That’s fine. I’ll get to look at his fine ass.
Ivan sat beside me, bouncing his knee as his brow creased with his nerves. “I hope he’s okay,” he said, taking deep breaths.
I couldn’t help but chuckle. “I think you’re more nervous than he is. Take a breath, Vanya. Foss will do great. He’s been workin’ hard.”
“True.” He nodded. “This means so much to him, and I want him to do well.”
“He will.”
Mom sat on the row in front of us, taking pictures with her phone. Dad smiled at her and rested a hand on her thigh.
“Mind if I sit?”
I looked up to see Johnny. That beard was unmistakable. “Not at all.” I scooted over a bit to give him more room. I got Ivan’s attention. “This is Johnny, Remi’s friend. Johnny, this is my brother, Ivan.”
They shook hands and exchanged a polite greeting.
“Remi will be happy to see you,” I said to Johnny.
“That boy is like my son,” he responded in a gruff tone. “I wouldn’t miss this for anything in the world.”
“I’m glad he has you,” I said, thinking of Dale Barnett. That man might’ve shared Remi’s blood, but from what I’d learned, he’d never been much of a dad.
Johnny cocked his head at me. “Same about you. He’s different than he used to be. Happier. You’ve brought out a side to him I’ve never seen. I pray you don’t hurt him. That kid’s had enough heartache in his life.”
“I won’t hurt him.”
It was a vow I’d never break.
Two minutes before the concert started, the band members filed onto the gymnasium floor, which was covered with a blue tarp to keep the floor from being scuffed.
“Yep,” Ivan whispered. “He’s nervous.”
Foster was the fourth one in the line and took a seat on the first row. Even from a distance, I saw his cheeks puffed as he blew out a breath. The girl beside him bumped his shoulder and smiled, which he returned before searching the audience. Ivan and I waved our arms in the air to get his attention. Right when he saw us, Foster beamed. His nerves seemed to subside a little too.
Another group of students came from the other door and stepped onto a raised platform. The choir. Remi had told me they’d be performing several songs as well. The choir teacher, Laura, walked forward and spoke quietly to them.
Remi took his place in front of the band section, and I admired how great his ass looked in the slacks he wore. His long-sleeved, button-up shirt was tucked into his pants, and when he looked over his shoulder at the seats of people, I saw he’d worn a red bow tie. The same one I’d had a lot of fun taking off him when we were in New Orleans.
“Wow,” Ivan said.
“What?” I asked, seeing the arch of his brow.
“I’ve just never seen you smile so big before.”
My cheeks heated, and I looked away from my brother as the lights above the audience dimmed. The choir opened with the first song, done a cappella. The band added musical accompaniment for the second song, one from Phantom of the Opera. My heart beat harder in my chest when I saw Remi playing the piano for the song. I hadn’t known he’d be performing too.
Then it was time for the Disney medley.
Foster rose from his chair and stepped forward where a microphone stand stood. Ivan grabbed my leg and squeezed. He was being such a dad. Foster took a breath and lifted the clarinet to his lips. A strap was around his neck to hold the instrument as he played. The first note rang out, followed quickly by the second. Ivan’s nails dug into my leg when Foss messed up on the third note. But Foster recovered and kept going.
Mom was recording it on her phone, and when his solo ended, before the rest of the band came in, she yelled, “Well done, sunshine!” in Russian.
Foster smiled at the audience and rejoined the section to continue the song.
Once the concert ended, people left the stands and gathered on the gym floor while others stepped out of the room and into the cafeteria that was on the other side of the wall. Mom threw her arms around Foster and kissed his cheeks. Dad clapped him on the back and congratulated him on a job well done. Ivan hugged him, and then I ruffled his hair.
I searched the crowd for Remi before finding him speaking with parents about ten feet away. They talked, and he listened with a kind smile. I strode over just as I heard the man say, “Thank you for all you’ve done for Dillon, Mr. Barnett. Being in band has helped him straighten up.”
“Dillon’s a great kid,” Remi responded, blushing at the attention.
When he was alone again, I stepped toward him. “Hi.”
“Hi,” he said, reaching to grab my hand.
“Ready to meet my parents?”
“As ready as I’ll ever be.”
Holding his hand, I led him over to them. “Mom, this is Remi.”
“It’s lovely to meet you, Mrs. Foley,” Remi said, sticking out a hand.
She gently knocked his hand aside and pulled him in for a hug. “No shaking hands. You’re family now. Please call me Natalia.”
Dad then shook his hand. “I’m Alan. You’re still comin’ over to the house after this, right?”
“Yes, sir,” Remi said.
“Good. Good. Nat’s cookin’ pirog for supper. She only brings that recipe out for special occasions.”
“I’m sure it’s wonderful,” Remi responded, polite as ever. “I can’t wait to try it.”
Johnny approached next and spoke to Remi before introducing himself to my family. Mom invited him to dinner too, which he accepted.
Ivan, Foster, and my parents left shortly after, but I stayed to help Remi clean up the gym floor. We had to take the chairs back to the band room and then disassemble the stands the choir had used.
“Thanks for your help,” Remi said, once we’d stacked the last chair in its place. “You didn’t have to.”
“I wanted to.” I kissed his cheek. “I do believe my mother is smitten with you by the way. She doesn’t make pirog just for anyone.”
“What is it?” Remi asked. We exited the band room and moved down the hall toward the exit.
“A type of Russian pie that can be sweet or savory. Mom makes hers with cabbage and chicken.”
“Sounds great.”
Remi and I arrived a little after two that afternoon, and Mom greeted him with another big hug. When she had asked me about Remi, I had said he’d lost his mother when he was young. She had then said that she’d just have to show him extra love because of it.
“Come, come,” she said, looping her arm through his and taking him to the kitchen.
Remi looked at me over his shoulder with wide eyes. I smiled and followed after them. Mom had already prepared most of the pie before we got there, and she showed him how to make the rest of it before she put it in the oven to bake.
“I think your momma has kidnapped your boyfriend,” Dad said, coming to stand beside me. Mom had taken Remi over to the wall of family photos and was telling him about each picture.
“She’s so excited,” I said. “Makes me feel kind of guilty for not bringin’ a man home sooner.”
“Ah, don’t feel guilty. You waited for the right man. Your granny hounded me too about finding a good girl and settling down. I partied and refused to settle with anyone.” Dad’s eyes glimmered with what I could only describe as love. “Then I met Nat and knew I’d found the woman I was gonna marry.”
“You knew that soon?” I asked. He’d never told me this before.
“Sure did. Mind you, at first the communication was… interesting to say the least.” He chuckled. “Nat barely spoke English, and the only Russian I knew was from movies. But we made it work. When we found out she was pregnant with you, I dropped down on one knee and asked her to marry me. I was a nineteen-year-old kid training to be a Marine and had no money to my name, but she said yes anyway. Until I could afford a proper engagement ring, I welded her one out of a piece of scrap metal and tied a brown leather strap around the band. She still
has it.”
I knew the ring he was referring to. Mom still wore it sometimes.
“What about this one?” Remi asked my mom, pointing to a picture of me sitting on the ground with a bike helmet on and crocodile tears in my eyes. A tiny scrape was on my knee.
Mom laughed and touched the photo. “Jay asked so long for a bike, and we bought him one for his seventh birthday. He was on it for no more than five minutes before he fell and scraped his knee. Such a tiny amount of blood. He cried so hard, thinking the bleeding would never stop and that he’d bleed to death.”
Remi chuckled and met my gaze. My heart nearly burst at the tenderness in his eyes.
“Uncle Jay!” Foster ran through the front door and wrapped his arms around me before stepping back. His glasses were skewed on his nose.
“Hey, Foss the Boss.” I ruffled his hair like I always did and then looked at my brother. “About time you showed up.”
They had gone to their house before coming over so Foster could change out of his dress clothes.
“Sorry,” Ivan said, jabbing at my side before throwing his arm around Dad for a side-hug.
“Yeah, Dad was busy talking on the phone,” Foster said.
Pain flashed in my brother’s eyes before clearing. But I’d noticed it and pulled him aside.
“Talk to me,” I said.
“It was Megan,” he answered. “She wants Foss to spend the summer in New York with her and her fiancé. If he wants to go, I don’t mind. I want him to see his mom.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“Well, she mentioned if he likes it there, she wants him to move in with her. And I can’t lose him, Jay. I wouldn’t be able to hold myself together.”
“You have full custody,” I said, shaking my head. “She can’t take him away from you, and if she tries she’ll have to deal with me.”
“Thanks.”
“I would do anything for you. You know that.”
“I do.” He gave me a hug and quickly wiped at his watery eyes and cleared his throat. “There’s something else I need to tell you, but I don’t know how.”
“Is it about Megan?”
“No. It’s about me.” Ivan’s chin shook and more tears surfaced in his eyes. “Never mind. Forget I said anything.”
“Tell me,” I pressed, feeling a hollowing in my chest. I could count the number of times I’d seen Ivan get this emotional on one hand.
“I…” He sucked in a breath and scratched the side of his head. “I’ve held this in for years, Jay. It’s hard for me to talk about. I don’t know where to start.”
“From the beginning.”
“All right. So. When I was deployed, there was another Marine I got close to. You remember me telling you about Asher?”
The Marine who’d saved Ivan the day he lost his leg. “Yes,” I answered.
Ivan nodded. “Well, we were there for each other through thick and thin. He and I… well, I… I think—”
“Dad?” Foster called from the living room.
Relief crossed my brother’s face, and he turned away from me. “Be right there, Foss.”
“Vanya.” I grabbed his arm. “This conversation isn’t over.”
“Later,” he said. “Not now.”
I’d hold him to that.
Ivan went to see what Foster wanted, and I found Remi on the back porch with my mom. She was showing him her garden. I slid my hand into his and walked with him around the yard as Mom talked about her flowers and all the things she planned to plant that weekend. The weather was perfect for planting, according to her.
When the food was done, we sat around the dining room table as a family and ate. Warmth traveled through me as I realized Remi was now a part of our family. We didn’t have to be married for me to know I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.
Johnny got there after dinner, apologizing for being late. He was a music professor at the college and had a one-on-one tutoring session he’d had to attend before coming over.
“Sit,” Mom told him, guiding him toward the table. “I’ll make you a plate.”
“You’re much too kind, ma’am,” Johnny responded.
Dad and Johnny then got to talking. They hit it off extremely well too. Apparently, Johnny had been in the Navy for five years before realizing he wanted to teach music. They exchanged funny stories from their days in the military, mostly revolving around men in their units and the stupid shit they’d done to entertain themselves during long voyages.
“Look at that,” Remi said with a smile, watching them.
Ivan sat beside them and joined into the discussion while Foster sat on the couch and played a game on his phone. What did Ivan need to tell me? Whatever it was seemed to freak him out. Something about his time in the Corps.
“Come,” Mom said, walking by us with a tray that had a teapot, three cups, and dishes with cream and sugar.
We followed her to the sitting room, which we got to by passing through a sliding door on the other side of the dining room. She poured us each a cup of hot tea and talked about her life in Russia before immigrating to America. I sat down beside my boyfriend and pulled his chair close to me, listening to my mom’s stories from when she was a young girl. Many I’d heard, but I still enjoyed them.
“I love your family,” Remi said later that evening as we drove to my house.
“They love you too.” I turned onto my street and pulled into the driveway three houses later. “Just like I do.”
“I’ll never get tired of hearing you say that.”
Sputnik walked around our legs as we entered the house before going over to his empty food bowl and staring at me. I fed him and scratched his back as he started to eat. Remi had still been in dress clothes and had gone to my room to change. I pulled my phone from my back pocket and texted Ivan.
You owe me a conversation.
He texted back. Forget about it, Jay.
No, I replied. You can talk to me about anything.
I will, Ivan responded. When I’m ready.
Was he in some kind of trouble? Not knowing was driving me crazy. I’d hope if it was something serious he’d tell me.
“Have you responded to Andrew’s message yet?” Remi asked, walking into the kitchen. He’d taken off his shoes and changed into his sleep pants. No shirt.
I looked out the glass doors leading onto the back patio. Andrew had messaged me the day before, and I’d immediately shown Remi, who had been in bed next to me when I saw the notification on my Facebook messenger.
“Not yet,” I said before sighing. “I’m not sure I even want to respond or what to say if I did.”
I exited the conversation with Ivan and clicked on the message from Andrew, reading it again.
Jay.
I apologize for the way things went in New Orleans. It was just as much a shock to me as it was to you. Though so many years have passed, you have often crossed my mind. I carry so much guilt for the way I treated you when we were together. I know you’re happy now. Your man cares about you a lot. I can tell. I don’t wish to ruin that happiness. I only wish to extend my deepest apology once again and hope that one day you can forgive me.
-Andrew
Remi slid his arms around me from behind and kissed my shoulder. “I support you in whatever decision you make.”
I covered his hand with mine and leaned back against him. “What would you do if you were me?”
“I can’t answer that.” Remi rested his cheek on me. “But I can say this. When I was in therapy, something my therapist said really stuck with me. You don’t forgive someone for their sake. You forgive them for you so that you can move on. That’s why I let go of the anger I carried for Dale. I’ve made peace with it.”
“The message from Andrew is a lot like the wedding invitation you got in the mail from your dad. Do we respond or not?”
“I wadded mine up and threw it in the trash.”
I turned in his arms and faced him. “I have nothing more t
o say to Andrew. I believe I have the closure I need.”
“Seems like you have your answer, then.” Remi kissed me softly before pulling away. He went over to the refrigerator and opened it.
“What are you looking for?”
“You owe me a demonstration.”
It took me a second to figure out his meaning. And then I grinned.
I went over and grabbed the bag of cherries and snatched one up. Without breaking eye contact with him, I ever so slowly slipped the cherry between my lips and pulled it from the stem before chewing it. Remi’s gaze darkened as his eyes followed the movement of my throat as I swallowed. Then I placed the stem in my mouth, working it with my tongue. When I opened my mouth, Remi peeked in and gasped.
“Holy shit.” He grabbed the tied stem and twirled it between two fingers.
“Impressive, right?”
“Very.” He placed the stem on the island and started walking backward, a taunting set to his eyes.
“Where are you going?” I asked.
“Why don’t you follow me and find out?”
Challenge accepted.
He turned and bolted down the hall as I chased after him. Going around the corner to my bedroom, he slipped on the hardwood floor and crashed into the door. I laughed so hard I nearly pissed myself. I reached him and our lips met, both of us still smiling from his little mishap.
“Oh,” I said, breaking from the kiss. “I have something for you.” I went over and opened the top drawer where I kept my ties. I grabbed the key chain shaped like a piano. The damn thing had been tucked away since February, and I’d completely forgotten about it until I’d found it earlier that day while looking for a certain tie. “I bought it for you when I was at the mall searching for Ivan’s birthday gift. Remember me sending you a picture?”
Remi accepted the key chain as I handed it over, and his smile was so bright that not even the sun could compare. He didn’t say anything.
“It’s stupid, isn’t it?” I said, messing with my hair as a nervous tic.
His Surrender Page 25