Sheet Music - A Rock 'n' Roll Love Story

by Ann Lister

  “Look, Annie. I’ve been hearing things about Michael, that’s all.”

  “What kind of ‘things’?”

  “That he’s been seeing other women while you’ve been laid up here.”

  “That’s bullshit.”

  “Maybe so, but how would you know?”

  Annie bit her tongue and sucked in a deep breath. She quickly thought back over the last few days trying to remember Michael’s nighttime whereabouts. There was no way he was cheating on her, she thought. No possible way in hell. She wouldn’t allow herself to even consider it.

  “What exactly do you mean by that comment?” she questioned Gary, trying to keep the anger out of her voice.

  “I’ve upset you and that’s the last thing I wanted to do. On the other hand, I refuse to sit back and watch him screw you over and walk way.”

  “You’re assuming something you have no proof of. Michael loves me. He wouldn’t do something like that and walk way. You must be confused or something.”

  “Okay. Fine. Believe what you want, Annie. All I’m asking is for you to be careful and mindful of his reputation.”

  Gary’s words hit Annie like a ton of bricks. It took every ounce of strength she had to maintain herself and not let Gary know how upset he had made her. Their conversation was cut short by the sound of the front door. Michael breezed in and quickly crossed the room to give Annie a kiss.

  “How’s it going, Gary?” Michael asked without emotion.

  “Fine. How about you?”

  The two men shook hands and eyed each other with suspicion.

  “Annie tells me that Flesh won the contest?” Gary asked.

  “Yeah, they did. We hit the road with them in a few weeks.”

  Gary nodded and glanced back at Annie.

  Michael’s eyes drifted back and forth between Annie and Gary.

  A cold shiver shot up Annie’s spine. The thought of him kissing another woman while she slept in his bed made her stomach churn. Thinking the worst, she dropped her eyes from his and turned toward the window behind the leather couch.

  He knew her moods too well. “Are you okay, babe?” Michael asked.

  “Yeah, Gary was just filling me in on some stuff, that’s all.”

  “Okay, just don’t get too tired,” he said, his eyes settling back onto Gary and narrowing slightly. “Don’t go upsetting her, man. She’s been through a lot, you know.”

  “I’m well aware.”

  Michael held Gary’s stare for a moment before heading for the doorway. “If you need anything, let me know,” he said, exiting the room and entering the kitchen. A few minutes later, lightening fast guitar licks, that had made him famous around the world, could be heard echoing in from the music room.

  Gary stayed a while longer until Annie began showing visible signs of exhaustion. He kissed her good-bye and prepared to show himself to the front door. Michael was in the kitchen when he caught a glimpse of Gary moving through the foyer.

  “Hey, Gary, I’d like to talk to you before you leave,” Michael said.

  Gary turned and followed the sound of Michael’s voice back into the kitchen.

  Taking a plastic bottle of water from the refrigerator, Michael turned and faced Gary, while breaking the seal on the container. “Listen, Gary. I wasn’t thrilled when Annie said you were coming by to visit, but I’d never deny her contact with friends. However, if your visits are going to upset her, then I’d rather you didn’t come again.”

  Gary studied Michael’s face and the coldness in his eyes. “Why? Are you afraid of what I might tell her?”

  “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

  Gary shook his head.

  Michael leaned against the refrigerator and took another gulp of water. “Look. All I’m saying is her emotional state is hanging by a very thin thread. Did she mention the nightmares about the accident she has almost nightly?”

  “No. It didn’t come up in conversation.”

  “I figured as much. I’ve been trying to get her to agree to see a therapist but so far she refuses.” Michael swallowed more water, then wiped his lips with the back of his hand. “Let me bottom-line the situation for you, Gary. I’ve got my hands more than full getting prepared for the Fall leg of our tour, plus I’m trying to get Annie healthy again. The last thing I need is for you to cause any regression in her recovery. Know what I’m saying?”

  “If there’s a relapse, the cause won’t be from my visits. Maybe you should look in your own backyard,” Gary sputtered.

  Michael took a step closer to Gary. “What the fuck does that mean?”

  Gary tightened his stare. “Look, some good friends of mine saw you and Brian at the Bare Bones restaurant last week and the blond ‘scarves’ you were both ‘wearing’.”

  “Then I guess your friends should have come over to our table so I could have introduced them to our tour manager's daughters,” Michael stated evenly.

  Gary nodded and smiled. “I’ll see you later, Mike,” and proceeded toward the front door. “Friendly warning though,” he said, turning around to face Michael again. “Don’t even think of hurting her.”

  “Go home, Gary.”

  By the end of the month, Annie was sleeping more than she seemed to be awake. Michael didn’t like what he was seeing at all. If he had his way, he would have canceled the tour to stay home with her, but he knew from experience, a road tour waited for no one. The only choice he had was to accelerate Annie’s home care while he was gone and put Bonita in charge of following it. If she had any problems, she knew where to contact him at all times.

  The day before Michael left for the tour, he was in the process of pulling clothing out of his closet and drawers to pack when Annie hobbled into the room.

  “Michael, we need to talk.”

  “Sure. What do you want to talk about?”

  “This arrangement.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Me staying here while you’re on tour.”

  The tone of her voice made him stop what he was doing and face her. “What is it you’re trying to say, babe?”

  She was sitting on the edge of the bed looking glassy eyed and exhausted. But it was her body language that disturbed him more. She was cold and distant, something that was totally unlike her.

  “I don’t want to stay here while you’re gone,” she said bluntly.

  “I don’t understand.”

  “It won't feel right. It's your home, not mine. Without you in it, I'd be nothing more than a visitor and a burden to Bonita. I don't want to do it. I can't do it.”

  “What the hell are you talking about? We’ve already discussed this and I thought everything was fine.”

  “No, you discussed it and decided everything was fine. I never said I was comfortable with it.”

  He shook his head and rubbed at his face. “Annie, I’m leaving tomorrow. I don’t have time to fix this now.”

  “Nothing needs to be fixed. I’ll take care of it.”

  “And what does that mean?”

  “I want to move back into my old apartment.”

  “Are you out of your mind?”

  “Yes, damn it, I am! That’s exactly what I’ve been trying to tell you for the last week! If I stay here alone while you’re gone, I will lose the last bit of sanity I have left. For my own health, I have to leave. This fucking house is eating me alive and I need help that you can’t give me. I need my own place, my own furniture, my own God-damned bed.”

  Michael stepped in front of her and pressed her head against his stomach. “What’s really going on here, babe? Are you trying to tell me you no longer want to be with me?” he asked, his voice soft and comforting.

  “It’s not you. It’s me.”

  Michael laughed nervously. “That used to be one of my favorite lines.”

  “It's not a line , Michael. It's the truth.”

  Annie hopped off the bed and hobbled to the wall of windows. “My head is so mixed up right now I could scream. M
ost days I can’t stand to be inside my own skin. I look in the mirror and the reflection of someone I don’t know stares back at me. I don’t like myself.”

  He came up behind her and slid his arms around her waist. “I worry about you. You’re already over-medicating yourself and that scares the hell out of me.”

  “It’s pain medication!”

  “And you think because it was prescribed by a doctor you can’t become addicted?” Annie pushed his arms off and limped away. “I’m not an addict.”

  Anxious to resolve the issue, he followed her. “Okay. So you’re not

  over-medicating,” he stated, grabbing her by the arm to stop her. “Look, I’ll only be gone a few weeks and then there’s a break in the schedule. When I get back we can move to another house, if you don’t like this one. I honestly don’t care where we live as long as you’re with me.”

  Annie made a face. “A few weeks? You mean six weeks and I can’t wait that long.”

  “Jesus! Why are you doing this to me now?”

  “Because you won’t listen! Every time I’ve brought up this subject you’ve selectively tuned me out because you don’t want to hear it. Well, now you’ve finally heard me and you don’t like what I have to say. I’m sorry about that, but when you get back from the tour, I won’t be here.”

  His arms slid around her waist again. “Annie, Annie, Annie. Please. I love you. If you leave now, I will spend the entire tour out of my mind with worry.”

  “It's okay. I'll be okay. While you're gone, I will put all my energy into getting my head straight and my body healed. Maybe I'll even talk to a therapist. When you come back, I'll be a whole new person. By then, I'll have my cast off and I'll be getting physical therapy. I'll take care of all of it.”

  Annie sat on the edge of the bed again. “I would be too lonely waiting for you here, Michael. At least I’d be surrounded with familiar things in my old apartment. I can’t bear the thought of sleeping in that bed without you. I can’t do it,” she said, softly rubbing the comforter.

  Michael exhaled loudly. “Okay.”

  “I’ll call and set up the physical therapy sessions. You won’t have to worry about a thing.”

  “When do you think you’ll move?” he asked, his voice full of hurt.

  “In a few days, maybe a week. I’m not sure. I’ll see how it goes.”

  “Are you sure you’ll be okay?”

  “Yes!”

  As soon as Michael left for the tour, Bonita noticed a remarkable change in Annie’s demeanor. Gary had been to the house several times and each visit had left Annie emptier than the last. They had set a move date for the end of the week and Annie couldn’t have been happier. The sooner she was out of his house, the better, and Gary was only too happy to help.

  Three days after Michael’s departure, Annie forced herself out of bed to endure another visit from the in-home nurse. Bonita had left to run some errands in town, leaving Annie alone in the house, when the phone rang. On the fifth ring, Annie finally managed to reach it.

  “Hello,” she sighed through clenched teeth.

  “Bonita?”

  “No.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry. I wasn’t aware Michael had hired a new maid. What’s your name, honey?”

  “My name is Annie and I’m not the maid. Who the hell are you?”

  “Ohhh, I’m sorry, Annie. This is Beth - Michael’s ex-wife. Is he there?”

  “No, he isn’t. He’s on tour,” Annie replied, her face flushing with nerves.

  “Right, the tour. I was hoping to catch him before he hit the road.”

  “Sorry, you missed him, but I’ll tell him you called.”

  “So, you must be the girl from the accident,” Beth pushed on, sensing Annie’s intent to end their conversation. “I didn’t think you’d still be together.”

  “Why would you think that?”

  Beth laughed. “Michael’s never been known for longevity in relationships, at least since we’ve been divorced.”

  “He’s different now,” Annie retorted.

  Beth giggled again which annoyed Annie immensely.

  “So you think you’re the one that changed the man, Annie? I hope you’re right and don’t get your heart trampled. I’ve known Michael a lot longer than you’ve probably been alive and his patterns have never changed.”

  The conversation went downhill from there, leaving Annie close to hysteria. In twenty minutes, Beth had managed to paint a picture of Michael so ugly and distasteful, Annie didn’t know what to believe.

  “If you don’t believe me, call the hotel where he is staying. Use the code names I told you about and see for yourself who answers the phone. Don’t bother with his cell phone. Call the hotel room. I’m telling you, Michael will never change,” Beth warned.

  Through her medication-induced paranoia, Annie became confused by Beth’s cruel words. Rationalizing what was real to her and what Beth described became distorted. In a distrusting moment, Annie relented and called the hotel Michael had listed on his itinerary. It was early in California and Annie figured he’d probably still be sleeping. She used the code names Beth had mentioned and, to her surprise, the front desk quickly rang his room. After several rings, a female voice answered the phone.

  “I’m sorry, I must have dialed the wrong number,” Annie apologized.

  Again, she had the front desk put her through to Michael’s room. The same female answered somewhat more annoyed by the second disturbance.

  “I’m looking for Michael Wade,” Annie proclaimed, her voice shaking with emotion.

  “She’s looking for Mike,” the woman whispered to another person in the room. “What do you want me to tell her?”

  “He’s sleeping,” the muffled male voice in the background replied.

  The voice was garbled and Annie couldn’t be certain it was Michael. But Beth had planted the seed of distrust and doubt in her brain. Compound that with the garbage Gary had been feeding her, and Annie was broken. She had heard all she needed to hear. Quietly, she hung up the phone. Her last strand of sanity had snapped in two.

  Her next call was to Gary.

  “Can you come get me?” Annie sobbed.

  “Why, what happened?”

  “Can you come or not? I have to get out of here now.”

  “I’m on my way.”

  Annie managed to pack the few personal items she had in Michael’s house into a suitcase and was waiting on the front steps when Gary arrived. Annie sunk into the front seat of Gary’s car and grimaced in pain. “I’m sorry to bother you.”

  “You don’t need to apologize, Annie. I’m glad I was home. Can you tell me why you’re so upset?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it right now. Do you mind?”

  “No, I understand,” Gary replied, gently patting her on the forearm. “I’m taking you back to your apartment, right?”

  “Hell no,” Annie quickly answered. “That would be the first place Michael would think to look.”

  “What do you mean? I thought Mike knew you were moving.”

  “He does. I just don’t want to be there when he comes home, okay? I need a fucking break!”

  “Fine. Then where are we going?”

  “I don’t know. Just drive.”

  Gary drove until the sun set then pulled his car into the parking lot of a hotel in the town of Falmouth. “I’ll get us a room for the night. We can decide in the morning what you want to do from there,” Gary said, exiting the car and heading into the manager’s office.

  Gary bought fast-food for dinner and alcohol to wash it all down. While they ate, Annie unburdened her soul. The more she drank, the less it all made sense to Gary.

  The next day Gary reluctantly helped Annie board a passenger ferry in Woods Hole headed for the island of Martha’s Vineyard. Annie made him take a vow of secrecy about her final destination and in return, she promised to contact him as soon as she was settled in safely, but Annie never called.

  Michael was on his way t
o a photo-shoot when he got the urgent call from Bonita. Somehow he knew before he even said hello, that something was dreadfully wrong.

  “What do you mean, she’s gone? She wasn’t supposed to move until the end of the week!” he hissed into the phone.

  “I came back from town and her things are missing. I’m sorry, Mr. Michael. I tried my best!”

  “Calm down, Bonita. Tell me what’s missing.”

  “All her private things, you know, make-up, clothes, things like that. It’s all gone; except for her cell phone!”

  “She didn’t take her phone?”

  “No, she left the phone in the kitchen.”

  “Did she leave a note?” he asked.

  “No note. Do you want me to call the police?”

  “Shit no! I’ll call her apartment and see what’s going on. I’m sure it’s nothing more than her moving out a few days early.”

  “I’m so sorry, Mr. Michael. It is all my fault.”

  “No it isn’t, Bonita. Call me if you hear from her.”

  Michael hung up the phone and swore loudly. Quickly he dialed her old phone number only to be told by the operator that the number was no longer in service. He had no way to contact her and his heart sank. His first reaction was to book a flight back to Boston and track her down himself. But with the volume of tour dates they had scheduled, that option was clearly out of the question. She had promised him she would take care of everything and already the detail of reinstating her house phone had been neglected. Now, he was stuck on the West Coast, hands tied, while she remained missing.

  The next person he tried to contact was Gary, and he left a message on his answering machine, then he called the other guys from her band. No one knew Annie was even gone. After three unanswered phone messages to Gary, he began to fear the worst. Bull suggested hiring a private investigator but Michael shrugged it off, believing Annie would appear on her own and explain everything.

  When a week went by with no word from Annie, Michael knew she was gone for good. Gary had finally called and left a rambling message on Michael’s cell phone saying he had been away for a few days and that he had no idea where Annie was.

  Brian tried relentlessly to console Michael’s wounded heart and ego but his efforts were in vain. Once again, Michael built a wall around himself to hide behind. He went about his job like a robot, smiling only when he had to, and performing on stage when the lights hit his face, but when the crowds left and the lights went out, he sought the privacy and seclusion of his hotel room.