VOLITION (Perception Trilogy, book 2)

by Strauss, Lee

  I stomped out my cigarette and chased after him.

  Chapter 22

  The bedroom door to Mary’s room was closed and I assumed she was behind it. Noah wasn’t in the living area. I ran out the front door.

  His back was turned to me and I called out, “Noah!”

  He spun and gave me a “what the hell” look. Right. I used his real name. I couldn’t stop screwing up.

  “I can’t leave you alone for a minute,” he spat. “Is no guy off limits for you?”

  “It wasn’t like that.”

  “It sure looked like it to me.”

  “Well, what do you care anyway? You have Mary now.”

  “I don’t have Mary.”

  “She thinks you do.”

  He rubbed the back of his neck and sighed.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m just so bored. Aimless. I’ve been holed up here for almost a month. I told you I was going crazy.”

  Noah puffed and stuffed his hands into his pockets. He kicked at the snow. “Okay, you’re right. It’s not fair to hold you here like a prisoner. Let’s go for a walk.”

  “Now?”An unfamiliar sense of excitement sizzled through my being. Not only had I not been out in the real world since we’d arrived, I also hadn’t been alone with Noah.

  “No time like the present.” He tugged down on my hat, covering my ears, and tightened my scarf. “Just make sure your face is covered.”

  It felt more than great to be away from the factory and especially to have Noah all to myself. I wanted to explain things to him. I hated that he misunderstood what had happened back there with Jabez.

  The fact was I was in love with Noah Brody. I realized it the night of my attack, when Noah had chased after me and saved me. I know he’d saved me before, but I remembered this time. I remembered how my heart had swelled as he’d gently helped me and held me up. How he’d pressed himself against me and comforted me in the night.

  I’d missed my chance to tell him when it mattered, and it killed me that he didn’t believe it anymore.

  The streets of St. Louis were crowded with pedestrians and noiseless vehicles. Billboards flashed bright with ostentatious ads. The latest fad in fashion, the newest models of pod cars—which made my heart skip a beat with longing for my own—and the most essential gadget for the modern home, humanoid domestic help.

  The humanoids sprung out of some of the boards in 3D.

  “They look creepily realistic,” I said.

  Noah lifted his chin. “Look around.”

  I hadn’t noticed them before, but they were everywhere. Walking across the street with messenger bags, serving coffee and fast food at hotdog stands. “No wonder there aren’t any jobs,” I said.

  “It’s scary how fast they’re taking over.”

  Noah grabbed my hand to cross the street. I squeezed it tight, and when he went to pull away, I wouldn’t let go. He gave me a questioning look.

  “Noah.” We stopped on the corner and even though I knew this wasn’t the most romantic spot around, I didn’t care. I was a volcano of emotion.

  “Are you all right?” he asked, dipping to look into my eyes. I felt them well up.

  “I’m not. I haven’t been all right since…you know.”

  Noah’s eyes flashed with a look I recognized. Regret.

  “No,” I said. “Please don’t be sorry. You did the right thing by taking me from Sol City. And I know I’ve screwed up since then. Badly.” I had to tell him how I felt before I lost my nerve. “I fell in love with you once and then I forgot. I totally get it now how I could’ve loved you before. Because I’ve done it again.”

  I inhaled. “I love you.”

  There, I said it. The words he’d been waiting for me to say. I’d hoped for a smile. For his eyes to light up.

  Instead he dropped my hand and looked away.

  “Noah?”

  “I’m sorry.” He removed his gloves and rubbed his face with bare, ruddy hands. Then he steadied his gaze on me. The pain in his eyes cause dread to leak into my pores. “The Zoe I fell in love with doesn’t exist anymore.” His voice cracked. “I don’t know who this Zoe is.”

  “It’s still me. I’m still here.”

  “I know. And I’m committed to seeing you through this, however long it takes.”

  My stomach flipped and all my hurt swirled into anger. “I don’t want your pity!”

  “It’s not pity. It’s loyalty.”

  Loyalty? My face stung as if he’d slapped me. “That’s the same thing.”

  He sighed long and hard. “It’s better this way, in the long run. You know it is.”

  “Because I’m a GAP? We’re back to that?”

  “It’s an issue. It always has been, even though we didn’t want to face it.”

  “It was never an issue for me.” I stormed away, but he ran after me and grabbed my arm.

  “Let go of me!” My eyes pooled with tears and I swiped angrily at them with my gloved hand.

  “Zoe,” Noah said. “I know this is hard. It’s hard for both of us. It’s important that we stick together now. More than ever.”

  I wrapped my arms around my chest, trying to hold in all the pain. If I let it out now, I’d be a weeping mess.

  I dared to look up into Noah’s eyes, but he was staring at something over my shoulder. I turned and saw what had captured his attention. All the billboards were flickering, and then for one second a scroll of Chinese writing flashed across every single one of them before the original images returned.

  “What was that?” I said.

  “I don’t know, but we’d better get back.”

  So that was how it was. Noah didn’t love me anymore, and it was back to business as usual.

  Chapter 23

  “Did you see it?” Mary said the second we walked in. The TV was on and my grandfather’s face filled the screen. “It’s all over the news. The Chinese government is threatening to attack.”

  “What?” I said.

  Jabez added, “Vanderveen just issued a warning. He’s pushing a bill through to fast track cyborg technology in order to raise an American army to stand against them.”

  My knees melted and I barely made it to a chair. Grandpa V had done it. His fear tactic policies were working.

  “He did this with one gimmick?” Noah asked.

  Mary nodded. “He said this is proof the Chinese are spying on America and that he has intelligence that confirms the Chinese already have their cyborg troops hidden in cells underground and out of satellite range.”

  Noah pinched his eyes together and rubbed his forehead with his hand, a move I’d seen him do a lot lately.

  “Do you think it’s true?” I asked. “Does China really have cyborg troops?”

  “I doubt it,” Noah said. “But it doesn’t matter if they do or don’t. Your gr—”

  He almost said my grandfather.

  “The president,” I said, “is getting what he wanted all along.”

  Noah’s eyes drilled into mine. “Yes, he is.”

  The night of Noah’s first fight arrived. I sat with the crowd in the collapsible chairs, trembling nervously like I was the one about to get into the ring instead of just watching. Around me people murmured, loosening scarves and removing hats, unzipping the first layer of winter clothing. Sizzling apprehension and body heat had warmed up the room. I tugged on the collar of my sweater.

  Jabez dimmed the lights, and the murmur turned into an excited chatter. When the spotlight lit the empty ring, the audience responded with a roar of applause.

  Mary sat beside me in the front row. Both of us were staring hard in the same direction. Noah waited in a darkened corner by the door wearing only shorts and his sensors. He jiggled with nerves, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

  A monitor overhead flashed numbers: how many spectators watched from the security of their own homes—over fifty thousand. Thirty-seven percent had casted a bet.

  Fifty thousand! My stomach swirled and a headache
drummed in my temples.

  Mary sprinted over to Noah and I held myself back from following. I didn’t want to be a distraction, and she was no stranger to these kinds of fights. Her mouth moved quickly—a pep talk—ending with a smile.

  My eyes narrowed when she grabbed and squeezed his hand.

  Before I knew it I was on my feet, despite my recent opinion that I’d just be a distraction, and walked to his side. I had to say something. She couldn’t be the only one he saw as his support. She left when she saw me approach.

  “You okay?” I asked Noah when I got close.

  His dark eyes softened for a moment. “I’ll be fine.”

  “I know,” I said, not at all sure that he would be. “You’re going to do great. Jabez has trained you well.”

  He grinned a little. “Thanks.”

  The warning bell chimed, the crowd hooted. They were ready for a fight.

  “I have to go,” Noah said.

  “Okay.” I stroked his arm. He’d already broken out in a sweat. When my fingers reached his hand, I took it and squeezed. There was a moment between us before it was broken by Jabez’s voice.

  “In the ring, Jude!”

  I took my seat beside Mary. I could tell by her uncustomary tautness that she was nervous for Noah, too.

  “I can see that you love him,” she said.

  I jerked back. “What?”

  “You love your cousin.”

  I wasn’t sure what Mary was saying. Had she guessed we weren’t cousins?

  “Yeah, sure,” I said then turned my attention back to Noah.

  A spot-light settled on him, and the crowd chanted, “Jude, Jude, Jude.”

  Like magic, his opponent materialized. Jabez was right. He was far more solid looking than “Mickey.”

  The commentator appeared as a caricature on the monitor. Everyone was taking security precautions and all were using first names only.

  “From Western USA, at a hundred and seventy-seven pounds, we have Douglas!”

  Douglas’s virtual self jumped up and down and thrust his hands in the air. The commentator tossed out more stats: his wins and losses—more wins than losses—and the chances of his beating Noah. Five to one.

  My nerves tingled with fear. How could Noah beat this guy? I knew this was a crazy idea. Noah was minutes away from getting killed.

  “From Eastern USA,” the commenter shouted, “at a hundred and sixty-nine pounds, we have Jude!”

  Noah wasn’t as good at showcasing himself. He kept his head down but raised his right arm. Even though our crowd cheered, I doubted that any of them had cast a bet in Noah’s favor.

  Noah assumed his fighting stance, left leg back, elbows tucked in, fists in front of his face. I was more than a little concerned by the fact that he hadn’t any protective gear. Douglas’s solidified image looked very real and very menacing.

  Douglas jabbed Noah in the chin, and my heart stopped. I wasn’t sure I could watch this.

  Noah recovered and struck back. Douglas didn’t even appear fazed. He danced around like he was fighting a kid. Which he was. He caught Noah a couple of times in the gut, but I could tell he was just playing with him.

  The crowd gasped and said “ah” with each punch. The place crackled with energy as they chanted, “fight, fight, fight,” obviously wanting more action. The crowd noise from Douglas’s side of the world was broadcasted through the speakers as well and, combined with the beating of my heart pulsing in my ears, deafening.

  After ten minutes, Douglas put on the heat. He threw punch after punch, and though Noah managed to block most of them, I knew his face was taking a beating. Thin streams of red dripped down his face. I swallowed the huge lump that had formed in my throat.

  Noah got a second wind and came back with a round of punches to Douglas’s gut. Left jab, right, left.

  Our crowd roared.

  The lights flickered and Douglas disappeared. Must’ve been a power surge somewhere. A guy in the crowd swore and threw his chair.

  Then Douglas reappeared and Noah was caught off guard. With a blur Douglas’s leg swung through the air, catching Noah on the neck.

  He didn’t know what hit him. He fell to the mat, out cold.

  “Noah!”

  Mary was already on her feet and running to him, so she didn’t hear my slip.

  The virtual referee started counting.

  Jabez waited at the matt with a first-aid kit. “Come on, Jude.” Did he hope Noah would recover and re-enter the fight?

  “—eight, nine, ten!” The referee pointed to Douglas, declaring him the winner. He strutted around the ring with his arms in the air like the proud peacock he was.

  Jabez jumped into the ring and waved smelling salts under Noah’s nose.

  My hand covered my mouth and I blinked back tears. Noah’s face! Blood ran from his nose and lips. He had cuts above his eyes and his cheeks were swelling.

  A flood of relief weakened me when I saw Noah stir. He was alive.

  Dissenters in the crowd swore. The fight was too short. This guy Jude had better last longer next time.

  There wouldn’t be a next time. Not if I had anything to say about it.

  The people slowly moved out of the building, through a side door that led to a darkened alley. Despite the shortness of the fight, most of them were happy because they’d bet in favor of Douglas.

  I climbed into the ring and kneeled down beside Noah. “Can you hear me?”

  His eyes fluttered open. I wanted to cradle him in my arms, kiss his forehead, stroke his face, but I held back.

  His lips cracked open and I heard a husky, “I’m great. Never better.”

  “I don’t want you to do this again,” I said, suddenly angry. “This is crazy.”

  He just hmm’d and closed his eyes.

  Jabez and Mary worked to bandage up his cuts and stop the bleeding.

  “I’ll take him to the showers,” Jabez said. He helped Noah out of the ring, and propped him under his arm. Then Jabez caught my eye. “Don’t worry, Chloe. It looks worse than it is. He’ll be fine.”

  Chapter 24

  Noah spent the next four days on the couch. I fed him, tended his wounds, kept him company. He groaned and hobbled like an old man every time he had to go to the bathroom or have a shower.

  I brought him his daily lunch of canned tomato soup. I lifted a spoonful and aimed for his mouth.

  Noah shook his head. “I think I can feed myself now.”

  I glanced down at his hands. They were wrapped up, but his fingers were thick and blue. At least the swelling around his mouth had subsided. Noah pushed his weight to sit up straighter and winced as he lifted his head.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Head hurts a bit.”

  I was certain it hurt more than a bit. I handed him the bowl and spoon.

  “Careful, it’s hot.”

  His hands trembled and I worried he’d drop the hot soup on his lap.

  “Are you sure you’re okay.

  “I’m fine.”

  He managed to get the spoon to his lips without spilling it. I willed his success with my eyes. I couldn’t take my gaze off his every move.

  “You’re making me nervous,” he said.

  “You’re making me nervous. Look at you. You’re a mess.” I steadied my gaze on his battered and bruised face and I choked up. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing him. “You’re not doing that ever again.”

  “It wasn’t so bad.”

  “What are you talking about? Look at you! You’re barely recognizable.”

  “One could say that’s a good thing.”

  I shot him a withering glare.

  “Easy. I’m going to be okay. Everything will heal.”

  I folded my arms in defiance. “He knocked you out. He could’ve killed you.”

  “He didn’t kill me. And I made five hundred bucks.”

  My eyebrows shot up in question. “But you lost.”

  “You get paid to participate. You m
ake a lot more if you win. You score big if you keep winning.”

  “Noah,” I said. “It’s not worth it.”

  “Five hundred dollars will pay for what we owe on food and rent. It’s not enough to get us set up somewhere else.”

  “There’s got to be another way. Maybe I could get a job.”

  Noah laughed, then winced. “Your face is still on billboards all over the US. Your grandfather hasn’t stopped the hunt. My face is, too, which is why I can’t go job-hunting, either. This is our only opportunity. Just one win, and I promise we’ll leave.”

  I left it alone while Noah finished his soup. I didn’t want him to blame me for letting it get cold.

  Mary and Jabez kept busy doing who knew what during the day, but we couldn’t escape their company in the evening. It especially unnerved me how her eyes continually darted to Noah and how many times he’d catch her looking and smile.

  Jabez was fixated with something on the TV and told it to increase the volume to six. I helped Noah readjust so he could see the breaking news.

  The female news reporter began, “Riots broke out in cities all across America today in protest against President Vanderveen’s new cyborg technology policies…”

  Images of crowds waving placards pressing up against police lines protecting government buildings, flashed into the room. New York, Los Angeles, Dallas, Chicago, Seattle. Protestors turned violent as they clashed against the law and others with opposing views.

  I felt my jaw slack. I’d never witness such barbaric displays from citizens of my own country and never anything remotely close to a riot in Sol City, yet it satisfied me to see people taking a stand. At least they were doing something, more than I could do trapped in this factory.

  The reporter continued, “Supporters of the new law say such measures are imperative in order to remain on equal footing in a growing super soldier arms race. Dissidents proclaim this to be the end of the era of Global Peace.”

  My heart jumped when Grandpa V’s face appeared.

  “Embracing advancing cyborg technology is a must to ensure homeland security. Unfortunately, we have entered a cold war era with China. The only way to ensure protection for our nation is to remain equal in strength and ability.”