Don't Wake Me if I'm Dreaming

by J. E. Chaney

  I walked back into the kitchen to grab my cellphone from my handbag, intending to call him, and noticed him on the back deck. I walked to the sliding glass door. Instantly, I elected to stand inside, moving to the side of the refrigerator, hiding, with my mouth covered to keep from laughing.

  Jack was sorting through the light dusting of snow, stuffing chunks of the poorly disassembled hot tub cover into a garbage sack and didn’t look the least bit pleased.

  I leaned, looking to the yard for the dog, which noticed my movement and barked. I fled running across the kitchen as the door slid opened. I held still, not making a sound, hoping Jack didn’t notice me pressed against the wall.

  “Not so fast, Cinderella! He’s your dog now, too. Grab me another trash bag, please.”

  I turned, with a puckered face looking at Jack, who was shaking his head.

  “You didn’t really plan to leave did you?” He held his mouth open with a partially surprised smile. “Unbelievable!”

  My head sloped down as I tried speaking with discretion. “I told you a dog was a bad idea, did you listen?”

  His eyes narrowed slightly.

  “When will you ever learn the woman is always correct?” I pinched a smirk waiting for his remark.

  “Really. And can you back your words?” He darted after me, chasing me to the stairway.

  “The dog backed my words,” I yelled hysterically laughing.

  With a swift movement, he caught hold of me and tossed me over his shoulder.

  “You’re messing up my hair.” I laughed, trying to wiggle free as he carried me out the back door.

  “The woman is always what?” he asked, dangling my legs over the hot tub. “Try the man is always correct!”

  “Don’t you dare,” I warned, with zero authority.

  “Say it and I’ll give you quarter,” he playfully said, lowering my stiletto boots inches from the water. “The man is always correct, say it!”

  I contemplated briefly. “The man is always correct.” I curled my legs up behind me. “That doesn’t even sound right you barbarian!” I reached, smacking on his butt.

  “Your foolish bravery almost cost your Louie Votton boots a near drowning.”

  “His name is Louis Vuitton, and I’m wearing Prada. Learn your leathers, Jackson.”

  “Learn my leather, pssh.” He shook his head, setting me down in the snow.

  “Do you have any idea how much I love you for not getting my boots wet?”

  “Hopefully more than you love your boots. I’m not sure what I’m going to do with that damn dog.” His brows ruffled as he straightened out his coat. “I just need to crate him while I’m working I suppose.”

  “Good luck with that. It’ll make him depressed.”

  “I’m not sure what else to do with him. I don’t want him destroying the house and that damn cover won’t be cheap to replace.”

  “Well, leaving him outside with a dog house clearly didn’t work either. Doggy day care?” I suggested. “I have a co-worker that drops her dog off and picks him up as if he were a child.”

  “I’ll disregard your suggestion as sick humor. Have you seen the deck? That was a ten by ten hot tub cover that’s now in a hundred, ten-inch chunks.”

  “At least you’re not lonely, anymore.” I pulled my coat over my mouth hiding my face.

  He shook his head, with a crooked smile. “I’ll lock him in the bathroom for now. Come on boy, get inside.” Jack handed me the garbage bag. “Can you please run that into the garage? I need to dry him off and lock him up.”

  “This. Should. Be. Interesting!” I spoke indistinctly.

  ***

  Jack drove us across town, but wouldn’t tell me where we were going. He held my attention on the topic of how to best deal with Barkley until he pulled along a curb. He placed his hand on my thigh and gently squeezed. “Here we are,” he said, sounding cheerful.

  The car was parked on a lane lined with snow-capped trees. Twinkle lights barely shone through the snow and the sidewalks were thick and white. It reminded me of a well-designed scene from a holiday film. I noticed Jack had flashed his headlights, and then got out of the car and walked to my door to help me out.

  Set back from the road, stood a historical church constructed of stonework with a tall canopy shelter in the parking lot.

  We heard the jingling of small bells and the tapping of shod-hooves on the pavement, as two Clydesdale horses pulled a covered buggy from the canopy.

  “Jack, look! Oh my goodness!” My eyes filled with delight.

  “I am.” His eyes gleamed.

  “I am Melvin, and these fellas are Maximus and Meridius.” The short old man sat at the front of the buggy tipping his tall hat to say hello.

  “Hello. Maximus and Meridius.” I walked closer to a horse holding out my hand. “May I pet them?” I asked.

  “Move slowly now, and hold your hand low. They’re social fellas, but get a wee bit antsy when bridled.” Melvin explained.

  Steam blew from the horse’s nostrils into the cold air as his marbled eye reflected a street light. “Hi there, handsome.”

  The horse breathed heavily against my hand, pressing his nose into it.

  “You’re friendly aren’t you?” I reached slowly, rubbing his neck.

  “Would you like to go for a ride?” Jack approached my side, letting the horse smell his hand.

  We climbed into the enclosed buggy and covered up with the provided blanket then headed down the lane. Jack reached his arm around me and held me snug to his side as we watched the snowflakes drift through the breezy air.

  “Did you plan this?” I asked.

  “I sure did. I hope it’s not too cold for you.”

  “I’m bundled well enough. I’ve never ridden in a buggy, or on a horse.”

  Jack smiled, likely already knowing that.

  “Have you been to the Duke?” Melvin asked, pointing to a driveway.

  “I haven’t.” I shook my head looking at Jack, unsure what that meant.

  “It’s here on the left. The gates are probably closed for the night, but it’s worth visiting during the day.” Melvin pointed. “The mansion was built in nineteen-fifteen by a man named James Duke. He was known as the inventor of modern cigarette manufacturing. Quite a history there.”

  “I would imagine.” I tried looking down the lane, but the tall Wrought Iron gates leading to a driveway were closed for the evening. “Bummer. Do they do tours there?” I asked.

  “Yes, a great deal of events takes place there. It’s open to the public for a fee,” Melvin said.

  “We should check it out sometime,” Jack suggested.

  After circling a couple blocks, we pulled back in front of a church. Jack helped me from the buggy.

  “Goodnight, folks. It’s time for me to get these old lads home.”

  “Thank you for the ride.” I gave Jack a hug and kiss after he helped me from the buggy. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too. Take my arm. The stairs might be slick.”

  I stopped at the doors and reached, pressing my hand against the wood in thought. I wondered why I hadn’t dreamt of this moment.

  “Is everything all right?” he asked.

  “Uh huh.”

  Warmth burst through the door as Jack pulled it open. Inside, I looked around at all the floor to ceiling stained glass windows.

  “Have you attended Mass here?” I asked.

  “No,” he admitted. “I haven’t attended church in far too long.” He slid his hands into his pockets walking up the aisle.

  A tall wooden cross stood at the head of the well-preserved building.

  I sat next to Jack in the front pew.

  “Are we the only ones here?” I glanced around.

  “I’m sure the priest is somewhere in the building waiting for those of us needing repentance.”

  “Repentance.” I laughed bitterly.

  He chuckled. “Do you have that many sins in need of confessing?”

 
“Like I said.”

  He smiled at me a moment waiting for a response. “My parents were married here forty-three years ago. My thought is if we marry here on your parent’s anniversary, we will honor both sets of parents.”

  I reached for his hand. “Is it possible you’re not really human, you’re an angel just missing your wings? You are always so— thoughtful.”

  “I want to include your mom in what I hope will be the best day of our lives together.”

  I looked around. I could picture myself in a gown walking down the aisle, and most of all, I could picture Jack standing at the head of the church smiling, waiting to say his vows.

  “Uh, Jack, there’s one small issue. You forgot. I’m not Catholic.”

  He looked down at the floor for a few seconds in thought. “Well, I haven’t attended Mass in… I don’t even remember it’s been that long. Maybe we could have a minister marry here. I think my parents will understand.”

  “As long as you’re okay with it, I am too.”

  “Yeah?” He moved a little in surprise.

  “Yeah.”

  Jack leaned forward, kissing me, sliding his hand on my inner thigh.

  I reached for his coat, pulling us closer together.

  The loud, deep voice of an elderly man intoned, “This is the Lord’s house, not your own.”

  My hand slid to my lips.

  Jack’s hand retracted instantly as he stood.

  A tall, elderly priest approached with a questionable stare.

  I too quickly stood.

  “Father, pardon our moment of celebration. We just decided we’d like to wed here.” Jack explained.

  “Splendid, then congratulations is in order. From what I’ve witnessed, the sooner the nuptials, the better.” The priest shared a flat smile. “The secretary has gone home for the night. You can reach her during business hours for an appointment. For now, may I suggest you both consider confessing your,” he made a displeased face, “sins.”

  Jack and I shared a glance.

  ***

  We were able to hear Barkley howling from the front porch.

  “Huh, he sounds happy.” I smirked.

  “At least there’s nothing he can destroy in the bathroom.”

  “Ha. Fifty dollars says that your optimistic sense is wrong.” I held out my hand to shake on it.

  He smiled smugly. “Shit.”

  I went into the kitchen, grabbing a garbage bag from the larder. I was mid stair when I heard Jack scolding the dog. I stopped and covered my mouth not wanting him to listen to the escaping laughter from my I told you so, thought.

  “This is bad.” I heard Jack lecturing the dog.

  The floor was covered in toilet paper, the hand towels were chewed, and it smelled awful. “What is that smell… Oh!” I covered my mouth handing Jack the trash bag.

  Jack ran his hand over the clawed grooves in the doorframe. “Damn dog.” He moaned.

  “Lucky, you didn’t shake on it.” I left the bathroom smiling. “Have fun!”

  ***

  I wasn’t intending on spending the night, but Jack had talked me in to staying. He was ready to start talking about wedding plans, which ended up carrying on late into the night.

  We eventually headed to bed and I showed interest in more than sleeping, but was interrupted with the moaning and whimpering of Barkley, who felt he too needed on the bed.

  Jack patted the foot of the bed and the dog hopped up.

  “Enabler!” I pointed at Jack.

  I pulled the blankets up to my face as a protective barrier against the slobbery tongue that persistently tried licking me. “I have to admit. I’ve never slept with a dog before.”

  “There’s a first for everything.” Jack laughed, trying to get Barkley to lie down.

  “You realize I’m not about to have sex with a dog in bed next to me.” Just the thought alone was repulsive.

  “Down, boy!” Jack quickly snapped his finger pointing to the floor.

  Undreamt

  A bright light shone in my face. I squinted, trying to focus, allowing my eyes to adjust to the light. My throat was inflamed, raw, and the only feeling I could focus on until I felt hands touch both my arms. I heard a few whispers and a sequence of beeps, and slowly moved my head far enough to see someone standing there, but only saw their silhouette through the bright blur of light. Where am I?

  “Close the blind, it’s too bright in here.” I heard a familiar voice say.

  “Thank you, God.” I then recognized my dad’s voice but was unable to respond. “Don’t try talking. I’ll explain everything.”

  “Shouldn’t you give her a moment?” I heard the same familiar voice, but couldn’t decide to whom it belonged.

  The room was silent a moment except beeping sounds. “I need to tell her, so she doesn’t panic,” My dad said, matter-of-factly. “Sasha, it’s me, your dad. You’re in the hospital. You were in a car accident. You were headed to work and reached down for something and were hit, twice, running a red light. It was really bad. We almost lost you a few times. You’re okay now. Everything is going to be okay,” he tried reassuring me.

  “I’ll call for the nurse.” The familiar woman’s voice said, and then I heard movement and rubber soles walk heavily across the floor, the same sound from the office when Martha wore her rubber shoes to work.

  I was too tired to look that direction. I kept my eyes closed and tried moving my fingers.

  With a gentle touch my dad’s hand wrapped around mine. “It’s okay, hon, just rest,” he said. “I know this is a lot to take in, but you’re going to be fine.”

  I must have been in and out of consciousness for a few minutes until I felt a cold hand touch my other arm. “Sasha, can you hear me?” An unfamiliar woman’s voice asked.

  I moved my fingers.

  “Good. Welcome back,” she said. “I’m Kate, your nurse for the next hour. I’m going to do my best to keep you comfortable. Just lie still.”

  I opened my mouth, trying to say Jack’s name, but my throat felt like it was on fire and painfully dry. My arm was feeble, but I reached up, touching my mouth.

  “Hold on, sweetie,” Kate said. “I’ll get you something to drink.

  A moment later, I felt something wet and fuzzy rub against my lips and the tip of my tongue. I sucked the few drops of water from the medical swab. It was refreshing, but nowhere near quenching.

  “Can someone please grab the cup and straw from the sink and fill it with just cooler than room temperature water?” Kate asked. “Thank you.”

  I listened to the rubber soles move about the room.

  “Here you go.” I heard Martha say to the nurse as she shuffled around the bed.

  A straw poked my lips a moment later. I opened my eyes again, and took a sip.

  “Sip only a tiny amount. I don’t want you choking,” Kate said, holding the straw to my mouth. “Let that settle a moment then you can have another drink.”

  The feeling of water dripping down my throat, I imagined, was comparable to sucking down flames. My hand quickly reached my neck, holding it.

  Kate studied my face setting the cup aide as I stared at her. “The doctor will be in here soon and will go over your medical chart with you. For now, I’ll leave you to catch up with your loved ones.” She rubbed my arm before leaving the room.

  I stared a moment at my dad, then looked around the room realizing Jack was missing. “Jack.” I tried saying his name, but nothing more than a painful breath escaped my mouth.

  “Honey, I don’t know what you’re saying,” my dad said.

  I closed my eyes a moment, resting, and then tapped my ring finger.” Why on earth is Jack not here?

  He took a few seconds deciphering before responding. “He’s in the cafeteria but he should be back any time. He left shortly before you woke.”

  I nodded slightly. I tapped my wrist.

  “What time?” he asked confused. “It’s one-fourteen in the afternoon.”

  I
shook my head no.

  “Time, wrist, bracelet, you know I suck at charades.”

  “How long?” I mimed, looking into his bright blue eyes. He looked as though he hadn’t slept much but was so excited to see me, that his eyes held a twinkle.

  “Oh, how long? Thirteen days. You’ve been here for the past thirteen days in a coma.”

  I turned my head toward the window, noticing Martha.

  “Welcome, kiddo.” She smiled. “I was hoping today would be the day.”

  I held up a thumb thanking her. It was much easier to see now and I noticed she also looked exhausted.

  I heard someone entering the room.

  “Oh man.” Matt hurried to my bed. “Hi, baby.” He kissed my lips. “I can’t believe my eyes!”

  I didn’t respond to him or the kiss. My heartrate jumped into an upswing, scarily increasing the beeping sounds in the room. I stared at my lover in front of me, confused. I tried to breathe deeply to get my heartbeat to slow, and to get the machine to stop beeping wildly, but it was useless.

  Jack. I needed Jack. I closed my eyes, trying to make sense of it all. We were just at church making wedding plans. Had we been in an accident? I couldn’t remember one.

  Opening my eyes, I forced a stare into the loving, but worried gaze of my—dead lover. Nothing made sense. I held my hand up, looking for Jack’s ring, but it wasn’t there. The mixture of emotions I experienced scared me. Too distraught, and drained, I closed my eyes, willing my heartrate to slow while I tried to figure out why Matt was standing in the room. How was he alive? Why was no one other than me fazed by his presence? And where the hell was Jack?

  “You can rest if you’re tired. I will be right here when you wake.”

  I opened my eyes again and stared at him. He looked exactly the way he had when I last saw him alive, only now he had dark circles under his eyes. I closed my eyes again, tighter this time, I was waiting to feel a gust of wind, a change in scenery, but when they opened, Matt just stood with mixed emotions on his face.

  “Are you okay?”

  I nodded my head, closing my eyes, needing a moment to process my thoughts. Matt is alive, I’m in the hospital. I was in a car accident and in a coma, not him. Matt never died.

  My eyes flew open, looking around the room. I saw my handbag sitting on a bench seat next to one of my travel bags. I assumed someone took the liberty of preparing for my return as I pointed to it, silently mouthing “Please.”