Twisted Stars (Hardest Mistakes #3)

by Dannielle Wicks

  I’m completely exhausted by the time I make it home. The house is dark and quiet when I walk into the kitchen. There’s a note taped to the fridge from Sammy, explaining that Kai has picked up the last of their stuff.

  I sigh and close my eyes. This is it. I’m officially alone.

  I crumple up the note and throw it on the counter. The cool night air calls to me. With a sigh, I walk out onto the back porch and relax into my swing chair. The sun is already behind the horizon, but the beautiful pastel colors it leaves behind catch my eye. It looks as if someone has spilled paint across the sky.

  I jerk awake at the sound of a howl. For a split second, my heart rate picks up in fear—the coyote is coming for me. I take a deep breath and glance along the dark tree line of my backyard. Pull yourself together, Ashlee.

  It’s well past sundown—I’d say closer to midnight—and that howl was so sad and lonely.

  I narrow my eyes on a dark moving shadow. Suddenly, a set of glowing gold eyes emerge from the gardens and approach me. Oh god, it’s come to finish me off.

  I tense and hold still, hoping it won’t see me. It stops at the bottom of the porch steps and stares up at me. Not a coyote—a wolf? Its coat is thicker, shaggier, and it’s a different color.

  What am I? An animal magnet?

  “Shoo,” I whisper, not daring to move in case it attacks. It tilts its head to the side and lies down, resting its massive head on its paws, still watching me. I gulp, slowly curling in on myself. I’ll wait it out if I have to.

  After only a few minutes, it huffs, gets up, and wanders back into the dense night. I sigh in relief and quickly dash back inside before it changes its mind and comes back.

  Chapter Two

  Brooke is already waiting for me when I get to Anatomy. She winks at me as I enter, conspiratorially looking over her shoulder at Jayden, standing a few feet away. I shake my head and laugh at her.

  Jayden sits down behind us just before Mr. Zane arrives. I smile politely as I pull my notebook from my bag and turn back to my conversation about bone marrow density with Brooke.

  “So, Jayden,” Brooke starts, interrupting my enlightening description of marrow. I frown at her. “You wouldn’t know anyone here yet—if you like, Ash and I could show you around this weekend.” Okay, I’m not even mad. I twist to face him and raise an eyebrow, waiting for his answer.

  He glances down at his book in a shy gesture, but his expression stays impassive. “No, thank you.”

  I frown. Before I can answer, Brooke leans closer. “Fine, suit yourself.” Jayden nods, looking back down at his notebook. I tilt my head at Brooke, confused. She just shakes her head and sits back in her seat.

  “Miss Reynolds! Are you paying attention?” Mr. Zane startles me. It was kind of obvious I wasn’t listening, so I don’t know why he’s even bothered to ask. His face slowly descends the red color scale at my silence.

  “Sorry, sir.” I keep my voice low so as not to anger him further. I have no idea what his problem is with me.

  “Would you be so kind as to enlighten the class on what we were just discussing?”

  “Oh, umm…” What the hell are we learning about?

  “I thought not!” he shouts and then launches into another lecture about my failing grades and unlikelihood of getting into medical school and becoming a surgeon. What frustrates me the most is that his class is the only one I’m failing.

  ***

  I pull out my phone and call Dylan—my friend from high school—hoping he’ll answer. Staying home alone is creepy, and I don’t really feel in the mood for leftovers. Thankfully, he answers and agrees to pick me up and come with me to grab a bite to eat.

  We pull up at a small diner on the edge of the city, and I unbuckle my seat belt, ready to jump out.

  Dylan turns to me as we walk across the parking lot. “Are you okay after the other day? How are your stitches?” Dammit, Sammy. She must have told him what happened in the forest.

  Ignoring his question, I frown into the dark beside the car. “Is that Jayden?”

  “Who?” Dylan calls out after me as I jog back to the small ring of trees lining the parking lot. Jayden is leaning up against a tree, his knees pulled to his chest. I frown as I approach him, confused. He looks sick. His expression is full of pain, and his hands are clutched to either side of his head.

  “Jayden?”

  His head snaps up, and he looks at me, surprised. “Ashlee?”

  “Are you okay?” I kneel down near him.

  “What are you doing here?” He looks confused.

  “What do you mean? We’re in a parking lot. There are heaps of people here.” He looks past me as if suddenly realizing where he is.

  Okay, now I’m a little concerned.

  “I need to go,” he snaps, lifting himself off the ground.

  I grab his arm as he walks past. “What’s wrong? Do you need help?”

  “Please, just go away,” he pleads, his dark eyes full of fear. He yanks his arm from my grasp and walks away down the street. Should I go after him? What if he’s seriously hurt or ill? He needs a hospital.

  Dylan stops beside me and shoves his hands in his pockets. “What was that?”

  “No idea.” I watch the dark where Jayden vanished for a moment longer before turning back to the light of the fast food restaurant. “Let’s just get some food and go.”

  Jayden doesn’t turn up for classes the rest of the week.

  ***

  I feel like I do the same boring stuff every weekend. I have nowhere to go. Everyone is moving on with their lives, and I’m just sitting here, still the same person I was when I graduated high school. I wander out into the backyard with a book and lie down under one of the larger trees at the edge of the gardens.

  The sun slowly begins to set as I read. I roll over onto my stomach, adjusting my book, and freeze. A tingling sensation runs up my spine. I feel as though I’m being watched.

  A dark shape emerges from the undergrowth. I freeze as a huge cat walks over to me and lies in the grass near me. Seriously? More animals? It looks like a cougar. Should I run? Before I get the chance to move, it starts purring. Well, as close to purring as a big cat can get—more like a huff really. I shake my head at the overgrown kitty. It rolls over in the grass, rubbing its back. I keep very still and pretend to read. Hopefully it will just go away.

  Over the top of the book, I see it move closer, crawling along the grass on its belly toward me. My breathing picks up along with my heartbeat—I’m going to have a panic attack.

  A dry nose nudges my arm. I clamp my mouth shut so I don’t scream and frighten it into attacking me. I slowly lift my gaze and meet its gold eyes. Gold eyes again? It cocks its head to the side and then turns and runs off, back into the garden.

  If this continues, I’m going to need some serious psychological help.

  “Honey?” Mom’s voice scares me. I jump up from the grass and hold the book up, ready to fling it at her. “Whoa.” She smiles, holding up her hands in surrender.

  I let out the breath I was holding and drop my arms. “Mom, you startled me.” I pack up my blanket and walk toward her. “What are you doing here?”

  She waits for me to catch up and then follows me inside. “I just came to see if you wanted to come out to dinner with me before I leave.”

  ***

  I’ve been staring at my cell phone for almost fifteen minutes, bored out of my mind. Living alone is definitely not fun. Sighing, I throw my phone on the nightstand and walk over to my laptop. Surely someone is online? It’s only like five in the afternoon.

  As soon as I sign into my account, Brooke’s profile picture bounces along the screen with a message.

  Hey! I was just about to call you. Kelly is heading out of town tonight, so I was wondering if you wanted to have a girls’ night in.

  Oh my god. Yes. A million times yes. I quickly type out a reply and then dash downstairs to get some snacks out.

  Brooke arrives ten minutes later
with an armload of ice cream and a bottle of soda. “I’m so ready for this. I even brought Nicholas Sparks’ newest movie!” She waves a DVD in front of my face and then heads for the kitchen to dish out the ice cream. I follow her in and help scoop it into bowls.

  “So how’s living alone?” Brooke asks with an arched eyebrow.

  “Urgh! It’s horrible…I think I should start advertising for a roommate because the loneliness is ridiculous.”

  “Well, you know I’d help you out if I didn’t already have a lease.”

  “I know,” I answer softly.

  We settle into the couch and start the movie.

  I don’t know what it is about Nicholas Sparks—he has an uncanny ability to make you feel things so deeply that you nearly can’t handle the emotion overload.

  I’m crying by the credits. Brooke wipes at her eyes beside me.

  “So, that was horrifically beautiful.”

  “I know,” I sigh. “If only love like that were real.”

  “Maybe it is…”

  “Not in this town or even this country.”

  We settle back in, gossiping and snuggling cushions until late into the night. Brooke leaves with a wave, and I’m alone again. The quiet presses in on me. I run up the stairs and close myself into my room—safe. It takes me nearly all night to finally fall asleep, and when I do, it’s restless and full of nightmares.

  The sun rises, and I rise with it. I need to get out of this house. Snatching my laptop bag off my desk, I head to the only place I really want to be right now.

  The coffee shop on the edge of Main Street is practically empty when I enter with my laptop. I glance around at the vacant tables, my gaze landing on a dark-haired guy sitting by himself in the back. Smiling to myself, I head over and stop beside him. He keeps his eyes on the book in front of him, pretending not to notice as I stand there waiting for his attention.

  “Hi,” I say so quietly I almost sound shy, which is definitely not like me. I clear my throat and continue, stronger this time. “Do you mind if I sit?”

  Jayden looks up, and the bottom drops out of my stomach. His gorgeous dark eyes watch me, contemplating. Finally, he says, “I guess so,” and goes back to reading his book.

  I nod once to myself and take a seat across from him. I pull out my laptop and open up my essay for Econ.

  I catch myself more than once lifting my gaze over the lid of my laptop to stare at Jayden. I swear I’ve been staring at the same essay page for the last twenty minutes at least. My attempts to concentrate are totally not working. Jayden shifts in his chair, suddenly placing his book untidily on the table.

  “Ashlee?” he whispers, leaning across the small space towards me. I slowly lift my gaze to look at him. Can’t he see I’m trying to fail at Econ? “I’m sorry.” He holds my gaze as he apologises—like a true gentleman.

  Don’t get me wrong—the apology is nice and all, but…I’m a little lost. “Sorry for what exactly?”

  “The other night, in the parking lot of the—”

  “Stop,” I hold up a hand, interrupting him. I remember the night perfectly. “It’s fine. I understand. It’s none of my business.” I glance back down at my very uninteresting essay page and immediately berate myself for my harsh tone.

  I peek up at him. A look of hurt flashes across his face and he nods. “You wouldn’t understand if I told you.” I barely hear him whisper the words.

  I lift an eyebrow. “Drugs?”

  “What?” He looks surprised. “No.”

  “Then what?” I’m confused and a little worried. Is he in trouble with the law? Should I distance myself from this table?

  He looks over at me slowly, hesitating, as if he wants to tell me something. “I can’t.” I shake my head and frown at him. He sighs and lowers his head to the table, closing his eyes. He looks as if he’s shaking.

  I reach out and lay a hand on his arm. “Are you okay? Are you sick? Do you want me to take you to the hospital?”

  “No.” His voice is quiet. I quickly look around the coffee shop before turning back to him. He tilts his head up to look at me, his eyes flashing. I gasp and snatch my hand back. That was not right.

  He puts his head back on the table, hiding his face. “Jayden?” I pause and take a shallow breath. “What is wrong with…?” I can’t even finish the sentence. I don’t know what I just saw, but I’m beginning to feel afraid. “What’s going on?”

  “I need to go,” he whispers, his voice muffled by his arms.

  I nod even though he’s not looking. “Okay. Are you sure I can’t take you somewhere? The hospital, maybe?” Or a psych ward?

  He lifts his head again, his eyes normal. “I’m fine.” He’s still shaking. I nod slowly and get up to help him out of the booth.

  As soon as he’s gone, I sit slowly and stare blankly at my laptop screen.

  Well, it’s going to be impossible for me to concentrate on my Econ essay now.

  Chapter Three

  Sammy helps me pin my hair up with about a million bobby pins, which are going to be a pain to take out later tonight, but my reflection in the mirror is worth it. I run my hands down the lace at the front of my silver blouse. It’s absolutely gorgeous.

  Sammy and I smile at each other then head downstairs to meet Kai and Dylan in the entry.

  We park a few blocks away from the club and walk until we reach the back of a long line.

  “I’ve been itching to check this place out since it opened,” Dylan pipes up excitedly beside me. The new club is called The Effect, and it only opened a week ago. “Do you think I should give the band’s card to the bartender?”

  “Of course,” Sammy answers. “These people haven’t lived until they’ve heard you sing!”

  Finally, the doorman waves us in. I pause just inside and glance around the club in amazement. The roof looks absolutely beautiful—neons and paint and a screen playing music videos…on the roof. I’m honestly lost for words. The wait outside was definitely worth it.

  Sammy taps me on the shoulder. I smile at her as she hands me a Coke. “Have you seen the roof?” I shout close to her ear. She nods and tilts her head back to gaze up at the screen.

  “Kai and I are going to dance!” she leans close and shouts over the music. I nod with a small smile and back up until I’m against the edge of the room.

  People dance and shout and laugh all around me. I spy Dylan through the crowd, handing his card over the bar. The bartender looks happy—maybe he’s heard of Dylan’s talent. I sip my Coke and gaze back out at the room.

  This used to be my scene. I used to love coming to clubs just to lose myself in the music. Right now, though—I just can’t seem to get into it. My chest feels heavy and tight. The weight of the world is pulling me down, and every breath I take feels as if I’m going to drown.

  Something is missing from my life. I can feel it.

  I watch Kai dip a giggling Sammy. They look so happy. And the way he looks at her…

  I want that.

  I want someone to look at me that way. I want someone to hold me close at night. I want someone to be there for me when the weight of the world gets too much and I can’t take it anymore.

  I want real love…

  Just as I swing around to make a break for the toilets, someone steps out beside me, and I run into them, spilling my drink down the front of their shirt. I gasp and then quickly set my glass down on the nearest table to grab a handful of napkins. “Oh god, I’m so sorry.” I start dabbing at the ruined shirt.

  “It’s fine. Just leave it,” the owner of the shirt says, his voice unemotional and cold.

  Okay, I know I spilled my drink on him, but I don’t appreciate his snappy tone. “I said I was sorry.”

  “I know,” he sighs. “I’m sorry.”

  I stop dabbing and look up, pulling back my clenched fistful of napkins in surprise. “Oh, Jayden?” He nods, his expression impassive. “I didn’t realize it was you.”

  “I can see that.” He glances
behind me to Kai and Sammy. He knows who I was watching, and the way he looks at me makes me feel as if he knows my depressing thoughts as well. I can already feel the warm blush spread across my face.

  I look at Jayden—actually look at him this time. His dark eyes glitter in the neon lighting, and he’s wearing dark jeans and a grey shirt that pulls tight over his chest and arms. The only thing marring the perfection is the huge wet Coke stain.

  “Finished?” He smirks as he leans up against the wall beside me.

  Oh gods, real smooth, Ash—of course he saw you checking him out. Could you be any more obvious?

  I shake my head and look down at his ruined shirt. “Umm, well, that’s embarrassing.” I can’t believe I just did that. Face palm.

  The last time we spoke flashes in my memory. I’m still not entirely sure I know what that was at the coffee shop. Should I make a break for it? Will he come after me?

  A thought suddenly strikes me—I’m afraid of him. Completely and utterly afraid.

  “So who did you come with?”

  I point out into the dancing couples. “My friends.”

  Jayden’s gaze levels with mine, and he holds out his hand. “Would you like to dance?”

  Oh god, how am I supposed to respond to that? Aren’t I supposed to be afraid?

  I glance at Sammy and Kai then nod. “Yes.” Even if you are a crazy serial killer. At least I won’t be alone when I die.

  I place my hand in his. It’s so soft and warm. He leads me out onto the dance floor and pulls me close. My eyes widen in surprise, and I wrap my arms around his neck. “I don’t think this is a slow song?”

  The music finishes, and a new song starts. I stare at Jayden curiously as the people around us transform into slowly swaying couples. He leans his head down beside my ear. I can feel his breath brush across my neck. A shiver runs down my spine. I hesitantly move closer and lay my forehead on his shoulder. He smells like forest pines and clean spring water—it’s surprisingly appealing.