Beautiful Disaster (A Pirate Romance book, Historical Romance)

by Myers, Heather C.

  The thought was a new one, and he frowned at it, not quite sure where it came from, exactly. However, the fact remained; he didn’t like that Izzy was the one who had been hurt by this bloke Zachary, or whatever they called him. His name didn’t matter.

  It was such an odd feeling, actually caring about the well-being of somebody other than himself. He could admit it; usually he was a selfish bastard, and came and left with the tide. He didn’t really like having a big ship for a big ship required a big crew. If he couldn’t handle the ship by himself then normally he wouldn’t commit to it. Johnny only liked to care about himself, which was why he wasn’t in any sort of relationship, didn’t have many friends, and really had no one he could rely on. It was why he chose to run away after Willow told him of what would become of him, why he out-right refused the position she had said he would inherit whether he liked it or not. And yet, here he was, completely dependent on a woman in this new, scary, and yet fascinating world. However, what struck him the most was that he didn’t necessarily mind it very much.

  Johnny continued to walk through the apartment, hoping to catch the young woman so they could converse over breakfast as they had the previous morning. However, the apartment looked completely empty. He stopped abruptly when he reached the door to her room. Maybe she was still sleeping…? After bringing his curled knuckles up to the door, he hesitated. The pirate didn’t want to wake her up… Maybe if he just opened the door slightly. If he saw her sleeping form still in bed, he would leave without a sound.

  And what if she’s indisposed? a voice asked him. Doing something you’re not supposed to see… What if she’s naked?

  “All the more reason to check on her,” he murmured to himself as his hand began to make its way to the doorknob. “What if she needs my help getting dressed?”

  Before Johnny could turn the knob and push the door open, an odd sound came from the front door. Johnny immediately straightened himself up and cast an odd glance at the door. Without even thinking about it, his right hand moved to his waist. It was then that Johnny remembered he had no weapons, no means to defend himself. Even when he first came here, Willow made it a point to have him leave his weapons behind. Well, maybe he could find something useful… The noise at the doorway persisted once again, and Johnny’s eyes darted over to it rather worriedly. Would now be the proper to time to burst into Izzy’s bedroom and warn her of a coming intruder? But then what about his reputation as a strong pirate?

  All his thoughts vanished, because at that moment, the door stated to open and Johnny had no way of stopping it.

  Chapter 9

  “I assure you,” Johnny announced as he placed his full weight against the door once he heard the odd fumbling sound persist, “though you may try, this door will not desist.”

  “Johnny?” the voice on the other side asked, slightly puzzled. It was vaguely familiar, and Johnny had the feeling that he should probably know this female. “It’s me, Bex.” Ah. There it was. “Care to let me in now?”

  “And how am I to know that you are really who you claim to be?” Johnny asked, though his warm chocolate brown eyes sparkled mischievously. Bex was a very pretty woman, and if he had encountered her back in his time, she would definitely be worth getting to know quite intimately. However, for whatever reason, upon encountering this new world, his libido had lacked luster, truth be told. Not that he would ever admit that aloud, of course, but though he saw many women that seemed to favor in substantially less clothing than he was used to, he didn’t have the necessary desire for any of them to actually follow through should he (or they) propose an offer.

  When Johnny realized this added predicament, he spent time wondering if waning sexuality was Willow’s doing, and concluded that it most probably was, just to spite him. So while Bex was definitely a beauty in her own right, Johnny harbored no such feelings to take their forming relationship to the next level. Instead, he liked teasing her as much as she liked teasing him. It would seem the two reveled in giving each other hard times and whatnot.

  “Let’s see,” Bex replied dryly, “if you look at the door, there’s this little hole that resembles a window. If you look through it, you will see it’s me.”

  Johnny turned, though his weight was maintained against the barricade, and peered through the peephole with his right eye. There she stood, in another pink number, her hands resting impatiently on her hips and her eyes glaring at the door expectantly. His lips curled up in amusement, deciding to push her just a little further. “Though you resemble the woman I know as Bex,” Johnny continued, “how am I to know it is really her?”

  “Johnny Clover Straight-Teeth, if you do not open this door right now, I will cut off a certain appendage of yours and give it back to you in pieces,” Bex said through gritted teeth.

  Johnny pressed his lips together to contain his chuckles, but finally relented. Somewhere in the back of his mind, a worried voice wondered if her threat was actually viable. “Ah!” he exclaimed, deciding not to think on that just yet. “You are Bex.” With that, he pushed off the door and allowed the young woman to open it.

  “Har har,” she muttered.

  Once inside, she closed and locked the door before dropping to her knees and looking at the boxes to make sure each one was marked with the appropriate title Bex had anointed Zach. Johnny placed his hands on his knees, leaning forward slightly to see what she was doing. “May I inquire as to what you are doing?” he asked her, arching a brow as she met his eyes.

  “You know,” Bex said, pursing her lips a bit. “For a pirate, you sure do speak well.”

  “I take that as a compliment,” Johnny said, grinning at her charmingly. “However, it has not slipped my notice that you have not yet answered my question.”

  Bex tried to keep her face straight and blank, but the way Johnny was speaking caused her lips to curl up. However, this was not due to amusement (though he did amuse her), but due to the charm that had laced itself in his low voice and even she could not resist all of it. She wondered how Izzy was doing such a good job of it. “Ever perceptive, are we?” she mocked in the same accent, before throwing her gaze down at the boxes. “What I am doing is to make sure Zach knows how Izzy and I feel about him.”

  Johnny’s eyes skimmed over a particular box with the word ASSHOLE in all capital letters. Underneath, there was an attempted sketch of stick figures that showed Bex doing exactly as she had threatened Johnny she would do to him. Cutting off this man’s – Johnny pulled on the neckline of the wife beater as his face contorted into a wince. Yes, the drawing was crude, but it got the point across, didn’t it? “Does Izzy know you labeled them as such?” he asked her, throwing his arms at the boxes and trying to push the horrible picture from his mind.

  Bex’s eyes softened and a matching smile touched her lips. “Izzy would never say anything like that to someone if she could help it,” she said, glancing over at Johnny. “She’s really one of the sweetest girls you’ll ever meet. Maybe a tad cynical, but sweet nonetheless. When she and Zach got together, everybody thought they made the cutest couple. I mean, they looked good together in pictures, they loved going to the movies and the beach, and they loved learning. To be honest, I never thought Zach would do anything like this to her.”

  “Yes, well even the prettiest picture isn’t ever perfect,” Johnny said, sitting down next to her. “They were together three years?”

  “Yup,” Bex said, nodding. “Three years. Izzy had never been with a guy for three years until Zach.”

  This struck Johnny as odd. “Why?” he asked.

  Bex shrugged, her brow rising as she stared in front of her. “I think that she doesn’t necessarily believe in a lasting relationship,” she replied. “I mean, her parents got divorced when she was young, and she never really had a male role model that encouraged her, reassured her, the usual Dad stuff. I think that she wants to believe that it’s out there for her because she really is a hopeless romantic, but she hasn’t found that… special someone that
she trusts enough to just… let go with. And even though she loved Zach and wanted him to be that guy, he really wasn’t, and she knew that.” She sighed, and for a moment, the two sat in a long silence, both processing what Bex said. “What about you, pirate boy?” she asked, throwing him a sidelong glance. “Do you have someone waiting for you back home?”

  “Absolutely not,” Johnny said, actually offended at such a notion. Bex couldn’t seem to contain her laughter at his facial reaction, and threw her head back to laugh aloud. “And what do you find so funny about this?”

  “Nothing, it’s just” - she said, trying to contain her amused reaction before finally getting control over herself. “Nothing, I guess I should have expected it, that’s all.” She tilted her head as she met her eyes, and pulled her knees close to her chest. “May I ask why?”

  “I don’t like being tied down,” Johnny said, slightly uncomfortable with this line of questioning. “I do not want to involve myself in a relationship when everybody knows it will turn into a farce with webs of lies scattered about. I know I could never be loyal to a woman – the world has too many to offer to pick just one for the rest of your life.” He paused and thought for a moment. “Look at Izzy, for instance,” he continued. “She’s probably hurt by this whole break-up nonsense. Don’t you think it would have been wiser for her to not have entered into the relationship in the first place?”

  Bex immediately shook her head. “No,” she replied. “I think that with every relationship, you can learn something new about yourself. I believe that everyone placed in your life is purposefully supposed to be there, to teach you something.”

  “Lessons aren’t worth learning if the lesson itself was a lie,” Johnny mumbled.

  “You must have been hurt,” Bex observed in a quiet voice. Finally, she raised her dark eyes to meet Johnny’s. “And if you found the right woman?”

  “I don’t think there is such a thing,” Johnny told her.

  “Cut the crap for a second,” she interjected, getting slightly frustrated. “If you found her, somebody who made you fall in love, who would be worth giving up everything for, who you would choose to be loyal for, would you engage in a monogamous relationship?”

  Johnny thought about it for a long moment before finally shaking his head. “Probably not,” he replied. “Even if I did find the nonsensical right woman, it would be guaranteed that one of us - although, more likely, it would be both of us - would get hurt, and because of this concept of love attached to each of us, the pain would only be greater.”

  Bex sighed dejectedly before a sad smile eclipsed her face. “I feel sorry for you,” she told him.

  “I feel sorry for you,” Johnny said, troubled by her pity. “For anyone who believes in happy endings and romance and love.”

  “Yeah, well, the thing is,” Bex said, standing up, “at least those of us who try to have a relationship have a better percentage of finding true love, true happiness, finding someone to grow old with. But for you, it’s a guarantee that you’ll die alone.” She paused for a minute, letting her words sink in, if they could sink in. “Now, come on. Help me move these boxes on the front patio. I really don’t want to deal with that asshole.”

  It took Johnny a moment to comprehend and then fulfill her request, only because he was quite startled at her blunt but true statement concerning his guaranteed death.

  Chapter 10

  Izzy walked through the door to find Johnny and Bex arguing once again about something or other. It was becoming quite common to find the two fighting about whatever, and Izzy was becoming quite accustomed to ignoring the two. In fact, there were times when Izzy would play devil’s advocate, which would just push their annoyance, amusing the young woman to no end. Luckily for her, her professor didn’t give them any homework, seeing how it was their first day back.

  Her eyes scanned the apartment, and a sigh of relief escaped her lips when she realized the boxes belonging to her ex-boyfriend – she refused to think his name - had disappeared. She didn’t want anything of his to litter her apartment anymore. Speaking of which, she needed to get Johnny new clothes. Despite the fact that he looked good in the ones he was wearing, she wanted him to have his own sense of style. He had one when he was back in the eighteenth century; no need to change that now.

  “Well, well, well,” Johnny said, mid-argument, leaving a disgruntled Bex flustered in the kitchen so he could stand in front of Izzy. “So she returns. Pray tell, where have you been exactly, darling, and why would you leave me with her?”

  Izzy pressed her lips together, trying to contain a very amused grin, but failing miserably. “I was at school,” she explained as she bustled into her room to drop off her book bag in favor of a small purse.

  Johnny was just on her heels, following her into the bedroom. “School?” Johnny asked in disbelief, completely forgetting his minor fight with the redheaded woman, still fuming in the kitchen. “Aren’t you too old to be going to school?”

  Izzy glanced over her shoulder, giving him a grin, as she removed all of her necessities from her book bag and into her purse. Instead of taking offense, her amusement deepened, and when she finished, she turned around. “Actually, you’d be surprised,” she told him. “College… university… whatever you want to call it, is quite common to attend, and before you say anything about me being a woman, it is more likely for women to attend college than men.”

  “What are you learning, exactly?” Johnny asked, his fingers touching his lips. “How smart are you? The women I come in contact with” -

  “No, there’s no sex class,” Izzy said, contorting a face of disgust.

  “But you’re educated in the subject, aren’t you?” he teased, his dark eyes lighting mischievously.

  “Oh, shut up,” she retorted, her cheeks turning a light shade of red. “Now, come on. I’m going to try and get you a job tonight, but I can’t exactly introduce you to my boss when you look like…” She glanced at him and made a face. “We need to get you new clothes. I have some money I’ve been saving up, so I can lend you some money to get you three or four outfits. You can always pay me back later.”

  Johnny placed his hands on his hips and rocked back and forth on the heels and balls of his feet. “You trust me that much?” he asked her, not sure what to make of her offer.

  “Should I not?” she asked, turning around to look at him. He didn’t say anything, really, just gave her an unreadable expression, so Izzy turned and headed out the door. “Bex,” she called before heading into the kitchen. “I’m taking Johnny to South Coast to get him some clothes. Do you wanna come?” Her brow perked as she regarded her friend patiently.

  “Absolutely,” Bex said as a dangerous smile slid onto her face, and her dark eyes narrowed resolutely. “I want to take pictures.”

  --

  Izzy drove everybody to the South Coast Plaza mall, ordering Johnny in the front seat of the car and Bex in the back. If anybody opened their mouth to fight, Izzy would just turn the radio up louder. Luckily the two were smart enough to get Izzy’s point, and the drive was mostly silent (save for the radio, of course) and tense. It took about fifteen minutes to reach the mall, and unsurprisingly, the parking lot was nearly full.

  “Where should we take him?” Izzy asked Bex, once the three exited the car.

  “Sears, JC Penny,” Bex said, shrugging.

  “Ladies, might I interject,” Johnny began, coming over to stand between the young women. “But what, exactly, is this place and why are we here?”

  “Okay,” Izzy began, already preparing her answer. “You know how in Port Royal there’s a down town section with numerous shops that sell different products?” Johnny thought about this and nodded slowly for a moment. “Right, well this is like that except it’s much more condensed.”

  “And much more expensive,” Bex put in with a roll of her eyes. “Oh, you know what?” she asked a bit more seriously. “We should probably warn him…” She looked over at Johnny. “Now, I don’t want to i
nflate your ego or anything, but you kind of look like the guy from the movie you watched. His name happens to be Johnny Depp. People may actually come up to you, girls may throw themselves at you, but you need to remember that you are not that man, so just say no to everything.”

  With that, the two led Johnny into the mall. What a sight it was for the pirate captain. An assortment of different people in different clothing littered different places of this ‘mall,’ talking and laughing, buying and returning. There were a bunch of different shops, serving food, clothing, and home décor. As Johnny followed the two women, he couldn’t take in everything fast enough. His mouth was hanging slightly open, and his dark eyes were shifting left, right, left, right… He was so consumed in everything that was going on around him that he didn’t notice people gaping at him slightly, whispering amongst themselves, while some actually pointed at him. Bex actually snapped at one woman, saying that this guy was most definitely not Johnny Depp because Johnny Depp was much hotter. Duh.