“He didn’t think I was a coward?”
Mom let out a sharp sound of dismay. “Jenna Mae Murphy, how can you say such a thing? You suffered the loss of innocence. Your father knew what that was like. His parents died in a fire while he was in college. He worked three jobs to finish his degree and saw classmates who didn’t have his grades get the best jobs because of their connections. He nursed that grudge for a long time. Until he met me, actually. You and your dad were a lot alike, but you have my Molly Brown attitude, too, girlfriend, and don’t you forget it.”
Jenny chuckled at her stern tone. “O-o-kay.”
They traveled in silence for a few miles, Jenna digesting the information about her father. She’d heard the tragic story of her grandparents’ deaths but had never really thought about how that might have impacted her father—a young man who suddenly found the course of his life altered forever. He’d needed to help provide for his younger sister, who was in high school at the time. She’d gone to live with relatives in Montana. When Jenna stayed with her after the rape, her aunt had told her that Clarence had continued to send money every month, urging her to go to college so she could be independent and would never have to feel like a burden.
Education. His answer for everything. No wonder Dad pushed me so hard to go back to school. And she’d let one miserable excuse for a human being take that from her.
“Mom, how come Shane isn’t going with you? Doesn’t the director need to be present for screen tests?”
Bess repositioned the printed copy of her electronic ticket in her oversize purse between her Sudoku book and the copy of the script Jenna had given her. “I got the impression he was staying here to finish up the scripts. He said something about slipstreams or video conferences…I don’t know. I wasn’t really paying attention. There are times when I think I’m in the middle of a dream. What would your father say?”
Jenna stopped at the light. She turned and eyed the woman who looked ten years younger than she had a week ago. If nothing came of this, Jenna would still be grateful to Shane for giving Mom a chance to realize her dream. “Dad would be pouting because you were leaving, but the minute you got on the plane, he’d start telling everyone how wonderful you were going to do. The next Doris Day or something.”
“Doris Day? Oh, dear. I hope not. She was a little before my time. How ’bout Meryl Streep?”
“Works for me.”
As they neared the turn for the airport, her mother said, “Are you going to tell me what happened last night between you and Shane before I leave, or am I going to have to worry all the way to L.A.?”
“We drove to the lake and talked. I…I don’t think we’re going to work together anymore.”
Bess inhaled sharply. “You can’t be serious.”
“Mom, it was inevitable. It’s not like we have a future together. His life is on the West Coast. He’s only here for a few more days at most. Even if you win the part, can you see us moving to California?”
“Yes.”
“Really?”
Her mom waited until Jenna pulled into a parking place before saying, “Jenna Mae, please tell me you’re not going to do this again.”
“Do what?”
“Let your past muck up your future. I’ve seen the sparks between you two. And one thing I know about a Bernese mountain dog, they bond for life.”
Jenna couldn’t help but chuckle, despite the intensity of her mother’s tone. “Shane is a great guy, Mom. And he’d make a wonderful dog, but I’m not ready to be a pet owner.”
Bess closed her eyes and sighed. “Honey, you know I’m talking metaphorically. He’s genuine, deep and real. Give him a chance to prove it.”
Tears filled her eyes. “I tried, Mom. But…it’s complicated.”
Bess hugged her. “Life is, honey. Start to finish. Just don’t let your fears keep you from playing.” She smiled. “I’d better go before I start channeling my character. Aggie would tell you that the right dog can mean the difference between a night of peaceful sleep with a warm body beside you and a cold bleak future. You’re a smart girl. You’ll figure it out.”
She opened the door. “Don’t bother coming in. I only have my carry-on bag. See you in a couple of days.”
Jenna got out anyway and rushed around the front of the car to hug her mother fiercely. “Knock ’em dead, Mom. You’re going to be great.”
Bess hugged her back, then snapped the handle of her small wheeled bag into the tote position and started toward the building. Jenna couldn’t bear to watch her walk away. Her heart was too bruised. She was going to have to decide what to do about Adam, soon. And her mother was right. She couldn’t let fear shape her decision. That meant she needed to talk to Shane.
She got in the car but couldn’t bring herself to turn the key in the ignition.
Shane.
Against her will, she closed her eyes and brought his image to mind. That roguish look in his eyes whenever she said something that amused him. How could one nonsmile make her feel so smart and clever? And in the moonlight last night the pain she’d read in his eyes had broken her heart…after her initial flush of anger had passed. He’d been a victim, too, he’d said. Yet he’d been brave enough to face her.
She rested her head on the steering wheel and took a deep breath. A strand of hair fluttered across her nose, making her nose itch and she sat back sharply and reached in the backseat for her purse.
“Damn,” she muttered, digging through the mess of notes she’d made on napkins, candy wrappers and used envelopes. “Where’s my hair clip?”
She finally found a grubby rubber band and scraped her hair back in a ponytail off her neck. Impatiently she turned the key and backed out of the parking place, barely even glancing behind her. She stepped on the gas and sped out of the parking lot.
She needed to find Shane and discuss what to do next about his brother. But as soon as she had that issue out of the way, she planned to ask him how large a part guilt had played in him kissing her. Because his kiss had haunted her all night—even more than her memories of the past.
Maybe if she were more experienced where love and romance were concerned, she’d know how to tell the difference between a pity kiss and one that felt as if she were the woman he’d looked for his whole life. But she wasn’t. And she was just insecure enough to worry that Shane’s sense of honor and his feelings of guilt were driving this attraction between them.
Her mother was right. If there was something bigger between her and Shane, she needed to find out what it was. She wasn’t going to let Adam ruin her life a second time.
CHAPTER TWELVE
TWENTY MINUTES LATER she pulled into Pauline Smith’s driveway behind a white SUV that was loaded with suitcases.
“Uh-oh.”
Her heart started a frenetic little dance. She didn’t know what she’d thought might happen after the way they ended things last night but running away really didn’t seem like something a Bernese mountain dog would do.
Shane walked out carrying a box of papers. She recognized some as the notes they’d made during the past week of working together. His laptop was sticking out at an angle, too. Hardly packed properly for an airplane trip.
She got out. “Going somewhere?”
He shoved the box beside his suitcase and walked to her, stopping only to sweep her into his arms and kiss her. She was too surprised to do anything but kiss him back. And suddenly she had her answer. This wasn’t about feeling sorry for her. This was about love.
The realization made her push him away. She didn’t love him back. She cared for him. She liked him. She lusted after his body. But she couldn’t love him. Not after what his brother did to her.
“That wasn’t exactly the greeting I was expecting,” she said on a ragged breath.
He shrugged. “I saw an opening and took it.”
“Well, don’t make a habit of it, okay?” When he didn’t answer, she repeated her earlier question. “Where are you going?”
“Deadwood. I rented a suite at one of the casinos. You’re going, too.”
“I beg your pardon? Why would I do that?”
He walked to his car and closed the rear doors. “Because it’s the only way to keep you safe. I thought about moving in with you since your mother is gone, but then I opted for a more public venue. Like a lot of politicians, Adam tends to avoid confrontations that would mean intense public scrutiny.” He didn’t give her time to formulate a reply before he added, “I’ve got a couple of interviews scheduled with the local press, and I’d like you with me to give the Sentinel Pass perspective.”
“Interviews? About what?” Not the rape. She wasn’t ready to go public with that.
“Sentinel Passtime. And giving you a higher profile will make Adam think twice about hassling you.” He paused. “Unless you’ve already gone to the police. In that case I’m calling a bodyguard service.” He dug out his fancy phone.
Bodyguard? “Stop it. You’re scaring me.”
“Good. I want you to take this seriously, Jenna. My brother is not someone you can afford to underestimate. I don’t want to influence your decision. You have to do what’s right for you and I’ll support you any way I can, but, if you want my opinion—”
“I do, actually. Mostly I get sick to my stomach thinking about reopening the case. But there’s a part of me that is appalled by that attitude. He shouldn’t get away with what he did.”
He took her hand and led her to a small, weathered bench. He brushed off some reddish pine needles and waited for her to sit before joining her. She yanked on the hem of her sea-green shorts, wishing she’d worn something more businesslike.
“I talked to Adam this morning. He offered to pay you money to let it go. No specific amount was mentioned, but he’s a very wealthy man, so you could probably name your price.”
She sat back, appalled. “God, this just gets uglier and uglier. Now I get to turn into an extortionist?”
“I told him you wouldn’t go for that kind of deal.”
“What did he say?”
Shane looked at a point over her shoulder. The expression on his beautiful face almost made her cry. “He reminded me of what happens to people who cross him.” He shifted his gaze back to her and clasped her shoulders. His hands were warm, but the intensity of his gaze made her shiver. “Jenna, you’ve got to believe me. My brother is dangerous. I’ve probably always known it, but in the past I could pretend he was just messing with my head. Not anymore. He more or less admitted that he had something to do with a little girl’s death when we were kids.”
Jenna bit her lip, her heart aching for him. “What would you do if you were me?”
He let go of her and turned to sit forward, elbows on knees, hands twisting together. In profile, his eyes were narrowed, his expression intense as he stared at the ground. “Make the deal. Move on with your life.”
She let out an involuntary cry. “No. You wouldn’t say that if you were there that night.”
He swung toward her, his brown eyes filled with pain and compassion. “I was there, Jenna. I saw you talking to him across the room and I thought, ‘Once again the girl of my choice goes for Joe College.’ I don’t know how Adam knew I was interested in you—maybe that twin sense is one-sided where we’re concerned. If not for me, you probably wouldn’t have been his victim.”
He blamed himself, she realized in surprise. “Rape is about power, Shane, not sex. He needed someone to dominate, humiliate and crush. I was cocky, flirtatious and full of myself. I’m not saying what happened was my fault. It wasn’t. But I can see now where someone like your brother would have seen my attitude as a challenge.” She took his hand. “And it wasn’t your fault, either. Maybe he’s mentally ill or just mean. I don’t know, but he has to be held accountable for his actions. Or he’ll do it again.”
Shane looped a lock of hair that had come loose from her ponytail behind her ear with his free hand. The gesture was tender and sweet, and he smiled in a way that told her he appreciated her letting him off the hook but didn’t really believe her that he wasn’t at least partly to blame. “I’ll do whatever you decide is best for you. But at least let me have some control over the logistics. You’ll be with me, or, if you don’t want that, I’ll hire someone to stay with you twenty-four/seven.”
She cocked her head. “You, huh?” She pretended to think about the proposition. “Well…if that’s my only option, I guess I’ll hang with you at the casino. Will there be gambling?”
He smiled. “Why not? Suddenly, I’m feeling lucky.”
She elbowed him playfully. “Oh, really?”
His blush was totally out of character and endearing. “I didn’t mean…I…”
She laughed and brushed a quick kiss across his lips. She wasn’t a naive little girl anymore, and she sure as hell was nobody’s victim. She decided who she wanted to be with and why. Despite all the reasons not to get involved with him, she liked the way he made her feel—alive and smart and valued. Even if nothing long-term could come of it, she was entitled to grab a little gusto while she had the chance.
“So, do I have time to go home and pack a bag?” she asked.
He pulled her to her feet and walked her to her car. “I’ll follow you there, then we’ll take mine to Deadwood.”
As she drove home—with Shane right behind her—she tried to picture what would happen between them once she contacted the authorities in Brookings and got the case reopened. Even if Shane felt no familial loyalty to his brother, Adam’s arrest—and his relationship to Shane—would probably make the news.
Her stomach turned over as she pictured the headlines: Sentinel Passtime Producer Beds Brother’s Rape Victim. The complications could be horrific, but she couldn’t not do something.
She’d give herself a couple of days to figure out what to do. Once Adam was arrested and Shane knew she was safe, Shane could go back to California and direct the TV pilot. She’d use the money that she earned from scriptwriting to hire a lawyer to make sure justice was served.
She pulled into her driveway, smiling at the white car that stopped a few inches from her bumper. After that, they’d see.
“SWEET,” SHE SAID, stepping into the spacious, luxuriously appointed room a couple of hours later. “No pun intended,” she added with a chortle.
Shane groaned. “Really awful.”
They’d wound up swinging past the Mystery Spot before heading to Deadwood. Everything was fine; the parking lot well over half-filled.
He closed the door behind them, dropping their two bags beside the door of the adjoining bedroom, and looked around. “Not quite what I asked for. Only one bedroom, but I guess we should be thankful they had anything available. Is this town always this busy?”
He set the pair of plastic entry passes on a replica antique table as he moved farther into the room. The motif was early bordello but with modern amenities, like a flat-screen TV inside an armoire. He walked to the ruby velvet sofa and tested it out. “The desk clerk said this makes into a bed, so we’ll be okay.”
“Uh-huh,” she mumbled, strolling into the bathroom. “Oh, my Lord,” she cried, “I’ve died and gone to heaven. Look at this.”
The jetted tub was the size of her entire bathroom at home. Clever little battery-operated candles of various sizes were grouped in the far corner. She picked up a tiny bottle from a tray of assorted bath amenities. Ylang-ylang. Not a scent she was familiar with but one she’d been dying to try. She unscrewed the top and sniffed. “Nice.”
She checked her watch, then looked over her shoulder at Shane, who was lounging against the door frame watching her. “Did I overhear you make dinner reservations? Do I have time for a soak?”
“Absolutely. I’ll set up my laptop and get some work done.” He disappeared before she could come up with a clever way to invite him to join her. He’d been nothing but professional ever since he’d assumed the role of bodyguard, which, perversely, she found both annoying and a challenge.
; She kicked off her sandals and walked to the opposite end of the tub to open the valves. Hot moist steam rose almost immediately as the bath began to fill. She upended the little bottle under the cascade of water and breathed deeply. The scent was relaxing, yet slightly exotic. Intriguing even.
Returning to her original spot, she drew up her bare feet and rested her back against the tile to watch the tub fill…and pout. God, I suck at flirtatious banter.
Although, the thought hit her, she’d held her own when she and Shane were writing dialogue for Cooper’s and Libby’s characters. Shane had laughed often and praised Jenna for adding an extra kick of spice that he would have missed. She’d credited all the chick-lit romance novels Char had made the book-club members read, but maybe there was some coy, provocative, sex goddess inside her waiting to come out.
Yeah, right. Her snort of laughter made Shane pop his head into the room. He had their two overnight bags in hand. “You okay? There’s bottled water in the minibar.”
“Right, Midas. And there’s a convenience store on the corner that sells the same brand for under a buck,” she said dryly. “My father used to say hotel minibars were a sucker’s road to perdition.”
He disappeared but returned a moment later with a distinctive green bottle of French water in one hand and two champagne flutes in the other. “We’re in Deadwood,” he said with a wink. “How’s the saying go? ‘Pray for me. I just left hell and I’m headed to Deadwood’?”
She took the glass, shaking her head. “Not exactly, but write that down. It sounds like something Coop’s character would say.”
He filled their glasses and they toasted lightly. The faint tinkle of crystal raised gooseflesh on her arms.
“You’re cold,” he said. “I’ll close the door behind me.”
She spun around on her butt and kicked out one leg, blocking his exit. “I’d rather you stayed.”
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