by Bella Grant
I closed my eyes in dismay. Ever since Greg had helped to find me this woman, we had been talking steadily. Every day we talked and learned more about each other, and there was still so much I didn’t know about her. We spoke a lot but rarely touched on personal topics, and that was what this date was supposed to be about. To take our ‘relationship,’ if I could call it that, to a next level.
I’d been so sure she wouldn’t mind my scars. She seemed so down to earth, not to mention the fact that she still had not uploaded a picture of herself. Warning bells had rung in my ears that maybe I wasn’t the only one with something to hide. Would I care if she was encumbered with a physical defect? For the first time, I put myself in the shoes of the other women I had tried to date and couldn’t answer that question for the life of me.
Robyn. I would go through life wondering about her, and I hated that. I would wonder what she looked like. If by chance I passed her one day, while she would recognize me, I still would have no idea who she was.
I doubled my fists at the bar where I was seated. I knew it was foolish for me to drive all the way to the restaurant when she hadn’t responded. The part of me that felt we had made a connection pushed me to leave the condo in the event she showed up. Plus, I already made the reservation, so if she didn’t show, I could always eat alone.
After this, I was done. How could I have so much angst over a woman I never met? She was so easy to talk to, and every day when I woke up, the first thing I thought of was texting her. In a weird way, when I thought of Robyn, I didn’t consider her appearance, but saw her in terms of her personality.
She hadn’t seemed to mind our conversations either. She had been fully immersed in them, responding to my texts constantly. She never let on if it was too late or too early to text her, and I allowed the momentum to carry me.
I scoffed to myself. No more late-night chats. No more going to work, my eyes red from lack of sleep as I had been in Canada, even falling asleep during an important meeting.
The beeping of my iPhone grabbed my attention. She had to be the one texting me. I hesitated, not certain I wanted to know what excuse she was coming up with for cancelling the date. I decided to ignore my phone. In fact, I turned it off without checking the message and cancelled the dinner reservation. I had no desire to dine alone.
I wandered to the bar and ordered a glass of bourbon, having every intention of leaving here drunk. I’d have to call Greg to come pick me up since I had driven his car instead of mine on this date. I’d decided not to tell Robyn about my wealth or give her the slightest clue I was a billionaire. As far as she knew, I worked with a telecommunications company, but she had no idea what exactly I did for a living. Based on her responses, she thought I was a salesman.
My mood blackened as the minutes ticked by at the bar. When I went home, I would delete that ridiculous app. I must have been insane, bordering on desperate when I’d allowed Greg to convince me this was a good idea. Why hadn’t I thought clearly about this? Rarely did online dating yield positive results.
I couldn’t tell how long I was at the bar, so immersed in my thoughts and wondering if I could have done anything differently to hold Robyn’s attention. I wasn’t nearly as drunk as I wanted to be and signaled to the bartender to pour me another drink.
“Seth?”
At the hesitant feminine voice, I swiveled around in my chair and saw a vision before me. And here I am lamenting I’m not drunk enough, I thought. Except the vision remained and she was looking at me expectantly as though I should know what she wanted and who she was.
“It’s me, Robyn.”
“Robyn?” I echoed, staring at her in despair. This was Robyn? No wonder she had rebuffed me after I sent her the picture. But if she had rebuffed me, why was she here?
My eyes drifted over her features with longing. She wasn’t average looking, as her profile stated. She was stunning. Her shiny, chestnut brown hair was in some kind of intricate plait, half-up with curly tendrils caressing her cheeks and neck. Her face was a little flushed, and she wore a shy smile. Her green eyes with flecks of amber were mesmerizing and warm. I almost trembled as I glanced from her heart-shaped face with the cleft chin and trailed my gaze over the rest of her form.
I was six feet and she measured a little below my shoulders. Her slender, compact body was fitted in a chic black dress that showed off the fullness of her breasts and the curve of her hips. I slowly lifted my gaze to her face, and her cheeks went even redder. I realized I had been scrutinizing her openly, embarrassing her. Didn’t I hate it when others did it to me?
“Robyn?” I asked, my voice hoarse in disbelief. “What… what are you doing here?”
She tilted her head to one side and smiled. “Did I make a mistake? I thought we had a date.”
Stupid. I berated myself as I tried to get my alcohol-infused brain to work. She had come. I couldn’t believe she had come.
“I, sorry, I just didn’t expect…” I trailed off, not knowing how to tell her she was hot without further embarrassing us both.
“Sometimes we expect too little,” she said, frowning at me. “I thought your battery died or something because you didn’t respond to my last message.”
“Message?” I parroted, then gathered my wits about me. “Oh, you mean that message.” I confessed to her, lowering my eyes in embarrassment. “I didn’t read it.”
“I see. You should.”
“Now?” I asked.
“Sure, why not?”
My hands felt clumsy and too big. I was all thumbs as I turned on my phone, having to wait a few minutes for it to boost. “I’m sorry, I thought you’d be a no-show,” I told her, elated. If she was here then she must not really care about my scars. Was that even possible when a woman looked as good as her?
“Why would I not show up?” she inquired, moving closer to lean against the bar while she observed me. She was looking at the bad side of my face and didn’t even bat an eye.
“It’s kind of obvious,” I responded and turned my attention to the phone now that it was on. I selected her message and opened it.
-Now you just went and ruined the mystery. Stop texting me so I can get dressed. I have a hot date!
I laughed, the sound one of relief as I read her message. I could scarcely believe my good luck. I’d been prepared for average, even a little below average. Great personality, great smile, and now she was just great, period.
“Now do we still have a hot date or what?” she questioned hopefully.
“Sure we, uh oh.” I remembered that I had cancelled the reservation. “I thought you weren’t coming, so I kind of cancelled our reservation.”
She shook her head in admonishment. “Next time read the message before you do something this silly. Have you been drinking?”
I smiled at her sheepishly. “A little.”
She raised one eyebrow. “I’d guess more than a little.” She reached out to take my arm and the current of attraction shocked me. Her eyes flew open, and she glanced up at me from where we touched and I knew she wasn’t faking it. For whatever reason, we were attracted to each other. I was relieved it was more than just an online conversation thing.
“Umm, I know this great place a couple minutes from here,” she told me. “We don’t need a fancy dinner. In fact, you may need more like a cup of coffee or something.”
“Hmm, you’ve been driving me to coffee a lot since recently,” I murmured and signaled the bartender for my bill. I paid him and left a tip before I turned to Robyn, who waited patiently for me. “I could try to get us another table,” I suggested.
“Are you really hungry?” she asked.
“For you.” The moment the words slipped out of my mouth, I stared at her in horror. “I’m sorry,” I apologized. “I didn’t mean to say that out loud. I’m hellbent on ruining our date.”
“It’s fine,” she assured me, chuckling. “I like your honesty. It’s very rare these days.”
“And to answer your question,” I rem
arked, “to be honest, again, I think I’m too nervous to eat much.”
“I know, so am I,” she admitted, going so far as to link our arms as we walked out of the bar and exited the restaurant. Having her so close to me was killing me. Her lithe frame brushing against my side and the gentle lilac scent of her perfume flooded my nostrils. “All the way here, I hoped you would be the same guy I chatted with on the phone.”
I couldn’t believe how easy it was to converse with her as we made small talk, walking to the little café she recommended. We mostly referenced our previous conversations over the phone. I scrutinized her as we spoke, trying to catch a look of disdain or disgust on her face. I still found it unbelievable that after sending her the picture, she was here and not repulsed in the least by my scarred face.
At the little café, which I’d never been to before, we took our seats and ordered coffee and sandwiches.
“If I’d known we would end up here,” she joked, “I would have spent less effort deciding what to wear.”
“It wouldn’t matter,” I told her, my tone serious. “You’re extremely beautiful.”
She must have heard that a dozen times or so, but the sincerity of my voice caused her to duck her head shyly. “Thank you, but beauty is only as beauty does.”
“Why’d you come?” I could no longer refrain from asking the question.
“I didn’t see a reason not to,” she answered, looking me straight in the eye as she spoke. “I’ve enjoyed our conversations.”
“And this doesn’t bother you?” I gestured to my face, deciding to bring it all out in the open because I didn’t want to get attached to her for her to decide later on she couldn’t date someone who looked like Frankenstein’s great-great-grandson.
Before she could respond, our waitress arrived and placed our order on the table. As she served us, I saw the question in her eyes. She tried not to stare at me, but failed miserably.
“I guess you get that all the time?” she asked when the waitress left, lifting her coffee for a sip.
“Yes, I do. One would think I’d be used to it by now.”
“I’m sorry. People can be such asses,” she said, and I saw something like pain in her eyes. “My boyfriend-” she started then stopped as she tried to gather herself.
I was alarmed by the words ‘my boyfriend.’ I felt the earth shifting beneath my feet and was glad I was sitting. Too damn good to be true. I couldn’t assume, though, that she wanted more than friendship because she had shown up and stayed. She might just be a really nice woman.
“You have a boyfriend?” I croaked, perturbed.
“No,” she denied with an embarrassed smile. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have started and stopped, but it’s a little hard to talk about sometimes.” She inhaled a deep breath. “My boyfriend died after a skiing accident,” she explained. “Like you, he suffered disfigurement as well as paralysis, but he couldn’t live with it and committed suicide.”
“Oh no!” I exclaimed, shocked. “That must have been horrible.” I sobered and confessed something I had never told anyone, not even Greg. “I can’t say I never thought about it. That would be a lie, but I was too much of a coward to do it.”
“No, you’re strong for not doing it,” she refuted, placing a hand over mine on the table. “I wish he hadn’t, and I would have tried talking him out of it had I known, but it was his call and he made it.” I teared up and blinked furiously. “The world is a shallow place, but every now and then we come across people who accept us with our flaws and imperfections. In fact, I think they can make us stronger individuals.”
“It’s easier being in a world when you’re as beautiful as you are,” I returned more factually than condemning.
She gave a short laugh. “You’d think that, right? But being beautiful invites all sorts of problems. Attracts the wrong sort of people.”
“You mean the wrong sort of men?” I asked more specifically. “Is that why you joined the site and didn’t post a pic?”
She hesitated and glanced away, a move I didn’t understand before she answered. “Umm yes. It was recommended to me by a friend.”
“No kidding, same here.”
We shared a smile that warmed me to the tips of my toes. We continued munching on our sandwiches and turned off the serious talk for the rest of our date. Our conversation consisted of things we had in common and those we didn’t. We chatted for hours, and I’d had several cups of coffee before she announced reluctantly that she should be getting home.
“Why? You don’t have a husband waiting for you at home, do you?” I half-joked as I paid our bill, dismissing her offer to help with the tab. I’d never been on a date with a woman before who offered to help pay the bill, and it was refreshing.
“Nope,” she answered with a grin as we stood and left the café. “Just a younger sister who subtracts a year from my life expectancy every week.”
I chuckled, then sobered. “I’d give anything to have my brother back.”
“You lost your brother?” she asked in alarm. “How sad! As much as my sister is a pain in the ass, I couldn’t imagine life without her. She sure makes it colorful.”
“It was a long time ago,” I said as we took our time crossing the street to get back to the parking lot of the other restaurant where we should have dined.
“Maybe someday you’ll tell me about it,” she suggested. “You seem to have suffered a lot.”
“Hmm.” If she only knew the half of it.
We continued to the parking lot in silence and stopped by her car, a modest silver Fiat.
“Seth,” she said, turning to me after opening the door. “I enjoyed tonight.”
I already sensed she had, but hearing her confirmation filled me with giddiness. This woman made me happier than I had felt in a long time.
“So did I,” I replied with a smile. “We’ll have to do this again.”
“If you can refrain from cancelling the reservations,” she teased me.
“Yea, right, make fun of me for getting cold feet.”
She smiled at me awkwardly which I couldn’t read. I tilted my head to the side, wondering what was going through that brain of hers. I didn’t have to wonder for long.
“I would make the first move and kiss you,” she admitted breathlessly, then gestured to our height difference with a laugh. “I’d kind of need some help here.”
“Would be remiss of me not to render assistance,” I agreed, and before she could respond, I kissed her. I intended it to be a soft, chaste kiss, just a meeting of the lips for a brief moment before we parted. Instead, the second our lips touched and she opened for my questing tongue, I could no longer deny her what we both wanted.
I didn’t want to scare her with the depth of my passion. My heart pounded in my chest from the effort it took me to bridle the lust driving need to my staff, which stiffened between our bodies. She released a little moan and clutched my upper arms, and I was lost. I itched to cup her ass, which I had noticed as we walked back was round and curved out from the dip in her lower back. I instead placed my hands on her hips, loving the feel of her against my body.
I lost track of how long we kissed. Each time we parted a little so we could gulp in much needed air, we ended up kissing again. Only my painful erection bumping her stomach made me pull away from her. I stared down into her face. Her eyes were half-closed and heavy with need. I could make out the peaks of her breasts pressing against the fabric of her dress, and her mouth was plump and red from my kisses.
“Good night, Robyn,” I wished her and opened the car door for her to get in. I saw her fingers tremble as she inserted the key into the ignition as I closed her door firmly.
“Good night, Seth,” she murmured and waved as she drove away. I must have stood rooted to the spot in the parking area fifteen minutes after she had left, stunned that I’d met the woman who could accept me with all my scars.
Robyn
At the buzzing of my phone, I reacted quickly and grabbed my h
andbag even though my brain was telling me to slow down. The sound was that of a text message, and I wasn’t likely to miss it as I would a call, but I was so anxious I had to see who the message was from. I hadn’t heard from Seth in three days. I rummaged through my bag and triumphantly grabbed the small device slowly consuming my life. Ever since Seth.
I pressed the button at the top to light up the screen and slumped when I saw the text was from my sister. Since I already had the phone in hand, I drew the pattern to open it and tapped the message to read the content.
Went home. Told Greg I was sick. I can’t be around him and this place knowing he’s manipulating you.
My sister catching a conscience when it was too late didn’t shock me. I was in this deep, whatever this was that Greg had dragged me into. And the worse part of it was that I enjoyed talking to and spending time with Seth. He might not have felt the same, though or he would have contacted me.
I escaped Kelly’s message and tapped the message link for the chat between Seth and me. I frowned at the last message he had sent me.
Will be out of town for a few days. Unforeseen circumstances.
His text had seemed rushed. Yeah, right, maybe rushed to get rid of me. I didn’t get it. For one, if he wasn’t interested in me and had sent me that message to give me the cold shoulder, I should be relieved, not bummed. Yet I couldn’t help wondering what I had done wrong for him to change his mind about continuing to see me. I couldn’t think of anything. I thought the kiss at the end of the night had been perfect. Then he’d called when I was home and we’d spoken through the night.
Even if he was out of town for a few days, we had internet and mobile phones. We could communicate from almost anywhere. I doubted he would go somewhere so uncivilized he couldn’t use his cell.
Stop worrying about Seth, I chided myself. Our lack of communication was a good thing. Greg couldn’t hold me to this stupid blackmail if his friend wasn’t interested in me. I could hardly do anything about that. For all I knew, he had found another woman on that dating site, met her, and decided she suited better than me. I knew he was self-conscious about his scars, but even with them, he was a handsome man. And if women were shallow enough to let that deter them from going out with him, it was their loss.