but he wasn't Chris. I wasn't ready to have sex with Carter, but I loved being able to be intimate with him and being comfortable with it.

  Someone knocked at the door and my heart stopped. Should I answer it? It wasn't even my house, and Carter was still in the shower.

  I stood there staring at the door when I heard someone yell. "This shit isn't getting any lighter, you know!" I immediately recognized Shawn's voice and hurried to let him in. He and Jason were standing there with cardboard boxes in their hands. "Two Musketeers movers at your service, Yoko Ono."

  "Why did you call me that?"

  He smiled. "Because you're breaking up our group just like she did to the Beatles." I laughed at his reference of me stealing Carter from them, but what were they talking about with the mover's thing?

  Jason shoved him and then looked over to me. "Don't mind him. I think he may be in love with Carter more than you are." We all laughed at that.

  Just then, Carter walked out of the bedroom in only his sweatpants. Oh my, the sight of him was enough to make me melt. His hair was still wet from the shower and messed up to perfection. His chest and his abs were so defined that they didn't even look real. He looked like one of the models you see in the magazines that couldn't possibly look like that in real life. His pants hung just under that delicious V that led to the place that I so desperately wanted to explore.

  "Yo, Carter. You gonna stand there like a Calvin Klein model, or you gonna come help us?" Jason yelled from the door.

  Carter looked at me and smirked. He'd caught me ogling him. "Yeah, let me throw shoes on!" he yelled back. He slipped his sneakers on and followed them outside. I walked o
ut of the door and saw Jason's truck bursting with boxes and other furniture.

  Wait a minute. That was all of my stuff. What was going on? They all came in with boxes and I went up to Carter. Before I could even ask him what was happening, he looked at me and said, "I knew you didn't have any of your stuff with you and I didn't want you going anywhere near Chris' house. So, I called Shawn and Jason and begged them to get your stuff and bring it over. If they missed anything, we can figure it out later. I hope you're not pissed at me, I just couldn't stand-"

  I grabbed his face between my hands. "You're the most thoughtful, incredible, amazing, and wonderful man I could have ever asked for, Carter James." He leaned down and kissed me. It wasn't intense like earlier, just gentle and loving.

  "I need to go help the guys. Would you mind putting away the groceries? I also promised them dinner and beer. I hope you don't mind."

  "No! Of course I don't mind! I'll cook so you can relax too. Isn't there a game on tonight? Tell the guys they're welcome to stay as long as they want."

  He leaned down and gave me one last kiss. "You're perfect." He swatted my butt and I giggled as I watched him walk away.

  Carter

  After the guys left, Maddy and I went to bed. This day had been great. She fit into my life so well, and I hoped she'd never leave it. We both had a really long day and, truthfully, I couldn't wait to hold her in my arms again.

  All day I avoided asking her if she was staying permanently. To be honest, I was scared of the answer. It was amazing being able to be with her and I wanted it to be like that every day. I sat down on the bed and looked at her. "So, I know we still have a few more weeks, but what's going to happen next semester? Are you going to go back to the dorms? Or did you want to move in permanently?"

  I was trying to hide the desperation in my voice. If she wanted to live at the dorms, I needed to accept that and not let her know how disappointed I was.

  "I think that's up to you, babe. I love just being able to be here with you. I just don't want to crowd you." Crowd me?

  She could be permanently attached to me and it still wouldn't be enough. I needed to remember how things were with her and Chris. She needed reassurance that she was wanted, appreciated, and loved. "Baby, if it's up to me, not only you're going to live in this house, but you're never leaving this bed." I grabbed her and yanked her down on top on me. She laughed, leaned down and started to kiss me. She rolled on her side and ran her fingers through my hair.

  "If I'm going to be here through the holidays, do you think we could decorate? If you don't want to, it's okay."

  She wanted to decorate my house? My mom always decorated for the holidays but since she was gone, we never really knew how to do it right. I leaned up and gave her one more kiss. "We'll go get a tree and all the trimmings tomorrow. Whatever you want, baby."

  "All I want is you." God, it felt amazing to hear her say those words.

  "You've had that since the first time I saw you."

  Chapter Seven

  Madison

  It was Christmas Eve. Carter and I had been living together for almost two weeks now and it was amazing. We decorated his house with all of the Christmas decorations that we could find in the stores.

  I thought everything was beautiful. I'd never decorated a house I was living in for Christmas, and I loved that I got to do this first with him...even though our tree looked bi-polar because my side was all very organized and neat, and Carter's was just kind of all mixed together in random order.

  He wanted to spend our first Christmas alone together, but we made plans to go to his dad's house later in the afternoon. We were going to stay for a few days, and Carter was excited to show me some of the places he went to growing up.

  I'd even started working at the coffee house that Nicole worked at. She talked to the manager for me and explained that I'd come down with an illness and that was why I never showed up last time. I was lucky that he was so nice and willing to give me a second chance.

  Carter kept his promise and I was never alone, even when I was working. He'd sit in the coffee house playing on his computer, or just talking to me when we weren't busy. When Carter had work, Shawn or Jason would be there with me.

  At first, I felt horrible that Carter was making them babysit me, so I paid them with coffee and cake pops. I ended up getting really close to both guys and they embraced me as one of the group. Shawn was even trying to think of a new group name that had four members in it.

  I'd never been happier with anyone in my life, except there was one problem. We hadn't slept together yet! And it was not from lack of trying on my part. Every time we got close, he stopped it. I knew he thought I wasn't ready, but I couldn't possibly be any more ready.

  He was scared that he'd hurt me because of everything that happened with Chris. I understood where he was coming from, but Carter made me forget about everything else when I was with him. I didn't care what he thought, at this point. Tonight was the night.

  I called Nicole yesterday and talked to her about wanting to take the next step with him. She insisted on treating me to a girls' day at the spa and hair salon. It was difficult to get Carter to let me go without him. He was still on high alert from everything that happened with Chris, even though we hadn't seen him since that day.

  I understood why he was so worried, and I appreciated how much he cared about me. With promises to check in every hour and stay together, I'd won.

  I got my light brown hair highlighted with caramel strands, had my nails done, and had every possible surface waxed. When I got home, Carter came rushing up to me asking me why I was walking funny, and I had to lie to him and tell him I fell.

  We were getting ready for bed and I took some extra time in the bathroom. I curled my hair the way he loved, and did my makeup a little heavier than I normally would. I'd stashed my sexy Santa outfit in here yesterday. Nicole had insisted I get it for tonight. It was red velvet with white fur trim. I slipped it on carefully to try to keep the bells from jingling, put my feet into my red high heels and opened the door. I walked into the bedroom and Carter looked up at me.

  "Fuck."

  Carter

  When she walked into the bedroom, all of the willpower I'd been holding onto these past two weeks vanished. Maddy was gorgeous in jeans and a T-shirt but in this outfit, she was enough to stop my heart.

  My dick started to get hard before she even took a step toward me. The dress stopped right below her ass, dipped so low up top that it should be against the law, and her red high heels made her legs look amazing. She was looking at me with this sexy smirk, and I was completely hers in that moment. She walked over to me with the little bells on the outfit jingling with each step.

  Maddy had been trying to initiate sex, but I didn't want to rush into it. Now I knew that it was inevitable, and she'd made it pretty clear that she was more than ready. "You look gorgeous, baby…when did you get that?"

  I saw the blush creep up on her face and it only turned me on more. She was so beautiful and sexy, but she really had no idea she was. "Do you like it?"

  Was she kidding? The fact that I couldn't put a full sentence together should have been her first clue. Just then, I realized that I was still sitting on the bed. I got up and slowly walked over to her. I wanted to remember every detail of tonight.

  I brushed one of her stray curls behind her ear, wrapped my hand around the back of her neck and kissed her. Her hands found their way into my hair, like they always seemed to do. I moved down to her neck and started to kiss her all over, making lines from ear to ear and then going down her neck and across her collarbone. Though, if she kept making those little sounds, I really wasn't sure how long I could last.

  I pulled back and looked at her. I needed to make sure she was really ready and not just doing this because she thought I expected it. Although at this point, if she changed her mind, no amount of cold showers would help me.

  I pulled away and looked in her gorgeous hazel eyes. "Are you sure about t
his? I don't want to rush you. I'd wait forever for you." She looked at me with the most adorable smile on her face.

  "Carter, I've wanted this since I moved in. I love you, I trust you, and I know you'll never hurt me. I want this, Carter. I. Want. You."

  That was all I needed to hear. I grabbed her and kissed her with everything I'd been holding back. She let out a moan. I pulled back to look at her. How did I ever get so lucky that she chose me? I found the zipper on the back of her outfit and eased it down. It fell down around her feet, and then I saw what she had on underneath.

  All that was left was a pair of red lace boy shorts, and those heels. The image of her legs wrapped around me with those heels on was permanently etched in my mind. We'd need to revisit that another night. I wanted tonight to be perfect for her.

  I'd had my fair share of sex, but tonight was the first time I was ever going to make love to someone; the first time it was actually going to matter. I led her over to the bed and laid her down. I just stood there and looked at her body. She was fucking perfect. I started to take off my shirt, but she grabbed my hand to stop me.

  "Let me do it." She took my shirt off, then went to work on my belt. She eased my pants down and then my boxers. The look on her face was priceless. I grabbed her and started kissing her again, then I eased her down on the bed.

  I lay next to her and began to run my hands all over her body. Her hands were stroking my back up and down, then they found my ass and she gave it a little squeeze. I laughed at that and she let out a little giggle. I got up and got undressed before situating myself next to her on the bed again.