Wish Upon a Star

by Trisha Ashley

  ‘Promise?’

  ‘Promise. And it’ll be the best Christmas ever, because you’ll be well again.’

  ‘Come on, our Stella,’ Ma called, and Stella finally released her stranglehold on Jago’s neck and ran to Ma, who took one hand and Jenny the other.

  I looked at Jago hopelessly. ‘I keep going hot and cold and I feel I’m moving through a dream-like trance – or a nightmare. It’s all so unreal, I can’t believe I’m doing this.’

  ‘I know it must seem surreal but you have to take this chance for Stella’s sake. There’s no going back. Only I want you to keep in contact and tell me what’s happening every step of the way, because I’m going to be thinking about you all the time. And just say the word and I’ll fly out.’

  ‘Oh, Jago!’ I said, feeling my lip trembling, and then somehow our goodbye kiss turned into a reprise of the epic kiss we’d had at the fête and time stopped in its tracks.

  Then we broke apart, and he touched my cheek and smiled. ‘Boldly go, as they used to say in Star Trek.’

  I grinned weakly: ‘Oh, beam me up, Scotty!’

  Jago

  Jago sat in his car in the airport car park, his head resting on the steering wheel and his heart winging its way towards Boston with Cally.

  Logically he knew Cally was right and he needed to stay and get his business up and running, but he still would have dropped everything and gone with them, if she had only given the word.

  Not that he had any rights in the matter, despite loving them both, of course.

  Then he thought about that last kiss … whatever scale that was on, it was so far away from platonic it had probably dropped off the end. Had that been just a need for comfort, or was she beginning to care for him? Only time would tell.

  But she certainly hadn’t given much thought to what would happen after they returned and it would probably be some time before she would be in a position to move back to London … if she still wanted to.

  Then and there, Jago hatched a plan to offer them the annexe at Honey’s to live in after Christmas, for as long as they needed it. He’d put off finishing the attic and the annexe till a later date, but now the task of turning the annexe into a wonderful guest suite in the hope Cally would agree would give him something to occupy his mind with.

  Chapter 39: To Infinity and Beyond

  I’d never flown business class before and neither had Jenny, but it was so much more comfortable than tourist class. They gave Stella a special child’s goodie bag and then seemed to be constantly offering us food or drink, though Stella, exhausted by excitement, was soon fast asleep in her reclining seat, thumb in mouth and Bun tucked in under her cheek. Ma soon followed suit and could be heard gently snoring.

  It was a long flight, but due to the five hours difference we arrived at Logan International airport outside Boston practically before we set out, though of course it didn’t feel like that.

  I staggered off the plane well and truly jetlagged, but Stella and Ma seemed surprisingly fresh and Jenny said it had all been so comfortable compared to her usual flight over that it had been a complete pleasure.

  Jenny’s family met us at the airport, bringing with them the buggy they were kindly loaning me for Stella. Jenny had already given me their address and phone number and promised Stella she’d come to visit her soon.

  We got into a yellow cab with a friendly driver who told Stella she could call him George and then chatted with her all the way out to the Best Western in the Longwood Medical Area, where we were staying.

  She told him she was going to the hospital to have her heart mended and he assured her that he’d driven lots of much sicker children than her to the hospital and when he took them back to the airport to go home, they were all as good as new.

  I could have kissed him, because Stella took this as gospel, though why she should have believed a cabbie over me or anyone else, I’ve no idea. But I was just grateful she did.

  The hotel was literally next to the hospital, so it couldn’t be handier, and they’d given us a two-bedroom suite, which was much swisher than anything I’d stayed in in the UK. Ma had one room and Stella and I shared the other, twin-bedded one.

  We unpacked while Stella had a nap on the bed, and then went out for a little stroll around the area and an early dinner in the hotel.

  We had the weekend free and had already planned to go to see the New England Aquarium and perhaps the Children’s Museum on Sunday, if Stella wasn’t too tired.

  Ma came to the aquarium with us, bringing her sketchbook and making lots of drawings, because it was the most amazing place with seals and penguins, and a vast tank with a coral reef in it, which riveted Stella.

  Stella tired first, so we left Ma there and went to find lunch – and discovered the delights of Boston cream pie. Why had no one ever told me about this wonderful creation before?

  Boston cream pie is local speciality, I texted Jago. But it’s a cake.

  Trust you to find local cake on first day in Boston! he texted back. Bring recipe.

  Jago and I had been exchanging texts and emails since we landed, but I was already missing the sound of his voice.

  Come to that, I was desperately missing everything about him!

  Ma and Stella were both so enchanted with the aquarium that we went back again next morning, which I didn’t mind so long as I got to eat more cake afterwards. I needed it to calm my nerves, along with any variety of Reese’s Peanut Butter goodies I could get my hands on. Stella had developed a liking for Reese’s Pieces, which are candy coated and a little like a peanut butter version of Smarties, though unlike me, she made a bag last her all day.

  Ma came out to lunch with us this time, then went off to some art gallery, and Stella and I went back to the hotel so she could rest. Later on, when Ma had returned and she and Stella were in her room drawing very strange angel fish, Jago called and I can’t tell you how wonderful it was to hear his voice.

  He seemed to feel the same, because he said, ‘You’re so far away, but you sound close. How’s the hotel?’

  ‘Really comfortable and very handy for the hospital and everything else. We’ve been to the aquarium twice – it’s huge, much bigger than any I’ve ever seen.’

  ‘And you’ve found the Boston cream pie!’

  ‘Yes, though like I said, it’s not a pie at all, it’s a big sponge cake with a vanilla patisserie cream filling and a chocolate ganache topping. Apparently you can get mini ones too, and Boston doughnuts, which sound a bit like those Krispy Kreme ones …’

  I paused. ‘Tomorrow we go into the hospital to meet Dr Beems and then Stella will be admitted the day after … There was a letter waiting at the reception when we arrived, with a map and some leaflets.’

  ‘How’s she doing?’

  ‘She seems pretty well, considering the flight, though she did sleep for most of it. I was the one who got off the plane like a zombie. We’ve been concentrating on having a fun weekend and not thinking about anything else.’

  Stella came in from Ma’s room and I said, ‘Hello, darling, do you want to speak to Jago?’

  She nodded and I handed her the mobile, though I held her close so I could still hear him. She told him that the cab driver had taken lots of little girls and boys to the hospital and they’d all come out as good as new, because they had the best doctors there in the whole wide world.

  ‘Of course they do,’ I could hear him saying.

  ‘And they have the best red socks too,’ Stella added, which she’d seemed to find so impressive that I hadn’t yet had the heart to explain that they were a local baseball team. ‘And a huge ’quarium. But I wish I could come home now and not go to hospital.’

  ‘I wish you could, too. But the special doctor there will make you better while you’re having a little sleep and when you’re well again, you and Mummy can have a holiday.’

  ‘Jenny says I have to be brave and then she’s going to bring me a Salem witch doll.’

  ‘You are brave,
Stella, and when you get home, we’re going to make that gingerbread castle with Mummy and there’s going to be a huge Christmas party.’

  ‘Do you think Father Christmas got my list?’

  ‘I’m sure he did and he’s got the elves working on it right now,’ he said.

  ‘I asked him for snow, too. I’ve never seen snow.’

  ‘Yes, you have,’ I put in.

  ‘Well, I don’t remember,’ she said crossly. ‘And I want snow.’

  Then she handed me the phone back and inserting her thumb into her mouth, started sucking furiously.

  ‘Come on, our Stella,’ Ma said, coming in and summing up the situation. ‘We’ll go and see if we can find a half-decent cup of tea somewhere in this place.’

  When the door had closed behind them I confessed, ‘I’m getting terrified, Jago, but I’m trying not to show it, because she’s already nervous. She’s cross and very clingy too, and that’s just not like her.’

  ‘She’s bound to feel frightened, however reassuring you are. I’ll ring you again tomorrow, to see how the first appointment went.’

  ‘I should phone you – it’s going to cost a fortune.’

  ‘It doesn’t matter,’ he said, ‘at a time like this, it really, really doesn’t matter.’

  Ma went with us to the appointment with Dr Beems next day and I think we all felt better once we’d met him. He was a small, plump and friendly man. Stella told him that he looked just like a penguin she’d seen the day before at the ’quarium.

  ‘I’ll take that as a compliment,’ he said, and admired the penguin family she’d taken in her pocket for comfort.

  ‘I’ve got a doctor rabbit, too,’ she said, warming to him. ‘But there should be a doctor penguin, shouldn’t there?’

  Then she informed him that she didn’t like having big needles stuck in her arm and he assured her they weren’t going to do that today. I think he realised how bright she was for her age, because he explained to her in simple terms that while she was having a sleep, they were going to make her heart work just like everyone else’s and then a friendly nurse took her out and he went into a lot more detail about what he was going to do.

  I’d been trying not think too much in advance about how machines would take over the work of keeping Stella’s little body going while they performed their miracle of surgery … but suddenly now I knew too much. My head throbbed and my palms went clammy as I signed the forms.

  ‘It’s a bigger operation than she’s ever had before,’ Ma said. ‘But pray God it all goes well and it’s the last.’

  ‘Amen to that,’ the doctor echoed. ‘I promise to do my very best.’

  Back at the hotel I gave Stella the new polar bear family I’d brought with me especially for this moment, which proved a good distraction. She told them that they would be right at home when they got back to Sticklepond, because it was going to snow, so I started to hope we’d have a hard winter!

  But later she was clingy and tearful and I had to lie down on the bed with her before she would fall asleep for her nap. That evening, after an early dinner, it seemed easiest to let her watch cartoons on the huge TV in bed until she fell asleep.

  Then I sneaked into Ma’s room and rang Jago to describe the hospital visit.

  ‘Dr Beems is very nice, though he made sure we realised the dangers of the surgery. But he seemed confident that she had a very good chance of coming through and making a good recovery.’

  ‘And she goes in tomorrow, ready for the operation the next day?’

  ‘Yes, and I can stay with her. They showed us the room and there’s a chair that folds down to a bed, and a shower and stuff – it’s not like in the UK.’

  ‘I’m glad you have Martha with you, but I wish I could be there too, even if they wouldn’t let me stay with you.’

  ‘Ma will come back to the hotel after the operation, as soon as we know she’s out of danger. Stella will be in intensive care right afterwards, but I’ll be able to stay with her then, too, until they move her back into her ordinary room. Everyone’s very nice and friendly, but the hospital is so big and bustling and … well, different from our hospitals.’

  ‘I suppose they are – I only really know what they’re like from watching series like House and Scrubs,’ he said.

  ‘I haven’t seen either of those.’

  ‘That’s probably just as well,’ he assured me.

  It was another surreal moment taking Stella to the hospital next day, as though we were in some film with a life-and-death drama and it wasn’t really happening at all.

  Jago said later that he felt exactly the same, that none of it could be happening. Then he passed on messages of love and support from lots of people in the village and David and Sarah.

  ‘It’s lovely to know they’re all thinking of us, and Celia and Will keep emailing and texting, too. There was already a bouquet of flowers and a message from Adam’s parents at the hotel when we arrived.’

  ‘How’s Stella coping now?’

  ‘She’s gone very quiet. Ma’s with her and then I’ll stay the night and she’ll go back to the hotel. Stella’s going down for the operation first thing in the morning and it’ll be a long one, they won’t know how long until they’re doing it.’

  ‘Can you let me know as soon as you can when it’s over?’

  ‘I will – if I can’t leave her, then I’ll get Ma to ring you.’ I sighed. ‘You feel like my lifeline; talking to you is the only thing keeping me grounded. Stella mentions you all the time, too – and no, before you ask, not just about the gingerbread pigs.’

  He laughed. ‘I’d better make her a princess pig to go into the gingerbread castle we’re going to make when she comes home.’

  ‘I only hope we get a little bit of snow before Christmas too, because she’s convinced there’s going to be some.’

  ‘That’s out of our hands, unless we can hire a snow blower? Do they actually make snow, or just blow it about?’

  ‘I don’t know, but I forbid you to hire one if they do make snow, because it would be way too expensive,’ I told him firmly. ‘By the way how was that Goth croquembouche order you were making?’

  ‘Well, the wedding reception was in a marquee, though it was a bit late in the year. Still, often they’re too humid in summer for the croquembouche, so I suppose that’s better. I decorated the cake with red and black hearts and sugar strands to match the décor in the marquee and I thought it looked weird, but it went down well.’

  ‘I don’t think I’d fancy a Goth croquembouche, but each to their own,’ I said.

  ‘We’ll have to try out that Boston cream pie when you get home, and then you can write it up for your “Cake Diaries”.’

  ‘Yes, I’m hoping to come back with a few new recipes … There’s a lovely nurse – though actually, she said she was some kind of volunteer called a candy-striper – and she’s going to give me her recipe for key lime pie. The receptionist at the hotel’s writing down her grandmother’s Mississippi mud pie recipe too … it all seems to be pies, so far, even when they aren’t actually pies, but cake.’

  I stopped, then asked despairingly, ‘How can I be so interested in cake when my child is about to have a major operation?’

  ‘Because we find comfort where we can,’ he said understandingly. ‘I know the more you talk about cake, the more stressed and worried you are.’

  ‘Cake’s my comfort food of choice – but you seem to be my comfort blanket of choice,’ I confessed. ‘I miss you.’

  ‘I miss you too and I love you both. In fact, I even love your mother,’ he added, which made me laugh despite everything.

  I didn’t want to end the call and I don’t think he did, either, but I had to get back in case Stella woke up.

  I hardly slept at all that night because every instinct of a mother was telling me to scoop Stella up and run away with her; yet my brain accepted that this had to be done. It was the only way she would have a future.

  Jago

  C
ally rang Jago when Stella went down to theatre and then texted him once or twice after that, but then there ensued long hours of agonising silence during which Jago imagined her pacing up and down the waiting area.

  He was fit for nothing except to sit by his phone and wait, but when after what seemed like several lifetimes it rang, it was Martha.

  ‘Jago? Our Cally asked me to call you to tell you that Stella’s back from the operating theatre and she’s sitting in intensive care with her.’

  ‘Did it go … well?’ he asked nervously.

  ‘They said the surgery was a complete success, though of course it’s early days yet and the next twenty-four hours are critical. She’s hooked up to all kinds of machines and still right out of it, poor little thing, though that’s probably all for the best.’

  ‘Thank God she came through it well!’ Jago said devoutly, and he wasn’t ashamed of the tears that pricked at the backs of his eyes.

  ‘That Dr Beems came out afterwards and told Cally and me that unless there are any setbacks, he expects her to make a full recovery, though she’ll need monitoring, of course, as she grows.’

  ‘That’s the best Christmas present anyone could ever give me,’ Jago said, feeling like a chewed rag from an excess of strain and emotion. ‘I’ll pass on the news to Raffy, so he can tell everyone in the village, shall I?’

  ‘Do, and Cally said she’d given you Adam’s parents’ number so you could let them know, too.’

  ‘Yes, I’ll ring them, don’t worry.’

  ‘I’d better go – I want to give Celia and Hal a quick call, but then I need to get back to them. Poor little mite – she does look as if she’s been in the wars.’

  ‘She’s got through it, that’s the main thing,’ Jago said. ‘Now we just all have to will her on to recover quickly.’

  ‘I’ll give Cally your love, shall I?’ she asked slightly drily.

  ‘I hope she knows she’s already got it,’ Jago said. ‘All of it.’