I knew he was teasing, but I didn’t say anything because all my attention was on Missy. “That’s it, Mama. You’re doing great. One more push.”
With the next contraction, the entire body of the foal fell out of his mother. I let go of the breath I’d been holding as tears flowed freely down my face.
“You’re crying.” Keith wiped my wet cheeks with his fingertips. “Everything’s okay. Right, Dr. L.?”
“Yep. It looks like a healthy baby boy!” Dr. Lindsay made her way toward the colt and his mother.
I gave an embarrassed laugh. “I know everything is okay, but it’s the most amazing thing in the world. I’m so glad we saw it.”
Keith squeezed my shoulders. “I’m glad we saw it together.”
*
While I dressed for work the next day, Bianca called to tell me our mother was driving her crazy with last-minute wedding plans. “You would think she was planning a royal event.”
“She’s just excited,” I said, too pumped over the birth of Missy’s colt to think about anything else. “I wish you could’ve seen that little baby horse come into the world. It was absolutely incredible.”
“What about the kiss with Keith?”
“How’d you hear about that?”
Bianca howled with laughter. “I didn’t. I just guessed because of the way you talked about him. It reminded me of when Matt and Drew were born.”
“Bianca! That’s not fair.”
“All’s fair in love and war . . . so, things are going well?”
I sighed. “Things are fine.”
Bianca chuckled. “Honey, judging by that sigh, I’m thinking things are much better than fine.”
“They are, but . . .”
“What? It’s over with Bryan. You never stopped loving Keith. Why are you hesitating?”
Propping my phone between my ear and shoulder, I slipped on my shoes and tied the laces. “I’ve been down this road before. Just because we’re attracted to each other doesn’t mean there’s any kind of future for us. Can you think of a couple who actually got back together after a divorce?”
Bianca was silent for a moment, then she gave a yelp of delight. “Nick and Elizabeth Parker.”
“Who are they? The only Nick I know is Anna’s Nick.”
“Nick and Elizabeth,” Bianca repeated, as if I’d forgotten the names of my very best friends. When I didn’t respond, she said, “Nick and Elizabeth—from the movie Parent Trap? After all that time of living apart and trying to forget each other, they couldn’t do it. Their love was stronger than time, distance, and differences.”
I groaned. “Parent Trap is a movie, Bianca.”
“Yeah, but it’s one of your favorites.”
“True, but there’s no Parent Trap 2. What happens the next week when the problems that tore Nick and Elizabeth apart in the first place reemerge? And what’s going to happen when Keith’s memory returns and he no longer wants to be with me?”
“Do you really think that’s going to happen? He adores you, Jillian. Besides, it doesn’t look like his memory is going to ever return.”
“I know.”
“Do they need to do another brain scan or send him to a specialist?”
“Maybe, but the team is convinced his amnesia is psychogenic.”
“Meaning what? It’s all in his head?”
I took one last sip of my coffee and headed to the sink to brush my teeth. “Sort of. Dr. Jacobs says Keith’s brain is protecting him from remembering something that was very painful. Kind of like when victims of violent crimes can’t remember what the perpetrator looked like or what happened. He thought Keith would regain some of his memories while at treatment, but that didn’t happen.”
“I know you’ve attributed a lot of his behavior to PTSD, but do you . . .” Bianca hesitated. “Do you think it’s also the guilt he has about Marcus? The guilt that he promised everyone he’d watch over Marcus and bring him home safely?”
“I don’t know. I’ve wondered that myself, but I just don’t know.”
Chapter 31
Lyla
On Sunday morning, Lyla and Avery walked to church with Justine and her family. Lyla was a nervous wreck. She’d been twelve the last time she attended church. What if she did or said something wrong?
She considered canceling, but Avery was beyond excited. Plus, Lyla wanted to be the kind of person who worshiped with others on Sunday mornings.
The weather was perfect as they headed down Coronado Boulevard to Church Street. A warm spring breeze blowing off the harbor held the scent of honeysuckle. When the church came into view, Lyla gazed up at the bronze cross on the top of the steeple.
According to legend, the Rose family, who’d settled the island in the early 1800s, had brought the cross from Mexico. During the storm in 1900, the church building had been completely destroyed. Everyone assumed the cross had been swept out to sea, never to be seen again. Nine days later, a little girl found it along the beach, insisting God had showed her the way.
Given what God was doing in her life, Lyla had no doubt the Lord had led that little girl to the cross.
On the steps in front of the church, Justine introduced Lyla and Avery to a handful of friendly people. Then, they entered the building, and Lyla was struck by the beauty of the sanctuary—refurbished hardwood floors, detailed stained-glass windows, and a bright blue ceiling painted with little gold stars.
Even more powerful than the church’s physical beauty was an indescribable spiritual presence. Why had she avoided coming to church for so long?
The music began, and the congregation stood for the opening hymn. When Lyla realized the pianist was Hank, and he was playing “It Is Well With My Soul,” she could hardly contain herself.
He grinned at her and she went all giddy inside.
Justine leaned over and whispered, “We’ve never sung this song before, and I don’t think anyone knows it.”
Lyla just smiled because Avery definitely knew it, and she sang at the top of her lungs while everyone else did their best to follow along. When the song ended, Lyla sat, trying to keep her focus on the service, but her attention kept drifting to Hank who seemed to be struggling just as hard to avoid her gaze.
The sermon expounded on a Bible passage from the book of John where Jesus encountered a Samaritan woman at the well who’d been married five times and was currently living with another man.
“Her story is two-fold,” the pastor explained. “First, it urges us to avoid carnal pleasure. The story also shows us Jesus offering a well of grace and love. It shows us Jesus came to save the sinner, and if we repent, he will forgive us.”
Lyla had to fight back tears as her heart filled with gratitude. I am forgiven. Thank you.
After the service ended, Hank caught up to Lyla. “A group of us are heading to lunch at Alberto’s. Why don’t you come with us?”
Lyla looked at Justine who grinned. “I’m sure he doesn’t mean me. You’re going with the church’s singles group, right, Hank?”
He nodded. “Technically, yes, but we don’t check IDs. You and your husband are more than welcome to come.”
Justine laughed and placed a hand on Lyla’s arm. “I have an idea. How about I take Avery home with me, and you can go with Hank and the others. I think you’d enjoy the group, and Avery could help me with Madison.”
“Yes, please.” Avery tugged at Lyla’s arm.
Lyla wanted to use Avery as an excuse to decline Hank’s invitation because she was intimidated at the thought of going to lunch with a church group.
“We don’t have to stay long,” Hank said, understanding her apprehension.
In the end, Lyla accepted his invitation, and before she knew it, she was sharing a basket of chips and salsa at the festive Mexican food restaurant on Harbor Street. Hank sat beside her, but they both talked to everyone at the table.
Later, Hank walked her home. “Are you glad you came?”
“I am. Thanks for inviting me to lunch,
and thanks for playing my song at church.”
He smiled. “You’re welcome. I’m glad you were able to meet my friends. I could tell they really liked you. I hope you’ll come again.”
Lyla swallowed hard. Had she just found the community she’d been looking for? She hoped so.
*
On Monday afternoon, Lyla took Avery to the hospital for her follow-up visit with the surgeon. After waiting in the windowless exam room for nearly an hour, Dr. Rogers and her medical team finally arrived.
Avery gave the surgeon a big hug. “Look! From Daddy.” She held up the stuffed elephant Ronnie had recently sent.
The doctor properly acknowledged the elephant, before addressing Avery’s medical issues. “I read the report from the speech pathologist, and I’m so pleased by your progress.”
Avery giggled. “I know.”
Dr. Rogers smiled. “You do? Well, can I have a look in your mouth?”
Avery tilted back her head, and Dr. Rogers shined her flashlight around the inside of Avery’s mouth. “Perfect. Absolutely perfect.”
The surgeon looked at Lyla. “She’ll have to continue speech therapy, but unless there’s a problem, I won’t need to see her for six months.”
“Is that long?” Avery asked, scrunching up her brow.
The doctor slipped her flashlight into her lab coat. “It just depends. For someone your age, six months is probably a very long time.”
“I not see Daddy for long time.”
“Oh?”
Avery leaned closer and whispered, “Cause Daddy’s real wife.”
“Is that so?” Confusion filled the doctor’s face.
Lyla wanted to die of humiliation. How many times had she told Avery not to talk or whisper about Ronnie’s real wife? Quickly changing the subject, Lyla thanked Dr. Rogers for everything she’d done.
The doctor smiled. “You’re welcome. You take care now, and I’ll see you in the fall.”
Lyla scheduled the next appointment, then she left the office with Avery. As they rode the elevator down to the lobby, Lyla lifted her daughter’s chin to look her in the eye. “You can’t tell anybody about Daddy’s wife. Even if you whisper.”
Avery pulled her face away. “I didn’t.”
“Yes, you did. We’ve talked about this.”
“We get ice cream?”
Lyla sighed. Was she expecting too much?
The elevator doors opened, and they stepped into the unusually crowded lobby. Avery, who loved the excitement of crowds, shouted, “What happening?”
A young mother with a stroller of triplets smiled. “They’re beginning construction on a new children’s wing, so Governor Williams is here to cut the ribbon.”
“Governor?” Avery’s eyes widened and she scanned the room. “Daddy here?”
Ronnie’s voice carried over the loud speaker, filling the lobby. Without asking Lyla’s permission, Avery bolted toward her father’s voice.
“Avery, wait!” Lyla chased after her daughter, who managed to slip through the crowd and fling herself at Ronnie. Stunned, he stumbled backward several paces.
Unable to move past security, Lyla stood frozen in place.
“Governor Williams,” a reporter said. “Who is this little girl? She called you ‘Daddy.’ Is she your daughter?”
Lyla held her breath, knowing this was the moment of truth. Ronnie locked eyes with her and gave a nervous smile. He looked down at Avery who clung to him with all her might. Then, he nodded. “Yes. Yes, she is. This is my daughter, Avery.”
The crowd gasped, and Lyla’s shock was so profound, she thought she might faint. She didn’t think Ronnie would ever publically acknowledge his daughter. Especially not like this. And especially not during an election year.
Reporters shouted out their questions, but Ronnie ignored them. Bending down, he grinned at Avery and said something Lyla couldn’t hear. Avery responded and Ronnie threw his head back, laughing. Effortlessly, he hoisted his daughter onto his hip and they both waved at the crowd as if they’d been campaigning together for years.
Lyla’s eyes filled. It was finally happening. She was finally arriving to a place where she no longer had to live a lie.
The voice of doubt inside her head said that wasn’t entirely true, but for the moment, she ignored it.
What she couldn’t ignore, however, was the couple behind her. “Good ole Governor Williams,” the man said. “We can always depend on him to enliven the campaign.”
“Yes, it will be interesting to see how he manipulates this event for his own benefit.”
“Don’t you mean how the first lady manipulates it?” someone else asked. “She’s the one with the real power.”
They all laughed.
Lyla shuddered. How would Mary Williams react when she learned about her husband’s illegitimate daughter?
Chapter 32
Jillian
On the morning of Anna and Nick’s wedding, I awoke early and turned on the news while I cooked breakfast for the boys. The top story continued to be Governor Williams’s latest scandal—the love child he’d fathered with Lyla Gray.
“Isn’t she the woman your brother saved? The one who wrote the book?” Drew asked, taking a seat at the bar.
“That’s her.” I set a plate of eggs and pancakes in front of Drew just as a reporter began discussing the fact that little Avery Gray had actually boosted Governor Williams’s polls. I shook my head. Only a politician of Williams’s caliber could cast a positive light on infidelity.
After breakfast, Keith phoned from the boat. “I’m going to have to meet you at the church this afternoon because I have a meeting on post regarding the end of my convalescent leave next week.”
“Are you going to extend it or—”
“No,” he said. “It’s time for me to go back to work.”
“Oh.” I’d been worried he wouldn’t be able to do his job until his memory returned, but maybe that wasn’t the case.
“It’s going to be okay,” he said, reading my mind. “Not remembering might be my new normal. If that’s the case, I’ll just have to deal with it and either relearn my job or learn a new job.”
“I’m sure you’ll do great wherever they put you.”
“Thanks. What time are you supposed to help set up at the ranch this morning?”
I glanced at the microwave clock. “Now.”
“All right. I’m trying to work my way back into your mother’s good graces, so I’ll let you go.”
I said good-bye and hung up, despite wanting to stay on the line. Talking to Keith on the phone transported me back to when we’d first started dating in college. Even though I was no longer that young, naïve girl who waited on his every word, I was crazy about him. Whenever we talked on the phone, I found myself flopping back on my pillow, captured by the sound of his voice.
He called every morning and came by the house in the afternoon to homeschool Matt and have dinner with us. Before going to bed at night, he’d call and we would pray together.
The boys asked about my status with Keith, but I didn’t know how to answer that question because I didn’t want to give them false hope. Yet, for the first time since the divorce, I’d started to believe in a future with Keith.
*
When the boys and I finally arrived at the ranch, my mother put us straight to work. Matt and Drew helped my father outside, and I was assigned kitchen duty where I cut an endless supply of strawberries with Anna’s mother.
“How’s Keith doing?” she asked.
A thrill swept through me as I remembered walking Keith out to his truck last night and kissing him good-night. “He’s doing great,” I said, unable to keep the smile off my face.
“I heard the shooter took a plea bargain, so there won’t be a trial.”
“That’s right.”
“What about his amnesia?”
I placed the next batch of strawberries in a colander and washed them in the sink. “Some of his memories have returned, but t
here’s a lot he doesn’t remember.”
Anna’s mom shook her head. “I can only imagine how frightening and difficult that must be for both of you.”
“It is, but we’re doing okay.”
For the rest of the morning, we continued working. At one point, Anna arrived to help, but my mom sent her away, insisting she needed to relax before the big event. Around five, the boys and I left in order to get dressed.
At home, I showered and slipped into an elegant, blue-sequin dress. I applied my makeup, styled my hair, and checked my appearance in the full-length mirror.
When I came out of my bathroom, I found Matt sitting on my bed. “Well?” He came to his feet and spun around to show off the suit Keith had bought for him at the PX on post. “Do I look like an insurance salesman or what?”
“Oh, Matt.” Seeing him all grown up, looking every bit as striking as his father, took my breath away. He’d recently cut his hair, and although it wasn’t as short as I preferred, his bangs no longer hung in his face.
Tears welled up in my eyes as I walked toward him.
“What, Mom? Do I look lame?”
I hugged him. “You clean up well, Matthew. Your father is going to be so proud when he sees you.”
Matt pulled away and studied my face. “What’s up with you and Dad anyway? Drew keeps talking about the two of you getting married again, but I told him that isn’t going to happen. I don’t want the kid to be disappointed, you know?”
“I know.” I pushed out a slow breath. “Dad and I are doing the best we can to co-parent you. At this point, that’s all I can promise.”
He gave a wry look. “Co-parent? Did you read that in a magazine or something?”
I laughed. “Probably. You don’t like the term?”
“I don’t know.” He shrugged. “You still love Dad, right?”
I sucked in a sharp breath and nodded. “Yes, I do.”
He smiled. “Yeah, it’s kind of obvious.”
*
I let Matt drive to church and was impressed by how well he did. “Dad’s been teaching me this week,” he explained.
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