by Joy Argento
Ali helped her to the couch. “I think I should stay here tonight. Or at least until Jenny can come.”
Madison was in no condition to argue. “How about we give those pills a little more time to work and then you can decide if you want me to help you upstairs or if you want to sleep on the couch. I can help you get your pajamas on then.”
“Okay.” What else could she say? Maybe if the pills kicked in enough, she could get ready for bed herself. She doubted it.
“Want the TV on or anything? Or maybe I could sing to you,” Ali said.
She smiled. Another memory filtered in. Ali would sing to her whenever she was down. The thing was, Ali couldn’t sing to save her life. She often sang even worse on purpose to make Madison laugh. It never failed. “Yeah, no thanks. I don’t think my eardrums can take it.”
“Oh, come on. I never sang that bad. You used to love it.” Ali smiled.
“I did,” Madison admitted. “But I was young and foolish then. Now I’m all grown up and sophisticated.”
“Well, excuse me, Your Highness. I didn’t realize you had risen so high in the world.”
Madison was glad they were keeping it light. She didn’t think she could stand the thought of one more heartfelt apology. Of course, at some point she should probably tell Ali she forgave her. But tonight was not the time for that.
“I have. TV would be fine. That won’t hurt my back.”
“Oh, and me singing will?” Ali picked up the TV remote from the coffee table.
“Probably not, but why take the chance?”
“I can’t sing, don’t ask me,” Ali sang, letting her voice purposely crack.
Madison giggled. She wasn’t sure if it was because Ali was being silly or because she was feeling loopy because of the pills. “Ow. Don’t make me laugh. It hurts.”
“Sorry.”
That word again. Enough. “No more apologies tonight.”
“If I understand this, there will be no more singing, no more apologies, and no more making you laugh. Anything else?”
“No. I think that’s it for now. Wait, one more. If you do need to help me get ready for bed, no peeking.” Oh yeah, the drugs were affecting more than her pain level.
“I wouldn’t dream of it. Well, I have actually dreamt of it, but I will do my best to grant your wish.”
“You haven’t changed much.” Madison surprised herself with that statement.
“That’s where you’re wrong. I’ve changed a great deal.” Ali sat down, remote in hand.
“You still have that silly sense of humor. How have you changed?” Ali seemed to turn serious. “I’ve grown up in a lot of ways. But, interestingly enough, I have realized in the last few weeks that I have been so immature in other ways.”
“Immature how?”
“In relationships. None of them after you worked. But I stayed in them until the other person kicked me out of them. I was like a child hoping to be loved, never realizing that I didn’t really want any of these women to love me.” She shook her head. “I’m probably not making much sense.”
“I wasn’t sure if it was you or the pills. They seem to be talking to me too.” Madison giggled. “Sorry.”
“You get to say sorry, but I don’t?”
“Sorry for saying sorry. Oh yeah. I guess I do get to say it.”
“Maybe we should get you to bed.”
“I had a comeback line for that, but it went out of my head.”
“You should say something like, yes, take me to bed.”
“Nice try, but I’m thinking no. At least saying it like that. My head is starting to swim, but the good news is the pills took the edge off my pain. At least while I’m sitting. No guarantees to what will happen when I stand up and try to walk.”
Ali got up. “Should I get your stuff, and we can get you ready down here, or should we try for the stairs and get you up to your bedroom?”
“Help me stand up and let’s see how I do with that first.” She put her hand out to Ali. “Please.”
Ali took her hand and wrapped an arm around her. She eased her up to a standing position. “How was that?”
“Manageable. Let’s try the stairs.” They took several tentative steps.
“Doing okay?”
“Yep. Just so you know I’ll probably start swearing like a sailor if I’m not.”
“Oh, man. Not a sailor.” They took a few more steps in slow motion.
“Yep. A sailor.”
It took a few minutes to get up the stairs, but they did it. There was pain with every step, but it wasn’t bad enough to make Madison swear. Ali helped lower her to a sitting position on the bed, and Madison told her where her nightclothes were.
Good thing I’m on drugs, Madison thought, or I would be freaking out at the thought of Ali undressing me.
Ali made quick work of gathering what they needed and was mercifully careful and respectful getting Madison changed.
“The guest room is down the hall and there are extra blankets in the hall closet,” Madison said once she was on her feet again and Ali was pulling down the covers for her. Ali helped her into bed and pulled up the blankets.
“Got it.” Ali ran downstairs and grabbed the bottle of pills, a glass of water, and Madison’s phone. She set the water and pills on the nightstand and fiddled with something on Madison’s phone. “I set your alarm for your next dose of meds. It’s important to take it on time. It’s not good to be chasing the pain.”
Madison couldn’t have asked for better help. Ali seemed to think of everything, which was good because Madison was having trouble thinking at all. Sleep was overtaking her fast.
“Anything else you need?” Ali asked.
“Mmm…ffe…nnaw.”
“I’ll take that as a no.” Ali brushed the hair away from Madison’s face. She resisted the urge to kiss her on the forehead. Oh, who was she kidding? Her attention went to Madison’s lips as she drifted off to sleep. It took willpower to not do something stupid. She left the room and turned off the light but left the door open.
Once in the spare bedroom she realized she didn’t have anything to sleep in. All her stuff was still at the hotel. She didn’t dare leave in case Madison needed something while she was gone. She slipped off her shoes, pants, and socks and shimmied out of her bra without removing her T-shirt.
She doubled up the pillows on the bed and jumped in. She was halfway through a Netflix movie on her phone when she heard Madison’s phone ring. She stopped the movie and listened. When it didn’t appear that Madison was going to answer it, Ali went into her room and pressed the answer button. It was Jenny. Ali explained what was going on.
“I’m glad she’s not alone. I can come over if you want to go.”
“I’ve got this. We can see how she is in the morning. I’m sure she’ll give you a call.”
“Stay close. That medicine knocks her out. Just make sure you can hear her if she calls. She tends to not be very loud when she is groggy.”
“Okay. Anything else I should know?”
“Not really. Sounds like you have things handled. Please make sure one of you keeps me updated.”
“Will do.” Ali went back to the guest room after she hung up Madison’s phone. She grabbed the pillows off the bed and two blankets from the hall closet. She made herself a makeshift bed on the floor. She wanted to make sure she could hear Madison if she needed her. She sent a quick text to Charley, letting him know what was going on and that she would probably be in Maryland a few days longer. She adjusted her pillows, did her best to get into a comfortable position, and lay awake for a long time just listening to Madison breathe. Thoughts of a younger Madison, a Madison who loved her, drifted in and out of her thoughts. She wanted that Madison back. She wanted this Madison now. She wondered if she would ever find another love like the one they’d had. One way or ano
ther, she was determined to find that again.
Chapter Ten
Madison woke to pain in her back and the sound of light snoring coming from the vicinity of her floor. It took her several seconds to realize that Ali was sleeping a few feet away. There was enough light from the moon seeping into the room that she could make out her outline and one naked leg sticking out from under the blanket. She still had nice legs for a thirty-eight-year-old. Leg, she jokingly corrected herself. Her other leg might be hideous. She giggled out loud.
“Huh? What?” Ali was awake and on her feet in an instant. “What do you need?”
Turned out that Ali’s left leg was just as nice as her right.
“I’ve got some pain going on here.”
“I don’t hear you swearing so it can’t be that bad.”
“I’ve got some fucking pain going on here. Is that better? Is it time for more medicine?”
Ali looked at Madison’s phone. “You’ve got fifteen minutes, but it’s probably okay to take it now.”
She helped Madison sit up, propping a pillow behind her. Oh yeah, that hurt. “Fuck.”
Madison took the pills and water Ali offered her and downed them. “How come you’re sleeping on the floor? There is a perfectly good bed in the other room.”
“I wanted to be close by in case you needed me.” That went straight to Madison’s heart. She didn’t know anyone else who would have done that for her. “That was very kind of you.”
“Jenny called by the way.”
“She did? I never even heard my phone.”
“You were pretty out of it. Those pills do you in, but the sleep is good for you.” Madison couldn’t believe she was thinking it, but she was glad Ali was there to help. It wouldn’t change anything, but it was nice having her around for a while.
* * *
The pain had let up a little by morning, but each movement still hurt. A lot. Ali helped her downstairs in her pajamas and settled her in on the couch. Ali ran out to get breakfast and her stuff from the motel, while Madison called Jenny.
“I couldn’t believe it when Ali answered the phone last night. I thought maybe the two of you were sleeping together,” Jenny said.
“Why would your brain even go there?”
“Maddy, I’ve seen how messed up you have been over her. You must still have feelings for her, even if you won’t admit it.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Madison adjusted her position on the couch, with sloth like speed, trying to get more comfortable.
“That’s what I’m talking about. You won’t admit it, even to yourself. If you were truly over her, then anything she did, including showing up in town, wouldn’t have bothered you.”
“Whatever.” Where was Ali with that food? Madison’s brain was starting to swirl again as the last dose of medicine was taking effect. She had never been one to like the feeling of getting high, even in high school when everyone else was smoking pot. She certainly wasn’t enjoying this feeling now.
“Anyway, Patty is taking the next three days off so she can stay with the baby. That way I can fill in for you at the donut shop. We can reevaluate after that and see if you need more time off. How does that sound?”
“Good. I really appreciate this.”
“No problem. Do you think Ali would be willing to stay with you to help?”
Damn. Madison hadn’t even thought about the fact that no one else would be available.
“I don’t know.” Could she possibly be able to stay by herself? She twisted her back slightly to test the pain level. Even with taking the meds she would have trouble managing by herself. Who else could she ask? She had a few friends. Of course the donut shop kept her so busy that she hadn’t kept up with them as much as she should have. Besides, most of them had kids to take care of. She was out of options. “I’ll ask her,” she said reluctantly. As if on cue, Ali came through the door trying to balance a tray with two cups of coffee, two big bags, and a smaller bag from Burger King. She nodded to Madison, set the tray on the coffee table, and disappeared into the kitchen.
“Ali just got back. I’ll ask her about staying to help.”
“Okay. Keep me updated on everything. I’ll let you go.”
They said their good-byes and Madison let her phone drop on the couch cushion next to her. She didn’t dare reach for one of the coffee cups on the table in front of her. She didn’t have to wait long for Ali to return.
“I picked up some groceries, so we don’t have to keep eating fast food. I hope you don’t mind.”
“That was very nice of you,” Madison said, and she meant it. Ali moved the coffee table closer to Madison.
“I’ll be right back,” Ali said and disappeared out the door only to return with a box. She set the box on the table and put one of the cups of coffee on it. “Cream and two sugars. I hope that’s still how you like it. I should have checked before I left.”
Madison was touched that Ali had remembered. She was shocked and a bit embarrassed when her eyes welled up with tears. She tried to nonchalantly dab at them with her sleeve.
“Are you in pain? What can I do?” Apparently, the move hadn’t escaped Ali’s notice.
“I’m okay. Yes. The coffee is perfect.”
Ali proceeded to set Madison’s breakfast on the box she had put the coffee on. “That should make it easier for you. Less reaching and twisting.”
This time the dam opened, and Madison started full-on crying. She was sure it was a combination of pain, medicine, and Ali’s unexpected thoughtfulness. Ali’s unexpected thoughtfulness also frustrated the hell out of her. She didn’t want to be grateful to her. Crap. “Oh, Madison, you’re crying.”
Madison swiped carefully at the tears on her cheeks. “Your powers of observation are impressive.” She immediately regretted her remark, meant to be funny but sounding more like sarcasm. “I’m sorry.”
Ali pulled several napkins from the Burger King bag and handed them to Madison. “You have nothing to be sorry for. You have every reason to cry. I just wish there was something more I could do.”
That only brought a fresh cascade of tears.
Ali had the urge to put her arms around Madison and pull her into a tight hug, but not only would that cause her more pain, it probably wouldn’t be welcomed. “Madison, what can I do?”
Madison wiped her eyes. “Nothing. I’m all right.”
“You don’t seem all right. Is it the pain?”
“The pain isn’t helping. But that’s not why I’m crying.”
Ali squatted down in front of Madison and looked up at her. “Then what’s wrong?”
“Damned if I know.” She laughed as if it was the funniest thing ever.
That only managed to confuse Ali more. At least laughing was better than crying.
Ali stood. “Get some food into you. Maybe that will help.”
Madison nodded.
“Don’t cry when I tell you this, but I got you a present.”
“You didn’t have to do that.”
“Don’t get too excited. I got you a raised toilet seat. You know, the kind with the handles that old people use. It’s in the car.”
“I’m too old to use the regular toilet,” Madison whined.
“Stop. You shouldn’t say you’re old. I prefer the word elderly.”
“Yeah. That is so much better. And if I’m elderly, you are too. You’re only a few months younger than me.”
“I accept that. The difference is I can use a regular toilet.”
“That is something to celebrate.” Madison held up her cup of coffee. “But seriously, I really do appreciate it. I’ll reimburse you for whatever you spent.”
“My treat.”
Madison laughed. “It’s the best gift I’ve ever gotten.”
“Wow. You don’t lead a very interes
ting life do you?”
“Apparently not, if a toilet seat can be so meaningful to me.”
“Okay, enough toilet talk. I need to get that out of my head so I can enjoy my breakfast.”
They ate in relative silence. Ali was in the kitchen cleaning up when she heard the front door open and a female voice ask Madison how she was doing. She didn’t know if she should just stay in the kitchen or go back to the living room. Curiosity won out. She recognized Jenny, Madison’s older sister, immediately. It had been a long time since she’d seen her last.
“Hi, Ali,” Jenny said. “I just stopped in to see how things are going. I’ve only got about a half hour, then I need to get back to the donut shop.”
“Hi. You haven’t changed at all.” The years looked like they had been kind to her. “I’ll leave you two to visit. Madison, do you need anything before I go?”
“You don’t have to leave,” Jenny said.
“It’s okay. I’ll be back in about twenty minutes if that’s okay. Madison?”
“No. I don’t need anything.”
“Back soon,” Ali said as she headed to the door. She started her car and drove down the street about three blocks. She pulled over and called Charley.
“How are you doing, baby doll?”
“Madison seems to be in a lot of pain, even with the medicine.”
“Understandable. Back pain is the worse. But I’m asking how you are doing.”
Ali had to think about it for a few moments. She had been so intent on taking care of Madison that she hadn’t checked in with herself. “I’m okay. It’s so nice and so weird to be around her again.”
“Weird how?”
“I never thought I would ever see her again, let alone be in this situation. It feels surreal at times.”
“Is that good or bad?”
“Neither. It just is.” Ali didn’t know how to explain it. Her feelings for Madison had been seeping back in. But Madison had made it perfectly clear that she didn’t feel the same. Ali had no choice but to accept that. When Madison felt better Ali would head back home and get on with her life. At least she would be doing it with a better understanding of herself, and her feelings.