James

by Chantal Fernando

  “Bullshit,” I scoff, calling her bluff. She pulls a document out of her handbag and hands it over to me. A licence certificate. It looks legitimate, but what do I know about forged documents?

  “What do you want?” I ask her warily.

  “I want my husband, of course,” she says.

  I practically growl and slam the door shut in her face. My phone rings again and I answer.

  “Sasha, I’m almost home. I can explain,” James says the second I answer. He sounds nervous. A bad feeling takes over.

  “Are you married to her? Yes or no,” I tell him.

  “It’s complicated-”

  “Yes or no, James!” I yell.

  “Yes, but-”

  I hang up.

  James Steele is married.

  The love of my life is married. Great, now I’m a fucking adulteress. How could he do this to me? To Jye? To us? I try my hardest to shut my mind off. I need the numbness right now. I call my mother and ask her if she can keep Jye for another night, she says it’s no problem at all. I’m grateful. I don’t want Jye to see me break. To see me weak. Because right now I’m barely holding it together.

  I walk outside the front door to find that bitch parked across the road in her rental car. She smiles when she sees me. She smiles. I generally don’t get into fights anymore. As a mother, I want to set an example for my kid. I want to lead by example. So, I tone down my crazy. Right this very second, though, all those thoughts are out the window.

  I walk right up to her car and take out the house key, dangling it in front of her. She warily puts her window down, and I put my hand in and offer her the key. She smirks and takes it. As soon as the key is in her hand, I grab the back of her head and hit it into the steering wheel. Once, twice. Thrice for good measure. Then I walk off, get into my car and drive off.

  ***

  James

  There's an unfamiliar car parked in my driveway, and Sasha’s car is gone. I seriously don’t like where this is going. I open the front door and head to my bedroom, when I hear the television on in there. The sight before me makes me see red. Nancy has made herself at home, in Sasha’s and my bedroom.

  “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” I demand through clenched teeth. I push my sleeves up to my elbows, the movements jerky with restrained anger. She looks up from where she is lying on our bed. Lying on our.fucking.bed.

  “Nancy, get in the kitchen, now!” I yell.

  She gets up and saunters into the kitchen, like she doesn’t have a care in the world. This woman is fucking insane. Bat-shit crazy. There is no other explanation for it. I follow her into the kitchen, pinching the bridge of my nose with my fingers. Boy, do I have some grovelling to do.

  “Why did you come here?” I start with.

  She shrugs. The motion infuriates me. “You said you wanted a divorce. I wanted to come and see why. Maybe we could work things out?” she asks, running her tongue over her lips. Instead of turning me on, my dick shrivels up even further, if that's possible. I slept with this woman once, and I’m sure as fuck never going there again.

  “What do you want?” I ask her frankly. I’m not stupid. The bitch is here for something.

  “I want some money,” she admits, glancing around and looking at my large house and nice possessions. I can almost see the dollar signs in her eyes.

  “What happened to your forehead?” I ask. It’s red and puffy.

  She scowls. “Slight altercation.”

  Sasha. I can’t help it, I smile.

  “Fuck you, James,” she hisses.

  I sigh and look up at the ceiling. “I am the fucking poster boy of why people shouldn't get drunk in Vegas,” I say to myself. Apparently it only takes one night and a bottle of scotch to ruin your life.

  “You could have said you wanted money before you signed the papers, why did you have to come here and fuck my life up?” I really want to know this.

  She shrugs again. She’s lucky I would never raise my hand on a woman. “When it’s all said and done, legally you’re still mine, James. Pissed me off some other girl is living here with you, enjoying all this,” she gestures to the house. “When it’s me carrying your last name.”

  I stare at her, my eyes narrowing. “I just want you gone. Out of my life, for good. You're a fucking mistake, poison. How much do you want?” I sneer.

  “Two hundred grand,” she says without even a flinch.

  “Sign the papers and I'll give you a hundred. But my lawyers will draw up a contract saying you can’t come near me or anyone I know again,” I tell her.

  “Fine,” she pouts. Ungrateful bitch.

  “Get out. Meet me at my lawyer's tomorrow, I'll message you the details,” I say, not even looking at her anymore.

  “You sure you don’t wanna fuck your wife one last time?” she purrs.

  I shake my head in distaste. “No way in hell. Bye, Nancy.”

  She stomps out and slams the door behind her.

  Good fucking riddance. Nothing feels better than cutting dead branches.

  ***

  Chapter Nineteen

  Sasha

  After driving around aimlessly for twenty minutes, I finally decide who I was going to crash with for the night. Who I wanted to comfort me right now. I press the doorbell to the mansion, and wait impatiently. After ringing it three times the door finally opens.

  “Hey!” I say in surprise.

  “Hey, Sasha,” Saxon says.

  “Is Ryder in?”

  “No, he went on a small trip with Lexi. Come on in,” he says, opening the door wide. I walk in and smile at the pictures of Ryder and Lexi smiling, hugging and kissing. So in love, those two.

  “You house sitting or something?” I ask him.

  “My new house is getting built, so Ry told me to crash here,” he says.

  “Oh,” I say, feeling sad Ry isn’t around. Who's going to hug me and tell me how much of a princess I am now?

  “You wanna talk about it?” Sax asks. I eye him warily. Sure we’ve met a bunch of times over the years, but we’ve never had any deep and meaningful chats.

  “Ry usually hugs me and tells me how amazing I am,” I say with a dramatic sigh. Saxon laughs, and takes a step closer.

  “Come here. How about I tell you all the things Ryder has said about you to me? Would that work?”

  “I would like that,” I say softly, my eyes starting to water.

  “Come here, Sasha,” he says sweetly, pulling me into his arms for a hug. I start sobbing uncontrollably, my body heaving with the effort. I am not a pretty crier. Instead of freaking out, Sax rubs my back in a circular motion, letting my tears drench his black singlet. He carries me into his arms and sits me down on the couch, taking a seat next to me.

  “What happened?” he asks once my sobbing is under control.

  “James is married.” I allow that to sink in before continuing.

  “He proposed to me when he was already married! Who does that?” I yell. Sax’s brown eyes widen and then narrow in anger. My gaze is drawn to the scar that goes through his left eyebrow. It gives him a sexy bad boy edge. I wonder how he got it?

  “Fuck,” he curses, eyeing me not with pity but with an apology in his eyes. What he could be sorry for, I have no idea.

  “Why are you looking at me like you’re the one to hurt me?” I ask, confused.

  Sax’s eyes widen at my observation, before he says, “Guy screws good girl over. Been there and done that. I guess, I dunno. I’m not completely innocent. I hurt a woman as good as you once, so while I sit here watching you cry, I want to hit James, but he’s not the only one who is guilty here, is he?”

  “Sax. Don’t let your past define you. Everyone makes mistakes,” I tell him, not liking the flash of sadness I see in his eyes.

  “I guess,” he says, but I can tell by his tone that he doesn’t agree with me.

  “Sax,” I start but he cuts me off.

  “Do you want me to tell Ry to come home?” he offers.
/>
  “No, you said you would tell me the nice things he says,” I remind him, the tears starting up again.

  “That’s right. He told me you were beautiful, smart, kind-hearted, feisty.” He raises his eyebrow at the last one.

  “I have my moments,” I say with a slight nod.

  “He told me that he loves you, a lot. That you will always be his baby girl no matter how old you get. When you had your son he was pissed that the father wasn’t there and you were alone. He wanted to fly over but then Trey spoke to him and told him that he was taking care of you,” he explains.

  “Sometimes it feels like family is the only people you can trust,” I say sadly.

  “That’s because you have a good family. Not everyone is as lucky, some have to make their own family,” he says gently.

  “I guess I am lucky that way.” We're both silent for a few moments, lost in our own thoughts.

  “What am I going to do about James?” I ask him, playing with the seam of my jeans.

  “I can’t answer that for you, Sasha, but you’re welcome to bring your kid and stay here with me,” he offers with a grin.

  “Really? We won’t cramp your style?” I ask him, surprised at the offer.

  Sax chuckles, and it’s a deep, musical sound. “No, you won’t cramp my style.”

  “I don’t want to interrupt any hot sex you may be having,” I say bluntly.

  “Hot sex?” he asks, raising his eyebrow, causing the ring to move.

  “Yeah, you know,” I make a hand gesture that could mean both nothing and everything.

  “No, I don’t. Please explain it to me,” he says, his eyes dancing with amusement.

  “You’re in a famous band,” I state.

  “Okay,” he says, drawing out the word.

  “And you’re, you know!” I try to explain.

  “I’m what?” he ask, his body shaking with laughter.

  “You’re a pretty good looking guy,” I say as casually as I can.

  More like fucking hot.

  “I’m glad you think so,” he says with a laugh, rubbing his hands over the stubble on his chin.

  “I’m serious!” I say.

  “I can tell,” he says, laughing. What's so funny right now?

  “What I’m trying to say is, I’m sure you have a… a healthy sex life. That wouldn’t necessarily stay within your bedroom walls. You know, a man like you would like to change things up now and again I’m sure…” I trail off, because Sax is laughing so hard the whole couch is shaking.

  “This is the last time I try and have a deep and meaningful conversation with you. I’m trying to pour my heart out to you, and you’re in crampz,” I huff, crossing my arms against my chest and tapping my foot.

  “Crampz?” he asks, grabbing his stomach like laughing so much has given him a stitch.

  “It’s something I heard my baby cousin say. Crampz, you know, laughing so hard you get a cramp,” I explain.

  Saxon just stares at me before throwing his head back and laughing some more.

  “What? Apparently it’s the new LOL,” I tell him with a shrug.

  “Are you always this cute?” he asks once his laughter has subsided.

  “Excuse me?” I sneer.

  “What?” he asks suddenly, playful demeanor gone.

  “Did you just tell me that I’m cute?” I ask.

  “I did. Is that a problem?” he asks, now obviously confused.

  “Well, yeah, cos it’s not a compliment. Cute really means ugly but interesting,” I explain.

  Sax looks at me with a blank expression for a moment. “Says who?

  “Says everyone,” I say animatedly.

  “Okay. Name someone,” he says, a smirk now forming on his lips.

  “Well, myself of course,” I say.

  “Apparently. Anyone else?” he asks, his laugh starting to make a reappearance.

  “Does there need to be other people?” I blurt out, when I can’t think of anyone else that shares my views.

  “Well, no. But you said there was.”

  “If someone else jumped off a bridge, would you?” I ask. Okay, I’m making no sense now.

  Saxon makes a choking sound. “I’m pretty sure that saying doesn’t have any relevance to what we're talking about,” he manages to get out.

  “You’re probably right,” I admit, sighing heavily.

  “Back to your initial comment, there will be no girls coming over, alright? Trust me it’s not an issue right now,” he says.

  I lean towards him to give him a hug. “Thanks, Sax, I had no idea you were so awesome.”

  “I had no idea you smelt like peaches,” he answers.

  “Sax?”

  “Yes, Sasha.”

  “Either your nipples are pierced, or they are just really happy to see me.”

  He bursts out in laughter.

  ***

  James

  She’s not answering her phone, and no one's seen her. And I’ve called everyone. Jye is safe at Sasha’s mother’s house, but she's nowhere to be found. Ryder is out of town so she’s not with him, otherwise that would be the first place I think she would have run to. I sit down on our bed and place my face in my palms. I need to fix this, and stat. The past is not going to repeat itself, I’m not going to let Sasha leave me without hearing me out first.

  I rock up at Chase’s house to make sure Layla isn’t hiding her. Chase chuckles when I search all the rooms but I wouldn’t put it past Layla. I realise coming here was a mistake when Layla starts demanding answers and wearing that ‘worried’ face of hers.

  I head back home, feeling slightly defeated. Is she okay? I know Chase is an expert ‘stalker’ as I like to call it, but I don’t wanna go all caveman on her. I usually save that for the bedroom. I leave the front light on, in case she decides to come home. I want tomorrow to come so I can sign the papers and get rid of Nancy once and for all. Then I can go and claim my woman.

  ***

  Chapter Twenty

  Sasha

  “Why do men always cook breakfast shirtless? Is it because they like to live on the wild side or something?” I lower my voice in a ridiculous attempt to sound masculine. “Look at me I'm a man! I’m too manly to put on a shirt to avoid oil splashes!” I say sarcastically. Saxon shakes his head at me, and flips the bacon over.

  “I hope you’re cooking a lot,” I say as I peer over his shoulder at the frying pan.

  “I am, don’t worry. Sit down, Sasha,” he mock scolds me.

  “Fine,” I say, ungracefully plopping down on the breakfast bar stool.

  “How did you sleep?” he asks as he cracks an egg.

  “Fine,” I say.

  “I could hear you crying,” he says softly.

  “That’s not very gentlemanly of you to mention that,” I point out.

  “I’m not doing it to be mean, I just wanted to know if you uh, wanted to talk about it,” he mentions casually, with a slight shrug like it doesn’t bother him either way.

  “Are you always this kind to weeping women,” I evade.

  “Not always. Well, I mean, I’m trying to be a better person. Plus, you’re Ryder’s baby cousin. So you’re like family to me, too,” he says. He walks over and places a plate in front of me. Bacon, eggs, mushrooms, sausages and chilli sauce.

  “Someone needs to husband you, stat,” I say, giving him a beaming smile.

  “There it is,” he says.

  “What”” I ask around a mouth of bacon.

  “A smile,” he says as he sits next to me, taking a bite of his own food.

  I moan around another bite and look over at Saxon. Tattoos, piercings, spiky brown hair - even first thing in the morning, the man is attractive I’m not gonna lie.

  “What’s your story, Sax?” I ask him. I heard he used to date Lexi, or something like that.

  “No story,” he says, eyeing me under his thick dark lashes.

  “How’s Kidd?” I ask him.

  “He’s good. He might drop b
y sometime this week if you’re still here,” he says.

  “I have to go and pick up Jye today, I’ll need to go home and get my things. I’m not sure where I’ll end up staying tonight,” I grumble.

  “Well, you’re always welcome to come here,” he offers kindly.

  “Thanks, Sax,” I tell him honestly.

  “Don’t thank me, it’s your cousin’s house,” he says, a smile playing on his lips.

  “Yeah, but you lent me your awesome T-shirt to sleep in,” I remind him. It’s a Morning Alliance one. And I’m so not giving it back.

  “Yes, you can keep it, Sasha,” Sax chuckles, his eyes twinkling.

  “Did I ask you?” I’m pretty sure I didn’t.

  “No, but I could see the look in your eyes.” He smirks as he say it.

  “Oh,” I say, standing up and collecting my plate.

  “Yes, oh. Don’t ever try and play poker,” he chuckles.

  “I’ll try to remember that,” I say with an eye roll. “I’ll clean up.”

  “Don’t worry about it,” he says. He's so damn sweet!

  “No way. Plus, it will give me something to do,” I tell him, grabbing his now empty plate as well. I clean up the entire kitchen, scrubbing things that are already clean. I wash and dry my clothes so I can wear them again, have a quick shower and then redress. I walk past Sax’s room and hear him playing The Script’s ‘Breakeven.’ He has such a beautiful voice, and I’ve never heard it before.

  Sax plays the drums and sings back up for Ryder, but I’ve never heard him sing solo. The song makes my heart break. Is it for Lexi, is he not over her after all? Someone rings the door bell, jolting out of my thoughts. I quicken my pace, peeping through the peephole to see who it is.

  It’s James. How did he find me?

  I open the door and narrow my eyes at him.

  “How did you find me?” I ask him, crossing my arms over my chest in defiance.

  “We need to talk, baby,” he says, looking apologetic.

  “Where’s your wife?” I bite back.

  “I can explain,” he says, taking a step towards me.

  “I’m sure you can, James. The thing is, you had a lot of time to explain, but you didn’t.”

  “I didn’t want to hurt you,” he tells me, his eyes pleading with mine. I almost want to forgive him with the look he’s giving me.