His smile seems to widen and he pulls my whole hand to his lips. My heart stops at that moment gazing into the clear green of his eyes that only see me right now. My stomach flips with nerves causing me to back up and walk to the kitchen. He follows closely behind and almost runs into me when I pause at the entrance to the dining room shocked to find Michelle, his case worker, sitting casually with Marla and David.
All three sets of eyes look up. Marla is the first to speak, “Well, we were wondering when you two would join us. Come on then have a seat before the food gets cold.”
She calls out, “Sasha, they are finally here.”
I swiftly move to a seat across from David and look to find Jamie still standing in the doorway. His stare is set on Michelle. I look over at her to find a sort of sympathetic expression on her face. Jamie finally comes forward leaving a chair between us. My middle clenches at this very small implication but then I remind myself that I was the one who just told him to keep it a secret. As Sasha brings the food in Jamie’s expression falters and he looks over at me. It looks as though he is injured somehow but he mouths, ‘I’m sorry’ to me. I look away worried and confused but my eyes land on Michelle’s. She looks away and starts to make small talk with Marla as the bowls of food are passed around the table. I forgo each bowl as it passes me by. My appetite is gone.
Marla pipes up after a sip of coffee, “Michelle, it’s so good of you to join us for breakfast but I have to admit that I was a little surprised at your call this morning and your hurry to come over.”
Michelle sets her fork down beside the plate in front of her and looks over to Jamie and then to David before she explains, “Actually, I wanted to make it over here sooner but this was the best time I could find. I’m here on official business, not to see how Jamie is doing. Unfortunately it’s come to my attention that he has had contact with a, um, a previous foster placement.”
My hand moves to my mouth in shock as to what she is saying hits me. Sam. No, she can’t take him away. I look over at Jamie terrified that what is running through my head is actually happening but his expression mirrors mine exactly. It’s all my fault. If I hadn’t told Marla, this wouldn’t be happening. I should have told him last night. I’m such a horrible person.
Michelle continues as if she didn’t just see our exchange but I know she saw it all.
“You see some of the rules state that if a foster child has difficulty at a current placement, he needs to be removed and placed in a new setting. It’s in his best interest.”
I leap out of my chair causing it to topple backward, “But Jamie hasn’t had any problems. He, he likes it here. You can’t take him away.”
Marla looks appalled at my outburst but a small smile splays over Michelle’s lips. She quickly regains her composure as Marla coaxes me back into the chair. Marla berates, “Really Beckett, what has come over you?”
I glare at Michelle as she points out speaking only to me it seems, “I know he hasn’t had any problems and I’m aware that he likes it here. You see the problem isn’t here per say… ” Her voice trails off.
For the first time since entering the room Jamie speaks, “It’s Elizabeth, isn’t it?”
I’m not sure what is happening. What? Who is Elizabeth? I know Michelle is here because I opened my big ass mouth.
Michelle’s expression answers his question but she quips, “I can’t answer that exactly but I can tell you that normally Jamie having contact with any other family that he’s been placed with wouldn’t mean anything. Except that he had such a long placement with one particular family and they had started the adoption process but halted it.”
Jamie’s lips spread in a tight line. I can see the pulse at his temple beating with his anger.
I turn back to Michelle and ask, “When?”
At this question she looks to David and he takes over the conversation.
“Beckett, Jamie, at this moment forth, you are to have nothing to do with Samantha Jamison. I am trying to find a loop hole to keep Jamie with us. So it is imperative that you do not speak to her or even look at her. And I shouldn’t have to say this but don’t go near the Rivers’ house.”
My heart falls at my dad’s orders. There is no way Jamie will be able to stay away from Samantha. She is his best friend. I’ve never had one, well I thought Dani and Trina were close enough but I’ve never had what Jamie has with Sam. I look over at him and reach under the table to his hand but he doesn’t return my gesture. Instead he rises up and asks looking down at Michelle with hurt and anger, “Can I be excused?” All three adults nod.
He turns and leaves. A moment later the front door slams closed. I want so badly to follow him out but I regretted the last time I ran from the room without getting all of the details.
I place my hands on the table to show more strength than I know I have and turn to David and ask, “Is there really a chance Dad, that he can be removed? Can you really find a loop hole?”
He lowers his glasses to the table and nods, “Yes, Beckett, but he must stay away from Samantha. I understand that they have a lot of history but if he doesn’t stay away, Michelle will have to remove him immediately.”
I look over to Michelle and ask, “But why does it matter whether he has contact with a previous placement?”
My dad answers for her, “Beckett, Jared Rivers, Samantha’s step-father has a lot of influence in this county. His development company is regarded as a major contributor to many of the renovations throughout Palm Beach especially. I think Jamie’s situation is unique. His pull in the county can get things done that normally wouldn’t happen.”
Michelle looks down suddenly making her look helpless. I guess in this case, she is pretty helpless.
I blurt out, ”How long does he have if my dad doesn’t find something?”
She looks up apprehensively, “I’d say a week. I won’t be able to stall any longer.”
I sigh as Marla grasps my hand. She smiles warmly and encourages, “Why don’t you go and find him Beckett.”
I lift out of my chair and turn to the doorway but spin back and look at Michelle noticing her steel grey eyes for the first time, “Thank you.”
She nods. I quickly make my way out the door and spot him sitting on the end of the dock looking into the bleak water below. The sky has turned grey with a threat of rain in the distance. Slowly I gather the strength I’ll need for Jamie. The strength I thought I’d need to stand up to Dani but in the face of losing Jamie when I just found him, Dani means nothing.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Jamie Grey
Aquila – the Eagle
The eagle is found guarding the arrow of Eros, which hit Zeus and made him love-struck.
~*~
I still can’t believe this crap that is happening and I have no control over it. I was sure Elizabeth was sorry for sending me away all those years ago. I completely misread her reaction to seeing me again. I feel like I’m losing Steve all over again. This time it’s his daughter and that seems so much worse. Finding Sam brought light back into my life. She’s made everything so much easier to deal with. I don’t think I will be able to exist without her again.
“Jamie?” Beckett’s soft voice calls out behind me.
I don’t answer her. Her footsteps echo through the wooden planks underfoot.
She’s closer, “Jamie, can I sit?”
I look over to find her standing near looking down at me with a questioning expression.
I nod and glance back out to the water. My feet dangle over the waveless liquid. She settles beside me and grabs my hand squeezing it. I take a deep breath and admit, “I can’t stay away from Sam.”
The tone of her voice is strangled, “I know.”
“Sam wouldn’t want this. It’s her mother.”
“I know.”
I look over at her sympathetic expression and ask, “How long did Michelle say I have before I have to leave?”
“A week if my dad can’t find a way for you to stay
. But Jamie, my dad is a good lawyer. He’ll find a way.”
I nod not really believing her. This has been the way things have played out my entire life. Why should I expect anything different the last nine months until I gain my freedom? My heart is breaking that Elizabeth, the only person who could have been a mother to me, would do this.
My hand absently squeezes Beckett’s as my blood starts to boil with anger. I have to tell Sam. Maybe she can talk some sense into her mother. Just when the stars start to shine brighter a black cloud blocks them making things unattainable.
Beckett mumbles, “Ah Jamie, my hand.”
I break the connection and quickly rise to my feet, “Sorry. I have to go.”
I turn on my heel and walk briskly off the dock shoving my hands into my pockets. I hear Beckett call out but my pace quickens. She runs up pulling gently on my arm and pleads, “Jamie you can’t go over there. Michelle will take you away from me.”
She stops, her hand leaving my arm and starts crying. Her erratic breathing halts my progress. I look up at the huge shadowed house in front of me and turn back to find her sunken to the ground on her knees. Her face is in her hands with soft whimpering filling the silence. I step over to her and sink to my knees in front of her. My hands pull at her wrists revealing that beautiful face streaked with tears. The freckles dotting her nose are more pronounced with the flush of her face. I move closer as I look into her eyes and ask, “What am I supposed to do? I don’t know anymore.”
She wipes her cheeks and grasps my face, “I don’t know but please don’t go over there. Please just wait.”
“What about Sam? She needs to know.”
Her words come out frantic, “I can go over there. I’ll tell her. I can’t lose you when I just found you.”
I stare into her blue eyes brimming with tears and realize that whatever this connection between us is, I can’t lose it. I don’t want to lose Beckett. I close the distance my lips crushing into hers. This kiss is more fierce and desperate than last night. Her hands weave into the hair at the nape of my neck. A few warm rain drops trickle onto our faces. Beckett leans back to look up at the sky. Her lashes catch tiny droplets in them like a spider web snatching its prey. I watch in awe of her as she blinks them away. A moment later the sky opens up dropping buckets on us drenching our hair and clothes instantly. Beckett looks up into my eyes blinking rapidly through the rain. I see so much fear and all I want to do is comfort her and take it away but I can’t, not when I feel the same. Instead I grab her hand and pull her to her feet. We run up the incline and cross the porch to the overhang. Beckett pulls on my hand forcing me to face her again. She brushes my hair back tenderly and tells me, “I will go and tell Sam as long as you promise to stay away from her, at least for a little while.”
It pains me to hear her words but I nod in agreement. As much as I need to see Sam, I need Beckett too.
We trek into the kitchen to find Sasha prepping food for dinner. She turns to us and warns, “Take your shoes off at the door. I don’t want to have to clean up after you two.”
We oblige but she calls out to us before we leave the room.
“I would also advise you to keep this thing,” She gestures between Beckett and I, “under wraps. You all have enough to deal with without adding more fuel to the fire.”
Beckett brushes her off, “Oh Sasha it’s nothing.”
She shakes her head and turns away. I understand her implication. The last thing I need is Marla kicking me out for taking advantage of her daughter.
I drop Beckett’s hand and whisper into her ear, “Sasha is right, one thing at a time.”
She nods and turns to me, pain and fear still plastered across her face, “Do you promise to stay away Jamie?”
I try to assure her with a small smile and a slight nod. I know I’ve failed miserably though. Her hand darts to my cheek before she turns to leave the room. I watch her go and marvel that within the span of less than a day, my life has once again taken a drastic change. This time though, I intend on controlling the outcome. I won’t stand idly by and lose the two most important people to me,Sam, who I finally have back and Beckett, a new reason for waking up every day.
Chapter Thirty
Beckett Chase
Draco – The Dragon
The golden apple tree was a wedding present to Hera when she married Zeus. She planted the tree in her garden on Mount Atlas and tasked Atlas’ daughters, the Hesperides, with guarding it. She also placed the dragon Ladon around the tree so that the Hesperides would not pick any apples from it.
~*~
If someone would have told me a week ago that within seven days I would be both reveling at what I had found and terrified at what I could lose, I would have laughed. Now though, I’d give almost anything to go back to the feeling of loss I endured last week. If only to forgo this terror that has burrowed into the pit of my stomach. The fear of losing Jamie tops anything else that could possibly happen. But here we are with a bleak outlook as to whether he will remain living here. And all because some tight-assed bitch has too much time on her hands and some sort of vendetta against Jamie.
The hot water pouring down on my pruned body does nothing to ease the tension. In truth it fuels my anger at Samantha’s mom. Where in the hell does she get off dictating where someone can live? I step out of the shower when the water starts to turn cool and wrap an oversized pink towel around me. As I pass the vanity my reflection catches my attention causing me to turn and face the dark deep purple lining the area beneath my eyes. The usual bright blue of my eyes seems to have dulled and my skin is pink from the hot water. What does he see in me? I’ve been evil to a lot of people in the past year. And this past week…my hand runs though the damp hair on my head as I stare at the image of the person I don’t really know anymore. The girl I’ve become and the girl I want to be, they aren’t the same.
The phone call and emails I sent flash through my memory. I should have let things stay the way they were. I know that I’m using this thing with Jamie as an excuse for why I’m going to lose him when I’ve just gotten a tiny bit of happiness. It won’t be because of Michelle or Samantha’s mom, when he finds out what I did, it will be his choosing not to want anything to do with me. I turn from the girl in the mirror. She looks innocent and I am far from blameless.
After I dress in Jeans and a purple t-shirt, I climb back down the stairs. The house is eerily quiet. I struggle with the idea of going to find Jamie but decide against it.
My feet splash through the puddles on the way to my car. It was probably pointless to take a shower but at least my skin is scrubbed clean. I still feel filthy for what I’ve done. It’s time to come all the way clean.
The car inches through the opened gates into the circular drive of Samantha’s broad white trimmed house that looms in front of me as it taunts me with the lies I’ve told. The day I met Samantha pops into my head. Her family had just moved into the impressive two story bungalow . I was on my way to the beach. It was a mile long walk but I loved the way the water felt on those hot summer days. There was never anything quite as refreshing as swimming in the cool saltwater. Even the intercoastal behind my house couldn’t compare. I was walking along the sidewalk and saw the huge moving truck backed snuggly into the drive. I stopped and gripped the warm slatted bars that surrounded the property. Samantha just happened to be walking out of the house at that moment. She must have felt my stare and looked up to see me watching her family move in. Her platinum blonde hair bounced in the sun as she skipped to stand in front of me on the other side of the gate. I decided that day that she didn’t have a mean bone in her body. She invited me up to her room and we hung out for years after that. The summer after tenth grade things changed. I found Dani and quickly Samantha wasn’t important anymore.
I take a deep breath and ready myself for what I have to do. I still believe Samantha is incapable of anything evil but if there were ever a time for it, today would be that day. I’ll be the brunt of all of it I
’m sure and I deserve every bit of her fury.
My feet slowly climb up the wet steps of the porch. The rain has stopped but the sky has turned darker as if predicting looming events.
My finger gingerly presses the button to alert them that I’m here. Dread spreads to my limbs creating a numbing feeling. A minute passes before the handle turns and the door swings inward. A tall thin woman with shoulder length platinum hair answers the door. Her wide brown eyes match her daughters. Recognition crosses her face and a shadow follows. Her voice seems forced, “Beckett, I’m surprised to see you here. What can I do for you?”
“I need to see Samantha. Is she here?” Her red mini is sitting in the driveway a span of ten feet away. I watch as her mom hesitates but she relents finally opening the door wider. She asks, “Do you need help finding your way?”
I shake my head and look to the floor ashamed because I’ve been a terrible person to this woman’s daughter. How do you face someone who knows how horrible you are? I walk to the staircase and slowly make my way up to Samantha’s bedroom door. I raise my hand and knock gently. A soft muffled voice calls out, “Come in.”
Slowly I push the door open and meet Samantha’s surprised look as I stand in the entrance to her room. It’s decorated differently than the last time I was here. When we were in middle school she loved purple. Everything in the room was a varied shade of the color. Now though, it’s neutral in beiges and very light teals.
“Beckett, I wasn’t… wow, what brings you over here?”
I shift on my feet and ask, “Can I come in?”
She nods and moves to the side of her bed to sit down. I fall onto the edge of a tan chair situated in the corner of the room. The back of it almost disguised with piles of clothes. My hands clasp and unclasp nervously for a few beats before I decide to blurt out, “Jamie might have to leave again.”
She smiles for a minute but then what I’ve said seems to register and she frowns.
“What? I thought you were going to tell me…Why does Jamie have to leave?”
The Sound of Shooting Stars Page 15