YOURS TRULY

by Bella Grant

  He left without a word a few minutes later, a small bag in his hand. She didn’t call out to him, just watched him leave from her seat on the couch as devastation crashed over her. She heard his key turn in the door, his last opportunity to keep her safe.

  When his car was no longer in the driveway, she slumped sideways on the couch and sobbed harder than she ever had in her life. She let the anger, the sadness, and the fear of what might happen take over her soul and cried like she had lost a part of her heart.

  The crying jag subsided, and she rose to get a glass of water before going to bed in their empty queen. She saw the flowers immediately, abandoned on the counter where he’d left them when he got home and found her gone. She saw the small box, cutely wrapped with a little blue bow, and she decided to unwrap it, though she wasn’t sure she even wanted his gift.

  The sapphire ring she found inside was beautiful. The sapphire itself was small and surrounded by smaller sapphires in a setting that reminded her of a flower. The ring was silver, her favorite, and the perfect size for her right ring finger. She put it on, stared at it, and pulled it off almost immediately. She carried it with her to the bedroom, where she laid it inside her jewelry box. Her left hand caught her eye, and the ring on her third finger. With a wrenching sob, she removed her wedding ring as well and laid it beside the sapphire ring. She closed the box with a snap, the sound symbolizing finality and forever in her ears.

  Neither will be worn after today, she thought as a cloud fell over her spirit. Without showering off the cigarette smell, without even brushing her teeth or taking off her clothes, she lay on the bed and cried herself to sleep.

  Chapter 1

  “Happy Birthday!” Alyssa cried loudly over the noise in the bar/restaurant they had chosen for the milestone celebration.

  “Ugh, thirty,” Diana mumbled, tucking her shoulder-length brown hair behind her ear. “Can you believe it?”

  “You don’t look a day over twenty-one,” Alyssa told her, smirking when Diana raised an eyebrow. “Okay, twenty-five.”

  “More accurate, but not the truth.” Diana laughed, lifting her Cosmo to clink Alyssa’s rum and coke. Although they joked, Diana really hadn’t aged in the last few years, despite the rough patch that had lasted over a year after her divorce. Her hair, which was shorter, shone with health, and the small lines around her blue eyes were visible only to her when she was in a mood.

  Alyssa smacked her lips after sipping her drink and lifted her menu. “Today is definitely a cheat day,” she announced, smiling. “Not only is it your birthday, it’s Friday. I don’t have to weigh in until Monday.”

  “You make it sound like your job depends on your weight,” Diana told her, giggling as she too opened her menu. “I’m ordering an appetizer and a meal. I might even splurge on a dessert. A birthday brownie, perhaps.”

  “You can still eat anything you want and you never gain a pound,” Alyssa grumbled, scowling as she looked at the calorie count listed next to every item.

  “Stop looking at the calories and eat,” Diana admonished her. “We have Camp Gladiator tomorrow. You’ll work off everything you’ve eaten since Wednesday in that class.” Camp Gladiator was a fitness class that lasted for an hour and a half and designed for both cardio and strength training. Diana hated it, but she went for Alyssa.

  Alyssa hadn’t been lying when she’d commented on Diana’s metabolism. Diana was willowy, had been her whole life except during the month after her divorce when she’d quit eating and become dangerously skeletal. At 5’8”, she only weighed 120 pounds and desperately wished she weighed more because of the lack of breasts and hips. But she ate like a teenaged boy and gained nothing. She supposed she should be grateful for it and was when she scarfed down a large order of fries or ate half a pepperoni pizza by herself.

  “I’m thinking about this Cajun pasta…” she murmured as she glanced through the menu. She lifted her head and looked around the restaurant. They had never been here, but it was classic New Orleans with mostly Cajun food and specialty drinks with French names. The food that wasn’t Cajun was filled with Cajun spices, so essentially was Cajun. Returning her attention to the menu, she frowned. “Or maybe the shrimp etouffe. Or the crab cakes.”

  “Yeah, well, be careful. Now that you’re thirty, you might lose the advantage of a fast metabolism,” Alyssa warned unnecessarily, inserting her usual rude comment into every conversation.

  “Or maybe I’ll be skinny my entire life,” she retorted, winking to ease the comment’s snark. “I don’t know what you’re so worried about. You look like Marilyn Monroe!”

  “Yeah, but one bad food weekend, and I gain ten pounds,” Alyssa reminded her. “But you’re right. It’s your birthday. I’ll enjoy my food and drink tonight, and work my ass off in the morning.”

  “That’s the spirit,” Diana announced, returning to her menu and her decision. As she read, a table of men erupted into laughter, drawing her attention. She glanced in their direction without really looking at them and continued perusing her menu as she sipped her drink.

  The waitress stopped by a moment later, smiling brightly. “Hey, y’all need anything? Decided what you want?”

  Alyssa indicated that Diana should go first, and she ordered a spinach dip with tortilla chips for an appetizer and the etouffe for dinner. Alyssa ordered a peppercorn steak with steamed veggies, as off her diet as she would ever go, and they both asked for a second drink.

  “Oh!” Alyssa said excitedly when the waitress turned to leave. “Wait, today is her birthday!”

  “No, no, it’s not,” Diana replied quickly, shaking her head at the waitress, whose face had lit up.

  “Yes, it is, you liar!” Alyssa insisted. “Do y’all do something fun for birthdays?”

  “We do, but I think I’ll make it a surprise for this pretty girl,” the waitress said, winking at Diana and brushing a hand down her shoulder to her elbow, lingering there. “Don’t worry, it isn’t too embarrassing.” She sauntered away with a promise to bring their drinks back quickly.

  “You are such a bitch,” Diana said, laughing. “There is no way I’m standing on my chair and shaking my ass with an alligator on my head.”

  “You damn sure will,” Alyssa announced and wiggled her phone. “And I’m recording every second!”

  “By the way, I think the waitress was flirting with me,” Diana hissed, leaning closer.

  “You are such an egotistical bitch,” Alyssa smirked. “Everyone always flirts with Diana.” She ended with a raspberry noise with her tongue out.

  Diana tossed her napkin at her friend just as the table of men erupted into laughter again. The table was behind a wall, blocking her view of the majority of the men. The two she could see she didn’t know, but one of their laughs was familiar. She watched the table for a minute, waiting to see if the hidden two would poke their heads out, but no such luck.

  When she returned her attention to her table, Alyssa was watching her. “What?” she asked defensively.

  “You looking to get laid tonight? A little—well, hopefully not little—treat for the birthday girl?” Alyssa asked, wiggling her eyebrows in a funny way rather than suggestively.

  Diana snorted, shaking her head. “Um, no thanks. The two I can see are absolutely not my type. A little old.”

  “Yeah, but you don’t know what the other two look like, and when you’re horny, there is no such thing as a type!” Alyssa giggled.

  “Good Lord, Alyssa,” Diana murmured, glancing at the tables near them to see if she had been overheard.

  “Seriously, how long has it been since you’ve had sex?”

  “Longer than I like to think about,” Diana huffed. She missed sex. After her divorce, she’d waited nearly two years before dating. A couple of disastrous dates later, she decided a one-night stand or two might be better for her. She’d enjoyed a couple of fun nights with friends, but neither of them were men she wanted to date. So, she thought to herself after calculating, almost three years.
And I am not saying that out loud.

  Alyssa watched the group of men while Diana was lost in the memory, or lack thereof, of sex, and leaned closer to hiss, “There’s nothing wrong with the two I’m looking at. Except their ages maybe…”

  Diana glanced again when they laughed, frowning. “Man, one of them has a laugh like—” She bit her tongue and stopped herself.

  “Like who?” The waitress set down their drinks and the spinach dip. Diana hoped the interruption would refocus Alyssa on the food, but she looked at her with a mouthful of tortilla chip and spinach dip and asked again, “Like who?”

  The laugher erupted, and she heard the sound again. “Like Travis.”

  Alyssa jerked her head back, swallowing hard. “Ew. Why would think of that asshole after all this time?”

  “Because one of those guys sounds just like him when he laughs,” she answered quietly. “I’m surprised I even remember what his laugh sounds like.”

  “Please don’t get all sad tonight. Besides, I don’t really know why you would want to remember what he sounds like,” Alyssa said bitterly. “The man treated you like shit and let you go like you meant nothing to him.”

  Diana’s heart clenched a little at her words. “You know, it was a long time ago, but you don’t have to say that crap so callously. It still hurts my feelings.”

  Alyssa sighed. “The two of you split five years ago, Diana.”

  “Yes, five years ago today. Remember?”

  “I do remember because you remind me every year,” Alyssa grouched. She tilted her head and put a more sympathetic expression on her face when she saw a sheen glisten in her friend’s eyes. “I think it’s time you let go of that disaster and move on with your life.”

  “I have moved on with my life,” Diana grumbled, taking a longer sip of her drink than she meant to. Coughing a little, she covered her mouth delicately with her hand. “Damn. I think this drink is stronger than the last.”

  “That’s because I tipped the bartender to juice you up a bit,” Alyssa gushed, chuckling as she sipped hers carefully. After a shudder, she set her drink down. “I think he made mine stronger too.”

  “Well, hell,” Diana blurted with a snicker. “Who’s going to drive us home?”

  “We can Uber if we have to,” Alyssa assured her. “Our cars will be just fine here in the parking lot for one night. I’ll be right back. Have to go to the bathroom.”

  “You used to be able to hold your liquor better,” Diana called to her retreating back, and Alyssa flipped her off. Diana chuckled and shook her head, glancing around for any small children. They’d chosen to sit near the bar, though, so Alyssa hadn’t inadvertently corrupted a kid.

  As she scooped up a tortilla chip covered with spicy spinach dip, she allowed her mind to travel back in time to her life with Travis, despite the warning bells telling her not to. When they’d been dating and the first year of their marriage had been wonderful. They’d enjoyed each other and had spent every free moment together. But those free moments became fewer and fewer as he pursued what he called their dream. The idea of a big house with a pool and fancy cars and vacations had never been a part of her dream. She’d wanted to be with him, end of story, but he’d always wanted more.

  With a sigh, she acknowledged her part in the end of their marriage. She’d allowed her loneliness to whisper addiction in her ear, and rather than drugs or alcohol, she’d found gambling. Though it hadn’t destroyed her body, it had infected her mind as easily as a drug, and her credit had been destroyed. With her boss’ encouragement after a breakdown in his office, she’d attended meetings and classes once she realized her many mistakes would follow her for several years if she didn’t control herself. She never went to casinos or even bought lottery tickets anymore, but she was still at least a year away from paying off the debt she’d created.

  Thankfully, she had found a job that was high-paying and offered several benefits. The law firm she worked for was quite prestigious and handled high profile cases often. The specific lawyer she worked for, Cameron Rhodens, was a lesser partner in the firm and handled the lower profile cases, but he was rising slowly in the ranks and promised his staff they would rise with him.

  She received periodic bonuses, all of which she put towards her debt, and had insurance that rivaled the top companies in the country. Diana loved her job as an assistant to the lawyer whom she respected a great deal and who had helped her find the willpower to defeat her gambling issues. Many thought the two of them were having an affair until they realized Michael was gay and had a partner of ten years.

  The raucous sound of male laughter interrupted her reverie for the third time, and she wondered what the group of men could possibly find so hilarious, betting they were drunk and laughing at raunchy jokes she would appreciate more than she would admit out loud. Travis had always told her raunchy jokes, making her laugh and turn red at the same time. We had so much fun when we were young, she reminisced sadly as she sipped her strong drink.

  The man who sounded like Travis laughed again, but Diana shook her head. Her ex-husband—how she hated that term—wouldn’t be at a place like this. She had followed his career through mutual friends and knew that he had finally achieved his dreams. He’d made the money he had hoped for, bought the house he’d longed for, and was living in style while she lived in a crummy apartment in an effort to save money.

  When she heard about his successes, a twinge of jealousy had hit her briefly, but it had disappeared just as quickly. She was proud for him and of him. He deserved to be successful after all he’d been through. She reminded herself that while her life wasn’t exactly what she had expected it to be at thirty, she certainly couldn’t complain. Her only real regret was not having children yet, but her time would come, she was sure. He was single still as well, though she liked to think she really didn’t care about that fact.

  Alyssa slipped back into her side of the booth and blew out a breath. “There was a drunk woman puking in the bathroom.”

  Diana snorted derisively as she glanced at her watch. “It’s not even eight yet! She must have a weak constitution.”

  “I felt kind of sorry for her, but her friends were with her,” Alyssa said as she scooped up some dip and shoved it in her mouth, a long string of cheese on her chin. She wiped her chin with her napkin and looked around. “This place is crazy busy.”

  Diana joined her scan of the bar and said, “And not a good-looking guy in sight.”

  “Not that I saw, but I didn’t get to see the hidden pair at the loud table,” Alyssa replied, leaning precariously out of the booth to look at the table. She sat up with a huff. “Nope. No luck.”

  With a shrug, Diana mused, “Wasn’t meant to be, I guess.” She finished her drink and frowned into the glass. “You know, these are way too good and go down way too smoothly. I think I’ll have some water.”

  Alyssa shook her head. “It’s early! Have another.”

  “I don’t want to be the next embarrassing chick in the bathroom, thanks,” Diana asserted with a lifted eyebrow. “Who knows what’s on that floor? And kneeling there to puke where a million people have peed? All the bacteria! I’m literally making myself queasy.”

  Alyssa giggled like a silly girl and hiccupped. “Hmmm. Maybe I should have a water as well.”

  “Water with dinner, then back to drinking?” Diana asked, smiling broadly.

  “Amen!” They clinked their glasses together and signaled the waitress, who was at the next table.

  “Ladies, your food will be out momentarily,” the waitress began. “More drinks?”

  “We need a couple waters to balance the alcohol,” Alyssa told her.

  “Oh, good idea! I’ll be right back,” she chimed and hurried away, returning quickly with two tall glasses of water. “I checked and your food is just about ready.”

  “Perfect, thanks,” Diana answered, swigging nearly half the water as soon as the waitress turned away. “Damn, I was thirsty.”

  “All t
he salty chips,” Alyssa said, eyeing her. “You seem a little down. Are you still thinking about the asshole?”

  Diana decided to leave out Travis. “Actually, I was thinking I’m thirty and still don’t have a husband or children.”

  “Ew, why would you want either of those things?”

  Diana laughed at the horrified expression on her best friend’s face. “Because I want to grow old with someone, and I love babies and children.”

  “No thanks,” Alyssa said. “I like my life the way it is now.”

  “You meet the right guy, and I bet you change your mind.”

  “I doubt it,” Alyssa argued. “Men are good for one thing, and when they’re done, they need to go on back home.”

  “Slut.” Diana giggled. “No, I’ve had my single time. I think it’s time to start dating, not simply messing around.”

  “Well, good luck. The dating pool at our age is shallower than a Kardashian,” Alyssa quipped, pursing her lips at her joke. Diana snorted and rolled her eyes as the waitress reappeared with their food. The pair dug in, chatting about nonessential topics. After finishing their dinners, they ordered more drinks and sat back to relax and enjoy some people watching.

  “Look at that guy with the mullet,” Diana whispered, using her chin to point in the man’s direction. “Is that the new style?”

  “Apparently. I’ve been seeing it more and more,” Alyssa added as she glanced at the man. “It’s a shame, too. He’d be good looking without it.”

  “Eh, I don’t like the beard. I like men clean-shaven so his face feels smooth against my cheek,” Diana commented, leaning her hand against her face.

  “Nope. A beard is the way to go,” Alyssa replied, giggling when she added, “Tickles the inner thigh, if you get my drift.”

  Diana snickered behind her hand. “Oh, my God! You’re dirty!”