Harlequin KISS August 2014 Bundle

by Amy Andrews, Aimee Carson, Avril Tremayne

‘I blew it. Because every day the walls closed in a little more. I threw myself into work—anything to avoid returning to a place that had become like a prison. Eventually I couldn’t take it any more. So in true Masterson style I upped and left. I vowed to give Charlotte the rest of my life and I managed less than eight hundred days before I cracked and walked out of the door. Just like Zeb walked out of Saru’s.’

  His voice was so full of self-derision, so sure of his own guilt, it turned her thoughts topsy-turvy.

  ‘So that’s why we cannot take this any further. I hurt one woman in the pursuit of an impossible dream. I won’t hurt another. You deserve better. A man who wants a home and a family. A man you can trust.’

  His last five words stopped her in her tracks. Adam was right. If they took things further they would spend the whole time waiting for the sword to fall. Damocles would have nothing on them. Olivia loved her home; the thought of sitting in it, waiting and watching to see the walls close in on Adam, made her body shiver in revolt. All they could have was an interval until Adam left.

  She had just witnessed what an utter coward Zeb was, and it was Zeb who had brought Adam up—Zeb whose genes he carried. Which explained why Adam still moved from place to place, had his moving line of beautiful women. What an idiot she was; she’d let mind-blowing sex blind her to all common sense. Looked through the filter of an amazing orgasm or three and made herself believe that Adam Masterson was something he wasn’t.

  Been willing to take a risk and trust him, let him in to her carefully constructed life. She couldn’t even blame him—after all, Adam had never lied to her; he knew the kind of man he was and acknowledged it freely. He was a man who walked away. Like his father. Like her own father.

  Idiot didn’t begin to cover it. Because she’d broken all her own rules and now her poor exposed heart was shattering.

  But, damn it, she’d chosen to jump on the conveyor belt and now she would climb off with her dignity and her self-respect intact. Hell, she’d even take him up on the private jet offer.

  She gulped in the salty air before rising to her feet. ‘You’re right. I do deserve all of that. So if you wouldn’t mind sorting out the jet I’ll go back and pack. I can get a boat to the mainland, then a taxi to the airport—or I’m sure Gan or Saru would drive me. Good luck, Adam. And thanks for last night—it was fun. But you’re right. Better to quit whilst we’re ahead of the game.’

  Turning, she walked away across the sand and didn’t look back.

  Didn’t see Adam scramble to his feet and stretch out a hand.

  Didn’t hear his whispered, ‘Liv...’ before he slammed his hands into his pockets and stared out to sea.

  FOURTEEN

  Olivia duct-taped the cardboard box securely and hoisted herself up from her hunched crouch. Pressing one hand to the small of her back, she stretched and glanced around the packing-case-strewn floor of her mum’s apartment.

  ‘We’re getting there,’ she said, watching as Jodie carefully wrapped a delicate glass figurine in tissue paper.

  Jodie smiled at her. ‘And we’d get there a lot quicker if you stopped clucking over me and let me do more.’

  ‘You’ve done loads. And you’re six months pregnant, remember?’

  ‘Well, second trimester or not, I can make my lovely daughter a cup of tea.’

  ‘Thank you, Mum.’

  Jodie glided across the thick-pile cream carpet, one hand circling her swollen belly with a reverent touch that filled Olivia with a strange yearning. Admiration and love mingled in her chest. Her mother had been completely unfazed by Zeb’s attitude—had accepted his decision with a serene dignity. She hadn’t let it affect her enjoyment in her pregnancy. Diet, yoga—anything Jodie could do to ensure the health of the baby she was doing. In spades.

  ‘This way the baby will be healthy and so will I,’ she’d explained. ‘So I can look after her properly.’ Reaching out, she’d laid a hand on Olivia’s forearm. ‘I know I made mistakes with you, Livvy. I want to make sure this time I get it right.’

  ‘Oh, Mum. You did great with me. I couldn’t have wished for a better mum.’

  ‘That’s sweet of you, darling, even if it’s the most enormous fib. I do know that I love you more than anything else in my life. But it’s time I stopped relying on you. This baby is a second chance for me. I have to learn to stand on my own two feet.’ Jodie lifted an elegant hand to forestall Olivia’s protest. ‘It’s true. I’m forty-two years old and I have spent my whole life depending on other people. I owe you an apology.’

  ‘No. You don’t.’

  ‘Yes, I do. I am determined things are going to change. I’ve even got myself a job in the mother and baby store in town, and I love it.’

  And over the two months since Olivia’s return from the disastrous Masterson Mission she had come to see that Jodie meant every word.

  Memories threatened. Adam’s sinful smile—the real one that she had believed was for her and her alone. His eyes—shades of brown, glinting with mischief or dark with desire. His touch. When would her body stop craving it?

  ‘Livvy? Tea’s up.’

  Olivia blinked the thoughts away and focused on the present, accepted the steaming mug with an attempt at a smile. She needed to banish Adam from her brain or at least wean herself off the man. Allow herself a hundred memories today and ninety-nine tomorrow.

  Her mum’s blue eyes studied her way too thoughtfully.

  ‘How did last night go?’ Olivia blurted. ‘At antenatal class? I’m so sorry I couldn’t make it, but—’

  ‘Sweetheart, I told you—it’s fine. I get that you needed to see a client. It’s no biggie. The class went well. Really well, in fact.’

  Jodie opened her mouth and then closed it again, turned away so that her highlighted bob swung forward to hide her expression.

  ‘Mum, are you sure everything is OK? You do know you don’t have to move out of here?’

  Jodie swung back round. ‘Olivia Louisa Evans. We are not having this conversation again. I am appalled with myself for not realising long ago how wrong it was that you have been paying the extortionate rent on this place.’ Her lips curved into a loving smile. ‘Plus, I adore my new place. It’s way more suitable for Bubs and me. There’s a park. Local shops. It’s a real community. Anyway, you’re still contributing to the rent.’

  ‘Mum. I’ve explained. I’m not contributing. You’re earning the money. Consulting at Working Wardrobes counts as a job.’

  It had turned out that whilst Olivia had been away her stand-in had gone AWOL. It had been Jodie who had stepped into the breach; Suzi, love her, had the clothes sense of a horse.

  Her mother had done an amazing job.

  There came a lash of guilt. If Jodie had been wrong to accept Olivia’s help, Olivia had been wrong not to be honest with her mother. Had been wrong in so many of the assumptions she had made about Jodie. Turned out some people did change.

  ‘Where are you going?’ she asked as Jodie shrugged herself into her chic lime-green raincoat.

  ‘Milk,’ Jodie said. ‘I’ve run out of milk. I’ll just pop out.’

  ‘I can go.’

  ‘No. It’s good exercise for me.’ Jodie tied the belt loosely around her waist. ‘See you later, Livvy.’

  Five minutes after the door had clicked shut behind her mum the doorbell chimed. Sighing, Olivia switched the Hoover off. Many things had changed about Jodie, but housework still wasn’t her forte. There was enough dust gathered behind the sofa to fill a skip. Olivia swiped a hand across her brow and grimaced as she glanced in the mirror. The postman was in for a bit of a shock.

  She pulled the door open and shock impacted her, dropped her chin kneewards. ‘What are you—?’

  And why now? If ever she had been stupid enough to hallucinate Adam turning up unannounced, the visio
n had not included Olivia dressed in an old apron, with a scarf over her head, looking like a demented version of a fifties housewife.

  Deep breath.

  ‘Adam. What are you doing here?’ She half closed the door and stepped forward, holding the handle behind her back.

  ‘I’m here to see you. Didn’t Jodie mention it?’

  Just great. Maybe her mum was retaliating against Olivia’s foolhardy jaunt across the world to find a man her mother had already identified as a waste of space.

  ‘No. She didn’t mention it.’

  ‘Ah. Well, she knows I’m here. So can I come in?’

  ‘No.’ Just this glimpse of him was half killing her; no way was she letting him inside.

  Dark blue jeans moulded to muscular thighs, and his reggae T-shirt stretched across the expanse of his chest and brought back a flood of memories she’d kept at bay for weeks. His dark hair was longer than she remembered, and it glinted with raindrops from the intermittent spring showers that were plaguing Bath.

  Adam sighed. ‘I’m not going anywhere, Olivia. So you have two choices. You can let me in. Or I can pick you up, sling you over my shoulder and carry you inside. Your choice. Three seconds.’

  For an insane heartbeat Olivia was tempted to hold her ground; a tremor weakened her legs at the thought of being thrown over Adam’s shoulder.

  As if reading her mind, he raised an eyebrow and stepped forward.

  She had to get a grip; if she let Adam touch her she would be lost. Stepping backwards, she sucked in a breath to avoid any such possibility. The downside of that strategy being that she got a lungful of his woodsy scent. Her head whirled as desire jolted through her.

  ‘Let’s make this quick. I don’t care if Mum knows you’re here. I want you gone before she gets back.’

  ‘That’s no problem. Jodie won’t be back for a while.’

  ‘Huh? What have you done? Where is she?’

  ‘Liv, I’m not the mafia, and this isn’t a mob movie. Jodie said she’d spend the day with her friend Juliette and go to the cinema.’

  He’d called her Liv, and the fact spread warmth over her chest. A heat she had to fight.

  ‘Hang on a minute.’ Olivia slammed her hands onto her hips, tried to ignore the sudden predatory glint in his eyes as they rested on her body. ‘Exactly when did Mum tell you all of this?’

  ‘Yesterday. I called her and we met for a coffee. Or a herbal tea, in your mum’s case.’

  ‘You came to sort out the money?’ Why else would he have turned up?

  ‘Amongst other things,’ he agreed calmly. ‘Your mother strikes a hard bargain.’

  ‘She took the money?’ Confusion mixed with an obscure sense of disappointment.

  ‘Why shouldn’t she? The baby is my sister just as much as yours. I don’t see why she shouldn’t benefit. Jodie suggested I set up a trust fund for the baby, which is exactly what I’ve done. The money will be hers when she reaches the age of twenty-one—or before, if Jodie, you and I all agree. So if she wants to go to university, or go travelling, or set up a business, or buy a home she’ll be able to.’

  Adam smiled. Her smile—the one that warmed his eyes and curled her toes in the grubby trainers that currently adorned her feet.

  ‘You and your mum are very alike. It took me a while to persuade her to accept anything from me.’

  Olivia flexed her feet and attempted to pull her brain into gear. ‘This is all very generous of you, Adam, but it’s between you and Mum. Nothing to do with me. It doesn’t explain why you’re here. Unless you want my gratitude? If so, thanks very much, and the door is that way.’

  Ungracious, she knew. But Adam must know that she couldn’t be bought—though what he was trying to buy was anyone’s guess. Another night? Heaven help her, her body melted at the thought. So the sooner he left, the better.

  He stepped forwards, closing the space between them, and she moved backwards, manoeuvred herself behind the sofa.

  ‘I’m not after your gratitude, Liv. I came here because I wanted to see you. I needed to see you.’

  Her tummy fluttered with an anticipatory fizz that common sense instantly doused. There were loads of reasons for Adam to need to see her. She tucked a stray tendril of hair behind her ear, her fingers skimming the synthetic material of the utterly horrendous scarf. Her fingers itched with the feminine need to tug the damn thing off and she dropped her hands to grip the back of the sofa. She didn’t care how she looked.

  ‘If you need me to sign something to do with the trust fund leave the papers here. I’ll get them back to you once I’ve read them.’

  ‘That’s not what I need.’ Brown eyes looked at her with a hunger he made no effort to hide. ‘Why didn’t you tell your mum about us?’

  Olivia narrowed her eyes. ‘How do you know I didn’t?’

  ‘Because after I took her to her antenatal class last night we went for a drink, and until I explained the situation she seemed to think that I was just someone who’d helped you find Zeb.’

  Olivia wasn’t sure which bit of the sentence to tackle first. ‘You went to her antenatal class?’

  ‘Yes.’

  Adam took another step closer to the sofa so that he stood at the corner, and her heart started flipping like a blueberry pancake in her chest.

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Because I want to be part of my sister’s life.’

  ‘You do?’

  ‘Yes,’ he said simply. ‘Just because Zeb isn’t choosing to feature it doesn’t mean I can’t. That’s why I went to Jodie first, before coming to find you. I want you both to know that regardless of what happens between you and me I will always be involved. Not out of duty but out of love.’

  His words swam around her mind, her brain circling and trying to come to terms with them. It focused finally on ‘regardless of what happens between you and me’.

  ‘You and me?’ Clenching her nails into the palms of her hand, she straightened her shoulders. ‘I don’t understand. There is no you and me. And, whatever happened between us in the past, I’d never stand in the way of you being in the baby’s life.’

  ‘I want there to be a you and me.’

  His words resurrected that tendril of hope—the very one she thought she’d uprooted and composted. Careful, Olivia. He’d cracked her barriers and her heart on a Thai beach two months ago. Don’t let him hurt you more.

  ‘You were pretty damn clear two months ago that that wasn’t a possibility. Sure enough that you convinced me.’

  He rubbed a hand over his face and back up and through his hair—such a familiar gesture that her heart ached.

  ‘Two months ago I was an idiot.’

  ‘And now?’

  ‘Now I know that whilst I may still be an idiot I’m not my father. I don’t want to walk away from the baby. And I don’t want to walk away from you.’

  Another step and he was behind the sofa with her. Her only method of escape was to scramble over the back. The problem was flight was the very last thing on her mind.

  Wait, Olivia. Don’t just fall into his arms.

  Adhering her feet to the floor, she turned to face him. ‘But you will. You walked away from Charlotte.’

  ‘Yes, I did. But I’ve done a lot of thinking these past weeks.’ He rubbed the back of his neck. ‘After Zeb and I parted ways years ago I was adrift.’

  Against her will she felt her heart smite her as she imagined the incredible hurt of that rejection. So much worse than being rejected as an unknown baby.

  ‘I thought a home would ground me,’ he continued. ‘Then I met Charlotte. She was an army child; she’d never had real roots. She was desperate for a home, as well. We were so caught up in the idea of having a home we thought that was what marriage was all about. We were in love with an idea, not each
other.’ His forehead creased into a frown of confusion. ‘Does that make sense? Because it makes perfect sense to me now that I’ve met you and I’ve understood what love really is.’

  ‘What is love?’

  ‘It’s wanting be with the person you love all the time. It’s feeling able to share anything and not be judged. It’s loving the sound of their voice and the smell of their hair.’ His huge body was rigid with tension as he closed the gap further. ‘I love you, Olivia. I know I messed up, but please believe this: I love you. And I will spend the rest of my life proving it to you and winning your love.’

  Joy exploded in a firework of happiness, sending her giddy as she took the final steps so that she was standing close enough to touch him.

  ‘You don’t have to win my love, Adam.’ She placed her hand on his heart. ‘You already have it.’

  ‘I do?’ His smile was blinding in its radiance as he spanned her waist and tugged her closer.

  ‘You do. I love you, Adam. I love how you make me feel beautiful and how you make me want to feel beautiful. For you. I love how I trust you to protect me and care for me. I love how you make me smoothies. I love the way you give and I love the way you take. I just love you. With all my heart. And all my other vital organs, too.’

  She grinned at him.

  ‘And I mean all! Turns out love isn’t an illusion after all. It’s wanting to be with someone and not caring where you are. If you don’t want to live in a house then we’ll live in a hotel suite. We can live in a tent, if you like.’

  Adam shook his head. ‘Liv, that week in Ko Lanta with you in that house was magical. I get that it was only a week, but not once did the walls so much as move. I want more of that. I want to go shopping and fill a house with clutter, with souvenirs of our life together. Which reminds me...’ He dug into his jeans pocket and handed over a small tissue-wrapped packet before looping his arms back round her.

  Olivia opened it up and gave a small gasp. Nestled in the folds were three silver charms.

  Pushing her sleeve up, she unclasped the bracelet he’d given her. ‘I’ll put them on now.’