Heart of Rockies 03 - More Than a Feeling

by Sara Richardson

Sawyer’s knee pumped. This was taking too long. “I think it’s time to use the GPS.” He’d already handed her his phone, but she insisted on using paper.

  “Wait a minute!” she shrieked. Her head cranked and she looked back over her shoulder. “I think we missed our turn back there.”

  He tried not to grimace. She’d come all this way with him, she’d kept him positive, and she’d done most of the work with Nell, which, considering the way the dog behaved on the plane, made Aunt Elsie a saint.

  “Yes, yes, yes.” She traced her finger along a line on the map. “We definitely have to turn around.”

  “Roger that,” he said, trying to lighten the weight that bore down on his shoulders. Slowing the car, he checked his blind spot and flipped a U-turn.

  “It’ll be the next left,” she said. “I think.”

  Great. He swiped at his face. Between the stress and the humidity, he’d need a shower soon.

  “You missed the turn!”

  Damn it. He had to focus. They were so close…

  Heaving out a sigh, he flipped another U-turn, heading back the direction they’d come.

  “So you’re sure—”

  The sound of sirens cut him off. Louder. They were getting louder. He glanced in the rearview mirror.

  His heart felt like it was clanking against his ribs. Three cop cars.

  “Shit,” he muttered quietly so Aunt Elsie wouldn’t hear.

  “Don’t worry.” She reached over to pat his arm. “I’m sure it’s nothing.” But her voice had lost the happy ring.

  Sawyer pulled the car over to the curb, and the patrol cars flew past, lights flashing, sirens blaring.

  They turned left a few blocks ahead.

  “That’s our turn.” Even his chipper, eternal optimist aunt looked downright scared.

  She didn’t have to tell him because he already knew. That sick feeling had sunk into his gut, the one that told you something bad was about to happen.

  He’d seen some bad shit as a cop. Not nearly what it could’ve been, thanks to Aspen’s relatively low crime rate, but he’d been on the scene of a couple of fatal accidents, a suicide, a few ugly domestic disputes. And none of it made his heart pound as hard, or his stomach feel as sick as it did right now.

  He glanced back to pull onto the road, but an ambulance barreled toward them. He knew enough to know that was a bad sign. A very bad sign.

  A split second after the ambulance passed, he gunned the engine, following behind.

  “Slow down. She’s fine,” Aunt Elsie said over and over.

  She’s fine. In the midst of dying hope, he held on to those words to keep him afloat.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Sirens whined far the distance, but Derek’s truck bounced into the driveway five minutes too soon.

  “Oh my god,” Ruby’s new friend, Jamie, gasped. “He’s here.” Terror flared in her sunken eyes.

  A surge of red-hot anger cleansed the panic that chipped away at her confidence. She’d felt that same terror so many times when she would see his massive red truck pull into the driveway. She’d run around the house, making everything look perfect, so afraid that one thing out of place would set him off. But she didn’t fear him anymore. The sight of Jamie cowering inside the doorway reinforced her determination. She might’ve been weak when it came to Derek before, but now she had someone else to protect. And Ruby would make sure he could never force anyone to live in fear again.

  “Go inside,” Ruby told Jamie, noticing the woman had started to visibly shake. “Lock the door.”

  “Come with me,” she pleaded. “We can hide in here and wait…”

  But Ruby started to close the door. “The cops will be here in a few minutes.” And besides that, she wanted to see Derek’s face when he saw her standing there.

  Jamie froze like she was torn, so Ruby gently pushed her inside and latched the door. “Lock it,” she said as Derek came around the back of his truck.

  Halfway to the yard, he looked up and saw her. His steps stuttered to a stop. “Kate.”

  At the sound of his voice, memories flashed, blinding her with images of Derek flying at her, raising his fist to hit her, bracing his forearm against her neck to strangle her. The images whorled with the present and rage iced her body over, making her feel unbreakable. She gazed down on him, heart beating wildly, building a violent force inside her. He looked the same. Tall and broad across the shoulders, arms rippled with muscle. His brown hair was still cropped into that crew cut that made him resemble a soldier, but his eyes had changed. They were worn and sagged like someone who’d been beaten by fatigue. Looking at his eyes reminded her he was just a person. A pathetic, miserable person who could no longer touch her. “Hi, Derek,” she said, steady and in control. The same peace that steadied her voice radiated all through her. He couldn’t touch her.

  “What the fuck are you doing here?” He charged at her, but she stood her ground, somehow knowing he would stop before he got to her. In all the years she was with him, he never once raised his voice at her in public.

  “Bet you never thought you’d see me again.” A smile emerged at the shock in his expression. His lips were clamped but his nose flared with heavy breaths. He didn’t know what the hell to do.

  “Get off my property,” he growled.

  The sirens whined closer, fueling her courage, but he didn’t seem to notice them.

  “Why? Are you afraid the neighbors’ll hear what a monster you are?” She stepped to the edge of the porch, looking down on him, taunting him with a smile. “Because I saw what you did to Jamie. And I called the cops. I’m not afraid anymore.”

  His jaw ticked. “You’re a liar. You took off and as far as everyone knows, I was devastated. No one’ll believe a fucking word you say.”

  “Maybe not.” He’d looked at her that same way hundreds of times, angry and hateful, and it always used to scare her into silence. But now it made her stronger. “Jamie and I had a nice chat. She’d like a divorce, by the way.” Once the police had charged him and the divorce was final, the woman would get everything. She’d be set for life.

  “She won’t leave me,” he said with that snide arrogance. Like he was untouchable, above the law.

  Was he? Oh, god. Would anyone believe them? “You broke her arm, asshole,” she said, a tingling ringing through her fingertips. Her control was starting to slip. Blood burned through her veins, anger turning into something more dangerous, something that tempted her to jump off that porch like she’d jumped off the platform on the ropes course so she could punch him and kick him and hurt him the way he’d hurt her.

  But those sirens. They blared louder and louder. The police would help them, right? They would knock him down…

  Derek seemed to notice the noise, then. He looked left and right.

  Three cop cars flew down the road and screeched to a stop in front of the house.

  “By the way,” she called over the sirens. “We reported an assault.”

  Derek wasn’t looking at her anymore. He’d turned around. “They won’t take me in.”

  “They will once they see Jamie’s arm. Once she tells them what happened.” They couldn’t ignore both of them. She wouldn’t let them.

  An ambulance skidded to a stop right as the policemen jumped out of their cars. Two of them jogged over. The front door opened and Jamie stepped out. She’d changed into a short-sleeved shirt, making the damage to her arm visible.

  “He attacked me,” she told the officers through a sob. “He broke my arm.”

  Derek flew into a rage, screaming at them and swearing. He went to deck one of the officers but the man ducked, then wrestled him down to the ground. “Easy. Don’t do anything you’ll regret.”

  Ruby let out the breath she’d been holding. She reached over to squeeze Jamie’s good hand.

  The other officers gathered around them, firing off questions. Two EMTs bolted up the walkway.

  But a shout broke through the chaos.

 
“Ruby!”

  That voice. She knew that voice. Sawyer had come for her. The fury that had given her body so much power receded, draining away her strength. She only wanted to be in Sawyer’s arms, to cling to him until she could stand on her own again. The world blurred in shimmering waves. Pushing past the men who hemmed them in, she floated down the stairs, scanning, searching…

  “Ruby!”

  From behind the police cars, Sawyer sprinted hard toward her. She tried to run across the grass, but her feet dragged like they’d been encased in concrete. So instead of running, she slogged until her legs lost power and she slumped to her knees. But it was okay because Sawyer was there, too. On his knees, holding her up in a sturdy embrace, kissing everything his lips could reach—the top of her head, her forehead, her cheeks, her lips.

  She nestled her head against his chest to shut out the chaos around her. His heart beat so fast…

  “God, Ruby. God.” He smoothed his hands over her hair, her arms, her torso. “I thought he’d hurt you. You’re not hurt?”

  “No. I’m not hurt.” She inched in closer, until he was all she felt, until his body became her shelter. Breathing deeply she inhaled his woodsy scent—the freshness of grass and sunshine—and she felt like she was home. “You’re here.”

  “I’ll always find you. Got that?” He smoothed his hand over her hair again, like he wanted to make sure she was really there. “So don’t bother trying to outrun me again.”

  “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” She shifted to her knees so she could look into his eyes, so blue and calming. Her heart sped up and this time it wasn’t anger or fear fueling that pressure inside of her, it was a brand of passion she’d never felt before.

  “Don’t be sorry anymore,” he whispered right before he brushed her lips with a tender kiss. “I’ve never been happier than I am right now.”

  “Me neither.” It was over. The past would always be there—she couldn’t erase it completely, but she didn’t fear it anymore. It couldn’t hold her back. “Thank you. For coming all the way here.” For proving to her that she didn’t have to face her struggles alone.

  Sawyer held her shoulders in his hands, like he didn’t want her to run again, like he didn’t want her to even move. “I’d go anywhere with you. And I’m staying in Aspen. Chief offered me a promotion.”

  Her hands shook. She was almost afraid to believe him. “But what about being a detective?”

  “I never cared about the job,” he said, stroking her cheek. “I was running away. But I don’t have a reason to run anymore.”

  So he was staying. With her. Happiness ran all through her, so overwhelming that tears gathered and spilled over. “Sawyer…” She sunk against him and he held her there, head against his chest so his heart could beat new life into her…

  “Yarf! Yarf!”

  A sharp inhale stabbed her lungs. She braced her hands against Sawyer’s chest and peered over his shoulder.

  Elsie traipsed across the yard with that loving smile intact.

  “You brought Elsie! And Nellie!”

  “They didn’t give me a choice.” Sawyer scrambled to his feet and pulled her up, but he didn’t let go of her hand.

  Nellie ripped the leash out of Elsie’s hand and leapt into Ruby’s arms, whining and licking her face. “If you brought Nellie, that means—”

  “She’s yours. You were right.” He tousled the dog’s fur. “She had some old injuries. The vet said it was obvious she’d been abused.”

  “Nellie. Oh, sweet Nellie.” She buried her face in the dog’s fur.

  “Excuse me.” A police officer approached. “Are you the one who called in the assault?”

  Sawyer steadied a hand on her back.

  “Yes.” She knelt and set Nellie on the grass, then stood, stronger with Sawyer’s hand on her. “He assaulted me multiple times a few years back. When we were engaged.”

  The officer nodded. “They’re taking Mrs. Alders to the hospital. We’ll need you to come down to the station to help with the report.”

  “Of course.”

  Sawyer’s arm slipped around her waist. “I’ll drive her.”

  The officer gave them the address and they all walked to the car.

  “Everything’ll be okay,” he said, rubbing her shoulder.

  And this time she believed him.

  * * *

  “Aunt Elsie would kill me if she knew I was staying in your room,” Sawyer said, carrying in the last box from the storage unit he’d helped her clean out.

  Before she’d left Cherryville, Ruby hadn’t had the heart to throw away any of Miss James’s things, especially not the pictures and little trinkets the woman had kept on her bookshelves.

  “Elsie doesn’t have to know,” she said with a raise of her eyebrows, though something told her Elsie wouldn’t mind. After a long afternoon at the station and then a quick stop by the storage unit, she didn’t want to be alone. And since Elsie and Nellie had already headed to the airport to fly back home, Sawyer was her only option. Not that she minded. He’d volunteered to stay and help her deal with the things she’d left behind, so they’d found a cozy little inn on the edge of town, nestled in the beginning of the forest. It was quaint and intimate, the perfect place to sort through the memories of her past. And she was beginning to remember that it wasn’t all bad.

  She sliced the tape on another box and opened it. Books—Miss James had loved to read. She used to lend Ruby her old hardbacks, giving her the chance to escape into the stories. She picked one up. Treasure Island. She remembered reading that one. Mama had never gotten involved in her schoolwork, but Ruby’s teachers always marveled at how well she could read. A smile radiated from her heart as she leafed through the pages.

  A small Polaroid print slipped out of the book and fluttered to the floor. She bent to pick it up, studying the grainy image. It was the image of a younger version of herself, complete with that stringy hair and those knobby knees. She stood by Miss James, who must’ve been in her sixties then. Since she’d known her, the woman always had soft white hair that she’d kept in a braid down her back, and a rounded body that reminded Ruby of Mrs. Claus.

  She stared down at the picture, tumbling back in time. That was the day she’d had to leave home. Her younger face was stark, like she’d seen something that had spooked her. The social worker had come knocking at the door, telling Ruby and Grady they needed to pack up some things and come with her for a while. It hadn’t taken long because she didn’t have much to pack, but on the way down the driveway, she’d asked if she could say good-bye to Miss James.

  They took a picture, and Miss James had given her a copy, too, though she’d lost it somewhere along the way. Just before she left, the woman had knelt to hug her, and when Ruby started to cry, she’d wiped away the tears. “It will all turn out. Someday you’ll find your happy ending just like in all of those books you read. You’ll see.” The words echoed back to her and filled her eyes with tears.

  “You doing okay?” Sawyer asked. He’d been so concerned for her all day. “Maybe you should take a break.” He came up behind her and dug his fingers into her shoulders, kneading away all the tension that had built over the last hours.

  “No, I’m fine,” she murmured, but she lost one more car on the train of thought with each caress. She dipped her head forward so he could get at the knot that had been straining her neck. “I’m happy.” Tired but happy. Her head dropped forward as she continued the massage.

  “That’s your old neighbor?” Sawyer asked, peering over her shoulder and studying the picture.

  “Yes. That’s Miss James.” One by one the tears slipped down her cheeks. “She looked out for me when I had no one else.”

  His finger traced the name scrawled on the picture’s label. Kate McPherson. “So your real name is Kate.”

  “Yes.”

  He rested his chin on her shoulder. “It doesn’t feel right calling you Kate.”

  She leaned her cheek against his. “It doe
sn’t feel right to be called Kate.” Not anymore. “I’m such a different person now.”

  “It wouldn’t be hard to change your name,” he said, stroking her skin.

  She turned to peer into his eyes, to feel that steadying peace wash over her. “Do you think I should?”

  “I think you should do what makes you happy.” He took the picture from her hand and set it aside. “After everything you’ve been through, you deserve to be happy.”

  “I want to do it, then.” She couldn’t think of a better way to honor Miss James. “Ruby James. It feels right.”

  “Ruby,” Sawyer repeated with a heart-stirring grin. “Not sure about James, though.”

  “Why is that?” she asked, inching closer to him.

  He shrugged as though he didn’t know, but his eyes glimmered with a different story. “You might have to change it again someday. Don’t want to have to do it twice.”

  She reached up her arms, lacing her hands at the back of his neck. His skin was so warm and wonderful. An electrical surge rolled through her heart. “And what would I have to change it to?”

  “I can think of a possibility,” he murmured, lowering his lips to hers, lighting the fuse of desire until it sparked low in her belly. One week ago she never would’ve dared to hope that she would be discussing possibilities with a man like Sawyer.

  “I like possibilities,” she whispered between the sensual movement of his lips against hers.

  He pulled away, eyes heated with passion, and moved the boxes off the bed. “I love you, Ruby.” He took her hands in his and tugged her close enough that she could feel his heart pound against her chest. Hers answered with a devastating longing.

  “I love you, too,” she said, already working at the buttons on his shirt. She couldn’t be apart from him anymore. All she wanted was to be wrapped in his arms, enveloped in the heat of his body against hers, as he buried himself inside of her until she succumbed to the pleasure of being his.

  “Make love to me, Sawyer Hawkins,” she said, pushing him down to the mattress. He caught her hand and pulled her down with him.

  This time, nothing would stand between them. No lies. No pretenses. Just him and her and the beautiful possibility of a happy ending.