Supersonic

by Anouschka Zagorski

  “Yes, I know. I’m not sure that’s good for you though - I’ve never been rafting!”

  “Oh you’ll pick it up - it’s such fun! Apparently the bus leaves in half an hour.”

  “That leaves just enough time to check my emails.”

  Jessica pulled a face. “I’ll have to pop into the business centre and log in properly. Tracey wants me to send the revised fee letter to Francobank.”

  “Well then girls, off you go and do some work!” Jacob parked my trolley in front of my room and walked down the landing, looking for his room number.

  I unlocked the door to my room, rolled my suitcase in and looked around. It was a little on the rustic side, but clean and spacious. After having unpacked my few things and placed the files on the small desk, I pulled my blackberry out of my bag. Of course its little red light was blinking. I scrolled through my emails which also contained some instructions from Tracey addressed to Jessica and I. In fact they were instructions to Jessica, I was only to check her work. Sometimes I suspected that Tracey was particularly tough on Jessica precisely because she was the fiancée of a partnership candidate, so as to make sure she would get no ideas about expecting any privileged treatment. Jessica allowed it to happen - as if she wanted to prove that she would always hang on in there. Even following her breakdown and hospitalisation she hadn’t really made any adjustments to her working manner.

  I replied to several mails and then locked my valuables in the small safe. Looking at my watch, I realised it was time to go. I grabbed my waterproof anorak which I had specifically purchased for this occasion, stuffed my bikini into one of the side pockets and my blackberry, lipstick and handkerchief into my Louis Vuitton pochette (which in my view didn’t contravene Tracey’s instructions of ‘no handbags to the rafting!’) and ran down stairs to the bus where Tracey was waiting, again with the clipboard, but this time with a sour face.

  “It’s about time, Chloé!”

  “Sorry! I was only answering your emails, Tracey!” I triumphantly held up my blackberry and climbed on to the bus. She mumbled something and followed me.

  “There’s a seat next to me. You can sit there,” she reluctantly instructed me and pointed at the row behind the driver.

  “Thanks.”

  I plunged into the empty window seat. I turned around and saw Jessica sitting behind me. “Good, you made it! I saw you sent the fee letter; well done, sweetie.”

  She gave me a grateful smile. She pointed with her chin towards Tracey’s back, rolled her eyes and winked at me. Tracey was already emerged in her emails. I leaned back and concentrated on watching the road ahead of us in order to fight my usual travel sickness.

  When we arrived at the white water rafting station we were handed wet suits and helmets. All women had to change together behind a curtain. I found a corner and managed to put on my bikini discreetly. I couldn’t help but get a glance of Tracey’s pale English body and to feel a sense of pity. She suddenly appeared very vulnerable and was just a woman trying not to show her hang-ups. Jessica eyed my stomach.

  “My goodness, Chloé, it’s unbelievable that you have given birth to two children!”

  I shook my head, hoping that Tracey hadn’t heard that. Anyway I felt like I was cheating due to my botoxed forehead and that I didn’t deserve any compliments. I probably had as many hang-ups as Tracey, if not more. As far as I knew she neither went on a diet nor to the gym nor had any beauty treatments. Maybe she had the fortune to be convinced that she deserved to be loved the way nature had intended.

  I squeezed into my wet suit with great effort and joked about it in order to override Jessica’s remark. “Now I look like a real sausage!”

  We went outside for the group photo. With our safety helmets we all looked like right idiots. I noticed Jacob in the back row winking at me. I quickly protruded my chin so that my lips looked fuller and zipped up my life jacket a little which, rather painfully, but effectively, squeezed my breasts together; at the same time I gave him my best rehearsed smile, tilting my head slightly to the back. Indeed he understood, looked at my cleavage and grinned at me. Mike caught him looking at me and nudged him in the ribs. “Jacob, let’s see whether we can make Chloé fall off the raft into the cold water,” he said loudly so that I could hear him.

  “Ah-ha-ha! You’re so funny.” I shouted. He better not mean that. I had a flashback to a school outing, when I was in fifth grade. In my minds eye I saw a little ten year old me (in a yellow anorak, yuk, but at least with colourful wellies which I thought were really cool but all the children made fun of them) sliding into a muddy stream in the forest. The memory of my muddy wet trousers and the roaring laughter of my classmates made me panic.

  “Don’t worry, David and I have done this quite a few times,” Jessica encouraged me. “It’s just a question of technique.”

  Oh no.

  I rowed for my life. The raft of Mike’s team (including Tracey) came dangerously close a few times but we were able to avoid it.

  “Look, we are nearly there.” David pointed at the shore on the right where one of the organisers was standing and waving at us. On a meadow behind him they had set up marquees with long tables and benches. Smoke smelling of barbecued meat was rising from a large barbecue grill.

  “Yay! We made it!” Jessica cried happily.

  “No! Don’t stop rowing!” I screamed in panic because suddenly the raft of Jacob’s boss, Gunther White, appeared on our left.

  David and Jessica just turned around, dumbfounded. It was too late. The raft rammed into us with full force. David and Jessica managed to hold on but, since I was at the front, I fell into the water sideways. The last thing I saw was White’s amused face. I emerged from the ice-cold water with my mascara smeared and my hair soaking wet, making my colleagues roar with laughter. The water wasn’t deep but I wished I could have submerged in it for good.

  “Fuck it’s cold!” I stammered, while David gave me his hand with a suppressed grin in order to pull me onto the raft.

  I scrambled back to my seat. Despite the wet suit I was shivering from being cold. When, after a few more strokes, we reached the shore we left the raft to the organisers who showed us the changing tent where they had deposited our things. Once I had changed back into dry clothes and wrapped a towel around my head (having been told, by the mirror, that not only had part of my dignity but all of my make-up been washed down the stream) I strolled to the drinks buffet.

  “Where is the alcohol?” I asked the lady from the catering team when I only spotted soft drinks and water bottles on the table. She raised her eyebrows, frowned and pointed at the refrigerator behind her. “We’ve only got Beck’s beer.”

  I asked her to open a bottle of Beck’s for me and took a large sip. It was too bitter for my taste but the alcohol helped to return some of my coolness.

  “So, Mrs. Krakowski, everything alright again?” White appeared by my side. He was back in his corduroys and checked shirt.

  “Of course, the dip in the stream was nicely refreshing after the vigorous rowing exercise!” I emphasised casually.

  He nodded with satisfaction. “I knew you would be a good sport about it.”

  “At P&W you have to be prepared to jump into the cold water; harhar!” Francis Mayer added, joining us.

  “Ah-ha-ha. Unfortunately you missed the race, Mr. Mayer - as far as I know you were supposed to be on our boat,” I reminded him. I really felt like giving him a kick - no, actually both of them.

  “Ah, yes, unfortunate indeed. Important telecon. The client insisted on having me there.”

  Somebody put his hand on my shoulder. I turned around and looked into Jacob’s concerned face. “Is everything OK, Chloé?”

  I turned away from White and Mayer who were already being schmoozed by David. “Yeah. I’m alright, but that really wasn’t funny.” I looked at the ground a
nd kicked some bits of grass away. Don’t cry, Chloé, just because somebody shows you a little sympathy.

  He touched my upper arm. “Come. I have saved a seat for you at our table. I can also get you something to eat.”

  “That’s really kind of you. Thank you, Jacob.”

  He returned my smile ...nearly tenderly. Uh-oh. I knew that kind of smile. He was not flirting anymore. He really liked me.

  I followed him to a table at which Beatrice, Jessica and Mike were already sitting. As we were walking I noticed his broad shoulders and that the hair at the nape of his neck were slightly too long. I resisted the urge to lift my hand and touch the short soft curls. We sat down next to each other, not much space between us due to Mike taking up a large part of the bench. Neither Jacob nor I told Mike to make more room. It felt good to be close to him.

  “Oh, sorry,” Jacob said when our legs touched inadvertently. This time it was my turn just to smile at him.

  He did not leave my side again throughout the picnic.

  After the outing we all returned to the hotel by bus. Back in my room I unlocked the safe, took out my wildly blinking blackberry and scrolled through my mails. I saw that Francobank had negotiated, with Tracey, another fifteen per cent. discount off of our fees. Great. That wasn’t good news for my business case. The last email was about two minutes old and from Jacob. He asked me to join him and the others in the spa. I deliberated briefly. It would probably be wonderfully relaxing to warm up in the sauna. I replied “OK” and put my still damp bikini back on, covering myself with a big fluffy towelling robe that I found in the bathroom.

  The heated swimming pool outside was steaming invitingly, a contrast to the already snow-covered mountains in the distance.

  “We’re here, Chloé!”

  Jacob was standing in front of a small wooden hut at the other end of the pool with only a towel wrapped around his hips. I deduced that the hut was a sauna when the door opened and Mike stepped out looking very red in the face. “Phew! It’s fucking hot in there!” he laughed.

  “Please, tell me, who’s in there?” I asked Jacob when I reached the hut.

  “David, Mike, Tom, Roger and the new trainee - I don’t remember her name.”

  “Me neither. Ahem. Oh well, fine.” I took off the robe and hung it on a hook. I grabbed a towel form the shelves.

  “What, you are wearing a bikini to the sauna?” Mike held the door open for me.

  “You must be joking. I am certainly not getting naked in front of you!” He had some nerve!

  I stepped into the sauna room. It was dimly lit. Once I recovered some sight, in the semi-darkness, I nearly had a heart attack. Everybody was sitting naked on their towels - the trainee even with her legs drawn under her, offering a full view of her private parts. Oh. My. God. I quickly turned my eyes to the ground and sat down at the lower bench just by the door.

  All I could make out, from the corner of my eyes, was naked flesh and skin and... urghhh! Roger got up, poured water on the hot stones and started to swing his towel in the air in order to spread the hot steam. I covered my eyes with my hands.

  “Sit down, Roger! I don’t want to see you naked! Actually, I don’t want to see any of you naked!” I felt my panic rising.

  Everybody laughed. Then even Tom got up and started wiggling his bottom. “So, Chloé, you really don’t want to see us naked?”

  That was enough. I grabbed my towel and fled from the sauna. I quickly put my robe back on, relieved that I did not have to stay any longer.

  “Too hot, wasn’t it?” Jacob had followed me. He suppressed a grin.

  “That was disgusting! Eeek! Did you see the trainee?” I started laughing now, too.

  “Not her, only her beaver!” he cracked up.

  We were still laughing when the lift stopped at our floor. I held up my key. “Now I am going to have a nice long shower - dinner’s in an hour’s time. See you then?”

  “Shall we dine together - uhm, I mean share a table?”

  “Sure! See you later.”

  I unlocked my door. He walked on towards his room, turned around again and gave me a little wave with his hand. I felt all warm and fuzzy. Somehow I had the feeling I was no longer alone here anymore.

  My suspicions were confirmed as the evening progressed. Even Jessica noticed how much attention Jacob paid to me (“I think he likes you, Chloé, I have never seen him make such an effort for a woman!”). After dinner we all went to the hotel bar for cocktails. I found myself at the bar, surrounded by male colleagues and the female trainee (I could not get that picture out of my head anymore). Somebody ordered a round of Mojitos. Jacob took two, handing me one of them.

  “Let’s go over there - it’ll be quieter.” He slightly hustled me to the nearest pillar.

  “Cheers.” He clinked his glass with mine. “That was quite a nice day.”

  “Yes, surprisingly so. Except for my involuntary bath in the stream and the even more involuntary sightings in the sauna!” I shivered with disgust.

  “They did that partly on purpose, particularly Roger.”

  “Phhh. It’s like being in kindergarten.” I took a large sip from my Mojito. “Hm, yummy.” I eyed him up surreptitiously. Why hadn’t I previously noticed just how cute Jacob was?

  “How long have we known each other?” I asked.

  “Let’s see - that Australian deal was about five years ago. After that we exchanged a few calls and emails. For the last year and four months you have been my office neighbour. By the way, when we did that deal five years ago? I thought at the time that it was really totally sweet of you when you called me and offered your help.”

  “Really? I did that? I can hardly remember that telephone call.”

  “It was just before Christmas. We had to draft all these contracts at short notice and were under immense time pressure. I don’t know why but I told you then how crappy I thought that was and that I wanted to go and see my little son for Christmas. I remember very well, you said that you sympathised fully because you also had young children. You were so nice, I was really surprised, and somehow, it made me feel less depressed. I have never forgotten that.”

  “Oh yes. Now I remember. I thought it was very endearing that you told me about your son. It was a human moment in all that chaos.”

  His eyes beamed so warmly it touched my heart. On impulse I leaned forward. “I think I have to kiss you tonight,” I whispered in his ear.

  He grinned at me in happy surprise. “Really?” He put his left arm around me and stared at me intently. “Then go ahead,” he challenged me.

  “Not here, in front of all these people!” I replied indignantly, “but I was going to go back to my room soon anyway,” I said casually.

  “Chloé, all the guys think you’re hot. I’m no exception.”

  “Rubbish! That’s nonsense,” I protested in horror and glanced at our colleagues standing in the vicinity. “After what they did today?” I had a brief vision of Gunther White’s gloating face when I fell into the water.

  “No, it’s true. Believe me. Whatever - I would be proud if you chose me. Though I hope you know what you are doing.” His face took on a serious expression.

  I slightly leaned my head onto his hand, which was still around my shoulder. At that moment I felt very drawn to him. Then I slowly disengaged from his arm.

  “No idea,” I replied. “Let’s find out. Room 103.”

  I left the bar, without turning around, and went to my room.

  A few moments later there was a quiet knock on the door. When I opened it, Jacob was leaning against the frame. I grabbed him by his shirt and slowly pulled him in. We stood in front of each other and just looked at one another. He pulled a face. His lips trembled when he bent forward and found mine. He was no longer the cool wise arse but a vulnerable and sensitive perso
n. We kissed tenderly for a while. Then he gently nudged me towards the bed, causing us to fall on it together. When he started stroking my breasts I stopped his hand.

  “I’m not going to sleep with you,” I said.

  “I know,” he replied.

  I paused. “What do you mean you know?”

  “Because this is not about sex - well not only,” he grinned.

  I grinned back. “Fine. In that case you may kiss me.”

  And so he did.

  13. That’s Amore

  I have never been to Rome. I had saved this city for a very special trip - a romantic trip.

  * * *

  On the Monday morning, following our office outing, I sat at my desk at eight thirty, as usual, but this time with my heart beating fast. Jacob rarely appeared before nine thirty. So I had one hour to plan how I should behave when having to face him. I couldn’t help smiling when I thought back to the previous Saturday.

  We had spent the night talking, kissing and embracing each other. On Sunday morning we had taken our breakfast together, which nobody considered unusual. He also took the early train back home, whilst others planned to stay for the afternoon. On the train ride, Tracey occupied the row in front of us and he sat next to me. We kept holding hands, secretly, and exchanging tender glances. When we arrived at the train station, he declared he had to pop into the office in order to get his briefcase. Both Tracey and I had our cars parked there.

  “So whereabouts do you live?” I asked him as the three of us were travelling up in the lift.

  “Westend. Not far.”

  “That’s on my way. I can give you a ride if you want.” I was demonstratively casual. It was just a favour among colleagues. Tracey appeared to ignore us but one never knew with her.

  His eyes twinkled with conspiracy. “Oh - that’s kind of you. Thanks!”

  “Good. I just need to get a file from my office.”

  The doors opened. Tracey turned right. “Bye, you two. Have a nice weekend.”

  Or whatever was left of it, I thought. “Bye Tracey. Thanks, you too.”