The Skies of Mahdis

by Rayne Forrest

  She sat and he poured her zhecr for her. “What's happened, Q'winn? Just tell me."

  He gusted out a long breath. “The new ship, Elsu, is ready for a specific test. They've asked me to take her out for it. I've agreed."

  Trista couldn't suppress the chill of foreboding that swept through her. “When do we leave?"

  "I'm sorry, love. You cannot go with me. I will only be gone overnight. I would rather you stay here and gather the last of the things you wish to take on the Anakin."

  "Just overnight, huh? Well, I guess I can stand that. And I will unless you tell me Vanteen is going."

  "Oh, no. She is not. I'm not taking W'eylin either, I don't think. The three of you will have enough to do here.” She managed to smile at him when he caressed her cheek with his knuckles.

  "Can't someone else do it?” she asked. She already knew the answer. With a scheduled flight of his own so close, they would not have asked him unless he were the only one available. She sighed.

  "I did ask. But I'm the only kaden in Mahdis right now.” He smiled at her. “You'll get a good look at a lander-craft. They'll bring it in and let it hover just outside the Keep."

  "And they'll drop a rope for you?” she said, trying to smile.

  "Almost correct.” He lifted her chilled hand to his lips. “It's only one night, love."

  "I know.” She met his gaze. “Feed me and we can go back to the fire.” And I'll never let you go again, she added silently.

  "I can do that,” he said as he leaned forward to kiss her.

  * * * *

  It rained again in the night. They listened to the wind blow the rain against the shutters and snuggled down further in their blankets. They made love, a silly encounter full of exaggerated moans and groans and laughter that finally left Trista sated, smiling and sleepy in Q'winn's embrace.

  She woke in the night and lay feeling uneasy as she watched the glow of the embers fade. She was afraid of Q'winn going on this flight without her. Afraid for him. And she couldn't shake the feeling.

  She wondered if it was perhaps fear of being on Dannar without him. She examined that as closely as she could, and that was not it. W'eylin and Vanteen would be here and Q'winn was correct. They could, and would, attend to those remaining domestic chores. She'd miss him, but she'd certainly manage. It was near dawn when she finally fell asleep again.

  Q'winn was already up when she woke. There was hot zhecr brewing and two mugs set out. She slipped into the alcove and the tea was ready when she came back out. She poured the steaming liquid into the mugs and stepped out onto the small balcony Q'winn's rooms boasted.

  The rain had left Mahdis misty and fresh. A tub of hardy flowers glistened with raindrops. A small, brightly colored dorri perched on the far end of the balcony and chirped a welcome.

  Q'winn stood framed in a shaft of the misty morning light. His hair lifted as the breeze shifted. Despite the damp and the morning chill, he was barefoot and shirtless. He smiled at her as she walked to him, holding out the mug. His eyes were full of warmth, full of the night they'd shared.

  "Aren't you chilly?” she asked him. He was actually standing in a small puddle.

  "I'm freezing,” he admitted and shivered as if to prove his words. “I didn't expect you to come out here and get chilled. Go inside."

  Trista nodded her agreement and he followed her back in. She watched as he quickly stirred the fire and got it going again. Then he flung a blanket over his shoulders and joined her at the table.

  "Do you know what needs to be finished today?” he asked.

  Trista wanted to glare at him but she nodded. He was no doubt trying to be helpful. She found it annoying.

  "The Anakin is back,” he told her. “C'ollin D'arar and his crew are disembarking. The technicians will look her over and my crew will be filtering in as their stations are approved."

  "Why can't this C'ollin make the test flight?” she asked innocently.

  "C'ollin has had a long flight. It would not be fair to ask him to take the Elsu after being out for two years. It's possible the jump home has left him too tired mentally to perform the test."

  Trista was confused. “What do you mean he was out two years?"

  The tight, closed look on Q'winn face spoke volumes to her. This was something he had not wanted her to know. It was one of the things he refused to tell her.

  "How could he be gone two years? It's only been a few weeks. What do you mean?” She was amazed her voice was so steady. She had a cold ball of fear, and anger, growing in her belly.

  "Trista, there are some things I've been reluctant to tell you."

  She sprang to her feet knocking her chair over backwards. “Oh, cut the crap!” she yelled at him. “I know you keep secrets. Lots of them!” She stalked away from him to stand in front of the fire. She whirled and rounded on him.

  "Why would you lie to me? Just a few weeks ago you passed over your spot in the rotation. You told me. I clearly remember us talking about it."

  He put her chair back on its feet and motioned to her. “Please, love, sit down. I will try and explain this to you."

  It seeped into her awareness that he'd not denied lying to her.

  "Don't talk to me like I'm stupid, Q'winn,” she said, her words clipped with her anger.

  "You are not stupid. I'm sorry if it sounded that way to you."

  "And stop trying to placate me!” She slapped her palms on the table.

  Q'winn regarded her quietly for several moments. “Do you want to learn about this? I will tell you. But you cannot speak of it."

  "Yeah, yeah. Secrets all the way around. I wouldn't trust me either!"

  "I do trust you. I have trusted you with my life."

  "That was your choice. What choice did I have, Q'winn? What choice did you give me?"

  "I gave you every choice I could."

  "And you think that's been enough?"

  The way he flinched startled her and brought her up short. She met his gaze and could see the hurt she caused. She swallowed hard.

  "I want you to tell me how it can be that a man who left here a few weeks ago could be gone two years.” She reached for his hand but he pulled it away.

  He stood abruptly and reached for his shirt. She watched as he finished dressing and opened the shutters that covered the window above the courtyard. He looked out for several minutes, then came back to the table with her.

  "When we went to space and began to find other worlds, other races, we were ignorant. And more fortunate than we knew. The first race we met were the Okarrans. We became friends with them and after many years, when they learned of our plan to one day force the Raku from this section of space, they gave us new a technology."

  "Gave it to you? Not sold it to you? What was it?"

  "Gave it to us. The ability to shift our ships temporally."

  Trista's stomach clenched. Puzzle pieces suddenly fell into place. She heard Vanteen's voice like an echo, ‘all is a walk on the beach'. She felt slightly sick.

  "Are you saying, time travel?” she asked.

  "I suppose you could say that."

  Her temper flared. “Well let's suppose I will say that,” she said angrily.

  "Trista, have you ever thought about how you will explain your absence to the people on your world?” he asked quietly.

  "Yes! All the time! What am I supposed to say to them? ‘Gee, Mom, Dad. Aliens abducted me.’ They'd slap me in an institution so fast it would break a Daytona speed record."

  "Would it help if I told you that when you are returned to your world, it will be as if you never left?"

  "What do you mean?” she asked in alarm. “Are you saying I won't remember you?” Her heart clenched oddly at the thought such a thing were possible. How could she live and not remember this man?

  "No, love. You will remember everything. But we will take you back as close to where we retrieved you as possible. If will seem as though only a few minutes will have passed on your world."

  "So,
I've been dying inside thinking about my family, my mother, is living every day wondering what happened to me. My family will never be the same. I'm gone and they'll never know what happened. Now you sit there and tell me they will never worry? Because they'll never know I was gone?"

  "We can make it so, yes."

  "Just like that!” She snapped her fingers. “Why would you keep this from me? Why would you let me worry and worry and worry over my family?"

  "It has been many months since you've expressed such a worry to me. Am I to be able to know your thoughts?"

  "What? You think I just got over it?” she yelled.

  "I'm truly sorry you are upset."

  Rage at his calm deception claimed her. Rage at his lack of trust. Rage that he'd waited so long to tell her something so important rolled through her.

  "I hate you!” she screamed at him. He recoiled as if she'd slapped him.

  He stood and shrugged into his jacket and picked up his pack. When he walked back to her she turned a tear-streaked face up to him, defying him to speak.

  He leaned over and kissed her unresponsive lips.

  "I love you, Trista,” he said, his voice hoarse and thick. It was the first time he'd ever said it aloud. He turned and pulled the door closed behind him. She listened to the sound of his boots as he went swiftly down the steps.

  She folded her arms on the table and dropped her head onto them and wept.

  Twenty-one

  Trista sleepwalked through the rest of the day. Vanteen and W'eylin came expecting her to go to the market with them. Vanteen chattered a string of instructions at W'eylin and quickly shoved him back out the door. Then she curled up quietly on the end of the couch.

  Trista was glad for her presence and grateful for her friend's silence. She cleaned up the table, and set their laundry out for one of the young boys to pick up. Then she collapsed on the other end of the couch.

  "What damn man do?” Vanteen finally asked. “Want Vanteen hurt man?"

  It made Trista laugh and cry all at the same time. The tears took over and Vanteen hopped over and pulled her head over onto her shoulder.

  "You cry all out. We fix damn man later."

  "He told me he loved me."

  "This is cry for?” Vanteen asked incredulously. “Would think Trista want hear."

  "I do. I did. I was unfair to him. I thought he'd lied to me."

  "You think Q'winn love Trista is lie?” Vanteen made a clucking noise. “Vanteen try but girl is dumb,” she sighed long-sufferingly.

  "You told me once that when you went back to Okar, it would still be a sunny day. You told me my being here was all a walk on the beach. I didn't understand. Q'winn tried to tell me and I thought, I thought ... I don't know what I think.” Trista finished tiredly.

  "What Q'winn tell?” Vanteen asked softly.

  Trista told her. Vanteen nodded solemnly.

  "Not tell you people when get home. Will be hard. All will be different in your eyes. Others not understand this. Not so on Okar. All know."

  "Vanteen, what would happen if you'd never go home?"

  "Be fine. Everyone know Vanteen take trip here. Know chance not go home."

  "But, now, aren't your daughters grown? If you go back, won't that erase everything that they've accomplished while you've been gone?"

  Vanteen smiled sadly. “Could. Time strange. One life important, not so, all at once. Important stuff happen over. You understand?"

  Trista thought she did, but her head was pounding. It was getting dark and all she wanted to do was sleep.

  "I think. Can I stay with you tonight?” Trista asked.

  Vanteen snorted. “Make W'eylin cry. We do anyway."

  * * * *

  A gentle hand on her shoulder woke her. It was still dark.

  "Trista, wake up."

  "W'eylin.” She struggled to sit up as cold premonition struck her. “What's wrong?"

  He sat on the couch and put his arms around her.

  "Trista, something has happened with the Elsu. We can't locate her. We're not receiving any transmissions from her. C'ollin D'arar took the Anakin back out with a mixed crew to search for her."

  Trista stared at him in shock. She could not have heard him correctly.

  "What has happened?” she asked dazedly.

  He shook his head. “We don't know. She just disappeared off the screens and off the communication boards."

  "Did she shift in time?” she asked and felt W'eylin start. “Q'winn talked to me about it before he left.” She was struck by sudden insight.

  "Was that the test he was to make? To test the equipment on that ship for these shifts? To see if it worked?” Reaction was setting in. Vanteen sat down on the other side of her.

  "Tell me, W'eylin. I need to know!” She grabbed at him.

  "Yes. That's part of it. He was to go further than we have before."

  "Why? What's so important that you have to go back for it?” she cried. “What is worth the risk of changing everything?"

  "He didn't go back, Trista. He went forward."

  Trista stared at him in disbelief. “Why?"

  "To locate the Raku. To gain the knowledge of where, and when, they will be at a planet so that we can be there, waiting.” He touched her face. “This may be nothing. We may find out that ships that do this will be out of contact. Q'winn made me promise not to keep anything that happened from you. He made me promise him.” W'eylin's voice shook at the end.

  "I want to go to the communications room."

  "Of course. Get ready and I will take you.” He paused before he went on. “Trista, my father will be there."

  Trista nodded. Q'winn's father would likely ignore her totally. But if he spoke to her, it would be to blame her for his son's decisions.

  Vanteen chattered at him in Okarran. He nodded. “So get dressed, too, then! I'll wait outside."

  Trista dressed as a strange numbness seeped into her. Her heart kept denying all of it. It just couldn't be true. Surely if something had happened to Q'winn she would know it in her bones. Surely.

  Her last words to him echoed in her mind and taunted her. She didn't hate him. She loved him. And she'd never said the words to him.

  Instead she'd flung hurtful words at him. Her knees threatened to give out when she thought that the last words he'd heard her say was that she hated him. That he should die...

  No! No. That simply could not be. She'd not believe that. Ever. He said he'd be back by midday meal and he would be. Time was on his side. He knew, wherever he was, when he had to be back.

  He'd show up and she'd tell him how sorry she was. She'd tell him that she loved him, too. Another ten hours and he'd be back and wondering what the fuss was. She pushed everything from her mind but the ticking off of the minutes.

  * * * *

  Eight days later C'ollin D'arar came home with grim news. The Anakin had found wreckage at one of the locations where the Elsu was supposed to have gone. All hands were presumed lost.

  Trista collapsed and turned inward. Nothing Vanteen or W'eylin said reached her. She was lost in her grief and could not be consoled. She refused to move from Q'winn's rooms. She refused to eat. She brewed zhecr each morning, poured two mugs and sat at the table and waited.

  Vanteen would come in each morning and thank her for the tea and drink from the second mug. W'eylin was granted personal leave and spent his days trying to get her to go outside. He suggested riding to the ocean. He suggested the market. He suggested a trip to the breeding meadows to see Roj's first batch of offspring. Trista would not budge from her rooms. They watched her grow thinner and more distant by the day.

  The day of the first snowfall of the season Trista disappeared. They searched frantically for her, finally forming several search parties for outside the Keep proper. W'eylin had a sudden insight and grabbed Vanteen. They found her on the other side of the ridge staring out at the ocean.

  "This is the first place we came alone,” Trista told them. “Do you remember, W'ey
lin? You came and told him he had to go to Damali. We were here."

  "I remember."

  "I want to go home."

  W'eylin and Vanteen looked at each other. They'd been expecting this.

  "I'll arrange for it, if you're sure,” W'eylin said to her.

  "I'm sure.” She accepted W'eylin's hand and he pulled her to her feet. “When I first saw Mahdis Keep, I thought it was so beautiful. There's no beauty left here for me. Not even this place.” She started to walk to the top of the ridge. W'eylin offered her his bogga, but she refused.

  She walked back to Mahdis Keep not seeming to notice the cold or the falling snow. Vanteen saw her to Q'winn's rooms and got her into a hot tub, then into dry clothes. W'eylin arrived shortly thereafter.

  "It's arranged. We have to wait for the Anakin to return as she has your data. She should be back in four days. We'll leave for Terra in one week."

  Trista nodded her acknowledgement. She had nothing more to say on this world except her goodbyes.

  * * * *

  Trista stood in the small chamber on the Anakin with Vanteen and W'eylin. W'eylin did not want her to leave.

  "You know you can stay with me, Trista. Vanteen will be going home soon, too."

  "I know what you're saying, W'eylin, but I can't. You're a good man, but you're not the right man."

  "I know. I wanted you to know you had the offer. It's a sincere one. We both loved him, love him still. There'd be some comfort in that."

  He sounded sad and Trista wavered. There would be great comfort in being with someone who'd known Q'winn. Of staying and being able to share their memories.

  "I have to move on. I'm sorry, W'eylin.” Trista nodded towards Vanteen. “She'd stay if you'd just ask her."

  He looked surprised at that. Trista took his hand. “Ask, stubborn man,” she said in Okarran.

  He pulled Trista into his arms and they held each other for a few moments. He kissed her cheek.

  "Goodbye, Trista.” He turned and was gone.

  All that remained for Trista was to say her goodbyes to Vanteen and step into the beam of light behind her.

  "You do good, pretty girl,” Vanteen said as she smoothed Trista's hair. “Be hard at first. Everyone look see different Trista."