by Lauren Wood
“I wanted to ask how your friend is doing, but I don’t know if that would be a problem or not.”
“Not at all. I was wondering when you would. Do you care for her like you say you do?”
“I love her Anna, that’s all I know. She took something out of context and thinks that I did something that I didn’t.”
“Well have you tried to explain yourself?”
“She won’t answer my calls.”
“When is the last time that you called her?”
It had bene a while. I got sick of hearing the phone ring and ring, followed by the automated voice that tells me to leave a message. There was no point. She never called me back, so why leave one?
“I don’t know. It’s been a while.”
“You should give her a call Cal and see what’s going on. I think she’s had enough time to get over all of it.”
“Did you?”
“Yes, but if he ever does it again, I’m going to dickpunch him.”
I didn’t know if that was a thing, but she had me convinced. I’m sure that she had Jesse convinced as well.
When I left out of there with Jesse, all I could think about was her suggestion to call Mariss. Did she know something that I didn’t?
***
“So how did that go?”
“Better than I thought. I still can’t believe she forgave you.”
“You don’t sound happy.”
“I’m am. You’re a damn mess without her, but I just wish that Mariss was as forgiving. I didn’t even do anything, and she won’t even talk to me. It’s a damn shame and your forgiven? The world is fucked up.”
He just shook his head and looked out the window. “It’s the baby that made her forgive me. You know, that right? It has really nothing more to do with it than that. She wants our child to have a father and I’m going to spend the rest of me life making sure that she doesn’t regret taking me back. She isn’t going to regret it.”
He’d turned a new leaf and I could see that Jesse meant it. I was glad for him. I just needed to pull my own crap away from it.
“Are you guys going to get married?”
Jesse gave me a look. “I’m not bringing that up and if we do, I swear to you we are going to elope far away where no one knows us.”
I had to chuckle a little because he was so serious. The last wedding had been a disaster. I didn’t blame him a bit.
“I think I need to make a call after this meeting. Break soon?”
He agreed, and we went into the building, trying to pretend that the meeting we were about to have wasn’t going to make or break our business.
Chapter 22
Mariss
“Why don’t you come down for a little while? It’s not like you have work to do.”
The offer came out of the blue and I had to wonder why she wanted me to come see her right now. I was supposed to go see her next week, but she was upping the timeline.
“I do have a job that I’m finishing up.”
“Well finish up and come on. I want to pick out some baby stuff. I still think that you should just move out here. Come back home.”
“Why are you acting weird?”
“I’m not. I’m just emotional and I want my pregnant friend here to talk to. Jesse doesn’t get it. He’s a man and all he does is apologize a lot.”
“About what?”
“Everything.” She laughed. “He has taken it to heart when I hurt, like it’s his fault.”
“It wouldn’t hurt him to grovel for a while.”
“I agree wholeheartedly. I’ve never had such good massages before. He has magical hands.”
“I would be getting more than a damn massage if I were you.”
“You don’t think I should have forgiven him, huh?”
“I just don’t want him to hurt you again. I didn’t think you were going to and just because you guys have a kid together, doesn’t mean that you have to be together.”
“Are you talking about me or you?”
I sighed into the phone. “I guess a little of both.”
“So, when are you going to deal with it.”
“Next week I thought.”
“A week seems like forever.”
“Give me a couple of days.”
She sounded victorious, but I did have a job that was about over and nothing on the near horizon. I missed her too and there were some things that I wanted to talk to her about, things that I didn’t know if others not in our situation would understand.
“So, you’re coming?”
“Yeah, but I don’t want to see Cal. Can you make sure that he isn’t around?”
She said that she would, but for one reason or another, I really didn’t trust her when she said that. I felt like she was being sneaky, and it was never good when Anna was sneaky or did something because she thought it would be in my best interest. What it did was make me nervous, but I was ready to get out of here and go back. I didn’t want to stay, I just wanted to visit for a little while and it would be nice to do some shopping. I still had no idea about this motherhood thing and I wanted all the help I could get. It would be good to talk to Anna because we were going through the same thing and I had so many things that I was just so unsure of.
I got off the phone with her and it rang again. I thought it was Anna calling back because she had forgotten something. She did that a lot lately and we blamed it on the baby hormones because I was getting it too. It was like baby brain and it was turning to mush.
“I told you it was going to be a couple of days.”
“What is going to be a couple of days?”
“Cal?”
“Yeah, I’ve been trying to call you.”
“I know. I don’t really want to talk to you.”
“Why did you answer then?”
“I didn’t look, and I thought you were someone else.”
“Who did you think I was?”
He sounded almost jealous and I don’t know what in the world he was thinking. He had no right to be mad at me or ask me questions about who or what I was doing.
“None of your business Cal. Is there a reason that you called or are you just trying to be nosy?”
“I wanted to talk to you. It’s been a while.”
“Yeah, but you move on quickly from what I’ve heard so I’m sure you will be okay. Nothing has changed Cal, your reputation proceeds you.”
“That’s not fair.”
“Why not? It wasn’t even a week and you were with some girl and god only knows where.”
“There was a girl around, but she wasn’t for me. I didn’t and haven’t been with anyone else but you since we were together at Anna’s place.”
I wanted to believe him, really, I did, but at the same time I wasn’t sure if I should. He’d cheated on Marsha with me and for some reason, that just made me think that there was no way that he was going to be faithful or that he could be. There was a saying that if a man cheated with you, he would eventually cheat on me.
“I don’t know what you want Cal. You’re there and I’m here.”
“I can change that. I can be there in a couple of hours. I think we have a lot to talk about. Just tell me where you are, and I will be there as soon as I can.”
I believed that. I believed that he would come to me, but it wasn’t necessary. I was going to be there in a couple of days and he was just going to have to wait.
“I should be around that way by the end of the week. We can meet up then if you want. I don’t know when, but I’ll call you to set something up.”
He didn’t like my answer all that well, but that’s all he was getting from me. I didn’t want to argue about it anymore. I would see him soon and the prospect of it scared the crap out of me.
“Are you sure you want to wait? I can be there in a couple of hours.”
Cal sounded like he wanted some sort of sexual favors and I wasn’t sure what to say. My mind was there as well, but I knew better. I knew what happened when he ha
d his mind on that. It made me unable to think and the next thing I knew, I was in trouble because I was naked, and he was inside of me. Sometimes I believed that was where he was supposed to be.
“I’m not in that big of a rush, are you?”
“Yes.”
I giggled before I could stop myself. I liked when he was like this. It made me feel like I had a little bit of power, even if it wasn’t all that much. I was going to use it to my advantage.
“You’ll have to wait.”
He growled at me and the sound made me think of other times that he had done it and it made me shiver. I told him that he had to wait, but I seemed to forget that it meant that I had to wait as well.
“What if I don’t want to wait?”
“You don’t have a choice. I will be up that way soon and then we will see what happens. That’s all I can say.”
I hung up after he wouldn’t stop with the innuendos. He was making me horny, a state I was apparently in easier now that I was pregnant. I wasn’t showing enough so that he would notice, and I wasn’t prepared to go through with it. I know that I’d agreed to meet with him, but minutes later I was half a mind to call it all off. I don’t know if I will be able to face him. He still had a power over me and what if when I tell him I’m pregnant he gets mad and wants to have nothing to do with either one of us? Just because it worked out for Jesse and Anna, didn’t mean that it was going to work out for us.
Trying not to worry about it all too much, I spent the rest of my time at home getting the job done that was already paid for. I turned down another so that I could go see Anna. I was also excited to see Cal again, even if it was all a mess. I shouldn’t, didn’t want to, but there it was for all to see.
***
I was practically giddy when I was getting on the plane. I knew where I was going and for once, I felt like I was going to get answers. I was still afraid of what those answers might be, but I was willing to at least try and be optimistic about it all. I wanted to think that everything was going to be okay, even though I really wasn’t sure if it was or not.
Somehow, I was able to take a nap while we were in the air and when I woke up, I was at my destination. The town was beneath me and I called Anna when I got off the tarmac.
“I’ can’t come right now, but I’m going to send someone to pick you up. Something came up.”
I thought about what happened the last time that she’d done that, and I wanted to make sure that this wasn’t going to be like that. She assured me that it was a friend of hers. She didn’t get into details and I didn’t specifically ask if it was Cal she was sending. If it wasn’t, I didn’t want to seem like I was talking about him all the time, even if it was true.
“Just hold tight. They’re already on their way and will be there soon.”
I got off the phone with Anna feeling the same way that I did before. She was up to something and I just wished I knew what it was. I didn’t like being in the dark and that was exactly how I felt now. I felt like I was in the dark big time.
Going outside, I waited for the friend of hers and I sighed loudly when I saw who it was. She’d totally just set me up.
Chapter 23
Cal
“You don’t seem so happy to see me Mariss.”
“I can’t say that I am Cal. I thought someone else was picking me up, so I wasn’t expecting it to be you. Anna must think she’s being funny.”
“Don’t get mad at Anna. I insisted and you know how insistent I can be.”
She scowled at the reminder and I chuckled in response to hers.
I could tell she wasn’t expecting me, even though Anna had said that she was. I should have known better. I really should have. Anna was up to something and I was starting to see that she was trying to get us back together. I couldn’t fault her for that. I wanted the same thing. I don’t know when she had come over to my side, but I’m glad she did. With Mariss, I was going to need all the help I could get.
“Get in. You can pout on the way to her house.”
She told me that she wasn’t pouting, but to me it looked like she was. I didn’t want to piss her off, but that wasn’t too hard to do.
“You look different Mariss. Something is definitely different with you, but I just can’t seem to put my finger on it.”
“I don’t know what’s different.”
“Do I not get a hug?”
We were by the truck and I opened the door for her. She told me that I didn’t get one and I had to hold back. She was so supple, I wanted to put my hands around her, but she was making it clear that she didn’t want that. I moved back and closed the door after she was in, taking a deep breath before I walked to the driver side and got in. This wasn’t going how I thought it would in my head.
There was silence between us for several minutes before a car in front of us stopped suddenly and I had to put the brakes on. One of Mariss’ hands went to her stomach and the other one went to the dashboard to steady herself. It was the first move that had me looking.
She didn’t say anything as we started back up, but I made it a point to not get too close to anyone again. I wanted to know why she did that and when I looked her way, she was looking out the window. I don’t think babies would have even been on my mind if it wasn’t for Jesse getting Anna knocked up. I was looking at Mariss’ stomach now, trying to figure out if there was a bump there. I don’t know if there was or not. She was wearing baggy clothes and that in and of itself for strange for her. She’d never been one that dressed all that modestly. I was perturbed and unsure how this was all supposed to be. Should I just come right out and ask?
“How have you been Mariss?”
“Alright.”
“I wanted to talk to you about that time that you called. The last time we talked.”
“There is nothing to talk about. You told me what happened, and I believe you.”
“You do?” That was surprising because she wasn’t acting like everything was okay between us.
“Of course. It’s no big deal. I don’t want to argue with you and stay mad. I just don’t.”
As happy as I was to hear that, I still felt like she wasn’t being one hundred percent truthful. Something was still between us and I had no idea what.
“Then why did I not get a hug or kiss when we got in? There is something off about you lately.”
“Off?”
“Yeah, I don’t know what it is, but something is different.”
Mariss told me that everything was fine. I didn’t want to push it, but it bothered me that she wouldn’t tell me what it was. I knew that there was something going on because of the way it felt between us. There was a tension so thick in the air that I could taste in on my tongue. I didn’t like the taste of it. I wanted us back to the way that we were before.
The whole way back she didn’t say much of anything. I didn’t say anything else because I kept getting shot down. It was starting to get to me, but then we were back at Anna’s and I had places to go with Jesse. We had work to do and as I’d taken the morning off to meet Marissa, it wasn’t how I had imagined it in my head at all. It hadn’t turned out at all and Mariss wasn’t even looking back. She left the bag in the car though and I grabbed it to have an excuse to see her. I was still trying to find out when she wanted to meet.
My hope was still on the fact that she wanted to at all. At the moment it didn’t seem like she was willing to talk to me at all. Why did I really think this would be easy, that she would fall into my arms and that would be that? It had happened with many other women when I pissed them off, but I hadn’t cared of the outcome. This time around, it meant a lot how it all turned out.
I’d already lost Mariss once before and this time I was even more invested and the last time I’d been devastated.
“Here Mariss. I wanted to ask you about us going out. You said that we’d hook up while you were here and talk?”
I hated the sound of my voice and I wanted to take it all back. Was this worth it if sh
e was going to just keep ignoring me? I’d never begged a chick to go out with me and it was leaving a horrible bitter taste in my mouth. I wasn’t going to be able to keep it up long.
“I said we would see each other.”
“And now isn’t good?”
“No, it’s really not. Maybe tomorrow if that works for you.”
I told her that it did work, and I wasn’t going to push it any further. There was something going on in that mind of hers and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to know what it was or not. She was still pissed off about something and I was going to find out what it was.
Jesse asked me if I was ready to go and I told him that I was. It wasn’t doing me no damn good to be here, so I might as well go get some work done. At least that wouldn’t turn into a mess like this had.
We got into the truck and Jesse asked how it went. If it had gone well, we’d have been at my house right now getting sweaty. That hadn’t happened, and I had a good idea that it wouldn’t happen. Not in the foreseeable future. I had to figure out what was going on about and how I was going to be able to fix it.
“It didn’t go well at all. I thought that she was thinking along the same lines as me, but I guess not. Instead she was cold and not happy to see me at all.”
“You don’t want to know how cold Anna was with me. She was ice cold, but there really wasn’t anything I could do but keep moving and trying. Eventually I got to her. I told you how.”
That got me thinking about my suspicions and I wanted to ask Jesse about it. If Mariss was pregnant, that meant that Anna and most likely Jesse would know about it. Was I ready to ask that sort of question? Because I wasn’t sure if I was ready for the answer of it. It didn’t seem like it would be one that I would want to know. I’d never even thought about it before and it was strange to now.
“So, have you noticed anything different about Mariss?”
“No, why?”
“I don’t know, she just seemed different. She’s changed.”
“She’ll come around. You must stop worrying about it. She’s here for a few weeks to help Anna pick some stuff out for the baby. I’m sure that you will get her to see things your way soon enough. You must have faith. I didn’t think that me and Anna would ever get back together, but here we are. You just have to be positive.”