The Blackbird

by Kristy McCaffrey

  She was greatly relieved when she was able to wean back on the laudanum, the pain finally manageable. The splint left red marks, and her skin itched fiercely, but deep down, she felt that her leg was healing. It felt better and more whole with each passing day.

  Cale fashioned crutches for her so she was able to move about on her own, and she enjoyed the increased mobility. Sometimes she would take Amado’s cage to the creek and sit with the bird, waiting for Cale to return from a hunting or scouting trip, always anticipating seeing him again.

  At night she frequently dreamt of him, and of kisses and more. She'd awake, wanting him, knowing he was just in the next room, sleeping on the floor as he had every night. All she had to do was call out and ask him to come to her, to hold her, to make love to her.

  He’d been very respectful, but they weren’t alone often, except at night.

  The first move was hers to make, but within the sheltered embrace of the dark hours before dawn, she always hesitated.

  What if she froze, or worse, became crazed like a wild animal caught in the grip of terror?

  She couldn’t seem to shake the thought. She didn’t want to disappoint Cale or embarrass herself.

  Using just one crutch, she moved to the side of the house. Vern had disappeared into the mountains two days ago. He didn’t say why, but Cale thought he hunted gold. Tess marveled that he trusted both her and Cale after such a short time, but Vern had been blunt.

  “My animal's like you,” he'd said. “That's good enough for me. Nitis and Smita won’t bother you none if you don’t bother them.”

  She checked on the small garden—corn, squash, carrots, potatoes and more. Smita took good care of it with her daily ministrations. Tess lowered herself to the ground to dig up a few turnips for a stew she planned to make. With any luck, Cale would acquire rabbit meat. He should return soon.

  Amado squawked from around the corner, where she sat in her cage on the porch. Tess looked around, a wisp of black hair wavering in front of her face. She returned to digging up the root with a small shovel, but the bird shrieked again.

  Tension filled Tess. She rose, grabbed the crutch, and hobbled to the porch.

  She froze.

  A coyote stood twenty feet away. The animal was obviously here for Amado. No wonder the bird was going crazy.

  The coyote’s thin body and disheveled tan and white fur indicated his need for food. His yellowed eyes never wavered, and fear settled in Tess's bones, an old friend she knew well. But she stood her ground.

  The coyote finally ended the showdown, turned and departed.

  Tess savored the victory, feeling empowered. She picked up the blackbird's cage and unsteadily went inside the cabin. Should Coyote change his mind, she wanted the bird safely out of reach.

  A horse approached, and immediately she sensed something was off. She closed the door and watched through the window as a rider appeared.

  Not Cale.

  The man slowed his mount and stopped before the house.

  Fear and disbelief jolted through her.

  Saul Miller.

  Tess jerked herself from the window.

  Squeezing her eyes shut, she frantically sought an explanation. Maybe she was wrong. Lange said he was dead. She must’ve imagined seeing him just now.

  Carefully, she looked again. In a flash, she took in the man’s thick build, beady eyes, and pock-marked face.

  It’s him.

  Bracing her back against the door and leaning heavily on the crutch, she prayed he hadn't seen her.

  Footsteps sounded on the porch. A pounding on the door rattled Tess clear to her teeth.

  “Vern, you in there?”

  She held her breath, willing herself into invisibility.

  More pounding. After a long pause, Miller swore under his breath, but then stomped away. The sound of his horse departing had her sucking in gulps of air.

  For a long time, she didn’t move as her mind reeled and her body trembled.

  Finally, she let herself sink to the floor as desperate sobs poured from her.

  * * * *

  Cale found Tess asleep under the bed. He’d been nearly frantic searching for her, especially when he’d found one of her crutches askew in the bedroom but no sign of her.

  Relief flooded him, but he immediately knew that the progress she’d made in the past two weeks while living peacefully in Vern’s house had taken a serious step back. She was crammed back as far as she could go beneath the low wooden and rope frame, and behind the acrid chamber pot—her face puffy and tear-streaked.

  “Tess.” Gently he reached for her and she stirred. “Sweetheart, what are you doing under here?” He pushed the pot out of the way and pulled her out, careful of her splinted leg, then settled her onto the edge of the bed. Her brown blouse and checkered skirt were streaked with dust, and her black hair tumbled across her shoulders, having come free from its braid.

  Dazed, she wiped at her face and glanced around.

  “Why are you under the bed?”

  Her eyes met his and tears began to form anew. “I saw Saul.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “He’s definitely alive. I saw him, here.”

  “Are you certain?”

  She nodded. “At first I thought I was mistaken, but I wasn’t. I looked again. It was him.” She stopped to catch her breath. “Do you believe me?”

  “Of course I do. I have to admit, I didn’t entirely take Lange at his word. But why would Saul come here?”

  “He was looking for Vern. When no one answered the door, he left.”

  Each day, Cale scouted and hunted, but not far. He’d seen signs of Apache, but nothing of Hank, or Lange for that matter. And now, it seemed Saul was trolling as well. Odd, that they’d all be in the same area at the same time, but apparently not together. Was Miller searching for Hank too?

  “You’re certain he didn’t see you?” he asked.

  “Sí.”

  Cale drew Tess against him with his right arm. He buried his fingers into her hair and kissed her forehead. She wrapped her arms around him.

  “When was he here?”

  “Earlier today.”

  If he left now, he could track Miller. He could capture him and haul him back to Tucson to stand trial for killing Jim Bennett and assaulting Tess. But knowing that she’d likely have to recount the attack in detail, he entertained the thought of simply killing Saul and leaving his carcass for the vultures. Then Tess could walk away from her painful past once and for all. But that would make Cale nothing better than what Saul had become—a vigilante bully.

  Tess lifted her face to his. “What’s wrong? Are you going to go after him?”

  “I’m thinkin’ about it.”

  “Then I’ll go with you.”

  “You can’t. Your leg isn’t healed yet.”

  “It’s getting better every day. I think we can remove the splint.”

  He kissed her, keeping himself in check, as he had for the past two weeks. He’d come to appreciate the anticipation of waiting, of exploring his need for her with just his mouth against hers.

  “You want me to stay here, don’t you?” she asked.

  He leaned his forehead to hers. “No. I don’t think you’re any safer here than you’d be with me. There aren’t any Apache in the immediate vicinity, and my feeling is that the attack on us before had more to do with One Ear than us. But I don’t want to put you through any more pain, Tess.”

  “Then help me take off the splint and let’s see how I do.”

  Chapter Twenty

  Removing the splint filled Tess with relief. She scratched and rubbed the skin she hadn’t had access to since Vern tied the contraption to her leg. Cale stepped from the bedroom to deposit the wood outside, then returned to where she sat upon the bed, her skirt hiked up so she could examine the results in the lantern light.

  He settled near the end of the bed. “Easy on the itching.”

  Frustrated, she planted both palms besid
e her on the bedcovers.

  He placed his hands on her knee and upper thigh. Her breath became shallow as his touch triggered gooseflesh, and not just on her leg.

  It was night, and they were alone, more alone than usual. Vern was gone, not likely to return soon, and the Apache couple never came to the cabin.

  Tess’s mouth went dry.

  She diverted her attention to the injury that she prayed was better-healed than previously, rather than focus on Cale’s very masculine and compelling presence.

  She took a fortifying inhalation.

  Cale’s gaze came to hers, dark with longing, and she forgot to finish the breath, then it came out in a rush.

  “It doesn’t look bad,” he said quietly. “How does it feel?”

  “It feels good.”

  She didn’t look away, and knew he understood her meaning.

  “Are you sure?” he asked.

  Her heart thundered in her chest. “I hope you won’t be disappointed.”

  “There’s no chance of that.” He moved closer. “Do you want to walk on your leg first?”

  “I can do it after.”

  A smile tugged at his mouth, and he gently pushed strands of hair from her face.

  He captured her mouth, and she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him closer. His tongue swept her mouth, and she clung to him. Kissing him was familiar to her now, but no less exciting. Molded against her, she felt the need from him, the desire he’d held in check, and it ignited her own.

  She didn’t want to fear this, and after the exhaustion that had followed the terror of seeing Saul, she wanted nothing more than to feel pleasure, to feel alive. And she wanted it with Cale.

  In a flash the kissing became feverish, and Cale pushed her back onto the bed and stretched out beside her. His lips devoured hers with a hunger that had her arching against him, and his arousal pressed against her hip. His hand moved down, skimming a breast then settling upon it, setting her body to humming with need.

  He moved over her and kissed her neck, then lower. She tugged at his shirt, and he drew it over his head. She unbuttoned her blouse and he helped ease it from her. Standing, he tugged her skirt down her legs, then aided the removal of the chemise. All that remained was her drawers.

  Still standing, he yanked his boots off by balancing on each leg in turn, then shed his trousers. They hadn’t doused the lantern, and for a moment Tess wondered if she appeared as a lady ought while spread almost naked before the man she was about to love.

  She tried not to stare at the muscles and contours of Cale’s lean body, at the injuries that marked his flesh. They only made him more beautiful, and she hoped he would see her the same way. He knelt at the bottom of the bed, slipped his fingers around the edge of the drawers at her hip and slid them slowly from her, baring her completely to him.

  Leaning down, his lips kissed a trail along her injured leg, not hesitating on the indentations where flesh was permanently missing. His hands slid along her hips, and his mouth worked its way to her abdomen, then covered a breast.

  Tess closed her eyes, lost to the sensations. She had no idea it could feel this way, and the building momentum had her wanting more.

  Cale’s lips returned to her mouth, and he covered her body, his arousal nestled against her. Bracing his arms on either side of her head, Cale kissed her neck, her chin, then her cheek. Gently, he rocked against her, and she shifted her legs to allow him better access. He lifted his hips slightly and pressed against her, then hesitated.

  She opened herself more, giving him permission to continue. He began to push into her, but suddenly she froze, memories returning, of another time, of an act that held no affection or wanting.

  Cale raised his head to look at her. “Tess, it’s all right.”

  She chewed on her lower lip and closed her eyes. “Lo siento.”

  His lips softly caressed hers, and he didn’t press on, but remained where he was. “There are other ways to do this.”

  “What do you mean?” She dared to look at him, wishing beyond all wishes that she could be the type of woman to find complete and utter satisfaction in Cale’s arms. Surely he’d had women who responded with abandonment for him.

  “I don’t have to be inside you for you to enjoy it.”

  “Is that good for you?”

  A low chuckle rumbled from his chest. “This isn’t all about me.” He shifted so he wasn’t atop her anymore and reached to the nightstand to turn off the lantern.

  His mouth nuzzled her cheek and ear as his left hand moved from breast to stomach and farther. Using his fingers, he stroked her and she gasped. Less inhibited in the dark, all thoughts slid from her mind and she lived only with the responses he drew from her with each caress. As she succumbed to his ministrations, his mouth covered hers, and she gripped his neck and shoulder as she bucked against him.

  He released her mouth as she gasped for breath. As she crested downward from the peak, she could hardly believe what had just coursed through her body.

  “Maravilloso,” she whispered. “But what about you?”

  “I’ll be fine. I just need to think of something other than your maravilloso body.” He molded himself to her as he lay beside her.

  She kissed him with wild abandon, wanting to give him what he’d given her.

  “Tess,” he said against her mouth, “there’s only so much I can do to hold back.”

  “Then don’t. It’s alright. Please try again.” She kissed him again before he could talk and tugged him atop her. This time she opened her legs wider and met him.

  He slid inside in one push. She could feel the length of him, and it stirred more pleasure in her, a deeper connection than only physical satisfaction. She’d missed something important by not fully joining with him before.

  He moved against her, stroking her in an entirely different way than before, and she sensed him holding back. She clenched her legs around him and gave herself to the darkness, to the raw need of the moment, feeling hungry and desperate for everything he offered with his body. His mouth crushed hers, and she crested again as he held her so tight against him, his need for her stunning her clear down to her toes.

  Tears spilled down her cheeks, and she clung to him as his body slowly released the tension that had gripped him. His mouth tasted hers, lingering, and he brought a thumb to her cheek to brush the tears away.

  “I never knew it could be that way,” she said.

  “Neither did I.”

  * * * *

  Tess stirred during the night in Cale’s arms. She was still naked, her backside nestled against him. His arms cocooned her from behind. His lips nuzzled her neck, and she gripped his forearm as his other hand explored her breasts, her stomach, her hips, then came to rest between her legs. And, again, he built a fire within her, making her wild with a frenzied need she never knew existed in her own body.

  He didn’t enter her again, but instead worshiped her with his hands. And within this heated exchange, she felt wanton and sensual, and utterly relieved that Cale desired her, not just a little but with a relentless need evident with every touch, every caress, every groan that escaped his lips. He could barely keep his hands from her, awakening a deeply feminine response in her.

  She wanted to return the favor.

  She rolled over to face him and kissed his mouth with little care for niceties. Ravenous and cloaked in the intimacy of darkness, she dared to touch him as he had her. His shoulder muscles clenched in response, and she guided him to the warmth of her body. He moved atop her and entered in one thrust, then continued the ancient rhythm, and all Tess knew was the sensation of wanting Cale and him wanting her. Nothing else mattered.

  They slept again. Tess opened her eyes to the faint first rays of dawn illuminating the cabin. Cale slumbered beside her, his hand resting on her hip as she lay on her back. The musky scent of their lovemaking mixed with her contentment, and she savored the moment, hopeful that the terrors of the past would slide away for good.

&n
bsp; But there was one more thing she needed to know.

  My leg.

  Cale had distracted her so thoroughly that once he had her naked, she’d never left him, or the bed. There’d been twinges in her leg, but nothing that caused her outright pain.

  She slipped from under Cale’s hand and sat at the edge of the bed. A bulge still remained on her left knee, but even now she was able to bend it.

  Bueno.

  Her gaze shifted to her nudity, her body flush from the night’s loving and her dark hair cascading down her arms, and a sense of deep satisfaction settled into her bones. She leaned down and retrieved the chemise from the floor and pulled it on.

  Steadying herself, she expelled a breath and stood in one fluid motion, her weight on the stronger right leg. Very gingerly she shifted so more and more pressure transferred to the left. Stiff and sore, but it held. No sharp pains, just an overall achiness in the muscles and bones and tendons around the knee.

  She opened her eyes and walked from the bedroom. In the outer room, her eyes landed on Amado’s cage. The bird watched her.

  In the past two weeks, Amado’s wing had gotten better as well. While it would never be perfect, Tess knew it was time to let her go, to give her a chance to test her recovery. She went to the metal structure, lifted it, and slowly carried it to the front porch. She set it upon the chair Cale frequently sat on, unhooked the door and swung it open, then stepped back.

  “Godspeed, Amado.”

  The blackbird hopped to the rim of the exit and paused. Tess understood. While the desire of freedom always persisted, the moment of release brought hesitation. Was this liberation real? Could it be trusted?

  “Vamos, ahora,” Tess said into the softness of the early-morning haze.

  Amado spread her wings, and flew. Landing on the edge of the corral, she cocked her head back and forth, as if looking back at Tess.