by Lacey Legend
“Mother! I can’t believe it! Thank you so much!” Kelsey stood up, with help of course, from her chair to hug her mother but stopped in mid hug when she saw Alan standing in the doorway.
“Um, hi!” She tried to sound bright and cheerful, but she had a feeling she sounded more confused than anything. There had been plenty of wedding and baby showers that she’d attended in the past, and she knew the groom/father to be showed up toward the end with flowers.
Alan, however, was neither.
So why was he standing there with flowers as if he belonged there?
“I had one last present for you,” he said and started walking into the room. The faces of all of her friends watched eagerly while her mother sat back in her seat and smiled mischievously.
He walked to her at the front of the room with distinct nervousness playing in his walk. In fact, as she watched him walk to her, she realized that she hadn‘t really ever seen him look confident or comfortable with her. Even though she’d been dating him steadily for months, he never seemed to be completely comfortable around her.
But he walked toward her anyway, in a very fine suit that she could tell must be very expensive, and stood in front of her.
“Kelsey, I know we haven‘t known each other long, but I know without a doubt how much my life has gotten brighter and better with you in it. I love you, and I don’t ever want you to be alone.”
Kelsey couldn’t help that she felt completely panicked. He was confessing his love for her right in front of everyone that she knew and she hadn’t even told him yet that she loved him. She wasn’t even sure if she did love him really. He was a nice guy, comfortable to be around, and always very considerate of her. He could even make her laugh sometimes when he let down his guard a bit.
She thought maybe she could love him someday. Or maybe he would grow on her enough. She wasn’t exactly sure, but she did know that she hadn’t figured it out yet and it was slightly scary that he already had. But then her heart nearly stopped with anxiety as he got down on his knee in front of her.
“Kelsey, I want to be your husband and I want to be the father that this little baby deserves. Will you marry me?”
Her stomach dropped immediately and a million thoughts buzzed through her mind. She didn’t even register the excitement that was flying around the room as they all chatted excitedly. It was as if she was floating from above, watching the scene unfold.
She saw Alan on his knee, she was pregnant standing in front of him, her mother running up to give her a hug and check to make sure she approved of the ring. Kelsey wasn’t exactly sure if she’d even answered but suddenly she realized the cool ring with the enormous diamond was placed on her ring finger and everyone was pushing and shoving to get a look and congratulate her.
She looked to Alan who then stood smiling, putting his arm around her shoulders and accepting everyone’s hugs and well wishes. Then she turned to her mother who was also smiling and nodding along as guests congratulated her too. A smile played at her lips, one that she knew she would have to deal with later. It was painted on her face how proud she was, not of her daughter, but of the fact that her plan had worked. What should have been a scandal had turned into a victory for the Roman family and she could see the triumph written all over her face. It became too much and she had to look away.
They had packed the car and returned to her parents’ house and Kelsey felt completely drained from the day. Her eyes stayed trained on the ring, which she had to admit was rather impressive. The fact that she was engaged kept swirling around her mind, she simply couldn’t believe it. It was true that Alan was a good catch for any woman and she was sure that almost all of her girlfriends were envious of her scoring a decent-looking, rich, successful man who treated her like a princess. So why didn’t she feel lucky? Why didn’t she feel anything other than sheer panic?
Maybe it was all just happening so fast, she reasoned. It was only a matter of months before that she’d been feeling bored with her everyday life and now she was pregnant and engaged, and not by the same man. She had to shake away any thought that she was feeling off because of Mason, she couldn’t let that be the case.
Alan was far more suited for her than Mason ever could have been, her mother had been right about that. She had worked so hard for such a long time to move past Mason and the thought of his touch and the burn of his kiss. So why was it that his face was all she could see?
“I think I need to lay down for a bit,” Kelsey announced to her new fiancé.
“Of course sweetheart.” Alan kissed her on the forehead and she had to remind herself she shouldn’t pull away. “You’ve had an exhausting day. Please get some rest and I will arrange a celebration tonight with our families.”
She smiled at him then—she always appreciated his thoughtfulness. Climbing the stairs she felt as if she were filled with wet sand. Her body felt heavy and weighed down. By the time she reached her bedroom, she knew she was about to collapse into a deep nap, but before she slipped into her covers, she saw a letter propped up on her pillow.
Kelsey picked it up and studied the handwriting; it wasn’t writing she recognized. And who sent letters nowadays, anyway? She could only remember ever receiving a handful of letters in her life, and they were usually birthday cards from her grandparents. But this seemed to be a genuine handwritten letter. She sat down heavily and ripped open the envelope letting the letter fall into her hands. Unfolding it, she looked for the name of her mystery writer that she knew would be written at the bottom of the letter.
As soon as she saw the name, she was glad she was sitting. Her heart began to pound and she immediately thought she might be sick. Mason had left her shattered, and, unknown to him, pregnant. And here he was, writing her a letter all these months later. Her hands shook as she tried to read what he had to say.
Kelsey,
I wanted to write you a million times, but I haven’t been able to go through with it. I wanted to apologize for the way I left you, the way I said goodbye. I should have been better about it and I’m sorry if I hurt you. I’m sure you’ve moved on and that you’re happily back in the life you belong in, but I had to confess to you that I think of you all the time. I still can feel you against my skin and miss the way your eyes lit on fire when you got mad at me.
My brother and I are doing well here, as best as we can be considering leaving home the way we did. I hope you’re doing well and are happy. I hope that you can forgive me. I think about you all the time.
Mason
Kelsey sat on her bed reading the letter over and over again. She memorized each word and tried to find any deeper meaning within them. He missed her? She couldn’t believe that. If he missed her so badly, then why had it taken so long for him to reach out to her? Why hadn’t he called her?
She was clouded in confusion, trying to decipher what everything meant. In the beginning she had cried every single night at the knowledge that she’d lost him. But she had forced herself to move forward—she had so much more going on in her life. She was going to be a mother, she was engaged.
Engaged.
That’s right, she was engaged. Her eyes darted quickly from her ring finger to the letter. Anger suddenly surged through her. Who did he think he was, that he could just break her heart and run away, without even looking back, then months later send a letter and make everything better? What exactly was he hoping for? With his attitude and cocky demeanor, he probably expected that she would write him back or come find him or do something to get him back.
No. She wasn’t going to do that, she wasn’t going to chase after someone who ran away and shattered her. She was engaged to a very respectable man and even though it had only been a few hours, she’d given him her word.
He was taking care of her and willing to be a father to her baby girl, and she couldn’t ask for more. Crinkling the letter in her hand, she stuffed it angrily in the drawer of her nightstand. She hoped that she would never have to see his face again.
C
hapter8
Mason groggily woke up to his door being banged upon and a lot of shouting and commotion. He shuffled his way out of his bedroom door and called out to whoever was on the other side that he was coming. It was only seven in the morning and he was hoping Adam would sleep for the extra hour that he had before he had to be taken to daycare.
The banging got worse the longer he took and he felt irritation creep into him just as much as worry did. Whatever was happening on the other side of the door was clearly important, but this was no way to wake someone up so early in the morning. A phone call would have been nice.
When he finally arrived at the door, he didn’t even bother to check the peephole or anything and instead flung the door open just to stop the banging. Two uniformed police officers filled the doorway and Judy stood small behind them.
“Mason Craig?” The larger officer addressed him first, and Mason’s heart began to pound. Police at your door is something that nobody ever wants to wake up to.
“Is something the matter, Officers?” That seemed like such a silly question, why would they be there if there wasn’t something wrong?
“Is your brother Adam with you?”
The second officer was very different than the first. Where the first was tall with and thin, the other was squat and ruddy faced. They looked like something cliché out of a movie, which made sense since the entire town was a little picture from a movie.
“Yes, he is sleeping right now.” A sickening feeling started to worm its way into Mason’s gut and he gripped the handle tighter.
“You’re being charged with kidnapping. You can decide to come peacefully with us and officers will escort you through the drive home, or if you can do this the hard way and we will take other measures.” The ruddy faced officer toyed with the handcuffs that were connected with his belt and Mason understood exactly what he was telling him.
He couldn’t believe it; how had this happened? He had specifically not put a return address on his envelope, so how had she found them? There was no choice, he wasn’t going to cause a scene and make anything worse for Adam than it was about to be.
“Please give me a few minutes to pack things up,” Mason offered.
The taller officer nodded his consent. “We will be waiting downstairs.”
Judy stepped into the apartment as the officers backed off and went down to their car.
“So that’s what you’ve been running from?” she asked him.
Mason rubbed a hand over his face and tried to make sense of everything. He needed to sit down to collect his thoughts, but he knew there wasn’t much time to pack.
“My mother can’t give Adam the life he deserves. My father left and she’s constantly buried in a bottle and doesn’t take care of him at all. I thought if I could take him and start over somewhere new, somewhere that we could actually make a life, I could give him everything he needed.”
He looked up at Judy, unsure of what he was going to see in her eyes. Would she think he was awful, to steal a child from his mother? Would she hate him for lying to her? But instead she was just nodding with understanding in her eyes.
“Let me help you pack,” she offered. He smiled at her. She had been the best help he could have ever gotten and even when everything had fallen apart and he was going to have to go back home, she was still there to help him through it.
She started busying herself in the kitchen and living room while Mason went to pack his clothes. The boys hadn’t accumulated much in their few months, so the packing didn’t take long. As quietly as he could, he packed up Adam, not wanting him to wake to the sight. When he and Judy were finished, they stood in the barren apartment and took it in. There had been such hope for a better life, such happiness.
“How do you think she found me? I didn’t put a return address on the letter.”
Judy turned to look at him and gave a small sigh. “Probably the stamp from the post office, it says the town it was mailed.”
Mason couldn’t help but chuckle. He had wanted to send her money, to try and help, and in the end she not only got the money, but she also found him as well. His act of a good deed was his downfall.
“I’m sorry Judy, for all of this.” Mason hugged her tightly. “You’ve been so great to us. Thank you for everything.”
She patted his back and they pulled apart, but she didn’t back away and held on for a moment longer instead.
“You have a second chance you know,” she said to him.
“I have a second chance with what?” he asked her.
“The girl you left behind. Things don’t happen just for no reason. You ran away from her the first time, and while it was noble to try to take care of your brother, maybe for a change you should take care of you.”
Mason nodded. He knew exactly what she was saying, but what was he to do about it? He was sure when he got back home there would be tons of court problems, and if his mother wasn’t pressing charges, then he’d start the court proceedings to have Adam removed from his mother. If he hadn’t felt worthy of Kelsey when he was with her, and he had screwed up horribly since then, what chance did he have now?
Poor Adam, his sleepy eyes confused again as to why he was being woken up and put in the old rusty truck. Judy came out with bags of food, some milk in a container for Adam, and coffee for Mason. The cops were letting him drive back with Adam because they had an entire life they were taking back with them, but they would be monitored the entire way back home. Mason was glad they weren’t treating him like a criminal and putting him in a squad car so that he could have some time to think.
“You boys take care, you hear?” Judy was giving them both big hugs and buckling little Adam in the seat.
“Don’t worry about tying up loose ends here, I’ll take care of it for you,” she offered Mason.
“I can’t thank you enough Judy.” Mason gave her a bear hug back. She was the best mother he’d ever gotten to experience and he was going to miss her so terribly.
“Keep in touch with us; we’ll miss you.”
Mason nodded and climbed into the truck. He had to get away before he started to cry. Adam couldn’t see how upsetting this situation was, and since he had no idea what was going to happen to him when they got back, he had to keep up a brave face.
The ride back home from their journey was far livelier than the one there where they had driving through the night. With Adam awake he asked all sorts of questions and observed everything excitedly out the window. Where that could have been annoying with everything going on in Mason’s life it actually was the best distraction he could ask for.
The drive back seemed much shorter than the drive there, possibly because this time Mason knew where his destination was going to be, or it could be because he was dreading the arrival so much, but either way it was shocking to him when he arrived at the sign indicating that they were home.
It was an overwhelming sensation that made Mason have to pull off to the side of the road. Wearily he rubbed his eyes and Adam watched him from the back seat.
“Are you excited to see Mom?” Adam asked him. He was getting fidgety and Mason knew that his little body was trying to contain his excitement. It seemed no matter how good he was trying to do, or that he’d even done for Adam, he still wanted to see his mess of a mother.
“Yeah buddy, I’m excited,” he lied with as much enthusiasm as he could manage.
He watched the little boy in the rearview mirror and he saw confusion written across his face and he cocked his head to the side.
“What’s wrong?”
Once again Mason tried to fake it. “Nothing, I’m just tired. It was a long drive. Let’s get you home okay?”
Adam nodded excitedly and bounced a little more. Mason couldn’t help but smile at the boy’s enthusiasm. He had no idea what had happened other than a fun vacation, and he was happy to be home, even though it wasn’t the life he deserved. He had to wonder to himself what Adam would think about what they’d done when he got older. Woul
d he thank him for trying, hate him for failing, or hate him for taking him?
Mason shook the thoughts away. He couldn’t think that far into the future at the moment. He had too many immediate things to take care of. The drive home made him picture what his homecoming would be like, possibly police to finally arrest him or his mother running out to the driveway to scoop up Adam after she’d been anxiously pacing the house awaiting their return. But to his surprise, nothing happened at all. There were no police cars waiting for him and the house looked just as sleepy as when they’d left it.
Adam unclicked his booster seat and jumped out of the truck the moment it was parked. Mason grabbed their bags and hauled their boxes inside their rundown home. Mason hadn’t really realized just how rundown it actually was until it no longer felt like home.
“Mom! Mom! We’re back from vacation!”
He could hear Adam running through the house shouting for his mother, yet he heard no excited shouting from her. Still, he took another deep breath and walked inside, unsure of exactly what he was walking in to.
“Shhh… She’s sleeping in her bedroom.”
Adam checked his watch. It was late in the day to be sleeping still and too early for her to be completely passed out from drinking. He followed Adam up the stairs and unloaded all of their bags before continuing to his mother’s room. He stood in the doorway to her room and saw her lying on the bed—clearly she hadn’t woken up yet from the night before. Time away had made him see how much she’d ruined herself. She resembled a skeleton far too much with her sallow skin and her pale color.
Had she always looked like that or had she become that? He could remember his mother when he was young, vibrant and bright, smiling and twirling in the kitchen, but always with a glass of wine in her hand. Red if he remembered his details correctly. When did her drinks go from socially fun to a sick need?