I sit when I’m finished afraid to go out into the hall. Why would Trina ask me if I am sleeping with Jake when it’s really Dani? Maybe Trina doesn’t know. I stand and wash my mouth out glancing into the mirror. I don’t look so good. Maybe I am sick after all.
Carefully I slip back out into the safety of my car, numb now from everything that has happened. They all played right into my plan with the exception of Jamie and Samantha. If I stay on course, Dani will soon be wishing she never met me but I’m torn at the thought of Jamie. Hopefully my mom will mention Samantha to Michelle and he’ll have a new home soon.
When I pull into the drive to my house I step out of the car and linger for a moment not really wanting to go into the house. Finally my legs traipse across the yard. The white moon shines brightly against the black sky. It casts long shadows across the cool grass. My feet press forward through the dried and brittle undergrowth. I make my way down the small incline to the dock and notice the serene water with barely a ripple. I lower myself to the hard boards, leaning against a cement piling and look up trying to spy any stars. It’s difficult because of the moon’s light but a few sparkle in the depths of the blackness beyond.
Sadness spreads at the thought of the hole I’ve managed to dig. I lower my body to the floorboards as my hands move to cushion my head and my eyelids lower. A few minutes later they pop open at the sound of a car door. Jamie must be home. I sit up to see the tail lights of Sam’s car flash off with the alarm. A figure obscures my view and I realize Jamie is walking towards me. He picks up his pace at the edge of the yard. I push to stand up and my heart starts beating faster. As he gets closer his expression registers a myriad of emotions. The most I’ve ever seen. He looks angry but also worried. Finally he comes within a foot of me and stops. Something else passes over his face, a question. His voice comes out softly, “Beckett, I can’t do this anymore. You make me crazy.”
My eyes widen wondering what he means. Sam’s words pass through my mind… ‘he feels the same about you’. Could he feel the same things that I do? I’m not sure how I feel; actually I’ve been avoiding my feelings for him. If I make him crazy then he probably doesn’t feel the same. I basically schemed to get him removed from my house. But my face flushes and my heart starts pumping faster as he takes a step forward. I can smell his woodsy scent mixed with a flourish of spice which turns my brain to mush.
He leans in slowly, his cheek caressing mine and whispers into my ear, “I want to kiss you Beckett.”
My breathing speeds up at his words and my face shifts slightly allowing his lips to gently touch mine. My eyes close with the light brush. His hands move to tenderly hold my face. He pulls me closer his tongue running fluidly over my lips. My mouth opens as he deepens the kiss. In that moment it is as if we were made for each other. Our mouths move together perfectly as my hands wrap around his neck digging swiftly into his thick hair. His hands move around my back and delicately caress my bare shoulders. In one swift movement he is lowering us to the dock. He sits cradling me in his limbs not breaking our connection.
We kiss gingerly exploring each other with hands and mouths. Finally, when we pull apart for air Jamie states with his green stare piercing my soul, “I have to know something.”
I’m so overwhelmed with my feelings for him that I whisper, “Anything.”
“Why are you telling everyone you’re dating Brett? You aren’t dating him, are you?”
Before I can answer sadness seems to cloud his features. His question slams into me the reality of what I was, am, trying to accomplish. I pull away a little further, sad that he had to ask this question.
“Jamie, it’s really complicated.”
He frowns and attempts to move away, forcing me to move from his lap. My body suddenly misses the warmth. He attempts to stand but I grab his hand and pull him forward.
“Wait Jamie, don’t go. Please let me explain.”
He sinks back down but moves farther away from me, “Fine. I can’t believe you would consider it after what he did to you.”
I look away ashamed but suddenly need him to understand.
“Remember the story of Cassiopeia?”
He nods and states, “The constellation is on your ceiling.”
I smile that he remembers, “It is. Remember she made a sacrifice, Andromeda, her daughter to the sea monster because she had to save her home.”
“Well Brett is my sacrifice. I want back in. Dani has taken everything from me and this is the only way to get it all back.”
He scoots closer to me with compassion across his face. His hand comes up caressing the side of my face, “Why do you care so much Beckett?”
A tear runs down my cheek, “Jamie, it’s been awful. One minute I was at the top and the next I was at the bottom with no one. Just like that star that fell from my ceiling. I don’t want that, not when I know what it’s like at the top.”
His lips gently graze mine as he mutters, “Beckett Chase, what am I going to do with you? You infuriate me but I’m tired of fighting this.”
“Then you shouldn’t.” I lean over and take his face in my hands. This feels so right and so wrong all wrapped up together.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Jamie Grey
Orion – The Hunter
Orion fell in love with the Pleiades, the seven sisters, daughters of Atlas and Pleione. He started pursuing them and Zeus scooped them up and placed them in the sky. Orion can still be seen chasing the sisters across the sky at night.
~*~
Tendrils of light touch my eyelids alerting me that one it’s morning and two I forgot to lower the blinds when I collapsed into bed early this morning. Beckett and I spent half the night under the bright moon splayed out on the dock. She was reluctant to tell me very much about Dani and Brett after I argued with her. So we talked about everything but our current situations.
One thing I am sure about though as I roll over away from the bright light, is that Beckett has gotten under my skin and I don’t think we will be able to go back to the way things were. I’m not sure what that means though. When I tried again and asked her if she was going to continue this thing with Brett she avoided my question and started kissing me again. I’m not sure what to expect today.
I rise out of bed and head for the shower. It washes away the tension momentarily.
When I enter my room again my phone lights up with a text message. I frown at who could be up this early on a Saturday morning. The message is from Sam and it’s frantic begging me to come over as soon as I get up. I have her car anyway which excites me none that I have to return it and possibly run into Elizabeth. But with her message I push my reluctance away and leave my room. As I pass Beckett’s door I hesitate but she is probably still asleep. We came in around four this morning. I would still be sleeping if it weren’t for the sun in my face.
I send a text to Sam before the brief drive over. She is waiting for me on the steps of the small porch when I pull her tiny car into the wide driveway. As she stands I notice that she’s still dressed in pink pajama pants and a white tank top. Her face is scrubbed clean and her platinum locks are piled high on top of her head with wisps snaking out framing her somber expression.
I approach as she takes the last stair. A small tear rolls down her cheek as she stumbles over her words, “I know who it is Jamie. I got a text last night and I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked you to come over here.”
I hold out my hands and pull her into me, “Hey, slow down. You know who what is?”
“I know who Jake is sleeping with.” She pulls out of my arms and covers her face with her hands shaking it from side to side.
I place my hands on her shoulders and firmly ask, “Who is it?”
Her hands drop and a hopeless expression covers her features.
“It’s Beckett. We were wrong. Oh Jamie, I am so sorry.”
I smile and sink to the bottom step. My arms rest on my knees as my eyes drop to Sam’s bare feet. Maybe Beckett is ri
ght to want whatever it is she is trying to prove. These people seem relentless in their pursuits.
She asks unsure, “Jamie? Are you alright?”
I nod and pat the spot next to me for her to sit.
“I have to admit that I thought you’d take this a whole lot different. I guess I’m relieved?” She puts this last part into a question.
My glance shifts to meet her wide brown eyes.
“Sam, I was with Beckett last night. She’s not sleeping with Jake.”
Her mouth drops in shock and she jumps to her feet to start pacing. She stops in front of me ready to respond but continues on the path she is wearing into the gravel underfoot. Finally, she halts looking down at the small pebbles. When she meets my stare a smile spreads.
“You and Beckett?” Her expression is still unbelieving.
I match her smile and nod.
She collapses beside me again, “Wow, Jamie. This is a good thing, right?”
I glance over at her, “Very good.”
“If it’s not her then… Of course, I’m so relieved. Wait what about Brett? Who is sleeping with Jake then? ”
She places her hand to her head and exclaims, “I’m so confused.”
I frown and ask, “Do you have your phone with you?”
She shakes her head and leaps to scurry up the steps while calling out, “I’ll be right back.”
When she returns a moment later she hands me her phone and starts the pacing again.
“Hey can you stop that? You’re making me nervous.”
A finger moves to her mouth to continue the nail biting habit she has always had whenever her nerves take over. I stop scrolling through her phone and look up to find that she didn’t hear me. My feet move into her path. Her eyes look up worried.
“Sam, it’ll all be okay. Come and sit down.”
She relents still chewing on the side of her finger.
The message I was searching for pops up on the screen. It splays the simple words:
Beckett is sleeping with Jake again. You should keep your boy on a shorter leash.
My voice takes on an angry tone, “This is crap. Who sent it?”
She shrugs her shoulders as she pinches a finger between her lips.
I look to find the number but it’s a blocked text. I’m pretty sure Beckett will have an idea of who sent it. The thought of seeing her this morning puts my own nerves on edge. After last night I hope she’ll be different but a tiny part of me is frightened Hyde will reappear.
I rise and hand the phone over.
“I have to go and talk to Beckett. She might know who sent it.” She looks off into the distance as if seeing something across the yard. I follow her gaze but see nothing.
“Hey, don’t worry.”
Sam looks up but she doesn’t seem to be looking at me.
“Sam, did you hear me?”
She seems to shake away her trance. “Oh, yeah. Okay, go and ask Beckett. Can you call me later and tell me what she says?”
I’m about to turn around, but movement at the top of the stairs catches my eye. Elizabeth has just slipped out of the door dressed in jeans and a black T-shirt. Her hair is pulled up into a small clip with fly away hairs framing her face. I never realized how much Sam looks like her until this moment. She mirrors her mom’s wide brown eyes and short nose. My eyes waver when Sam pulls on my hand urging me up the steps. But I can’t control my feet. They won’t move from the spot I’m planted to. Elizabeth’s arms cross her body as the tension vibrates through the air.
Elizabeth shifts her gaze to Sam and her voice comes out carefully, “Sam, I didn’t know you were out here. Is everything alright?”
“Yes, mom, Jamie just brought my car back.”
Sam has dropped my hand and given up. She must notice my reluctance because she asks, “Is breakfast ready?”
“Yes, Sam it’s time to come back into the house.”
Sam turns to me, “Do you want to come in for breakfast?”
I scoot away from the steps as my voice comes out broken up, “No but thank you, I uh, I have to get back. I’m sure they’re waiting for me at home.”
A flush floods Elizabeth’s face and I realize what I said. Quickly I correct myself, “I mean at the Chase house. I have to go.”
I rush through the gravel to the street wishing my feet would move faster. Once I turn the corner out of sight my pace slows down and a text from Sam lights up my phone. It reads:
What the hell was that? Are you okay?
I text her back with a brief response telling her that I just had to be back but that I’ll call her later. That’s twice I’ve seen Elizabeth at Sam’s house. I have to stop going there. The emotion that floods me at seeing her can’t be a good thing.
When I approach the house my feet slow down even more. A part of me doesn’t want to see Beckett for fear of how she’ll react. When we parted last night we didn’t make promises or plans for any future dates. It just happened and that is my biggest fear that it won’t mean as much to her today as it still does to me.
I climb the stone tiled steps and hesitate with my hand on the handle of the door to take a deep breath. When I pull the door and step in my eyes turn up to the staircase snaking its way up to the second floor. Becket is slowly coming down but she pauses when she spots me. She is dressed in jeans that hug her curves perfectly and a peach tank top with ruffles flowing down the front. My lips turn up in a slow smile at the sight of her. She is by far one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen. She continues her descent and stops a foot away from me. Her blue eyes take on a mischievous look as her mouth mirrors my own. She steps forward and leans in placing a finger over my lips as she whispers, “Don’t tell anyone, it’s a secret.” I nod and pull her fingers into my hand raising them to my lips.
She skirts away toward the kitchen and I follow. At this point I would follow her anywhere. She’s bewitched me for sure.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Beckett Chase
Coma Berenices – Berenice’s Hair
Berenice was married to Ptolemy III Euergetes who went on a dangerous mission against the Seleucids, who had killed his sister, in 243 BC, during the Third Syrian War.
Worried for her husband’s life, the queen swore to Aphrodite that she would cut off her beautiful long, blonde hair if the goddess brought Ptolemy back home safely.
~*~
I roll over and as the weariness caused by sleep fades away, I remember last night and the feel of Jamie’s arms around me. I’m pinching myself wondering if it really happened. Quickly pushing myself up to a sitting position I glance around my room and sink back into the pillows smiling with the knowledge that it really did happen. Nothing could wipe this grin from my face but the light shifts and small orbs glint off of the stars above my head. The reality of what I’ve done comes crashing down. Jamie will never want to speak to me again if he finds out. Instead of the elated joy that I felt a moment ago, dread settles over my chest. I don’t deserve him. He’s just too perfect to want someone so evil.
I roll over and wonder if there’s any way if I can take it all back. If only he had revealed how he felt a couple of days sooner… But that was the day that I outed him to Marla. Oh God Beckett, you always screw everything up.
I pull myself out of bed intending to take a shower but my feet move instead to the french doors nestled in the wall of windows. When I step out into the blinding light my eyes shift to his door just the brief span of the length of a room away. The anger I feel at myself prevents me from moving toward them. How in the hell am I going to fix this? The damage is way beyond my control now.
Instead of looking forward to a beautiful day possibly with Jamie if he’d even consider it, I climb back into bed and cocoon myself into the blanket. I’ve just about convinced my body that sleep is a good idea when a soft knock echoes through the room. I wait to see if whoever it is will go away. I’m scared to death that it’s Jamie. I can’t face him right now. Another knock, this time lo
uder and a voice, “Beckett, are you awake?”
Marla. I call out, “Mom, I don’t feel well.”
She opens the door with a soft cooing voice, “Beckett, are you alright? Are you sick?”
I push the blanket off of my face and peek over the edge.
She crosses the space and sits on the edge of the bed. Her hand lifts my hair out of my eyes and feels my forehead. She frowns, “You feel fine. No fever.”
“I’m fine mom. I just want to stay in bed today.”
Her lips quirk as she asks, “Is there a reason that you want to stay in bed today?” Her motherly tone grates on my nerves.
I push the blanket all the way off kicking my legs out from under it and tell her sarcastically, “Okay Marla, are you happy? I’m up.”
She stands her hands smoothing over her skirted blue dress.
“Alright Beckett, whatever it is I’m sure you’ll feel better when you wake up all the way. I’ll see you downstairs at breakfast in a little while. Sasha is making a big spread today.”
Before I can ask what the occasion might be she leaves my room gently closing the door behind her. I look back over at my bed wishful thoughts of sleeping all day taunt me, but Marla will never let that happen. She’d be up here every ten minutes until I get up.
Once I’m showered and dressed I make my way to the staircase. My feet falter at the sight of Jamie below. He has just walked in through the front door. I wonder where he’s been. A deep breath forces air into my chest and I brace myself for his rejection but when my eyes meet his he’s grinning. It takes my breath away that this smile is meant for me. My lips turn up to return his sentiments. I can’t hurt him. I make a quick decision to keep everything from him at least for the moment. I close the distance and walk up to him and place my finger over his lips while telling him, “Don’t tell anyone, it’s a secret.”
The Sound of Shooting Stars Page 14