They’d been skating the wire as it was. Adam had found what they needed on the last night. They’d been down to the last goddamn hour before they were due to deliver. And the motherfucker had been stolen right out from under them. That same dark figure had appeared out of nowhere, had cracked the lock and hot-wired the thing before Joe or Adam could reach it.
They’d failed. They hadn’t met the terms of their agreement, which meant Al had added on interest. A year’s worth of it. Four more cars every month for another fucking year. He’d gotten what he wanted.
And Shay had walked in right in the middle of the whole mess.
He’d lost her.
No, he’d fucking destroyed her.
He speared his fingers through his hair, fisting it. He’d had no choice. Al and that asshole Don had seen her. Hugh had seen the interest in the men’s eyes. His only thought had been to get her the hell out of there as quickly as possible. Out of harm’s way.
What was she doing there in the first place? Why the hell had she come to the garage, looking like that—and not just what she’d been wearing—but the look on her face. Open and sweet. Hopeful.
That look was for him.
Shay was his, and Jesus, he’d nearly lost his mind when Al had turned his weaselly fucking eyes on his woman.
“Fuck.” He fired the bottle in his hand across the room. It shattered when it met the wooden doorframe, exploding all over the floor.
“Can you yell duck next time you start throwing bottles?” Joe stood by the door, expression wary.
“You wouldn’t have to duck if you knocked instead of walking right the fuck on in.” His words came out a goddamn snarl, the anger throbbing through him, making his voice rough as hell.
His brother stared at him. “Can’t ever see that happening.”
“I’m not in the mood for your shit right now.” Shoving his fingers through his hair again, he stood and paced to the other side of the room. “And glad to see you’re still alive. Since you blew off the meet with Al last night, I could only assume you had something more important to do.”
Joe shrugged. “You know me, always in hot demand.”
Hugh scowled. “Seriously? While we were losing everything…you were what? Drinking? Fucking?”
Joe opened his mouth to answer, but Hugh wasn’t in the mood to hear it.
“Do me a favor and take your fucking court jester routine somewhere else.”
The attitude vanished, Joe’s gaze going hard. “Promise, no juggling.”
Jesus Christ. He was being a dick, but shit, he was angry. So goddamn angry. “Joe…”
“Forget it.” His brother shook his head, crossed his arms. “I can’t believe we’re stuck for another goddamn year, but we can…”
“I don’t give a shit about Al or his fucking cars,” Hugh fired back. That wasn’t the reason he was lashing out, acting like an asshole.
Joe pushed his hands into his pockets, head tilting to the side, studying Hugh. “This is about Shay?”
“What the fuck do you think?”
Joe’s brows lifted. “She’s that important to you?” There was no sarcasm or humor in his voice for once.
No point hiding it anymore, it was over between him and Shay. “Yes.”
“Okay. So you’ll talk to her, apologize. Maybe she’ll…”
“No offense, little brother, but I’m not taking relationship advice from someone who’s never taken it beyond one night with a woman.”
Joe’s brows lowered. “You make a good point, I guess.”
Hugh planted his hands on his hips, stared at the floor, trying to calm the hell down, then looked back at Joe. “Anyway, it’s too late. You don’t know what she’s come from, what she’s been through, why she doesn’t trust easy. I was winning that trust, thought I only had to keep her a secret for four more weeks. Just four. Now we’re stuck for another year. I won’t expose her to that. I won’t risk her being used as a pawn.”
Joe rubbed the back of his neck. “Shit, I’m sorry, bro.” His expression turned dark, hard. “Al set us up. I’m positive of it.” He stared out the window. “Now that fucker has us exactly where he wants us.”
“Yeah.” Hugh shook his head. “And we can’t prove shit.”
Joe turned back to Hugh. “If Shay’s yours, if she feels the same…”
“I’ve lost her.”
He’d told himself it was for the best. She was better off without him. Still, he hadn’t been able to stop himself from going to her after the meeting, goddamn begging her to hear him out. He’d been prepared to tell her everything. In that moment, he hadn’t cared. He’d just wanted her not to hurt. Didn’t want to be the cause of that hurt.
And yeah, he’d wanted her back.
But he couldn’t have her. Not now. Now, they were tied in for another goddamn year.
Joe hung around for a while longer, but Hugh wasn’t in the talking mood, and his brother finally left.
Hugh stared out the window for a long time after, didn’t know what to do with himself. If his father was there right then, Hugh would wrap his hands around the motherfucker’s neck and kill the bastard. Hugh had messed up—had given the old bastard the benefit of the doubt one time too many—and now he’d taken Joe and Adam down with him. He wasn’t doing that to Shay, as well.
She was lost to him…forever. He’d made sure of that.
He turned away, took in his living room, remembered all the stupid shit he’d been imagining ever since Shay had walked in there. Since she’d spent that night with him in his bed. Of them being together.
A life with her.
With a roar, he kicked the coffee table, flipping it, sending it across the floor. He scrubbed his hands over his face, breath puffing in and out of his lungs as if he was on the verge of hyperventilating. He was going out of his mind, felt close to exploding out of his skin. He didn’t want to be in this house on his own. If he couldn’t have her here with him, he wanted to be with Shay in that tiny pink fucking trailer, lying in her bed, her soft body wrapped around him.
He couldn’t have it. Any of it. Would never hold her in his arms again.
With nowhere to go, nothing to stop this restless feeling, the non-stop throb in his chest, he walked to the kitchen, boots crunching on broken glass, and grabbed another beer.
Right then, getting drunk, making himself numb so he didn’t have to think or feel anymore, sounded like a pretty damn good idea. But he’d need something a hell of a lot stronger than beer for that. He put back the beer and grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels from the cupboard, instead.
He’d screwed up everything, but getting drunk, that was one thing he could do right.
* * *
“Wake the hell up.”
The voice banging away in Hugh’s head wouldn’t shut the fuck up. He didn’t want to wake up. He wanted to stay asleep. Someone shook him, and he kicked out with his foot.
“Piss off.”
“Either wake on your own or I get creative.”
Adam. Hugh recognized his friend’s voice. He also knew what getting creative entailed. And if Adam dumped a bucket of water in his bed, Hugh would have to beat the shit out of the man, and that would take energy he didn’t have. Dragging his eyes open, he forced himself to sit up, swinging his legs around so they hit the floor. He rubbed his hands over his face, head pounding.
“What the fuck do you want?”
“Bender’s over. Three goddamn days is long enough. In case you’ve forgotten, we have a garage to run.”
Hugh didn’t give a shit about the garage. Didn’t give a shit about anything. “I’m sure you and Joe have it covered.”
“Your brother’s been MIA for the last two days. I can’t do this on my own. Get in the goddamn shower, and get your ass to work.”
That got his attention. “Joe hasn’t been at his place?”
Adam shook his head. “He sent a couple texts, so I know he’s not in a ditch somewhere. Probably holed up with his latest piece.”
Even as Adam said it, Hugh could see the concern in his friend’s eyes. Joe had his fun but never at the expense of the business or their deal with Al. Never. “Give me fifteen.”
“Make it ten.”
* * *
Hours later, well after closing, Hugh was head bent, trying to focus on what he was doing under the hood of a Cadillac, when Joe strode in. Thank fuck.
The prick looked perfectly fine.
Straightening, Hugh wiped off his hands, relief riding him hard. “Where’ve you been?”
“Sorting out a few things.”
“Yeah? What things are those?”
Joe stopped several yards away and feet braced, arms crossed, he locked eyes with Hugh. The look on his brother’s face was one he’d never seen before. There was no grin, no smirk. No wicked glint in his eyes right before he nailed Hugh with some smartass, sarcastic comment. He was stone cold. Serious as a heart attack. Not something Joe was very often.
Hugh’s gut tightened, spine like a damn steel pipe. He threw the rag in his hand on the workbench. “What is it?”
Adam strode out of the office right at that moment, gaze darting between Hugh and Joe, and pulled up short. “Shit. What in the hell’s going on?”
Joe ignored Adam, kept his eyes on Hugh and something flickered through them he had no hope of deciphering, but that look, it made his gut clench into a tight knot. Fuck.
“Mom? Lucy?” he rasped
Joe shook his head. “Jesus. No. It’s nothing like that.”
Hugh crossed his arms to hide the way his goddamn hands shook. This was big, whatever Joe had to say. “Spit it out.”
Joe uncrossed his arms, hands dropping to his sides. “What’s going on is that we’re free of Al. Dad’s debt, you don’t have to worry about it anymore.”
What the fuck? Hugh felt his fucking knees go weak. “What?”
“It’s over,” Joe choked out.
“How the hell did you pull that off?” Adam rasped.
Joe’s gaze darted away, then slid back. “When we lost the Nissan, the night of our meeting with Al…I followed her.”
Hugh’s brows shot up. “Her?”
“The woman working for Al, the one stealing shit out from under us.”
Adam cursed.
Shit. “That’s why you weren’t there, at the meeting?” Hugh said gruffly.
Joe’s lips lifted on one side, not quite a smile. “Not the big screw up you thought, huh?”
“Joe…”
His brother shook his head. “Doesn’t matter now, you had no way of knowing what I was doing.” He shrugged. “The only thing that matters now is we’re free. She led me straight to her place. Been watching her the last few days, waiting for something, anything to prove Al was behind it. She had the Nissan stashed not far from her place. I watched her get in it, followed her to Al’s warehouse for the drop off. She’s his niece, on his payroll, boosts cars for him, as well.” He shrugged. “Next day, same thing, only this time there were cops. They were on to her, closing in. Probably watching her on and off for weeks, waiting to get the evidence they needed. I saved her ass before she could give it to them, then I kindly offered her a ride to her uncle’s warehouse, so I could fill him in on her close call.” Joe shrugged again. “Al decided to show some gratitude.”
“That’s not like Al,” Hugh said into the stunned silence.
Joe held his stare. “What can I say; he loves his niece.”
Hugh shoved his hands in his hair. “So what…we owe him nothing? We’re free and clear?” Every muscle in his body was rock solid, as if he was waiting for the punchline, the hit that knocked flat the hope building behind his chest.
Joe nodded, rubbed the back of his neck, looking uncomfortable as fuck. “It’s over, bro. You don’t need to stick out your neck for us anymore. Mom, Lucy, me. We’re good.”
Fuck.
Hugh planted his hands on his hips. “That’s not how it was. I never thought that…”
Joe shook his head, shutting him up. “It’s done. Over. Go get your girl. Tell her whatever the hell you’ve got to tell her to make her forgive you.”
Hugh was still struggling to process what had just happened. They were finally off the hook. He could be with Shay, he could go to her, he could… He sucked in a rough breath. “I hurt her.”
“Make her understand.”
Shay had been through hell with her bitch of a mother, had been walked all over by that fucker she’d been seeing. Hugh would rather walk over broken glass than hurt her again.
What had him repeatedly lifting the Jack bottle to his lips had been the image of Shay, of her face a second before she walked out of the garage. The pain etched into her lovely features.
I’ll only hurt her again.
Hugh rubbed a hand over his dry lips, shook his head. “I’ll mess it up, let her down. Shit, like I let you all down…”
“What the hell are you talking about?” Joe growled.
Hugh lifted his gaze to his brother. “I should have known. I should have known how deep the old man had gotten. I should have stopped him years before it got so bad. It’s my fault we were in this situation to begin with.”
Joe stared at him, hard. “You can’t really believe that shit…”
The side door crashed open, and their heads swung toward it.
His heart squeezed as if it was in a goddamned vise.
Lucy stood in the open door, lower lip trembling, cheeks glistening, eyes blazing. Then she pointed at him. “Don’t be a dick.”
Hugh froze. “Nice to see you too, little sister.” He swallowed hard. “What the hell are you doing here?”
She didn’t answer, because she was flat-out running toward him, her small frame hitting him two seconds later. He lifted her off her feet, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Shit, Luce.”
She lifted her head, slapped his shoulder. “I heard what you just said, numb-nuts, and…” Her breath hitched. “I’m pissed way the hell off.”
Lucy had always had the ability to melt him into a goddamn puddle at her feet, ever since she was a baby. He’d taken one look at her and known he’d protect her with his life. She’d kept him busy. “Yeah?”
She placed both hands on his cheeks. “I know you’ve been trying to protect me, but I’m not a goddamn kid anymore.” She gave him a squeeze. “I know, Hugh…I know everything.”
His eyes drifted shut. Jesus, he wanted to throw up. “Luce…”
“No. It’s my turn to talk.” Her hand cupped his cheek. “If it wasn’t for you, we would’ve lost our house. If it wasn’t for you, some days we wouldn’t have had any damn food to eat. You paid for my school books, made sure I went every day.” She swiped away a tear. “You paid for my prom dress…you…”
He gave her a squeeze to stop her, couldn’t hear another word. She was killing him. “Scared the shit out of your date, too.”
She chuckled. “Yeah, you scared him so bad, he wouldn’t even hold my freakin’ hand.”
“Good to know.”
She snorted then buried her face against his shoulder, tightening her arms around his neck. “I’m sorry for being a pain in the ass.”
“I know, shrimp.”
“Love you,” she whispered. “Nothing could change that, ever.”
“Love you, too.”
He put her back onto her feet, and she stared up at him.
“You’re a good man, even if you are my annoying big brother who can’t stay the hell out of my business.” She socked him in the biceps, a small smile playing on her lips. “What Dad did is on him. You were the one who manned up when you shouldn’t have had to, when you were just a kid. You made sure we got by. You did that, Hugh.” She shook her head. “I don’t give a crap how you did it. The only thing that matters is that you did.”
His little sister still had the ability to destroy him, to make him fucking melt. “Lucy…”
“Do you believe me?”
“Shrimp…”
“Do you?”
Deep down, he’d known what happened with their father was out of his control. That he’d just been a kid trying to be a man. And because of that, he’d made some fucked-up decisions to provide for his family. Still, he couldn’t just let go of the guilt. Couldn’t be absolved of it just like that. He’d been carrying it around too long.
He couldn’t change the past, but maybe, eventually, he could make peace with it. Because the decisions he’d made, he’d make again in a heartbeat. He hadn’t been capable of making the kind of money they needed. As for their old man…
“There’s no way you could have known what Dad was doing,” Joe said, as if he could read Hugh’s thoughts. “He was a goddamn snake. You’d have to be a mind reader to know the shit he was involved in. Give yourself a break, man. You were a kid. He was our father. Despite everything, we loved him. Those times he came back, we all wanted to believe he’d changed, that it was for good. All of us.”
Joe was right. About all of it. Hugh had been too caught up in the mess with Al to see through the fog. He’d only been able to focus on his failure when it looked as if his brother and sister had a different view of the situation completely.
Lucy reached up and gave his beard a tug. “You gonna go get your girl or what?”
Adam, who had been standing quietly on the sidelines, leaning against a car, pushed off and crossed his arms over his faded T-shit. “You sure Shay’s in this as deep as you are?”
“No,” he admitted.
Lucy cursed under her breath and turned to Adam. “For once, would you keep your trap shut? No one wants to hear the negative crap you love to spew. Some of us have feelings. Some of us want a connection. Unlike you, Hugh isn’t a manwhore, looking to shove his dick in every woman in the goddamn country.”
Adam’s brows lifted, blue eyes boring into Hugh’s sister. “Manwhore?”
“You’re a slut,” she fired back.
“Why don’t you tell me how you really feel, baby girl?”
Lucy’s face went red, body stiffening, eyes narrowing. Her lips parted, about to let him have it, but Joe clapped a hand over her mouth.
“Calm down, shrimp. You’re like an emotional whirlwind. My goddamn head hurts. Ow!” He pulled his hand away, shaking it. “She bit me!”
Swerve: Boosted Hearts (Volume 1) Page 20