Lilith

by Ashley Jeffery

  Soft Voices

  My dad grabbed my arm before I could exit the car. "Wait for the officer."

  His eyes motioned towards Lexie and I rolled my own. Right like she would actually attack me in the light of day in front of him, and the officer that was parked next to us. Yea she might be a bitch, but she wasn't stupid.

  "Dad it's fine, we don't even know if it was her. And honestly, I'm not so sure it was her anyway." I reached for the door handle and exited the car.

  Lexie came forward and reached for my bag. "Thought you might need some help."

  I chewed on my bottom lip in confusion, okay I was definitely not expecting that.

  "Uh, sure, wait why?"

  She sighed and came closer, I took a step back in defense. "Look I didn't do that to you Pacey, and I can prove it. I was in Hawaii this weekend, visiting my Nana. She's my favorite person. I wouldn't do that.” She pointed to my injuries.

  “I...I wanted to thank you, no one's ever stood up to me, not really you know. Even Rhiannon didn't stand there and say, what I'm positive was something I needed to hear. She just did a lot of name calling." She grabbed my backpack and put it on her empty shoulder.

  "Honestly Lexie I don't know what to say."

  She grinned. "No I get it, Rhiannon's on her way over. I'd carry this for you all day, but I think she might just kill me."

  Lexie handed me back my bag and turned to walk away. Before she'd gone very far she turned around again.

  "I'd really like to be your friend."

  My jaw dropped. What was she playing at? I watched Rhiannon walk forward and bump into Lexie on purpose. Lexie fell backwards on to her butt. People gathered around her and laughed. All of the sudden Lexie Vega wasn't little Miss Popularity anymore. She stood up and dusted off her hands, I watched her glance over her shoulder at me and smirk. Rhiannon gave her another dirty look before she walked away.

  "Why were you talking to trashy pants?" Rhiannon's voice was high and annoyed.

  I really missed my old friend, the one that didn't jump to conclusions, or talk bad about people all the time. I stared into her heavily lined blue eyes and shook my head.

  "Why does it really matter Rhi? I didn't think we were talking yet anyway."

  Rhiannon's eyes narrowed. "What crawled up your ass and made you become such a bitch to me?"

  Luckily, I saw Dean breaking through the crowd that had earlier been laughing at Lexie.

  "You know what, I'm starting to think you’re just as bad as she is now Rhiannon, worse actually, because she was never nice, but you were, and now it seems like you're trading places."

  "I've been your best friend for how long and that’s how you're going to talk to me. You better be careful Pacey, or I'll---"

  I interrupted her tantrum. "You'll what, spread rumors, or make some stupid plan to take me down. Give it a rest, is this really, how you want to spend the rest of our senior year. Obsessing over Lexie and being such a bitch, your best friend doesn't want to hang out with you anymore. God Rhi, I almost died, and all you care about is your vengeance. Your ridiculous obsession."

  By the time I was done speaking Dean was at my side. I didn't know what was wrong with me. Ever since Dean moved here I'd changed, or maybe I hadn't, maybe I'd just gotten sick of being Rhiannon's Bad Girl Sidekick. I never really wanted anything to do with her plan anyway.

  Maybe now, for once, I was saying what I really felt, instead of siding with Rhi. Rhiannon's face flashed red and she walked forward and slapped my face hard. I could feel the sting the moment her hand connected with my face.

  "What was that for Rhiannon?" Dean moved forward to shield me from any other blows.

  The officer that had been trailing me grabbed Rhiannon's arm harshly.

  "I'll be walking her to the Principals office. Will you be okay Miss O’Brien?" The officer asked.

  “Sure.” I said and watched him drag Rhiannon away.

  She was smiling at me smugly, evilly, and I thought I saw something black flash in her eyes. Where had my old Rhiannon gone to, I missed my best friend.

  "What was that all about?" Dean asked as he pulled my backpack from my hands.

  "I don't know we're just not getting along so well these days." I said.

  I could hear Rhiannon uttering under her breath. "Just wait Pacey; I'm not even close to being done with you yet."

  I stopped walking and stood glued to the spot. What did that mean? Dean tried to pull me forward but I shook my head.

  "I can't, something’s wrong. I can feel it." My heart started beating rapidly, and the air around me started to howl.

  I covered my ears with my hands and fell to my knees. I could hear everyone’s voices in my head. All of them whispering my name over and over again. Pacey, Pacey, PACEY, Pacey, and then a voice I'd never heard before broke through all of the others.

  "I know you can hear me Pacey, I'm not done with you yet." And she laughed, over and over again. Her high-pitched chuckle vibrating in my head. And I blacked out, for the hundredth time it seemed.

  When I woke up I was in what I assumed was the nurses office at school. My head was pounding, I placed my fingers on my temples and tried to ease the crushing feeling. What was happening to me. I could hear someone in the other room muttering. I sat up in my chair and tried to listen.

  “That poor girl, I'm sure she's had a horrible week. I'll have to go check on her in another hour.” The woman sighed and continued.

  “I should probably call home for her; did I forget to turn off the coffee maker again?”

  Her voice turned into whispers, rolling out so quickly it hurt my head to keep up. Did anyone actually talk to themselves like that? It was kind of creepy. I laid back down when I heard the door open.

  "Pacey?' The older woman poked her head around the door and looked inside.

  "Yea," I said.

  “Whew I'm glad she's awake now, I need to get home and check that coffee maker.”

  "Excuse me?" I asked in confusion.

  "I'm sorry did you not want to be disturbed?" She said.

  “She's a little cranky, you'd think she'd be grateful to know someone was taking care of her.”

  "I am." I said.

  She walked farther into the room with a muddled expression on her face.

  "Am what sweetheart." She asked.

  "Grateful."

  Her eyes widened. “Did I say that out loud, oh God, no, I pray she won't tell Mrs. Charleston. My daughter already thinks I'm senile.”

  "Yes you did say that out loud, I'm sorry if I seemed rude. It's been a pretty weird day."

  The nurse jumped back in fear and headed for the door. “I know I didn't say that out loud, oh my God is she reading my mind, no, no, that's not possible, I am senile. There's no way she can read minds, but if she is she knows what I'm thinking right now too.”

  "I-I-I I think it would be a g-good idea for me to ca-call your parents." She slammed the door and locked me inside.

  I sat up and stared at the door. Great, now I was trapped, and what had just happened. Had I really read her mind, or was she just senile, like her daughter kept telling her.

  When my parents arrived, my mom was frantic. She wanted to drive me to the emergency room immediately. I tried not to hear what they were thinking but the voices kept coming and coming. It was worse when there were lots of people in the room. I couldn't tell what was being spoken and what was being thought. It was horrible. I begged my parents to take me home, and promised my mom I'd stay home till Monday.

  I didn't regret my promise. Whatever was happening to me scared me enough to make me wanna stay home. And the voices, the voices came from everywhere all the time. I could even hear them when I was trying to sleep, whispering inside my head their deepest thoughts, and desires.

  I ran my fingers across the flat raised lines. It really did look horrible. The first scar ran from the middle of the back of my neck over my shoulder and to my collarbone. The second one was just above it shorter and parallel
to the first but jagged instead of straight. The third was the ugliest, it was like someone had tried to saw my skin off completely a crescent shape that ran from the middle of my shoulder all the way up and over to the middle of my chest.

  I groaned. The nurse hadn't lied when she said no more tank tops, the last scar ran down my shoulder into my armpit. I moved my arm and watched the scars tug unnaturally at my skin. I grunted and pulled my Deftones shirt back on.

  The charcoal cloth covered most of my scar. The only one visible was the second one that ran the farthest up my neck. All of the scars combined made it look like someone had tried to remove my shoulder. I shivered and made my way downstairs.

  Dean was sitting in the living room waiting. We weren't allowed to leave, but mom had said as long as we left the door "open" to my room he could watch a movie with me inside. My dad was out in the garage working on his latest contraption.

  I hadn't asked him to make what Rhiannon wanted. No, I was out of that whole ordeal. Even if Lexie had been mean to me on Thursday, and she wasn't, I didn't want to be involved. It just wasn't in me.

  "Hey Pace, you ready?" Dean turned and noticed my presence in the room.

  "Yea, we can grab some junk food and head on up." Dean followed me into the kitchen mom was already in there making us up a tray of food.

  "Awesome thanks mom." She smiled and handed Dean the tray.

  "Remember keep the door open...Dean." His face turned a little red.

  “He's lucky she likes him so much, if it weren't for that I'd drag him out by the ear.”

  I closed my eyes and concentrated. If I tried to clear my head and block it out, I could get control of the voices. Her voice faded from my head and I opened my eyes.

  "You're the best mom." I kissed her on the cheek and led Dean out of the room.

  He'd brought over a couple of scary movies to watch. We sat on the floor with pillows behind us and the food tray on top of the bed. Dean put his arm around me and pulled me closer gently.

  "How's your shoulder feeling?"

  I looked over into his worried eyes and tried not to think about what he might be thinking.

  "It's ok." I could hear my mom's feet coming up the stairs.

  "Hey Pacey, one of the girls at work called and there's an emergency. I have to run in. If your dad ever comes up for air tell him I'm gone okay." She stood in the doorway for a minute staring at us.

  "Behave. Dads still here remember!" She smiled stiffly and walked back downstairs I could hear her muttering to herself.

  “I know this is a bad idea I can feel it, if that boy tries anything with her I'll remove his favorite appendage. Damn crazy customers.” Her inner voice trailed off when the front door slammed.

  "So we're alone now I guess." Dean smiled brightly.

  Oh no. What was he thinking. I stared into his eyes and waited for the voices to come. “I should tell her...no, it's too soon, I can't, I don't deserve her. Damn it.”

  My eyebrow went up in surprise. What in the heck was he talking about.

  "What do you want to do now?" Dean's voice was strained, I could feel the tension start to rise between us.

  "Let's watch a movie." He turned to watch the screen.

  I reached for his other hand. He held my fingers against his upper thigh. The butterflies in my stomach immediately erupted. Was he going to try anything?

  “Just kiss her stupid.”

  I almost laughed when the words echoed inside my head. He reached up with the hand that had been holding my fingers and brushed my cheek, turning my face towards his.

  "Pacey, " He said.

  I moaned a little in response.

  "I love you." His voice was just above a whisper.

  I watched his face contort in different emotions, from excitement, to sorrow and fear. Had he really just said that.

  "Wow Dean really." I didn't know what else to say, it was stupid, that's not how you should react when someone tells you they love you.

  "I-I love you too.”

  He smiled and pressed his forehead to mine. I could feel my pulse start to beat faster. Wow...Love. He turned more towards me and pressed his lips to mine. The heat exploded the moment our lips met. In seconds we were up and standing. Dean was pressing my back against the bed and crawling on top of me. His hands were in my hair and running down the sides of my body.

  The tray of food crashed to the floor. His hand reached under my shirt and rubbed my bare stomach. A small moan escaped my lips and he broke the kiss. I stared up into his intense face and caught my breath. One solitary tear was running down his cheek.

  "What's wrong?" I said.

  Dean rolled off of me onto his back and covered his face with his arm. "I have to tell you something, something...bad."

  I sat up and stared down at him. "Great, that sounds awesome."

  He groaned and uncovered his face. He pushed himself up with his elbows. "You know how I told you I moved because of my dad dying."

  I nodded and watched his eyes glaze over.

  "That was only part of the reason. We also left because someone I loved, other than my dad...she....she..."

  I waited for those few moments in dread, I just knew his ex was stalking him or something crazy like that damn it. I could tell he wasn't being truthful about his ex when we'd talked about it weeks ago. Damn, damn, damn.

  "Pacey, my girlfriend she was killed. That's why I didn't want to talk about it. Dad died a long time before we moved almost two years ago; it was Tess's death that drove us away. Tess's death." He closed his eyes and laid back down throwing his arm back over his face.

  "I'm sorry, do you hate me?" He said.

  I reached for his arm but couldn't move it.

  "No Dean I don't hate you, but why didn’t you just tell me?"

  He sat up and looked me in the eyes. "I don’t know. But I’m worried whoever killed Tess might have tried to hurt you."

  I fought the chill that crept up my spine. Was this all because of Dean, was someone after him? I denied the rightness I felt settle in my belly. It wasn’t his fault it couldn’t be.

  "I don't know Dean why would someone kill her and try to kill me…” But even as I tried to deny it, I could feel it was true.

  Dean shrugged. "I don't really know, it’s just weird right."

  "I guess." Denial. I mulled it over in my mind trying to figure out how the pieces fit together. Why would someone be stalking Dean?

  “I mean were you ever contacted like by a stalker or something?” I crossed my fingers hoping to God he said no.

  Dean chewed on his cheek, shaking his head. "No it's just, well come on, it can't be a coincidence."

  I took a deep breath of relief.

  "Well if no one contacted you then it’s not the same at all. It’s more like I have a crazy stalker than you do. When your girlfriend died how'd it happen?"

  "She was run off the road, her car flipped a bunch of times, and she died on impact. Why?"

  I smiled a little maybe I wasn’t in denial, coincidences happened all the time, and they didn’t always mean something. DENIAL. I ignored the inner voice.

  "Dean, seriously, this can't be connected. I was attacked by...something, and I'm the one that keeps getting crazy messages."

  We both jumped when my phone rang. I stared at the familiar number and smiled. Thank God, I needed the distraction.

  "Just a sec ok, we'll finish in a minute." Liar. I opened my phone and smiled into the receiver.

  "Of all the crazy ex-boyfriends in the world you just had to be mine." I heard Weston laugh into the phone.

  "Pacey O’Brien, how's your cute little ass doing?"

  I eyed Dean and cleared my throat. "Pretty effing bad actually. I've been getting crazy stalker texts and then last week someone tried to kill me."

  I heard Weston laugh he thought I was joking. "Only you babe, only you."

  "I'm serious Wes."

  He stopped laughing. "No shit?"

  "Yea."

  "Wow." />
  "Yea."

  "Ahh man, I was just calling to see what the plans were for your birthday. I thought for sure Rhi would have some crazy bash planned."

  I sighed in regret, he was right, Rhi probably did. "Yea Rhi isn't talking to me so much just now, but no I don't know what the plans are."

  I glanced at Dean's narrowed eyes and continued. "Oh I also have a new boy-friend,"

  I looked into Dean's face and watched him smile, whew okay so at least I was right about that.

  "So he just might take me out I guess. You planning on coming into town?"

  Wes chuckled. "Duh, so you have a new boyfriend. I hope he's at least half as cool as the last one. Word is he was quite the ladies man."

  I laughed. "Right, ladies huh, like your mom and grandma."

  "Hey man, come on don't be harsh."

  "Whatever Wes, but Dean's great…awesome, and so much better at kissing he could give you lessons."

  Wes groaned. "You're just mean. Ok so I guess I'll call when I'm in town I'll probably be there the day before so we can catch up, and I can meet this idiot Dean."

  "Sounds good."

  "Alright P, I'll talk to you later."

  "Ok bye Wes." I hung up the phone grinning and stopped when I looked at Dean.

  "Was that an ex-boyfriend?" He asked.

  I cleared my throat. "Yea but well we were better friends than lovers you know."

  I closed my eyes when I realized I'd said lovers. No guy wants to hear that come out of his girlfriend’s mouth.

  "Really?" Dean sat up and moved closer towards me.

  "Well yea we've been friends since grade school. We decided we might as well try the dating thing but it just wasn't right."

  Dean searched my eyes. I hoped it didn't piss him off. Wes was always going to be in my life, even if it was from a distance.

  "Ok."

  I stared at Dean's serious face and punched him in the arm.

  "Hey what was that for?"

  "For thinking I'd actually do that to you."

  "Do what to me?" His voice dropped an octave. He was grinning shamelessly.

  "Uh nothing now." I crossed my arms and stared back at him. He growled and pushed me down.

  "Nothing huh...you sure about that?"

  My breath caught in my throat. He was laying on top of me again. I sighed and pulled his face down to mine. I could hear the door open and close from downstairs. My eyes flashed open and I pushed Dean away.