by H. D. Gordon
He tilted his head in a very wolf-like manner; now that I thought about it, he did things like that all the time. “Very. When we Turn, we change into real wolves, not the half-man, half-beast you’ve seen in movies, and because that is always inside of us, the traits of our wolf carry over into our human form.”
I guess that explained a lot. If Jackson’s wolf had chosen me as its mate, it made sense that he would get into so many fights over me in school before we came here, and how he was always concerned about me. It was both flattering and a little worrisome. I liked Jack. I might even love him. But I wasn’t sure if I was ready for a lifetime commitment.
He must have sensed my unease because he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. “Don’t freak out, darling, it’s not a big deal.”
“I’m not freaking out,” I lied.
He kissed my forehead. “Yes, you are, which is why I never told you before. I can smell it on you, you’re uncomfortable. Don’t worry. I’m not going to try to force you into an eternal relationship. I just want you to know that I would do anything to keep you safe, that I’ll always be here for you.”
“You can smell my emotions?”
He chuckled and shook his head. “That would be the part you comment on. But, no, not really your emotions. I just know you well enough to know what certain changes mean.
Plus, your heartbeat picked up in pace.”
I gave a low whistle. “Impressive.”
We had reached my dorm and I found myself not wanting Jackson to leave. He had a way of taking my mind off of things and making me just enjoy the moment. But I needed to get some rest, because tomorrow was a school day, and I had some extracurricular activities planned for after school.
Jack pulled me to him for a hug, but instead, I reached my hand behind his neck and brought my face up to his. I didn’t have much to compare it to, but it was a sweet kiss. His lips were soft and gentle, as if he were afraid of breaking me. My stomach was full of butterflies and my fingers trailed down his strong back as we stood in each other’s grasp. He pulled away first, and I stuck my bottom lip out in protest.
His eyes had lit up into that beautiful wolf-gold, and I got the feeling he was struggling to control himself. But he took a deep breath, and then laughed at my expression.
“Careful, darling, my wolf isn’t known for his self-control.” I smiled wickedly. “Neither is my Warrior.”
He made a sound deep in his throat that resembled a low growl. Then, he kissed my lips once more and rested his cheek on top of my head. “Good night, my love,” he whispered.
I wrapped my arms around him. “Good night, Jack.”
He kissed my forehead and gave me a small smile before turning away. I went up to my room and threw myself across the bed. I was feeling good for the first time today, but at the same time, I was conflicted. Because, while I should have gone to sleep thinking about Jackson, I fell asleep thinking of Kayden instead.
Chapter 47
The next morning, I got up early again and headed to Patterson’s class. I was feeling a little bit weak because I hadn’t really eaten anything yesterday. I was also planning on skipping my meals today. It might not be the smartest idea, but Soraya’s theory about something being in the food had kind of made me curious. I wasn’t sure how long I could go without eating, but I figured I’d give it a couple of days and see how I felt then. Waking up this morning proved that this was going to be harder than I’d thought. I was starving already.
When I walked into Patterson’s class, once again, he was already there setting up.
Now that I had him alone, I remembered that I’d wanted to ask him some questions about my Mother.
“Early again, Warrior?”
I nodded. “Yeah.”
He studied me a moment. “Is everything all right? You look a little pale.” Nothing was all right. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just couldn’t sleep last night.” He looked like he wasn’t sure he believed me, but he waved his hand toward the equipment he was dragging out. “Well, since you’re here, you want to give me a hand?”
“Sure.” I walked over to the supplies closet and began dragging out the heavy floor mats. Then, I took a deep breath. “How well did you know my mom?” Patterson stopped what he was doing and turned around to face me. After a moment, he said, “Very well.”
I stared at him for a moment, trying to imagine him being involved with my Mother. I supposed they would make a cute couple. Still, it was hard to picture my Mother being interested in anything other than training. Then again, maybe they’d had that in common.
I prepared myself to be denied an answer to my next question, but asked anyway. “Yesterday, you started to say something… something about how she would never have… well, I don’t know, what would she never have done?” He hesitated for so long I was pretty sure he wasn’t going to answer. But finally, he sighed and dropped the equipment he was holding. When he looked at me, I could tell it was almost as painful for him to speak about my Mother as it was for me. Any doubt I’d had about them having been involved vanished.
“She would have never let you come here,” he said at last.
I thought about all that had happened since I’d arrived at Two Rivers. I thought about my fight with Daniel and my fight with Victoria. I thought about Kayden and Soraya and the village. Things were obviously not right here, but really, nothing awful had happened to me yet. Despite that, I kind of had a feeling he was right.
“Why? Why wouldn’t she want me here?” I asked.
He looked down at the floor. “I’m sure she just wanted other things for you. To…
let you have an easier life than you can have here.”
He turned away then, and resumed setting up the equipment. I guessed that meant that he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. So, like always, I said something stupid.
“You loved her, didn’t you?” I whispered.
He had his back to me, but his large shoulders slumped and his head dropped down between them. He didn’t turn to face me, and when he spoke, it was barely audible.
“Very much.”
I looked down at my feet, fighting unwelcome tears. “I miss her so much.” When he turned to look at me, his face was composed, but his eyes were haunted in a way that only the loss of a loved one could cause. He still loved her, had never stopped, and as inappropriate as it may have been, I wanted to ask him about their time together. I wanted to hear tales of my Mother from someone who knew a side of her that I had never known. This also made me realize how much she must have sacrificed for me. I’d never thought about what she had left behind in order to keep me safe. I just wished I knew what she’d been keeping me safe from.
We stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity. Neither of us said a word, but so much passed between. I felt like we understood each other perfectly in that moment. We both felt the loss of a woman we loved very much. It was both comforting and disorienting for me. I wasn’t used to showing so much emotion in front of others, but at the same time, it was nice to know that someone else shared my grief.
As students starting entering the room, we returned to placing out the mats. But when Patterson began to call the class to attention, someone came through the door. It was Mark, the warrior I had met the other day when the Queen had asked to see me. I had a feeling he was coming to retrieve me again. This was confirmed as he went over and whispered something to Patterson, who looked at me and jerked his head so that I would approach.
“Warrior,” said Mark, with a small bow. “Queen Camillia has requested an audience.”
Patterson nodded to me and I followed Mark out the door. When we were out of the classroom, I walked alongside him. “It’s nice to see you again, Mark.” He smiled. “And you as well, Alexa.”
“Do you know why she wants to see me?” I asked, even though I was pretty sure I knew why.
“I wouldn’t know.”
“Well… do you know if I’m in trouble?”
He shrugged casually and gave a half smile. �
�Did you do something to be in trouble?”
“Not that I can recall,” I lied. I’d learned long ago not to admit to anything until I was sure of what I was being accused.
“Then you should be fine.”
I studied him for a moment, wondering if he knew about the incident with Victoria, but his face gave away nothing. Then, he reached up to adjust his collar and a red satin bracelet on his wrist caught my attention. It was small, with a red cloth was wrapped around a silver chain, and it sparkled in the sunlight. It wasn’t a delicate or a masculine piece of jewelry. It was just interesting.
“That’s pretty,” I commented, pointing at his wrist.
He looked down at his hand and snorted. “Yeah, I guess.”
My brow furrowed at his reaction. “What is it?”
“A marker, we wear them when it is our turn in the Arena.” I thought back to when Tommy asked me to see the fight with him this weekend.
He’d told me that at the end of every month, there was a fight between the warriors. My stomach clenched as the realization settled over me. I liked Mark. I didn’t want him to get hurt over the sake of entertainment.
“You’re the one fighting this weekend,” I said, more to myself than to him.
He nodded. “We wear the bracelets so that people can observe the contestants.
So that they can place their money on who they assume is the strongest fighter.” My jaw dropped as I processed what he was saying. “People place bets on the fighters?”
He glanced at me and nodded again. “Yes.”
Everything that went through my head to say to that involved multiple curse words, so I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself. Of course there would be bets on the fights, why wouldn’t there be?
“I’ll be rooting for you then,” I said, as we continued our walk.
He smiled. “You’re going to the fight?”
“I wasn’t going to, but if you’re fighting, then yeah, I’m coming.” He gave a curt nod. “Want to see how it’s done, huh?”
I laughed. “No, but someone has to cheer for you.” He laughed and we ascended the stairs of the Council building. Like always, I got nervous as we entered the enormous silver-trimmed foyer. Just like last time, he led me to the Queen’s office and gave me a small smile. “Good luck.”
I hated when people had to say that to me. I thanked him and took a deep breath before opening the door. I wasn’t excited about this meeting. The last time I’d been here, she’d given me the worst news of my life. That knowledge actually comforted me though. There wasn’t much else that could hurt me as bad as learning of my Mother’s death.
I entered the room and found the Queen sitting in the same chair as last time.
She was drinking a cup of tea again, and was wearing a professional-looking grey skirt and jacket with a silver shirt underneath. I wondered if her attire always included silver. Probably.
“Young Warrior,” she said in greeting.
I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes. “Your majesty.” She gestured to the couch. “Please, have a seat.”
I sat down and waited for her to speak. When I was met with silence, I remembered how she annoyingly always made me ask questions before giving answers. I bit my lip and clenched my fists. “You wanted to see me?”
She studied me over her cup for a moment, and I felt my irritation grow. Why couldn’t this woman ever just come on out and say what was on her mind? You’d think a queen would have better people skills. She was just skilled at pissing me off.
Finally, she cleared her throat and said, “Is there anything you’d like to tell me?” I shifted a little, but managed to hold her gaze. “Um, I don’t think so.” Her sharp eyebrows shot up. “I see. So, you didn’t choke Victoria Talis yesterday in the school cafeteria?”
I swallowed hard, but mostly I was just grateful that this wasn’t about Soraya and the village. It had hit me upon walking in her office that she might be calling me in because she knew about my trip through the forest. I could handle being in trouble myself, but I would have never forgiven myself if I’d gotten Soraya in trouble.
I nodded slowly, pretending to think about it. “Oh, actually, yes, I did.” No point in lying.
She took another sip of tea. “I see.”
God, that was annoying. I wanted to tell her that she didn’t need glasses then.
Instead, I asked, “Am I in trouble?”
She set her teacup down on the table beside her chair and folded her hands in her lap. “Well, that depends. Would you mind telling me why you did so?” I took my time in answering. Because she poured a drink on me didn’t sound like a good answer, so I picked the only other one I had. “She made me mad.” Okay, that answer kind of sucked too, but it was true.
“Do you get angry often?” she asked.
I narrowed my eyes a little. I hate being patronized. “Sometimes… but only when it’s warranted,” I replied stiffly.
She pretended not to notice my tone. “And you feel Victoria deserved to be choked in front of all of her peers?”
Yes. “She deserved something,” I said. “She came looking for a fight.” As I said this, I realized I was right. I still felt like a monster for what I’d done, but at the same time, I wasn’t the one who initiated the confrontation. I just finished it.
To my utter astonishment, the Queen agreed with me. “True, she should have known better that to make enemies with a Warrior.” I nodded. “But,” she continued and I sighed- there’s always a ‘but’- “Even a Warrior should be careful of whom she chooses for enemies as well.”
I almost snorted, but caught myself. “You think that Victoria could take me?” I know that sounded egotistical but, seriously?
She gave me a look that seemed to suggest a little modesty. I raised my eyebrows and waited. I wasn’t about to take lessons on being humble from a woman who sat with a silver spoon in her mouth.
“No, I don’t think she could harm you physically,” she said, her words clipped,
“but seeing as how Victoria is the daughter of Lady Talis, she requires certain… finesse.” That gave me pause. “Her mother is on the Council?”
The Queen nodded gravely. “And you can imagine the outrage her mother was in yesterday when she found out her daughter was humiliated in front of the entire student population.”
I looked down at my hands, but she continued, “She wanted to have you severely punished. I told her we would do no such thing.”
My head jerked up, and I’m sure my face looked utterly surprised. I didn’t think it was the wisest thing, but I asked anyway. “Why did you do that?” She smiled then. “Because, you are more important than a spoiled little brat like Victoria. You are the last Sun Warrior left and should be treated as such, by everyone, even the daughter of a Council member.” She paused, then added, “You also saved my life, and considering the suggestions put forth by Lady Talis for you punishment, I would say that this makes us even.”
I was absolutely shocked. Not just because the Queen had called Victoria a
“spoiled little brat”, but because she had stuck up for me against someone on her own royal Council. Maybe I should save people’s lives more often.
“But if this should happen again, you will be on your own,” she added.
I nodded my understanding, still too floored to say anything.
“Also, I want you to take today off from your studies. You need to take a day to just relax and enjoy your blessings instead of dwelling on the things that have so upset you over the last couple weeks.”
I didn’t want to miss school, but I agreed. I had to take what I could get. “Thank you,” I said.
She smiled again, and I couldn’t help a small smile of my own. She had done me a huge favor, and I wouldn’t forget it. When I stood to leave, she called out to me before I stepped through the door.
“And Warrior?” she called.
I turned back. “Yes, your majesty?”
“Let’s try and keep a hold
on that temper, shall we?”
I nodded and left. No need to tell her that I was always trying, and that it seemed to be getting harder and harder to hold on to.
Chapter 48
As I left the Queen’s office, I found Mark standing at his post right outside the door. He smiled upon seeing my completely astonished expression.
“Just a slap on the wrist then?” he asked, grinning broadly.
I shook my head. “More like a pat on the head.”
He chuckled, making his usually serious face even more handsome. “You are one lucky little lady.”
“Guess so,” I replied. If you could call all the things that had been happening to me lately lucky. I didn’t really agree.
“The fight is on Saturday.”
I gave a reassuring smile. “I’ll be there.”
I exited the Council building, trying to decide what to do with my day. I had planned on visiting Kayden today so that I could demand some answers out of him, but if I had the whole day to myself, I knew where I should go if I really wanted answers.
So, I headed to my room and retrieved the compass Soraya had given me. As I went to use the bathroom before I left, I caught a glance of myself in the mirror. I looked like I felt. I hadn’t eaten for over a day now and it was starting to show. My skin was pale and my eyes had dark circles under them. I felt like I could devour an entire cow. I knew I required a lot of food to keep me going, but I hadn’t known that it would suck this bad. I wasn’t even sure if I was up to the trip, but I had to try.
I splashed some water on my face, pulled my hair back into a pony-tail and headed out with my compass in hand. I went to the spot that I had entered the trees before and checked the compass to make sure that it pointed south. I wasn’t exactly sure if this would get me back to the village, but I figured that if I started in the same spot and headed in the opposite direction I’d taken to get back, I couldn’t be that far off.
I tried to move quickly because I knew that it was a long trip, but the heat of the day seemed to be more suffocating than it usually was. I felt light-headed and a little nauseated as I pushed through the trees. After about an hour, I realized that I should have packed some food for this trip. It had been foolish of me to think that I could use so much energy on an empty stomach.